this girl has a boyfriend...

Boy do I have a story for you guys, but I'm gonna cut it as short as possible because I need some advice.

I'm 21, she's 19 (3 year long relationship with her bf). We start chatting a lot, I arranged a meet as soon as possible, she breaks up with her boyfriend (not because of me afaik), doesn't tell me, I find out from her friends, we hang out even more, I could've made a move in like 2 situations but I just wasn't confident she'd want me to at all at that point, and she suddenly gets back together with him. I start to distance myself because **** that ****, she keeps calling, texting, and damn I start to like her in the meantime so we text and hang out, I even sleep over with her and her roommates (platonically) until I got sick of it and told her our relationship needs to change or I don't want to stay in contact(implying I'm not her damn pet). She's upset, tells me she's not making a fool out of herself for no reason, she likes me a lot, but can't change the situation (for unknown reasons, she loves her bf I guess). So I go no contact on her, she texts after like 24 hours trying to get me to cave in, I don't, just told her we can keep in contact she needs to make up her mind after exams are over. Calls me over the next night, she finally cheats, after 3 days again, no sex not because of my lack of trying but because she's just that kind of girl I guess. She doesn't feel guilty more than she liked being with me, however she doesn't call me to come over anymore, because she feels guilty and actually wants something serious with me (like I'm not just a one night stand to her). We still keep in contact every day, flirting etc., but I don't think she's any closer to an answer, because she looooves her bf I guess, and supposedly likes me a lot and I fit her a lot better (her words).

What's the move here?

Get yourself a wife so you don't catch stds.

Get yourself a wife so you don't catch stds.

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Are you're implying she's a slut? I don't know man, sure it's an option, but she seems genuinely confused and stuff.

You like being played, don't you?

She's doing the drama queen/attention wh*re thing with you as a (willing) prop.

Enjoy!

Tictac said:

You like being played, don't you?

She's doing the drama queen/attention wh*re thing with you as a (willing) prop.

Enjoy!

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Thanks for the response, no I don't like being played, that's exactly why I let her know she's on a timer as far as these shenanigans go. Besides it's not the first time I'm in a situation where the girl "doesn't know what she wants" because of 2+ guys giving her attention at the same time.

Attention Whoring and triangulation at it's finest. She loves the fact that she has two guys showering her love and praise. She's playing a pretty good game she's beating you and her boyfriend into blithering betas.

If you do indeed pull her from her boyfriend, expect to always be looking over your shoulder at the next guy who's trying to make a move on her.

EJECT!!!! This woman is trouble.

If I were you, I would delete her number. At age 21, there are tons of hot women available that would be better suited for you to spend your time with.

expos said:

Attention Whoring and triangulation at it's finest. She loves the fact that she has two guys showering her love and praise. She's playing a pretty good game she's beating you and her boyfriend into blithering betas.

If you do indeed pull her from her boyfriend, expect to always be looking over your shoulder at the next guy who's trying to make a move on her.

EJECT!!!! This woman is trouble.

If I were you, I would delete her number. At age 21, there are tons of hot women available that would be better suited for you to spend your time with.

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Tbh I just want to bang her because it would be a tremendous waste of time and energy if it didn't happen at all. So any thoughts on how to accomplish that?

Reckoning said:

Tbh I just want to bang her because it would be a tremendous waste of time and energy if it didn't happen at all. So any thoughts on how to accomplish that?

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You are not going to bang her, she's leading you on and playing you as a beta orbiter pu$$y.

What the fvck do you think you are doing spending time with her platonically? Open your eyes. You're in the friend zone. Judge her by her actions not words. She's fvcking her boyfriend and using you as an emotional tampon on the side.

If you don't want to waste your time stop talking to her for the rest of your life.

You won't heed this advice because you haven't grown up yet. You will look back one day and realise how stupid and naive you were. It's OK, we've all been there and learned from it.

LMFAO said:

You are not going to bang her, she's leading you on and playing you as a beta orbiter pu$$y.

What the fvck do you think you are doing spending time with her platonically? Open your eyes. You're in the friend zone. Judge her by her actions not words. She's fvcking her boyfriend and using you as an emotional tampon on the side.

If you don't want to waste your time stop talking to her for the rest of your life.

You won't heed this advice because you haven't grown up yet. You will look back one day and realise how stupid and naive you were. It's OK, we've all been there and learned from it.

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I'm assuming you didn't read the entire first post, it's not platonic at this point at all, we got half naked 2 times making out for hours, she just didn't want to go all the way because of somewhat logical reasons (she didn't want to risk it for me to just ditch her right after). I don't get friendzoned anymore man, I'm not 16.

Reckoning said:

I'm assuming you didn't read the entire first post, it's not platonic at this point at all, we got half naked 2 times making out for hours, she just didn't want to go all the way because of somewhat logical reasons (she didn't want to risk it for me to just ditch her right after). I don't get friendzoned anymore man, I'm not 16.

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I didn't read it properly then, either that or didn't see the naked parts.

You can simply go for the LJBF speech if you really want to bang her. Go back to the same sort of situation. Just you and her no one else around at her place or yours. Invite her round. If she's giving you last minute resistance again then tell her if you can't get your hands off each other and have the right chemistry then it's best to be friends and you can introduce her to some of your friends. Be ready to walk away. She will then have to decide if she wants you or not, and if she does you'll be balls deep inside her within 10 minutes. Be prepared to walk away.

So play the reverse psychology "you're my friend" card. Doesn't sound too bad. I'll post the method applied and results during the following month, thanks!

Reckoning said:

So play the reverse psychology "you're my friend" card. Doesn't sound too bad. I'll post the method applied and results during the following month, thanks!

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Yes reverse psychology is a powerful tool but you have to be really prepared to take it or leave it, if you're faking it she'll be able to tell. I had LMR last week from a girl who I knew wanted to have sex with me but wanted me to invest (i.e. wait on several more dates). So I gave her that speech several times over. Also used a freeze out method, of just backing off and watching TV/texting, as she looked at me and wondered wtf I'm doing. I told her I'm going to leave right now, she was asking me if she's so expendable and told me she likes me and doesn't want me to leave. Basically completely flipped the script and got her to chase. In the end resulting in sex and she was loving every second of it.

So she's witholding sex and all the while still with her BF? Let her know very bluntly that while she is still in contact with him, you don't want to hear from her. Move on.

Move on, it's as simple as that! She ain't worth the hassle! Your 21, don't waste your time and effort on this, theres billions of other girls out there

"No contact while you have a boyfriend" is effective since 5 minutes ago. I've built quite a rapport with her, know from reliable sources she calls and texts me a lot more than she does her boyfriend. So I will post updates, if any.

Well the update is, she broke NC, due to not having a boyfriend anymore. I'm not sure who did the dumping, so I've been playing it kinda cool, as in "we broke up actually" "oh yeah, for how long, two weeks?"

The response to that was "no, we REALLY broke up".


I can definitely find out if it was her or him who initiated it (I think her best friend likes me, but she's otherwise engaged so she's kinda cheering for me in the whole situation, nothing but useful info from her so far).

Also there was a sort of noteworthy exchange, she said something about me being always displeased by the situation before and was like "we kissed, what more could you want" (it was a lot more, in bed and **** but sums it up kind of) and I said something like "yeah you're right, let's just be friends, it's enough honestly". After some off topic stuff she said yeah I accept that, and I was like ok cool. She said "really?". I said "we kissed, what more could you want, your words". Response was "I'm bleeding a lot right now, I can be forgiven, right?". I said "that's always your excuse for everything really".

It's kinda irrelevant but sheds some light I guess

Go out and meet someone single, you already know she's a slut... do you think the situation with you and her would be any different, do you want to be her boyfriend... come on man, get real?

Only weak *******s go after women in relationships, plus if I was her bf and found out about you, I'd smash your face in for being a c**t and in some countries you might end up taking a bullet to the brain.

If the girl is with someone, tell her to get in touch when she's single and move on, which actually means you'll look like a man.

Only weak *******s go after women in relationships, plus if I was her bf and found out about you, I'd smash your face in for being a c**t and in some countries you might end up taking a bullet to the brain.

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Yeah well, I'm up for that any time. I only came after her when they broke up and I made it none of my business to talk to her when she made up with her boyfriend the first time, she was borderline obnoxious about staying in contact with me no matter what and I couldn't care less either way back then so I started replying to messages after a while.

nemz said:

Only weak *******s go after women in relationships, plus if I was her bf and found out about you, I'd smash your face in for being a c**t and in some countries you might end up taking a bullet to the brain.

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Ever hear of alpha fvks beta bucks? You sound like the weak assh0le for fighting over a slut. No?