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On the subject of hugging...

brod716

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How is the hug to be presented?
Is it OK to greet her on the 3rd date with a hug?
It feels kinda weird, since we don't really know each other, and the hug is quite intimate. How's the hug with other people present around, won't She feel uncomfortable?

I know that a hug has to be two-way, but I feel in this situation I need to encourage her to be more open. Any ideas?
 

mrblue1022

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Actually hugging is the most common form of greeting in the world. Peoples of all cultures uses hugs just to say hi or bye, not only as a sign of romantic affection.

But more specific to your question, I think you are thinking way too much into this. Just let it happen. Hug her and see how she respondes. I am sure a lot of you are tired of me saying this, but this all has to do with confidance. Just have the confidance to make the move, if it happens it happens, if it doesnt it doesn't. No big deal. It's not like it's a life or death thing, just go with the flow.

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Taz

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I agree, just hug her and see how she responds. It will probably be positive, and if it's not, ask her if she's a hemophiliac or something.

"Is it OK to greet her on the 3rd date with a hug?"

Of course! How did you greet her on the other two, a hand shake? By now you should be able to greet her with a slap on the ass! Just kidding, hugging is a very common way of greeting people.
 

Patroclus82

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At the ball I attended yesterday, I was getting hugged by women I had never seen before.

The hug is coming back into fashion as the 'only' way to say hello/goodbye.

Laters

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bigbob

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There's nothing wrong with a hug. Just don't try to grind on her.
 

Gator Ash

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Originally posted by bigbob:
There's nothing wrong with a hug. Just don't try to grind on her.
Good idea. Don't hug a girl if you have a raging hard on either. Also, don't let out a massive, nasty fart when you hug girl and then say, "Gee, you must have squeezed me too hard."
 

brod716

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guys, come on, don't be ridiculous, it was an innocent question, u started talking about farting and hard-on's... just suppose that we are all well-raised individuals with a sense of right and wrong, not average American chums... or is it chimps?


thanks 4 ur input.
 

Patroclus82

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Originally posted by Gator Ash:
Good idea. Don't hug a girl if you have a raging hard on either. Also, don't let out a massive, nasty fart when you hug girl and then say, "Gee, you must have squeezed me too hard."
Man, you just made my week.

That is damn funny.

Laters



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Patroclus82

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Sorry about before Brod.

But with hugging, there is always a giver and a reciever, like with kissing.

Recieving a hug is much nicer than giving one. Except if the woman tries to squeeze the life out of you...It has happened


So keep a sharp eye out, if she looks like she is about to go for one, take it and give her a nice squeeze.


Don't be afraid or shy, hugging is good.

Laters

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Absolute Intrigue.
 

BGC

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I think the hug sets the tone for your relationship.

The moment I see the chick that I'm having a coffee with, on our first meeting, I get up from my table, smile as she approaches, and put out my arms as wide as they go and give her a hug.

If you ever watch "Blind Date," watch for whether the guy gives the girl a hug. I pointed out to some people long ago that if he gives her a hug, the date has a high chance of seeing both of them like each other. Now it could be because the guys who give the hugs happen to be the better daters, but I think a part of it HAS to be that the first hug upon first meeting her sets the tone for the date -- warm and affectionate.

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Don_Juanabe

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Here is the deal:

A woman will only date a confident man. So if she is on a first date with you she assumes you are confident. If she determines that you are not confident, this will be two dates in one -- first and last.

You are a man. You go after what you want, because you want it. If you want to hug a girl you hug her. You don't wonder whether or not she wants you to hug her -- the point is that that is what YOU want, and moreover, your wondering if it's okay is an excuse, a stall tactic to use on yourself because you are NOT confident. Forget wondering, just be confident.

Now, the reason there is nothing wrong with hugging is that it isn't invasive. You don't kiss a girl at the beginning of a first date because it is invasive -- you are involving an orifice (her mouth), and even a kiss on the cheek still involves YOUR orifice. Orifi = invasion, so she first needs to feel comfortable, safe, even aroused, with you.

By hugging a girl you show her that you are confident. She knows you wanted to hug her, otherwise you wouldn't have done so, and since it involves touching she knows you are not nervous or afraid. She wants you to be confident and to SHOW her you are confident. Also, girls like to hug, they like to touch. By hugging you show her you are affectionate, and girls like that. Also, it does set the tone for more intimate touching later, since you start a date with touching/affection, then have a great time and make her laugh and enjoy your company, she will likely be receptive to more touching.

Also keep in mind: if she assumes you are the way a man should be, 1) confident and 2) you go after what you want, then by not hugging her she may unconsciously feel that you simply are not very attracted to her.

Go for what you want. You'll find out if it's what she wants when you do so, but she won't let you know that until you go for it.

DJBe
 

Scarface

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I dont think hugging is that intimate at all...

Try going to a High School now a days and walk the hallways, and see how many people hug and how really no thought is put into it at all...
 

Scarface

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I dont think hugging is that intimate at all...

Try going to a High School now a days and walk the hallways, and see how many people hug and how really no thought is put into it at all...
 

SuperM

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Scarface is right. Hugging is really not that intimate.
 

Tarnished

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I agree with Scarface...hugging is not as intimate as it was at one point in time. I hug ever girl that I'm friends with and all it means is "Hey...yer my buddy". But...hugging is ALWAYS a nice icebreaker


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brod716

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Originally posted by Tarnished:
I agree with Scarface...hugging is not as intimate as it was at one point in time. I hug ever girl that I'm friends with and all it means is "Hey...yer my buddy". But...hugging is ALWAYS a nice icebreaker

- Yes, and this is another thing, wouldn't this just put me even closer to the friendship zone with her??

Thanks 4 all your replies!
 

Hidden-Danjer

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What is it with people and hugs?

I was at a party last night andlike patroclus82 I also hugged several people I have never met (ya reckon its a british thing mattey?)

Hell, I eeven hugged some of my male friends, only cos I was covered in foam (it was a foam party) and I wanted to mess up their clean clothes!

Bwahahahar!


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*Hidden-Danjer*

The English have spoken.
 

SuperM

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I read somewhere that hugging too long or too much DOES put you more into the friend zone.
 

Patroclus82

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Danjer-MAN, I guess we Brits are a bit more cultured than the American dudes.....They obviously have troble expressing their emotions in public....


Give me a hug my English friend.

Laters



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