What's really behind a mid-life crisis

I think most of us can agree that the term "mid-life crisis" is essentially a shaming word invented by women. This term generally applies to men who are at the peak of their earning potential. It's such an important time in a man's life that women had to invent a special shaming word to describe it.

We all know about it from the man's perspective...but think about it for a moment, the big question is why was the term invented?

Well, what happens with a mid-life crisis on the female side?

1) The woman is losing value year after year and still believing she can have it all and seems oblivious to the fact her man's value is increasing year after year.

2) The woman in the relationship is completely oblivious to the fact more of her competition is taking an interest in her man's growing value to provide resources.

3) The woman is approaching menopause or already hit it and her libido is not doing so well.

So....I would argue the answer to the question of why it's a shaming word is to hide the true nature of women to BOTH men and women. To make women look good in the best possible light.

The answer is to hide:

1) the whole nature of menopause
2) how vicious women can get with each other when competing for a man with high value and lot's of resources

So, to make women look good, blame the man. This is a good example of female sneakiness and logic, I think.

A good write-up and essentially summarizes my thoughts on this matter too. It's interesting to watch women in various stages of their life when they realize at different points that the world (ie: men) don't cater to their every whim anymore. It happens at different points, such as a girl being a b!tch in a club at 20, or a woman hitting the wall at 30, loss of sex drive and menopause at 40 as examples.

All the while if their attitude toward people, men, being much more generous, receptive and polite....well, a woman with that quality seems pretty rare sometimes.

I'd say I'm going through a mid-life crisis, but it has nothing to do with women. I'm attempting to maximize my career without a real path, and that is frustrating. All the while, the idiocy of the country and world right now can't help but make you cynical about the future.

As much as a 50yrs old man is not slightly comparable to a 50yrs old woman in terms of value, we have to stop to bullsh1t ourselves.

No matter how rich you are at 50 or how good is your work, there is no chance except for super rich and famous men to get a 20yrs old girl, and even if you manage is not out of physical attraction, we can still score a good looking 30-35 yrs old girl, but the times of those horny tipsy teen are gone for most of us.

Its not about society, shaming or culture but about basic attraction, unless you look 20yrs old younger she aint gonna feel that raw natural desire toward you.

Now regarding middle aged women I agree with Op, except for those who managed to have a loving family, a decent man and some kids coupled with a satisfactory career and a good shape, those women are probably much more relaxed and happy than a hot 20 yrs old girl.

They managed to get what they needed and are happy that they no longer risk anything.

Regarding our average feminist entitled woman, being 50 and virtually having no worth or power over man its enough to drive me crazy or depressed, there are no such things as man prostitutes for them either, first cause very few men do it, second cause they can buy a body for half an hour but they cant buy genuine validation which they crave.

bmp2cpm said:

2) how vicious women can get with each other when competing for a man with high value and lot's of resources

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I'm always stating that women are viciously competitive with each other, and this certainly does occur when a high value man is in the vicinity. It also happens when there's 5hit on sale at Wal-Mart.

However, I don't think women are intentionally hiding anything. They've simply come up with a "logical" explanation for the peak of a man's value. Women don't think all that deeply about things. They certainly fantasize and dream things up, but that's not the same as thinking deeply.

You won't hear car or boat dealers or manufacturers ever uttering the phrase "midlife crisis." You will hear most of the rest of marketers advertising it and salting it into all media.

All you need to know to understand is this:

Very few men will buy a $100 30 day jar of face cream no matter how much money they have.

Ef 'em all. When I DECIDE to buy the sports car I never had while raising kids, or do the things I couldn't do when I had little kids.... I haven't changed, but my priorities have Time for ME again.

If you are in good shape and have been preparing for middle age via pursuing the notion of agelessness (buying clothes that stay in style, cars that can be driven by people of any age (if you buy a 2002 Supra and you are 55 thats lame), and staying abreast of trends while solidifying your knowledge of the world, you will come out resembling that player who almost closed Nicole Kidman at that party in the beginning of Eyes Wide Shut instead of an ex minivan soccer dad now driving a 2002 Supra (listening to Drake) and wearing tight jeans and a baseball cap to hide the bald spot while revving the engine in a QFC parking lot every time a hot girl walks out.

Who Dares Win said:

As much as a 50yrs old man is not slightly comparable to a 50yrs old woman in terms of value, we have to stop to bullsh1t ourselves.

No matter how rich you are at 50 or how good is your work, there is no chance except for super rich and famous men to get a 20yrs old girl, and even if you manage is not out of physical attraction, we can still score a good looking 30-35 yrs old girl, but the times of those horny tipsy teen are gone for most of us.

Its not about society, shaming or culture but about basic attraction, unless you look 20yrs old younger she aint gonna feel that raw natural desire toward you.

Now regarding middle aged women I agree with Op, except for those who managed to have a loving family, a decent man and some kids coupled with a satisfactory career and a good shape, those women are probably much more relaxed and happy than a hot 20 yrs old girl.

They managed to get what they needed and are happy that they no longer risk anything.

Regarding our average feminist entitled woman, being 50 and virtually having no worth or power over man its enough to drive me crazy or depressed, there are no such things as man prostitutes for them either, first cause very few men do it, second cause they can buy a body for half an hour but they cant buy genuine validation which they crave.

Click to expand...

No such thing as mid-life crisis... it is mid-life awareness.

One day a man wakes up, sees the miserable schrew laying next to him, victim of b1tchy beta shaming for a year in an effort to keep him under control, and something snaps. It is the realization that HIS market value is high in his late 30s, while his wife, also in her late 30s, has dropped and is dropping like a stone.

A woman in her late 30s comes to the realization that who she is as a person is not enough to get the validation she craves. ANY MAN that comes along and gives her even a tiny bit of this validation, she melts.

This happens to me all the time with women in their late 30s early 40s. Any true DJ just walks around putting out a "let's fvck" vibe and is friendly. Do this with a married women in her late 30s and early 40s and it's all you can do to keep them off you. I have 3 of them chasing me now... It woudl take absolutely no effort to pull these women, but I do not want unecessary drama in my life with married women.

Dear BMP,
Menopause is such a destructive time for Families....Just what cracks inside their little heads I am blessed if I know....They just want out,they don't know what they want but it sure isn't what they have....However to suggest that a fifty year Old Woman has trouble finding a very good partner is completely wrong,but sadly they just lose interest.

I've always thought a guy going through a mid-life crisis was a guy that wakes up between his late 30's to late 40's, and realizes the following:

- He hasn't been committing much to chasing his passions, dreams and investing as much as he can in his career progressions.

- He didn't take the "risks" that he wish he took "back in the day".

- He's a fat piece of shyt

- His finances aren't where they should be for a guy his age.

- If he's dating, it's to a fat piece of shyt chick or he's not getting the chicks he wished he wanted.

Basically it's a guy that had no direction ALL OF THIS TIME, and now he's finally waking up to the fact that he didn't do what my boy Pook said which was to: "Invest his time, rather than Spend his time."

It was a mid life crisis of sorts that led me to find this forum. It mostly just consisted of "Wow, I'm about to turn 49. I'm going to be 50 soon, are women just going to see me as an old man now?". Then I came here and I was told that mid life crises didn't really exist, they were just made up by females as a means to shame men. Lol.