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If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Self improvement is not everything...

Highschoolkidzz

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Hey Guys

I just wanted to give you some thoughts you can chew on..
As Doctorcoops said in in his Thread there are two sides of being an Don Juan:
The girls and the self-improvement.

Now self-improvement is really important. Especially the Confidence aspect about it. It is of huge significance to feel good about yourself and to be able to act on what you want. But some people take it too far..

You know to get a girl especially in Highschool you just gotta be:

1) Hot enough for girls to like you
2) Confident enough to socialize and to talk with them
3) Have the balls to ask them out or to close the deal

Some people focus SO MUCH on the confidence and self-improvement part that they forget what the real goal is. That is getting girls.
Sure you can say self improve yourself and the chicks will come but that is not quite the case. There are some losers who dont have a job, live with their moms and still get more pu**y than the self-improvement guy who knows every social situation.

Now I am not saying that self-improvement is not important. In fact it is very important for your personal life and is the basis of being able to get a girl but thats about it. You gotta now that there is a point where you have self-improved yourself enough to be in the place of being able to slay girls.
Just think to yourself.. There are so many guys that DONT read self-improvement but have had more ***** than you. You might be more improved but they have learned the SKILL of getting a girl.
In the end its still about not how improved you are but if you can get the girl..

Feel free to comment and tell about your thoughts :)
 

No.Danny

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The girls are never the goal. Never
 

Highschoolkidzz

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It is what it is bro! Girls CAN be a goal. So can Self-improvement.
Let the people choose accordingly.
I could now decide to mass date girls and if its my goal I could say I wanna sleep with a specific amount of girls and work towards that..
 

No.Danny

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Highschoolkidzz said:
It is what it is bro! Girls CAN be a goal. So can Self-improvement.
Let the people choose accordingly.
I could now decide to mass date girls and if its my goal I could say I wanna sleep with a specific amount of girls and work towards that..
The goal is to fulfill yourself and create inner happiness the rest will come, go ahead with your goal and be left in vain
 

Highschoolkidzz

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No prob Doctorcoops : )

I know thats what they all told us.. just be happy and everytjing comes.. But just try to critique it for once. Why should you get it all passively just because your there being happy? No work anymore because it flows because of all the hapiness? Kinda seems weird to me if you ask me. I rather would like to believe that happiness is the footsetter that will help you to achieve your goals. And thats where true hapiness comes from.. By getting what you wanted in life.
 

NorwegianDJ

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Highschoolkidzz said:
No prob Doctorcoops : )

I know thats what they all told us.. just be happy and everytjing comes.. But just try to critique it for once. Why should you get it all passively just because your there being happy? No work anymore because it flows because of all the hapiness? Kinda seems weird to me if you ask me. I rather would like to believe that happiness is the footsetter that will help you to achieve your goals. And thats where true hapiness comes from.. By getting what you wanted in life.
What we want in life, are you saying you attain happiness by the belief that you have all you want in life, or by attaning everything you want in life? Those are two very different things.

Moreover, following your approach, would it not be easier to change your desires of what you want instead of working endlessly to attain it? It'd be easier to be content with making people happy than having to earn millions, have multiple assets, stable life, women etc. Life is rarely consistent and if one's happiness depends on it, you are in for a bumpy ride.

The argument behind self-improvement is that you can take control of your life and consequently have more trust and thus confidence in yourself. An intrinsic confidence that is unwavered by your external circumstances - being grounded, in a sense. It is certainly worth an investment of time.

Now, women. Self-improvement and getting laid/going for girls is mostly distinct. Self-improvement helps with girls and vice-versa, but only to a certain extent. That does not mean you should do one and not the other - they are not mutually exclusive. Disregarding one of them is just an excuse based in fear.

Lastly, I want to say that self-improvement is a very fruitful endeavor, it compounds and you learn a lot down the road, a lot of it is just staying true to yourself and having an open mind and filling it with information. Girls, however, are fleeting. Happiness will be fleeting, because they will be part of your identity.

I had my splurge with girls when I was your age. It's all there in my journal. But I also focused on self-improvement. Those books that I read and the things that I did are a very central part of who I am today. Those girls? Not so much, rather a reference experience of what I have done and can do. Nowadays it matters more to me what type of girl she is, do I like her, does she like me, is she fun? etcetera.
 

Highschoolkidzz

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NorwegianDJ said:
What we want in life, are you saying you attain happiness by the belief that you have all you want in life, or by attaning everything you want in life? Those are two very different things.

Moreover, following your approach, would it not be easier to change your desires of what you want instead of working endlessly to attain it? It'd be easier to be content with making people happy than having to earn millions, have multiple assets, stable life, women etc. Life is rarely consistent and if one's happiness depends on it, you are in for a bumpy ride.

The argument behind self-improvement is that you can take control of your life and consequently have more trust and thus confidence in yourself. An intrinsic confidence that is unwavered by your external circumstances - being grounded, in a sense. It is certainly worth an investment of time.

Now, women. Self-improvement and getting laid/going for girls is mostly distinct. Self-improvement helps with girls and vice-versa, but only to a certain extent. That does not mean you should do one and not the other - they are not mutually exclusive. Disregarding one of them is just an excuse based in fear.

Lastly, I want to say that self-improvement is a very fruitful endeavor, it compounds and you learn a lot down the road, a lot of it is just staying true to yourself and having an open mind and filling it with information. Girls, however, are fleeting. Happiness will be fleeting, because they will be part of your identity.

I had my splurge with girls when I was your age. It's all there in my journal. But I also focused on self-improvement. Those books that I read and the things that I did are a very central part of who I am today. Those girls? Not so much, rather a reference experience of what I have done and can do. Nowadays it matters more to me what type of girl she is, do I like her, does she like me, is she fun? etcetera.
Hey NWdj

I have to say that I completely agree with you. You really said everything that I was thinking about. Self-improvement IS a fruitful endeavor. A VERY fruitful one actually.. But there are limits to it when it comes to the girls. There the distinction can begin.
You know and this is exactly what I was trying to say.. many people mistake self-improvement for being the ability to get girls. Those two things can be different things. It doesen´t entirely rely upon my self-improvement if I can go on a date with a girl. I still have to PERSUE that GOAL if I want.
And the other thing you said about life not being consistent... Youre right that making other people happy will improve your own life and make you truly happy but I think ACTIVELY working towards the things you dream about be it having a million dollars or being the best at something, is also something that will truly satisfy you and make you feel like a man.
 

NorwegianDJ

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I just wanted to make a point of how 'the dream', what you want in life, that jazz, can be anything. It is malleable, therefore you could argue that changing that vision to something simple is a lot more effective than working towards something possibly unattainable :)
 

Highschoolkidzz

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Yeah youre right ruler!

The only thing to remember that pvssycan be seperate. So if one wants to be able and learn how to get it he should concentrate ON getting pvssy and not make self-improvement an excuse for it. Cause that is what people often think. That you need to be the most innerly awesome guy to be able to get pvssy.
 

yungballa

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women are neeeeeever the goal. improve yourself. determination never betrays.
 
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