Chick Refuses to Initiate contact

Bingo-Player · Dec 15, 2014

a girl Im working on just will not initiate contact with me and its annoying me ,

the thing is if i text her or whatever then she replies within minutes every single time and we usually have a good conversation

i don't think her interest is that low or she would be playing games with her texts so i don't understand what the problem is

any ideas?

sylvester the cat · Dec 15, 2014

Bingo-Player said:
a girl Im working on just will not initiate contact with me and its annoying me ,

stop initiating then. see what she does.

if you cannot stop initiating for fear of losing her then you have already lost.

Bingo-Player · Dec 15, 2014

hmmmmm good point

not so much bothered about losing her , I'm annoyed because i don't know WHY she won't , which in turn is getting my hamster spinning

LMFAO · Dec 15, 2014

If you haven't fvcked her yet then never expect too much. Many girls don't initiate in those stages and expect the men to do it all. Simply ask her out on a date, and get her to invest i.e. fvck her. Once you fvck her everything changes, and she will be initiating.

om1xr · Dec 15, 2014

Ask her out. Be Awesome. Be Gone. Don't care about the next date, fvck..etc. That's the real game imo!

To do that you should have the mentality of living in the present moment and by doing that you will have abundance mentality and whatever other DJ qualities that you may think of. you wouldn't care about who initiate contact, you wouldn't care if she flakes, you wouldn't care if she rejected you...etc.

the quick solution is to just not focus your attention on those stupid thoughts and just let go of them! the real skill is to be able of letting go of the thoughts or feelings that annoy you, make your hamster spin like a muddafaquerr

pyros · Dec 15, 2014

if she doesnt initiate her interest level is very low.

Nothing else to add.

Bingo-Player · Dec 15, 2014

not true pyros

if you took that attitude towards every single chick you met i very much doubt you would ever get laid

as LMFAO says above unless you've banged a chick you cannot expect her to initiate especially if she is high quality

i have a gut feeling about this chick , she's interested but somethings holding her back

going to cut all contact now down to face to face

will be seeing her boxing day at a social event so we will see what happens

GS750 · Dec 15, 2014

In the beginning she should be initiating at least some of the time. I'd take this as low interest and move along.

VladPatton · Dec 15, 2014

Both parties have to show and express interest, even if it is not 50/50. It should be something, not a complete zero. If you have to chase, chase, chase all the time it gets exhausting and you give up because you're not getting any feedback. You may as well be gaming a statue at that point.

Experiment by stopping for a week or two and see what happens.

G_Govan · Dec 16, 2014

Bingo-Player said:
not true pyros

if you took that attitude towards every single chick you met i very much doubt you would ever get laid

as LMFAO says above unless you've banged a chick you cannot expect her to initiate especially if she is high quality

i have a gut feeling about this chick , she's interested but somethings holding her back

going to cut all contact now down to face to face

will be seeing her boxing day at a social event so we will see what happens

I happen to agree with him, that is if one does not enjoy chasing women who like controlling the frame. Its one thing to get a nonresponse sometimes, we all get busy. However, to never initiate contact is always a bad sign.

Zarky · Dec 16, 2014

Bingo-Player said:
not so much bothered about losing her , I'm annoyed because i don't know WHY she won't , which in turn is getting my hamster spinning

Some women just don't. Some women are just extremely passive and, no matter how interested in the guy they are, they simply won't initiate.

I personally find those types to be extremely dull, so I don't bother with them. There's no give and take, it's all you giving. She's just along for the ride and that bores me real fast.

I have "tests" where I stop initiating sometimes and wait for her to. If she doesn't, she falls off my radar and that's it.

pyros · Dec 16, 2014

Zarky said:
Some women just don't. Some women are just extremely passive and, no matter how interested in the guy they are, they simply won't initiate.

I personally find those types to be extremely dull, so I don't bother with them. There's no give and take, it's all you giving. She's just along for the ride and that bores me real fast.

I have "tests" where I stop initiating sometimes and wait for her to. If she doesn't, she falls off my radar and that's it.

In my experience girls that do not text you and do not contact you from time to time, and the ones that do not contact you after you've gone no contact to see their reaction, are 95% of the time NOT INTERESTED IN YOU. It is not that they are 'shy' or 'dull', if they do not initiate after...1 or 2 dates max, they are not into you and you're wasting your time.

Easy as that.

SeymourCake · Dec 16, 2014

You're showing signs clinginess and desperation. She probably senses this. Go get a hobby and occupy your mind with something.

Huffman · Dec 16, 2014

pyros said:
It is not that they are 'shy' or 'dull', if they do not initiate after...1 or 2 dates max, they are not into you and you're wasting your time.

We like to think they are dull, because that way we can preserve our fragile egos

mangotot · Dec 17, 2014

Try spinning plates if this ones does not go anywhere.

mangotot · Dec 17, 2014

Try spinning plates if this ones does not go anywhere.

mangotot · Dec 17, 2014

Try spinning plates if this ones does not go anywhere.

Comatozed · Dec 17, 2014

I think the play here is to put her to action. She's responding to your texts. Great. But little investment.

Ask her out. Then you will know.

Bingo-Player · Dec 17, 2014

Hmmm a mixed bag of opinions

I think everyone is in agreement that i shouldn’t be contacting her via media for a while unless she initiates

however I disagree point blank with the theory that if she doesn’t initate she ISNT interested

Unfortunately what you have these days is lots of dating advice media telling both men AND women NOT to initiate contact to maintain an air of mystery and keep the other party interested

What you then have from both sexes is a stalemate , in the early stages of a relationship i think a smart woman would only initiate contact as a last resort due to keeping options open and not wanting to come across as needy

You also have the same attitude from in the know men like ourselves

can we do a lot about this ? .....well no not really people have become wise to the power that comes with dating and nobody wants to come off as too “needy”

sometimes you just got to trust your gut , if she’s replying promptly and adding to the conversation you cannot confirm a low interest level

anyway il see what happens when i see her in person

pyros · Dec 17, 2014

Bingo-Player said:
Hmmm a mixed bag of opinions

I think everyone is in agreement that i shouldn’t be contacting her via media for a while unless she initiates

however I disagree point blank with the theory that if she doesn’t initate she ISNT interested

Unfortunately what you have these days is lots of dating advice media telling both men AND women NOT to initiate contact to maintain an air of mystery and keep the other party interested

What you then have from both sexes is a stalemate , in the early stages of a relationship i think a smart woman would only initiate contact as a last resort due to keeping options open and not wanting to come across as needy

You also have the same attitude from in the know men like ourselves

can we do a lot about this ? .....well no not really people have become wise to the power that comes with dating and nobody wants to come off as too “needy”

sometimes you just got to trust your gut , if she’s replying promptly and adding to the conversation you cannot confirm a low interest level

anyway il see what happens when i see her in person

It seems you're a bit stubborn.

We all agree that unless she's really interested, she's not gonna contact you first in the begining. By begining I mean: BEFORE YOUR FIRST OR SECOND DATE.

If after this time she doesnt initiate contact, SHE IS MORE THAN LIKELY NOT INTO YOU or SHE'S A DAMN MANIPULATOR or SHE'S SEING SOME OTHER GUY, or ALL OF THIS TOGETHER. In either case she's not worth it cause the amount of trouble she'll give you is too much.

Yes, there could be one girl out of 100 that eventhough she likes you a lot doesnt initiate contact, but that is a very rare exception. If they're interested, from medium interest to high, they cannot resist to contact you, text you, send you emoticons, send you pictures...etc. That is how it works.

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