What happened to BeDJ?

Die Hard · Aug 26, 2014

He was still here last week, now it looks like he is banned? What's the story?

Jaylan · Aug 26, 2014

If he did get banned, it would show this forum to have sporadic moderation practices given the posters that are allowed to continue posting here on this board. Because BeDJ is definitely more tame than some of the trolls that have been allowed to fester on SS for years.

Though usually when someone gets banned, it simply says "banned" under their name. His profile seems completely removed from the board...so who knows.

EDIT: Thanks to the other guys for updating us. Its easy to see why he got tired of this place. Though I have a feeling he will be back in the future. I thought it was a ban at first since its happened to him before. But its good if he's moving on with himself. Some guys just outgrow the forum and move on. I wish him well.

Peaks&Valleys · Aug 26, 2014

Huh.

Yes, would someone (MOD) care to share?

TheVirtualMind · Aug 26, 2014

Sometimes people PM a mod or the admin and ask for their profile to be deleted for whatever reason (tired of being here, someone found out who they are on here, ect).

Peaks&Valleys · Aug 26, 2014

TheVirtualMind said:
Sometimes people PM a mod or the admin and ask for their profile to be deleted for whatever reason (tired of being here, someone found out who they are on here, ect).

Gotcha. Thanks.

backbreaker · Aug 26, 2014

he sent me a PM about a week ago that sounded like he was about to do something like this. he doesn't like the direction of the forum. I thnk he just left.

AAAgent · Aug 26, 2014

BeDJ left. He sent me a PM saying he didn't like the way this forum was turning and basically sounded like he found no interest in contributing to the forum. He deactivated his account and left. I sort of agree with him as well and basically have restricted myself to the Anything Else and fitness sections.

We rarely have anyone posting field reports or trying to go out in the field of trying to improve their chances with women. This used to be a forum for self improvement, now it just seems people are here to rant and talk about random topics of self interest.

zekko · Aug 27, 2014

AAAgent said:
We rarely have anyone posting field reports or trying to go out in the field of trying to improve their chances with women. This used to be a forum for self improvement, now it just seems people are here to rant and talk about random topics of self interest.

This is my overall impression of the general attitude of the forum right now:

You can work hard to improve your game, but really, women simply aren't worth it.

Specifically modern women. I don't even think that's a bad attitude, necessarily. I think we probably all agree that different guys will have to put in different amounts of work to get good with women, depending on what they have to work with.

I've never said I'm great with women, but I know i can always get a girl. You hear about guys saying you have to put in three years in the clubs, or go to clubs six nights a week before you can really get good game. Honestly, if I had to try that hard, I doubt that I would consider it worth it either. Things like working out are different, because that benefits you in other ways than just to please women.

Attraction between men and women is a natural thing. If I had to go through a checklist of like 40 different things that you have to do to attract a woman (as opposed to a few general principles), I might be tempted to say "fvck this" too.

AAAgent · Aug 27, 2014

zekko said:
This is my overall impression of the general attitude of the forum right now:

You can work hard to improve your game, but really, women simply aren't worth it.

Specifically modern women. I don't even think that's a bad attitude, necessarily. I think we probably all agree that different guys will have to put in different amounts of work to get good with women, depending on what they have to work with.

I've never said I'm great with women, but I know i can always get a girl. You hear about guys saying you have to put in three years in the clubs, or go to clubs six nights a week before you can really get good game. Honestly, if I had to try that hard, I doubt that I would consider it worth it either. Things like working out are different, because that benefits you in other ways than just to please women.

Attraction between men and women is a natural thing. If I had to go through a checklist of like 40 different things that you have to do to attract a woman (as opposed to a few general principles), I might be tempted to say "fvck this" too.

That's why i hate gaming at clubs. Sure it's easier if your game is good because they're drunk and many of those girls aren't the brightest. I'd rather and prefer gaming during the day out in public. It's more exhilarating and find better quality/faster. If i wanted to bang, i'd prefer bar scene since I really don't dance much and i'm not the greatest bs'er. I also come from 2 larger cities so it's easier to meet people but the mall and just out randomly doing your shopping/chores is the best way to meet chicks. Bootcamp really helps as well. BeDJ was a good example of gaming in everyday settings, although he did game a lot out drinking/drunk too but hey, if you got the funny conversationalist vibe going for you, use it.

speed dawg · Aug 27, 2014

Die Hard said:
He was still here last week, now it looks like he is banned? What's the story?

BeDJ is a known troll. He needed banning, if that is in fact what happened. He's admitted it plenty of times in troll PMs to me.

Jaylan said:
If he did get banned, it would show this forum to have sporadic moderation practices given the posters that are allowed to continue posting here on this board. Because BeDJ is definitely more tame than some of the trolls that have been allowed to fester on SS for years.

Though usually when someone gets banned, it simply says "banned" under their name. His profile seems completely removed from the board...so who knows.

EDIT: Thanks to the other guys for updating us. Its easy to see why he got tired of this place. Though I have a feeling he will be back in the future. I thought it was a ban at first since its happened to him before. But its good if he's moving on with himself. Some guys just outgrow the forum and move on. I wish him well.

As if you have any clout in which to speak on this forum's matters, from an elevated position. You are one of the worst posters this board has ever seen, outside the spam-bots and Jariel.

Colossus · Aug 27, 2014

I'm inclined to agree with zekko; I think the general theme of this forum is going more towards the MGTOW (men going their own way) philosophy, which basically amounts to "women arent worth it, do you own thing, fvck the world."

I think the greater dating culture and mating arena has changed and the golden era of Pook and Anti-Dump is long over. Beyond that, many of the veteran posters here have either married and moved on or just tired of the forum and faded into the archives.

Jaylan · Aug 27, 2014

speed dawg said:
BeDJ is a known troll. He needed banning, if that is in fact what happened. He's admitted it plenty of times in troll PMs to me.

As if you have any clout in which to speak on this forum's matters, from an elevated position. You are one of the worst posters this board has ever seen, outside the spam-bots and Jariel.

Speaking of known trolls...

Colossus said:
I'm inclined to agree with zekko; I think the general theme of this forum is going more towards the MGTOW (men going their own way) philosophy, which basically amounts to "women arent worth it, do you own thing, fvck the world."

I think the greater dating culture and mating arena has changed and the golden era of Pook and Anti-Dump is long over. Beyond that, many of the veteran posters here have either married and moved on or just tired of the forum and faded into the archives.

And this shouldnt be happening. Sosuave forums should be about bedding women, and becoming better at interpersonal relationships with women. The forums should be about this because all the information on the main website is about that.

And I cant say the greater dating culture and mating arena has become men saying the kind of stuff MGTOW say. At least this is not what I see in the real world around me, or on other dating oriented forums. Its just that Sosuave has been polluted by many dudes who dont want to or just cant become better with women. And its also that the successful guys here have nothing here that encourages them to discuss their romantic lives any more.

I think that many of us who have been here a while, myself included, need to make a concerted effort in steering this place back into a place where guys share more positive ideas and experiences toward the goal of being better with women. I gotta admit that I have stopped talking about my personal life on the forums I use online, sort of as a precaution of people who know me reading stuff I say. But Ill start talking some more real world experience posts again. This forum needs more discussion of real world action.

Chronocidal · Aug 27, 2014

Not that I am a moderator or anything, but I have no problem with the discussions going places other than solely about PU (at least in the Anything Else forum which presumably is for such topics), though I personally do find all the race-baiting threads annoying. (And this is as someone who doesn't have a dog in those fights.)

I haven't posted much action-related stuff these days, but that's mainly due to other issues becoming more urgent priorities. Hopefully that'll change in a while.

( . )( . ) · Aug 27, 2014

Colossus said:
I'm inclined to agree with zekko; I think the general theme of this forum is going more towards the MGTOW (men going their own way) philosophy, which basically amounts to "women arent worth it, do you own thing, fvck the world."

I think the greater dating culture and mating arena has changed and the golden era of Pook and Anti-Dump is long over. Beyond that, many of the veteran posters here have either married and moved on or just tired of the forum and faded into the archives.

QFT

It's just how the sexual market is now. I'm not trying to be an ass but the majority of men who come here will quite literally never even come across that 1 in 100 woman. Unless he looks abroad his chances are just too slim of even meeting more than a P&D. It's sad that most younger fellas are pretty much now limited with bar hopping, facebooking, tatts, brats, cats, and fats as their only options. The upside I guess is do you even miss what you never experienced in the first place? Are the under 25-ish? dudes even consciously aware something is not quite right? How can you be if you've only ever been told women used to be different?

Desdinova · Aug 27, 2014

Colossus said:
I'm inclined to agree with zekko; I think the general theme of this forum is going more towards the MGTOW (men going their own way) philosophy, which basically amounts to "women arent worth it, do you own thing, fvck the world."

I think the greater dating culture and mating arena has changed and the golden era of Pook and Anti-Dump is long over. Beyond that, many of the veteran posters here have either married and moved on or just tired of the forum and faded into the archives.

I've been here since 2001 and have seen the theme of the forum progress through many changes. The main thing is the forum has progressed with the themes discussed. We haven't always been stuck on Mystery Method or MGTOW. Back in 2001, it was mostly Speed Seduction vs all the elements of the PUA. However, the element that has always remained constant is self-improvement. Basically, PUA + Self-Improvement = Don Juan.

MGTOW is just the current fad of the forum. It may settle in the future, but I'm not sure it will ever go away. Before MGTOW, the biggest subject of the forum was feminism. Again, it's progression. This progression has helped expand the collective knowledge of the forum, and has therefore helped us progressed in our own knowledge about life, human interaction, social influence, and how to seduce women.

There's a lot of people who come on here that say the forum is 5hit as opposed to the golden Pook years, but the information on the forum is still progressing, and IMO it's been progressing in a good way. That's why I'm still here.

samspade · Aug 28, 2014

Desdinova said:
MGTOW is just the current fad of the forum. It may settle in the future, but I'm not sure it will ever go away. Before MGTOW, the biggest subject of the forum was feminism. Again, it's progression. This progression has helped expand the collective knowledge of the forum, and has therefore helped us progressed in our own knowledge about life, human interaction, social influence, and how to seduce women.

Agreed. The reason MGTOW is the current trend is because the nature of the internet has changed over the past two decades. It used to be a place where one looked up stuff. Now it's a forum for everyone with an opinion and a mouthpiece. It's a place for people to exercise righteous indignation and anger moreso than search for knowledge and data.

I found this site 14 years ago under the search "how to ask out a girl on a date." Imagine that. I wonder how many men find it today Googling "feminism is bullshyt" or "why are American women such slvts." Don't get me wrong - cultural issues are relevant and it's healthy to bytch - but I'll always prefer the self-help nature of this forum. As bad as the female situation is in the West, I also think men are poisoning their minds with garbage websites (on both sides of the issue) that do nothing but ramp up the vitriol over men vs. women so they can get more clicks.

Long story short, you will make yourself happier much faster with self-improvement than by trying to change the entire West via angry comments online. There'll be plenty of the same problems long after you're dead, but will YOU have had a fulfilling life (including with women)? Think about it.

Who Dares Win · Aug 28, 2014

samspade said:
Agreed. The reason MGTOW is the current trend is because the nature of the internet has changed over the past two decades. It used to be a place where one looked up stuff. Now it's a forum for everyone with an opinion and a mouthpiece. It's a place for people to exercise righteous indignation and anger moreso than search for knowledge and data.

I found this site 14 years ago under the search "how to ask out a girl on a date." Imagine that. I wonder how many men find it today Googling "feminism is bullshyt" or "why are American women such slvts." Don't get me wrong - cultural issues are relevant and it's healthy to bytch - but I'll always prefer the self-help nature of this forum. As bad as the female situation is in the West, I also think men are poisoning their minds with garbage websites (on both sides of the issue) that do nothing but ramp up the vitriol over men vs. women so they can get more clicks.

Long story short, you will make yourself happier much faster with self-improvement than by trying to change the entire West via angry comments online. There'll be plenty of the same problems long after you're dead, but will YOU have had a fulfilling life (including with women)? Think about it.

I agree with the main message however we moved to the MGTOW spectrum in the last years due to smartphones and social networks/tv shows which as we all know decreased even more the quality of modern women and the pleasure in interact with them while at the same time increasing the amount of frustration of pain we have to endure.

There is a reason why the MGTOW stream is taking place now and not in late 90s, girls were less fat, less narcististic, more able to bond and give something in return for our efforts and so on.

The price to quality ratio was much better, now the conditions are simply fvcked up, if in the late 90s given a good amount of value you could have get fresh fruit or at least a sample, now for twice the amount you can get the skin with the seeds while social and gov laws forbid you to ask a moneyback.

Improving yourself is the best thing you can do but at the same time is no longer connected to the rewards you get from women, if you do it you do it for yourself and your life in general.

If the sea is dirty it doesnt matter what a good swimmer you became, you can manage to move but surely you wont appreciate it much, thats why many just move to a home bath.

backbreaker · Aug 28, 2014

samspade said:
Agreed. The reason MGTOW is the current trend is because the nature of the internet has changed over the past two decades. It used to be a place where one looked up stuff. Now it's a forum for everyone with an opinion and a mouthpiece. It's a place for people to exercise righteous indignation and anger moreso than search for knowledge and data.

I found this site 14 years ago under the search "how to ask out a girl on a date." Imagine that. I wonder how many men find it today Googling "feminism is bullshyt" or "why are American women such slvts." Don't get me wrong - cultural issues are relevant and it's healthy to bytch - but I'll always prefer the self-help nature of this forum. As bad as the female situation is in the West, I also think men are poisoning their minds with garbage websites (on both sides of the issue) that do nothing but ramp up the vitriol over men vs. women so they can get more clicks.

Long story short, you will make yourself happier much faster with self-improvement than by trying to change the entire West via angry comments online. There'll be plenty of the same problems long after you're dead, but will YOU have had a fulfilling life (including with women)? Think about it.

great post. i'm very careful about the sites i visit, even the threads i look at on this forum. the internet can be a miserable place if you let it be.

Vulpine · Aug 28, 2014

backbreaker said:
great post. i'm very careful about the sites i visit, even the threads i look at on this forum. the internet can be a miserable place if you let it be.

It's a freaky place alright.

Check this out: 1977 BBC Newscast override

Note the message, it's a good one. Certainly a freaky place, the internet.

I chose the "edited" version, for the transcript, basically. Be sure to sit through the background intro.

"They will suck your energy from you -- the energy you call money and will put it to evil ends giving you worthless dross in return."
:nervous:

Freaked, yet? Look up the "Georgia Guidestones" and compare the message.

Yikes!

Of course, it's "a hoax" according to wiki

zekko · Aug 28, 2014

If you read some of the early pickup material now, there was never any questioning going on "are women worth it?", or maybe more accurately "Is the sex worth it?". Of course, some of the changes are due to changes in the culture. But some of the early PUA material seems even kind of naive compared to what we read now:

"I got a girl's number!", "How do you kiss a girl?", "I got a girl to make out with me!". Now days on this forum you would be more likely to hear "Numbers mean nothing" and "You had her in your house and you only made out with her? You didn't F-close her? It's over now buddy, you might as well give up on her, because she will only see you as an AFC from here on." The goalposts have moved.

What happened to BeDJ?

Master Don Juan

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Senior Don Juan

Banned

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