I got lots of advice for you depending on what you want for an outcome.
Couple questions.
How long married?
Who is the OM?
How did they meet?
How did you find out? Do you have proof? If not get some.
How many kids if any?
What kind of snooping tools do you have in place?
Make sure your not confronting her yet.. No angry outbursts, stay calm and collected.
What are your wifes emotional needs?
What are your emotional needs?
What is it your wife doesn't like about you? (According to her)
How much time do you spend together acting as a couple without the distraction of kids,friends,family?
So many factors.
Let me know what you want out of your marriage and I can help you. Please explain your entire situation as detailed as you can without names or job locations.
Epi