The kino stalemate

So I'm back, now living in Los Angeles and very, very happy to be single out here.

Since I don't know people outside of work, I tried out online dating (okcupid). While it's rather easy for me to get first dates and more with 4's and 5's, it's my dates with the 6 - 8s. Crash and burn.

I've been testing out this theory that we should wait for the woman to kino first. Well, most will be more than willing to hug me or initiate a hug at the start of the date, but during the date they don't initiate any kino. What gives? I'm myself, personable and most women seem to be having a good time (or are great actresses... not dating anyone in the industry, though). They'll have their one drink, we'll talk for an hour or two and generally, that's it. Holy crap do first date internet dates suck.

I've bucked this trend and tried out the kino first technique on one or two and although they had no problems with it, they didn't really reciprocate.

Any advice on kino would be appreciated. It has gotten to the point where I've had about a dozen first dates and maybe a few second dates and 3 lays. I'm short (5'7) but it hasn't impacted me that much online as I'm successful and attractive, but I know I can much more easily meet girls in person. I took down the okc profile and figure that it'd be a lot easier to game in person and know right away where I would like to take things and judge her interest accordingly. But this kino first stuff is really annoying me.

-t

I do it with money, make it into a running joke. When standing and walking, they pick up their purse and look through it (or just out of the blue), I stick out my hand and say "gimme some!" They will usually "give me five" at that point, then "I don't want to hold your hand, I want MONEY money money money!" Then I will smile and tweak their elbow. They will do the playful arm punch usually. Then I will put my arm around them and squeeze them to me for a second and release, "OK you can keep the money, gimme some SUGAR! sugarsugarsugar!" If said within earshot of others, they will usually laugh. When they are blushing and rolling their eyes, you have won that round, pull back and wait for them to initiate the next kino round. If they don't, start up again in a few minutes. They almost always reciprocate the foolishness if there's any attraction there at all.

Sitting at the bar. "Your drink looks better than mine, let's trade," then take their drink and keep yours too. Start drinking their drink, "damn that's good! mmmmm." Ham it up. If there is any attraction there, that will get the kino ball rolling as she reaches for her or your drink grab her hand, "I really just wanted an excuse to hold your hand." Put her hand and yours on her thigh and then lean over and lightly bump her shoulder with yours. Hold her hand for a 10- 30 seconds and then release, break the plane back and maintain it until she breaks it.

When anywhere, "which one of those X things is your favorite?" When they point, grab their hand "don't point! I can't take you anywhere!" Then go into the just wanted an excuse to hold their hand. "I thought you didn't want to hold my hand." "Well I changed my mind."

There are all kinds of silly games to play with food, drink, sunglasses, whatever, to get the kino ball rolling. The less self-conscious and more playful you can be about it, the better. Good luck.

EDIT: Most important thing is maximizing the time when it's easy to touch each other, walking standing, and minimize the time when it isn't, sitting across a table or out of arm's reach. You want 80%+ of the date to be in arm's reach.

Dear Traveller,
You will grow Old and Grey waiting for Women to initiate action...Who on Earth encouraged you to that belief?no one here that's for sure...Women want to be wooed and seduced!

Yeah. No matter how great your "inner game" is, women will not collapse in a puddle of their own juices upon the mere sight of you.

Meaning, it's nice if they show high interest, but some girls are just passive (and still interested)! Too many on this board try to read "signs" and "indicators", without actually testing the waters themselves.