I’m 18, a senior in high school. I’ve been dating my current gf since late Jan./early February. She’s one of the good girl types who hasn’t done anything sexual in her life, while I have a good amount of experience. We haven’t had sex yet, but she has given hand jobs once a week for the past month and a half, and I fingered her once a couple weekends ago. We have a decent relationship. She likes me a lot but I find her annoying sometimes. I try to limit how much we talk so I don’t get too burnt out on her so we talk maybe 2 times a week and hang out once. I had plans to watch a movie at her house this past Saturday, but first I went to a friend’s birthday party on Friday.
At the party on Friday, I drank a lot and got really drunk. I went to just chill/lie on the couch, and before I know it a girl (Let’s call her Girl A) I know is lying with me and trying very hard to get with me. She starts telling me all these things about how all the girls in our school think I’m “hot as ****” (guess I’m doing something right lol) and how it’s ok if I don’t want to hook up because of my gf. We didn’t really kiss mouth-to-mouth, but I think I was kissing her neck and she spent a lot of time kissing my neck/chest area while talking to me. She started touching my **** and putting hand on her ass/*****. I told her I didn’t want to do anything because there were too many people around and I didn’t want it to spread. At one point she said we should go to another room and have sex, but I just told her “another day”. There was only like 15 people I’m good friends with and who wouldn’t tell anyone else, but at the time I thought that it would spread. Truth be told I was very close to getting with her and probably would have if I wasn’t concerned about this. I liked how she has sexual experience and is good at it, unlike my gf who doesn’t really know anything. She also dated one of my friends a year or so ago, and that was just another reason I didn’t end up doing it. Eventually I got up and left. I talked to one of her sober friends at the party later and she said that Girl A always thought I was hot, but really started to want to get with me after we talked for a couple hours at a school event and went to Six Flags with a couple mutual friends. Her friend also said that Girl A gets kind of possessive, and Girl A didn’t want her friend to sit too close to me. Girl A’s friend also said some more stuff about how a lot of girls are obsessed with me (I don’t really talk to more than 2-3 girls in my school, and none that Girl A/her friend talk to).
The next day, I went to my gf’s house to watch a movie. I felt a little bit guilty and that she should know, but I didn’t tell her. There’s not going to be any way she finds out unless I tell her or ask a friend to tell her. Anyway, we started watching the movie whatever. We started making out and escalating, and we were at the point where we both were completely shirtless with her hand inside my parents. Next thing I know her mom starts coming downstairs with cookies she made and we scrambling to put our clothes on. I get my shirt on, but she only could put her bra on before her mom came. Her mom seemed like she was upset and didn’t know how to react. She just gave us the cookies and walked away. My gf went to talk to her, but said that her mom didn’t really say anything and she wasn’t sure if she was mad or not. We just sat there watching tv for a little while, and then I started to escalate again. I tried guiding her hands to my **** again, but she resisted and said she wasn’t “in the mood.” I ignored it and tried again a few more min. of making out but she wouldn’t do it. Then, I tried to lean in to continue kissing but she wouldn’t even do that. Annoyed, I pushed her off me. We watched tv for 10 min. and I ended up leaving. 20 minutes after, she sends me a text apologizing saying that she understands that she was probably being annoying and that her mom seemed upset but wasn’t saying anything so it’s weird and annoying. I just told her it’s fine, and I understood. I said to just sort things out in the morning and to tell her mom the cookies were very good. She responded to this text, saying that she told her mom and “she laughed, which might be a good sign.” I didn’t respond to this text.
I know this ended up very long but I’m a little bit confused right now. I feel like my gf should know and I feel a little bit guilty, but I don’t think I have it in me/should tell her I cheated right to her face. I feel like she’s the type to get emotional about this type of things, so I would hate to be one to break the “news” to her. I like her, but also I wouldn’t really care if we broke up. I thought about maybe telling a mutual friend to tell her very vague details about Friday just saying that Girl A was all over me and nothing else in hopes that she would ask me about it. Sometimes (like now) I really don’t feel like even talking to her and I’ve thought about ending it, but it would complicate things as I would have to find another prom date (like I said, I don’t talk to many girls so this would be annoying), and we bought tickets to an EDM festival in late May with a couple mutual friends. We’re going to different colleges later anyway, and if we keep it going I’ll eventually break up with her around August because I plan on experiencing other girls in college. Any advice? Thanks
TL;DR:
- Senior in high school, have been dating my gf for a couple months
- Went to party that gf wasn’t at, ended up cheating (no direct kissing, but I was kissing her neck, she kissed my neck/chest, her hand on my ****, my hands on her). Girl wanted to take it further but I stopped. I liked that she was experienced sexually and escalating it by herself, unlike my gf who is very sexually reserved/inexperienced
- Went to gf’s house the next night, her mom caught us making out with shirts off. Gf didn’t want to give me a hand job after, I got annoyed with her and left soon after. She sent me a text apologizing and I told her it was fine.
- Not sure whether to talk to gf about cheating (wouldn't care too much if we break up) or pretend like it didn’t happen.
- Breaking up would gf would complicate things with a concert we bought tickets to in late May and I'd have to find another prom date (which would be annoying to do)
At the party on Friday, I drank a lot and got really drunk. I went to just chill/lie on the couch, and before I know it a girl (Let’s call her Girl A) I know is lying with me and trying very hard to get with me. She starts telling me all these things about how all the girls in our school think I’m “hot as ****” (guess I’m doing something right lol) and how it’s ok if I don’t want to hook up because of my gf. We didn’t really kiss mouth-to-mouth, but I think I was kissing her neck and she spent a lot of time kissing my neck/chest area while talking to me. She started touching my **** and putting hand on her ass/*****. I told her I didn’t want to do anything because there were too many people around and I didn’t want it to spread. At one point she said we should go to another room and have sex, but I just told her “another day”. There was only like 15 people I’m good friends with and who wouldn’t tell anyone else, but at the time I thought that it would spread. Truth be told I was very close to getting with her and probably would have if I wasn’t concerned about this. I liked how she has sexual experience and is good at it, unlike my gf who doesn’t really know anything. She also dated one of my friends a year or so ago, and that was just another reason I didn’t end up doing it. Eventually I got up and left. I talked to one of her sober friends at the party later and she said that Girl A always thought I was hot, but really started to want to get with me after we talked for a couple hours at a school event and went to Six Flags with a couple mutual friends. Her friend also said that Girl A gets kind of possessive, and Girl A didn’t want her friend to sit too close to me. Girl A’s friend also said some more stuff about how a lot of girls are obsessed with me (I don’t really talk to more than 2-3 girls in my school, and none that Girl A/her friend talk to).
The next day, I went to my gf’s house to watch a movie. I felt a little bit guilty and that she should know, but I didn’t tell her. There’s not going to be any way she finds out unless I tell her or ask a friend to tell her. Anyway, we started watching the movie whatever. We started making out and escalating, and we were at the point where we both were completely shirtless with her hand inside my parents. Next thing I know her mom starts coming downstairs with cookies she made and we scrambling to put our clothes on. I get my shirt on, but she only could put her bra on before her mom came. Her mom seemed like she was upset and didn’t know how to react. She just gave us the cookies and walked away. My gf went to talk to her, but said that her mom didn’t really say anything and she wasn’t sure if she was mad or not. We just sat there watching tv for a little while, and then I started to escalate again. I tried guiding her hands to my **** again, but she resisted and said she wasn’t “in the mood.” I ignored it and tried again a few more min. of making out but she wouldn’t do it. Then, I tried to lean in to continue kissing but she wouldn’t even do that. Annoyed, I pushed her off me. We watched tv for 10 min. and I ended up leaving. 20 minutes after, she sends me a text apologizing saying that she understands that she was probably being annoying and that her mom seemed upset but wasn’t saying anything so it’s weird and annoying. I just told her it’s fine, and I understood. I said to just sort things out in the morning and to tell her mom the cookies were very good. She responded to this text, saying that she told her mom and “she laughed, which might be a good sign.” I didn’t respond to this text.
I know this ended up very long but I’m a little bit confused right now. I feel like my gf should know and I feel a little bit guilty, but I don’t think I have it in me/should tell her I cheated right to her face. I feel like she’s the type to get emotional about this type of things, so I would hate to be one to break the “news” to her. I like her, but also I wouldn’t really care if we broke up. I thought about maybe telling a mutual friend to tell her very vague details about Friday just saying that Girl A was all over me and nothing else in hopes that she would ask me about it. Sometimes (like now) I really don’t feel like even talking to her and I’ve thought about ending it, but it would complicate things as I would have to find another prom date (like I said, I don’t talk to many girls so this would be annoying), and we bought tickets to an EDM festival in late May with a couple mutual friends. We’re going to different colleges later anyway, and if we keep it going I’ll eventually break up with her around August because I plan on experiencing other girls in college. Any advice? Thanks
TL;DR:
- Senior in high school, have been dating my gf for a couple months
- Went to party that gf wasn’t at, ended up cheating (no direct kissing, but I was kissing her neck, she kissed my neck/chest, her hand on my ****, my hands on her). Girl wanted to take it further but I stopped. I liked that she was experienced sexually and escalating it by herself, unlike my gf who is very sexually reserved/inexperienced
- Went to gf’s house the next night, her mom caught us making out with shirts off. Gf didn’t want to give me a hand job after, I got annoyed with her and left soon after. She sent me a text apologizing and I told her it was fine.
- Not sure whether to talk to gf about cheating (wouldn't care too much if we break up) or pretend like it didn’t happen.
- Breaking up would gf would complicate things with a concert we bought tickets to in late May and I'd have to find another prom date (which would be annoying to do)
