Simple spot. How to play it. Help.

Girl I've been seeing for 2 months, but not in a relationship with, has gone home for Easter and so is unavailable for the next 2 weeks, and because we're kinda long distance, the last time I saw her was 2 weeks ago.

So..when you know someone is not available to make plans with for the next two weekends, do you ask/try make plans now, or continue how I have been (few texts every few days) and delay asking until its closer to the time we're both available?

Does it even make a difference? I don't like the idea of having something set in stone that's up to 3 weeks away JUST to make myself feel better, cos even if she says yea now she can still flake.

I'm thinking that my eagerness to ask her out now is born out of neediness, but maybe it is actually the solid play???

What would you do?

Also, potential mistake I do not want to make again..

Last time I saw her I felt we got pretty close and she last minute cancelled some plans so I could stay longer - was me staying a mistake? I've been reading I should be in and out, leave them wanting more. But when you've travelled quite a long way, I thought staying made sense.

Ty guys

Don't make any plans 3 weeks before. Text her every few days like nothing changed, but when she came back and be available for any plans - then you should make plans. That's my opinion.

Other question - was it mistake about staying... That's what you will find out next time when you see her

Staying seems fine to me. As long as she's eager to see you and happy, then it's good. Just be wary about having her be bored of you, and of being too available.

About making plans 3 weeks early - no way. When you know it's born of neediness, when you get that gut feeling of "I need to see her or be reassured of her liking me" - it's a bad move, don't do it. When you feel you should make a move, it feels right inside - then definitely yes.

To her it'll just feel like a hanging obligation. Let her miss you. And don't pepper her with a request to see her, right when she get back (unless she brings it up).

(for visualization, imagine yourself on a trip somewhere, and your friend texts you 'Hey, let's hang out in 3 weeks time?' - it makes no sense.)

Makes sense.

This situation is such a head **** for me atm. One minute she seems interested the next minute not so much.

I feel like when she goes uninterested, if I do the same it's kinda obvious what I'm doing. (Problem or the correct move?)

Yesterday she text me really late at night saying 'sorry had no signal bla bla (not a question)' - in response to my last message the night before which didn't really need responding to.

Why is she doing this? My last message didn't really need a reply, but she does reply..but only to say sorry for not replying and then doesn't really start a conversation. So confused. Is she interested or what?

So basically she's initiating, but then again she's not.

So she's either not interested or likes putting the ball in my court with regards to opening a convo.

Thoughts?

I was thinking of saying something along the lines of 'Its no problem we don't HAVE to text every day ' - that way I'm not really initiating but I am putting the onus back on her, but i am worried she might take that the wrong way.

or

Not messaging her today - but that feels like an obv move, kinda like well i can go silent too.

or

Messaging her, not acknowledging her apology, but just making a statement in reply to her bla bla statement, showing no real sgings of wanting to open a convo, that way again it puts onus on her and that way i'll see if she's interested.

I've experienced similar and I reckon you have to keep the texting extremely flirty, funny and interesting.
You want her to wake up each day racing to the phone to see if you've graced her with yet another pearl of sidesplitting humour.
Push her buttons, challenge her and make her laugh at loud at your outrageousness.
It sounds like you two are just going through the motions and she's bored shytless. She still likes you but she wants you to be better.
If you like her, don't fall into the trap of getting complacent.
Flirt like a mutha fvcka and she won't be able to stop thinking about you.

If you do this and she's still cold, plan an exit strategy and go ghost.

Tips for how to challenge/flirt?

She referenced her butt muscles hurting a couple of messages back, maybe that was a spot I shoulda turned it more flirty,

'dont worry we don't HAVE to text everyday , that said how is that arse of yours doing..(insert flirty comment)'

ideas for comment

I wouldn't verbalise your intentions re "we don't have to text every day".
It comes off as supplicating to her frame.

Flirting isn't always sexual. It can be subtle but suggestive.

Overt flirting could be asking her what colour undies she's wearing.
Eg: You: Well that sucks you had a fight with your boss/got a speeding ticket/hurt your foot. So what colour undies are you wearing?

More subtle flirting is being funny and ****y. Tease her about stuff she does or says. Make light of trivial things. Say things that make out as though she's pursuing you. It's definitely an art and the best way to learn is through trial and error.
Make note of what works, discard what fails.
But if it becomes all too hard or she's just not responding positively, cut her loose and work some game on new chicks.

The less you text in between dates, the less chance you have of screwing something up, and the more her interest level will rise or stay where it was the last time you saw her.

Simple short banter and teasing every other day and don't be afraid to leave her hanging every once in a while.

Ty for advice guys feel like I'm learning lessons I shoulda learnt a while ago.

One more thing..you say the less I text the less chance there is of ****ing it up, I may have already text too much, is the play to just sstop texting so much, because to me that seems like a backwards move in the relationship.

This feeling kinda sucks, I feel I've ****ed up my approach and whilst its not gone yet, its inevitable that it will cos ive already been to available..