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God I hate weddings

backbreaker

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We have to go to my wife's best friend wedding this weekend and it reminds me just how much I hate weddings. I would have probably married my wife 2 years earlier if there were no wedding involved. I literally hate every.****ing.aspect. about weddings. I hate churches lol. I hate wedding dresses. I hate tuxedos. I hate the ****ty food they serve you. I hate the pageantry. I hate how you have 100-200 people at a place all pretending to be happy about some woman getting married. I hate having to sit awkwardly while the new wife and husband dance. I hate being around a bunch of people I dont know; in any situation. I'm not 100% intervened but I don't do well around 100s of people I just don't know. I hate having to sit next to your ****ing great aunt for 2 hours and pretend to have **** in common with her all so that the ****ing bride and groom can show off. I hate that if you are the best man you're expected to give a gift AND pay for the bachelor party. My wife's friend has had a bridal shower, a bachlorette party and now a wedding she's had to go to for the same ****ing person and gifts at all



****, i hated my own ****ing wedding lol. I love the **** out of some millie (my wife) but my god i hated my wedding lol. The only thing I liked about my wedding, besides seeing my wife in her wedding dress and knowing we were going to **** in it later that night lol which becuase we were so tired and i was so drunk, didn't happen) was the cake, which was pretty good. I had about 3 shots of vodka 30 mins before I walked down the isle. I told my wife look im not writing any ****ing speeches lol, i'm not doing anything super special, i'm in and i'm out like ****ing seal time six lol. I hated the first dance, becuase my wife is taller than me and had on heels so it was just awkward with 200 people looking at you, 80% of them which i'd never seen before. I hated the food. I hated conversing with people that don't give 2 ****s about me pretending they do lol. About half way through the reception i grabbed my little brother and was like dude go get the psp's an let's play madden, and we did just that, in the middle of a reception, my brother, me playing madden and my son sitting there eating cake lol.


and we got married on my birthday (june 17th) and like not any birthday, my 30th birthday. not one ****ing person told me happy birthday lol.

I did it all for my wie,, becuase it was her day and I wanted to have her day, but what made it all worse was SHE hated her wedding lol. the planning and **** was stressful. She spent all day talking to everyone and taking pictures and stuff and she's not that type of girl. I think I said all of 10 words to my wife during the reception.


It's not about the money,, it's not about the government contract, its' the wedding. they ****ing suck. I hate them


If for some reason I ever do get married again, which i hope doesn't happen, but if it does I will literally just have a BBQ in my back yard, or on the beach, probably the beach, it will be informal as hell and everyone will be playing spades and drinking wine coolers and ****. Thats my dream weddinglol
 

Desdinova

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I hate other peoples' weddings. The ceremony is the worst part. Listening to stories about the bride and groom is the second worst part. Not only that, weddings just seem to be incredibly outdated and archaic. It was a reason to celebrate back when women were treated like property and stayed married. Now it's just an item on a woman's bucket list; a day for her to be an attention wh0re.

But unlike you, my wedding was fantastic. It was literally the best party I'd ever been to. We kept the speech and vows short. The rest was all about having way too much food to be consumed and having fun. I'd love to fake another wedding just to have a big ass party like that again.
 

LiveFreeX

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My wife and I LOVE attending other people's weddings. We eat everything in sight, hog the dance floor and get pissed up at the bar... its the only time we ever really do that.

With the current exchange rate:

My wedding? $0.00
My debt from the wedding? $0.00
My marriage ceremony? $2.75
My honeymoon? Dinner at Pizza Hut, paid for by my mom.

I absolutely LOVE rubbing that in to people's faces. They look at my wife, look at me and are completely puzzled as to how I could get my wife to agree to it. I told my wife that she could either have a really nice wedding or a house/car/nice dresses and a great life. Obviously if my wife had picked the wedding, I'd have kicked her ass to the curb. I'm also not shy about telling people this. I relish the disgusted looks people give me, especially when they tell me I'm a terrible husband. I tell them, I'm great to my wife, the sex life is absolutely amazing and my wife is ALLOWED to have anything she wants off the dollar menu at McD's. ;)

OH how I love weddings. I always make a speech and I'm always the 'Oh my god, did he just say that' guy. I'm the worst dressed person there with the best dance moves and the hottest wife. I make weddings memorable, I'm a wedding crasher. :flowers:
 

samspade

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LiveFreeX said:
My wife and I LOVE attending other people's weddings. We eat everything in sight, hog the dance floor and get pissed up at the bar... its the only time we ever really do that.

With the current exchange rate:

My wedding? $0.00
My debt from the wedding? $0.00
My marriage ceremony? $2.75
My honeymoon? Dinner at Pizza Hut, paid for by my mom.

I absolutely LOVE rubbing that in to people's faces. They look at my wife, look at me and are completely puzzled as to how I could get my wife to agree to it. I told my wife that she could either have a really nice wedding or a house/car/nice dresses and a great life. Obviously if my wife had picked the wedding, I'd have kicked her ass to the curb. I'm also not shy about telling people this. I relish the disgusted looks people give me, especially when they tell me I'm a terrible husband. I tell them, I'm great to my wife, the sex life is absolutely amazing and my wife is ALLOWED to have anything she wants off the dollar menu at McD's. ;)
Well done. This is what needs to be happening more. I paid around $35 to get married at city hall. No engagement ring. We got simple wedding bands - she got my grandmother's. Had a nice meal with friends afterward at a cheap middle eastern restaurant. Threw a couple of parties at home for friends and that was it. Not once did my then-wife demand anything more.

LiveFreeX, I love the Pizza Hut part. What it means is your wife wants YOU and not a glorified quinciñera. Others may feign disgust but they're secretly jealous because not every man lets his woman run amok with wedding frivolities. Let the bedraggled husks and their beta boys take all the offense in the world!
 

FairShake

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I was married in a past life and it didn't really end well but I find the idea of spending a wedding at Pizza Hut, a cheap Middle Eastern restaurant, or city hall kind of sad. I wouldn't even take a friend to Pizza Hut for their birthday let alone a wedding!

She and I had too many friends and too close a family for that to happen! :crackup:

We did the do in my dad's Carpenter's Union hall ballroom for next to nothing really, had family cook up great meals, the first and last time I dressed in a suit, and danced to an oldies DJ. No flash just fun. And I was king for a day.

PS: We actually made money on our wedding.
 

Slickster

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I love going to weddings!

Food, drinks, music, dancing, and hopefully some cuties dressed up all pretty.

Back when I was single weddings were a great place to meet new chicks and hook up.

TIP: Be bold. Get Grandma or ol' Aunt Ethel up dancing and grooving and you will have your choice of single women in the place.
 

glass half full

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someone should show up at weddings with a boom box, belting out Queen's "Another one Bites The Dust" lol
 

Darth

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I went to a wedding earlier this month. I didn't like the music so I didn't dance. Still got things to happen with women at my table.

I don't hate weddings but I don't especially care for them.
 

backbreaker

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I mean as far as weddings go, mine was the best i've evver been to. I paid a good grip for my wedding. It was in this beautiful old church right outside London that my wife went to as a child. I just dont' ****ing like weddings lol.


I don't know if it was because i was pretty tipsy, but i remember walking being in the actual ceremony and i was humming ken street fighter theme in my head for some odd reason and started chuckling lol. i was that ****ing uninterested in the wedding. doooom. du doo doo doo doo doooooooo. i'd learn to play the guitar just to play that one song it's so ****ing awesome lol
 

backbreaker

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another thing i hate about weddings is the financial strain it puts on everyone else.

we had our wedding overseas. we were going to be out of it either way, either by shipping her people here, or shipping my people there, there was no way around it, we chose there as it would cost less to send me mom, 2 brothers, sister, uncle, 4 cousins, 2 grandmoms and her 3 best friends there than it would cost to send about 30 of her people here and that still would have been about half of the people she wanted there.

it cost me give or take 3,200 a head to ship everyone overseas. I spent more on transportation and hotels than I did on the actual wedding


my wife's best friend is from North Carolina originally and a **** load of her family had to fly out, pay for rooms and **** out of their own pocket just to attend. the groom is from washington state and same with him. i would imagine flying to and from LA, hotel in LA, spending money while in LA that's every bit of 2-3k at least. that's not including your wedding gift(s) and ****.


weddings can be a really big financial strain on everyone else besides you especially if you are not from where you're being married
 

mangotot

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The only thing I hate about weddings is, others asking "why aren't you married"?
 

backbreaker

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even better than that lol, going to other people's weddings with your GF and having everyone ask you "so when are you getting married"
 
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