Girl is hesitant to get sexual?

So there’s this girl that’s shown a lot of interest in me the past few months, so about 5 weeks ago we starting hanging out alone on the weekends (we’re both seniors in high school). First three weeks were just standard dates, all ending in a lot of making out. On the fourth date, she brought up the “what is this/what are we” questions and we decided to be boyfriend and girlfriend. This time, we went a little bit farther, and she gave me a hand job. I was rubbing her ***** from outside her pants, but when I tried to go inside her pants, she gave me a “Nuh-uh,” and moved my hand away. It wasn’t in a *****y tone, more of a lighthearted, laughing, smiling type of thing. I tried a couple more times, but she stopped me each time. At one point I said “It’s for you,” to which she responded “I know.” I asked “what’s the problem then?”, and she didn’t have an answer, she just kind of shrugged her shoulders. Again, all of this was with a nice tone while she was smiling. Later that night when we were saying goodbye, she asked if I was being “sincere” when I agreed to be bf/gf or if it was just for sex. I do like being with her a lot, so I told her it was sincere, which was the truth. This weekend, she came over to my house and we watched a movie in my basement. We cuddled while watching the movie, and starting making after it. Got the same thing when I tried to put my hand in her pants, and I didn’t get a hand job this time. She said that she had dance practice early in the morning, and that she told her dad she would be home by 11 (it was already 10:50), so she had to leave.

She’s a “good” girl so to speak, I don’t she’s kissed more than 2 guys (including me), and I’m definitely the first guy that she’s gone past kissing with. On the other hand, I haven’t had sex yet, but I have hooked up with a few girls and gotten a ******* in the past. I think she may be worried that I just want her for sex (not true) or doesn’t want to come across as too easy. I’m relatively new to this type of stuff, so I don’t know what to do. From what I understand, girls like sex just as much as guys, and I already committed to being in a relationship with her, so what could be holding her back? I understand that we’re not going to have sex right away and that we’re going to have to work our way up over the next month or two, but it seems like stimulating her with my hand/fingers seems like the next step. She’s only my second girlfriend, so I’m not sure how this goes. Should I talk to her about it next time?

It sounds like you sincerely care about her, and she feels the same about you. Be careful, and just play things right.

You seem like you have good intentions. Just don't caught being the "nice guy" with her. If you don't know what I mean then there are plenty of material on here about it.

I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're doing. You guys are still in high school anyway. But it sounds like a good idea to talk to her about it at some point. Since you want a relationship anyway, and not just sex, communication is important. So you should be honest with her, but at the same time don't put her on a pedestal or give your self-worth to her. You are a man on your own, and you shouldn't be afraid to speak what's on your mind.

But if she doesn't want to, then there's really not much else to do other than respect her decision. And then from there you can make your decision if it's worth it to stay with her or not. And only you can answer that question for yourself.

She's most likely a virgin. Good for you.

You can still fcuk her, however you'd have to use a reverse approach.

Next time you spend time with her, don't do the heavy kissing, heavy groping. You can kiss her for a few seconds here and there and PULL AWAY. Talk to her, get to know her, compliment her.

Repeat the above again on a different day. If you mesmerize her mind, her pussie would follow.

Third time you see her, make sure it's somewhere you can fcuk her, then try again.

This girl has already fcuked you in her head. She just wants to know you some more before she let's you be her first.

In this case, patience is key. If you rush her or push for it, you'd lose the punani.

So act like pussie isnt on your mind. Act like you're more interested in her and next thing you'd know she'll be willingly taking her panties off.:rockon:

Talk to her. Conversation is always best way to go. I am sure you will find out what is going on because it is obvious that you care about her.

stevo said:

She's most likely a virgin. Good for you.

You can still fcuk her, however you'd have to use a reverse approach.

Next time you spend time with her, don't do the heavy kissing, heavy groping. You can kiss her for a few seconds here and there and PULL AWAY. Talk to her, get to know her, compliment her.

Repeat the above again on a different day. If you mesmerize her mind, her pussie would follow.

Third time you see her, make sure it's somewhere you can fcuk her, then try again.

This girl has already fcuked you in her head. She just wants to know you some more before she let's you be her first.

In this case, patience is key. If you rush her or push for it, you'd lose the punani.

So act like pussie isnt on your mind. Act like you're more interested in her and next thing you'd know she'll be willingly taking her panties off.:rockon:

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I tried listening to your advice, but think I ****ed up tonight. We went out for dinner and walked to an ice cream place. Saw our mutual friends (who are also dating) there and talked for a little bit. One thing that came up there was that the girls wanted to go on a double date thing next Friday. After ice cream, we went back to my car and just chilled there for a while. I reclined the driver seat all the way so I could kind of lie down, she had it reclined about halfway, and we just sat there talking for a while. I think this was a really good talk and I was able to connect with her a lot more emotionally. But eventually I moved into the back seat, and she followed me soon after.

We kissed for maybe 15 seconds, then I stopped. We didn’t for a while after that, but she seemed like she really wanted to make out, and I was feeling it too so I went in, which was a bad idea. We made out for a while, and I started getting really turned on. I had my hand on/under her bra, and moved her hand over my ****. She let her hand just rest there (didn’t do anything with it), and eventually I tried to move her hand under my pants, to which she said she didn’t want too.

After a few minutes of me asking her why not, her saying she couldn’t really describe why not, and me making jokes so that I didn’t come across as too sexually needy, she said that she felt uncomfortable and that we were going too fast. One thing I think I did wrong was that I told her that I answered her “what is this” question (when i agreed to be bf/gf), while I could have not answered, so she should answer my question when I asked why not do sexual stuff like that.

When she said she felt uncomfortable/we’re going too fast, I responded by saying that I felt that sexual stuff was a big part of relationships, that’s it something fun, pleasurable, intimate that we could do with each other. She then asked if being in car was intimate, and i laughed and said no. With that, I also told if we’re dating and into each other, why does there even have to be a thing such as going to fast. I asked her if it was because she was worried I was going to leave her if she gave up too easily, and I don’t remember exactly but I think she just said she was uncomfortable with it again. But I told her I wouldn’t force her to do anything she felt uncomfortable doing. Then we just kind of sat there for a little while, kissed for a few seconds, then just sat there again. Eventually I said let’s head back (it was getting late).

On the ride home we had a typical conversation. I was making jokes, she was laughing. When we got to her place, we kissed goodbye. Here is another place where I think made a big mistake. Whenever I kiss her goodbye, she comes with an open mouth, tongue french kiss thing. When saying goodbye, I just want a quick peck, not something like that. After her goodbye french kiss thing, I said “hold on one more thing,” and told her to make it just a peck instead of what she was doing. We kissed goodbye again with just a peck, and she just said “goodbye” and left. She didn’t seem too happy about that.

I think I really ****ed up by not listening to the advice. How can I correct my errors? I feel that I came across as only wanting her for sex, which obviously is something that isn’t good. Do I just ignore any sexual stuff for 2-3 weeks now? She showed very high interest level before. Never flaked, always excited to talk, etc., but I feel that may change now.

It's all good. When alone with a girl you're attracted to, being able to control the desire of not touching her is tough.

What you can do for about two - three days till you see her again is be "sweet".

Send her good morning messages not for convo but to wish her a good morning.

Good morning, hope your day is as awesome as you are.

She'd respond but dont carry on convo too long.



If you do see her. Touch/Kiss her but pull back and leave it at that for the night and just talk to her.

The next time after that, take her where you can fcuk her. Your car doesnt qualify.

stevo said:

Good morning, hope your day is as awesome as you are.
The next time after that, take her where you can fcuk her. Your car doesnt qualify.

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Hm. Is something like that not considered too beta though? I've never really texted a girl something like that so I'm not sure. I don't even text this girl that often. Only one or maybe two conversations a week

stevo said:

If you do see her. Touch/Kiss her but pull back and leave it at that for the night and just talk to her.

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I'll do this properly next time. Late in the week I'll set up that double date that she and her friend wanted to go on where there won't even much opportunity to kiss her a lot anyway.

pr3167 said:

Hm. Is something like that not considered too beta though? I've never really texted a girl something like that so I'm not sure. I don't even text this girl that often. Only one or maybe two conversations a week

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Betas get fcuked too.

To the point though, what you are doing with those text is deposit memory of you being less aggressive for pussie.

You're doing this two - three times only. One before you see her again (pull back date) Second before you try seks again. Third after the seks. Then let her come to daddy.

If she's supposed to be your girlfriend, how dont you guys speak often?

Deep down you might just want to smash and bounce, which is ok too but decide what you want.:yes:

pr3167 said:

I'll do this properly next time. Late in the week I'll set up that double date that she and her friend wanted to go on where there won't even much opportunity to kiss her a lot anyway.

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When you first see her, give her a peck on the lips or cheek.

During the date, tell the group something she did you liked to boost her confidence.

When date is over, pull her to the side, tell her you had a good time. Actually kiss her now for a good 3 seconds, tell her to have a good night. Ignite a fire inside her. Make her want you!

To the point though, what you are doing with those text is deposit memory of you being less aggressive for pussie.

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Ok I sent that text. It's weird for me b/c I've never been the guy to send messages like that but I should learn.

When date is over, pull her to the side, tell her you had a good time. Actually kiss her now for a good 3 seconds, tell her to have a good night. Ignite a fire inside her. Make her want you!

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Thanks for all the advice. I'll update in a week or so

Virgins are crazy, find better. Seriously. The time you spend trying to crack her legs open is so not worth it in the end if you're highly sexual. I'm not saying to date a wh0re, but some sexual desire in a girl is sexy, and it keeps you motivated. All these fresh virgins everyone's clamoring for? Keep em.

Keep this chick on the radar and get your nuts blown up by more sexually charged girl on the side. Your options are really limited. Good luck.

1. You cant be sure shes a virgin till you fvuck her. =>

2. **** her right in the pyssy anyway.

lol btw old people in my country say that if you fvuck a virgin you should merry her just a thought and its true you should deff not leave her after this

i agree with Ruler. as far as getting her really horny first. a girls intuition will go out the window when her panties start getting wet. The key might be to not just jump right in so to speak with your hands. Kiss her neck, nibble ears, caress nipples, grab her ass and start by just teasing her pvssy. slide your hand over it a few times (light pressure) while your hand is making its way back to familiar territory (titts/stomache/ass) Try putting just the tip of your finger just under her waste band of her panties. she has to get used to your hand being there and in close to her vag first. do this a few times and each time progress with a lil more pressure and get a little closer to the pu55y. once youre in the panties dont just go straight for the money. start from square one. touch the insides of her legs and move closer to the lips and everywhere but her puss. if you know she is wet then you can move in, but beware that her cl!t will be pretty sensitive if she is a virgin.