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i realized out of the blue

amazingswayze

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 26, 2015
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i've been feeling some sort of stress that i couldn't identify recently. i realized what it was. buried in my subconscious is a feeling of guilt. let me explain.

i started acting out of character when my summer classes started. they're over now, but a lot has happened. long story short, i got with 3 girls from my class, and i'm basically on bad terms with all of them. this is not good because i have to see them for the next 4 years in my nursing class.

i've been acting according to the don juan concepts i've learned so far but sometimes i go overboard. i need to adjust my game based on the situation. as pook says, "be not contained by formula". for the most part, i have been.

i pressured these girls for sex, and in return, didn't get any. at the time i was just acting according to my hormones. HB6 kayla, (still a virgin, i was her first kiss) was under the impression i just want her as a FB so she LJBF'd me. I told her it's impossible for me to just be friends with her and I want sex. Now i'm trying to do NC but it's impossible because she's in a few of my classes. I ignored her in school today and felt bad about it after. she texted me a question and i responded "idk".

So is HB6 Patricia who not only gave me head but also gave me a punch in the face on one peculiar drunken night. I'm being friendly with her but things will never be the same. i told her after she disrespected me that i can't put up with that behavior and our friendship won't be able to work.

then you have HB7 Alexis. we made out on that same drunken night at her apartment when i also tried to fuk her. it was cool between us but a few days later she rejected me when i invited her to my place. that rejection had me feeling some type of way.

i want to run game on these girls but it is pretty damn hard to burn bridges when i have to see them for the next 4 years. i don't want to be a total nice guy about this but I realized I've been a dik about these situations and i just want to spread love, and build good relationships for the next 4 years. what i need to do is explain this to HB6 Kayla and salvage what is left of it, for my own sake.

i've been a dik about this. hooking up with girls in my nursing class. silly me. maybe i just couldn't be cool about it. i was very eager to have sex, and that blinded me from doing the right thing. part of it is because i have limited options elsewhere which is why i gamed these girls in the first place.

i have to expand my dating to other places so if i need to burn bridges, there will be no consequences. things are awkward now, and i feel awkward. i have to fix this to make my college experience better.

i might still try to fuk HB6 kayla because we had a good thing going but I will be less agressive with my attempts and overall be indifferent. i was blinded by the thought of pu$$y, probably cause i never had any. now my rational brain is telling me to be careful who i hook up with.

i can fix this by spreading positivity and love. also i need to stop giving a fuk.

this is just something i realized out of the blue. :eek:
 

marmel75

Master Don Juan
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Jan 4, 2012
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You are 17...you have a lot to learn brother.
 
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