What is this chick's deal? Opinions please

Hey guys

Just want some opinions on a current situation I'm dealing with.

Met a cute girl who is my cousin's coworker and friends with my cousin's girlfriend a couple weeks ago at my cousins birthday party. long story short, we had sex that weekend and exchanged numbers. i thought she was interesting and tried to see where this was going

Saw her again a couple weeks later with my cousin, his girl and a couple of their friends. We all went to a bar and played some pool. end of the night, all the girls had to go cause they had work early in the am. We made out and vowed to make plans late next week.

3rd time out with her was out first 1 on 1 date. It was during this time i realized her personality was actually kind of annoying and started to think of her as more of a potential friend w benefits/booty call then anyone I would actually date (shes smoking hot if that isnt obvious already).

After dinner, we ended up at a quiet little bar. at around 1am, she invited me back to her house. Seeing as I had a huge important meeting in the morning and we live on completely opposite ends of the city, I denied and playfully said next time. her response was playful and she said something like "wow youre actually denying my invite" to which I said we'll make up for it next time. We kissed good night, and I went home. She texted me thanking me.

Next day my cousin messages and told me im blowing it. Apparently, she was offended I denied her advances and was *****ing to my cousins gf about it. At the end of the day, I had a big day at work and was just looking to let loose that night with a few drinks....we've already had sex and I initiated the date so I really dont see how she can think im not interested


anyway just curious what you guys think and how i should approach the situation because she is super sexy and i would love to booty call her in the future...dont want her shattered ego stopping me from hitting it

few additional facts
- this chick texts a lot when she responds but never initiates ever
- takes hours to reply
- goes from very mushy and lovey dovey to ball breaker, although playfully, at the drop of a hat

very different from most girls ive hooked up with.

chime in with any thoughts on the situation.. thanks mates

"Apparently, she was offended I denied her advances and was *****ing to my cousins gf about it"

For all you know she may have just vented and not *****ed.

I think you still got a chance but that's a red flag if I have ever seen one.

Just ask her out, I'm sure she will want to see you.

Ignore what your cousin says, shes trying to help but in my experience women give terrible advice for dating or building attraction. I've denied a girl when shes invited me over and yes they ***** about it but they do that because they are pissed off because they dont understand why youre not losing frame at their beauty. Youll be fine with her she knows youre not desperate

Hmm said:

"Apparently, she was offended I denied her advances and was *****ing to my cousins gf about it"

For all you know she may have just vented and not *****ed.

I think you still got a chance but that's a red flag if I have ever seen one.

Just ask her out, I'm sure she will want to see you.

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well why would she mention it if it didnt bother her?

in the past, turning down sex has made girls want me way more...especially when ive already slept with them

like i wanted to hang out and have some drinks and go home.

ive had sex before....its not the be all end all to me anymore and we live in the same city and could really do it anytime...really dont see how this was a big deal

its times like this when i feel like im right back at square 1 understanding women...

Tuppy said:

Ignore what your cousin says, shes trying to help but in my experience women give terrible advice for dating or building attraction. I've denied a girl when shes invited me over and yes they ***** about it but they do that because they are pissed off because they dont understand why youre not losing frame at their beauty. Youll be fine with her she knows youre not desperate

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lol I should clarify, my cousin is a dude. this girl is friends with his girlfriend so they talk then she tells my cousin who tells me so i always have the scoop

and i agree with you. but although we kissed and had a nice parting, shes been pretty distant since the date. i guess shes just trying to counter how i responded and regain some kind of perceived power?

Massive signs of BPD...

Me guess is that she is used to guys fumbling all over themselves to get in her pants and she can't believe you passed up the chance. Good for you for having your priorities straight, and I do believe it will build attraction in her.

My gf still talks about how on the night we met, I chatted her up a bit, played some shuffleboard with her then walked away from her and went back to my friends. Blew her away that I wasn't falling all over her. She bought me a drink and came looking for me. I established frame right off and have had it since.

anyone have any advice how to proceed?

basically, i texted her and told her to come over to my side of the city...she told me shes working and has class all week but asked what i was doing for the upcoming weekend...i told her id be in the city w some friends and to come over if she frees up before then to which didnt reply

chick is weird in the sense when we're together shes responsive, touches me, doesnt pull away when I rub her legs and kiss.....and most importantly, wev already had sex....but when im not with her she never initiates anything.....very different from any girl ive been with

i dont care if im not on her list priorities or if she really likes me....i know from my inside sources she basically wants a friends with benefits kind of thing and even told my cousin i dont "chase her enough" but in my experience chasing too hard gets you in the friend zone quickly

basically, she never initiates anything ever but when i have seen her shes super super responsive....chasing this hard goes against my intuition but it seems to be the only way to arrange meet ups


advice appreciated