Self Limiting Mindset with hot chicks

thelonewolflegend said:

How u get them to come over?

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Crissco said:

You know the type of chicks i mean. Always doing their hair, always with a group of friends, 21-25 year old range(Usually). Knows they have options. Think of a southern California girl you think of kaley cuoco (Remember I am also in New York, in a suburb, but still New York)

http://us.cdn2828.fansshare.com/pho...annual-genesis-awards-no-makeup-652563230.jpg

Came to realize this a while ago. For the guys who does or did online dating im sure you know you have to shift through profiles to find a couple of hot chicks to only be scooped up a week or two later...or the exact opposite spectrum, still be on there a year later. Seems there is no middle ground. Some respond, some dont, some i get their number, some i dont. Normal stuff right?

But. Here is the issue...I am quicker to blow them off and say this isnt working then i am to lets say a girl like this:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6i8MeNyzhsM/Tep48m-TLTI/AAAAAAAACJo/mi4TPIgbn88/s1600/110604-112623.jpg

I think in my mind, I feel i dont deserve a chick whos really hot..Part of it is Online Dating, it screwed up my values. I kill it online, big time...But still, not satisfied on the looks caliber end. When i do get the chicks who i feel are my type. I blow them off because i can see it truly not working and you just after a while when they would flake, so im saving my self the headache. But there is more to it like i said. Its also to save my ego, I blow them off before they do so my ego doesnt get hurt and make my self limiting believe even worse.

Also noticed the girls who are in good shape..Even though i am in better shape then they are, they still arent fully interested, I get their number, but their interest and investment level isnt there.

That brings to NYC Daygame. Havent dont it much, but my good friend is a daygame coach whos done 1000s of approaches so its not like im a total beginner in daygame - NYC - Tons of hot chicks, tons of opportunity. When i approach i approach. No matter how hot the girl, i approach, if i get rejected, i just dont care and go the next one right down the block. My invest level is very small. I get a rush when i approach, always looking forward to it.

Dont have enough daygame experience to full compare. But i have enough night game experience to say my mindset towards flaky chicks during the night, small investment level, even if i dont pull or i do, im still okay.

Online dating, my mindset is different, i put in a bit more work, messaging, texting, planning the meet up. Concept is the same basically. But i feel like im more invested with texting, sometimes calling, building up rapport, getting them comfortable to come over --For your information, i dont do dates, hardly ever..Its either them come over, or they dont. Im very successful with my online dating and getting them to my house routine, I know exactly how to pull it off.

But to make this rant shorter, im stuck in a loop. Im not a bad looking guy at all. Im in amazing shape, smart - work as a programmer. I have a lot going for me, im aware of that, but im not getting what i want in terms of looks.

Think i might just do a experiment, where i do NYC daygame and approach like crazy.But only chicks who are 7.5 + on the looks scale just to see how my results compare.

Not sure who understands my situation and my mindset towards this. I feel like there is something im missing and not getting.

/Rant

Your thoughts?

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The411 said:

Dude why in God's name do you put some hot chicks "looks" over you as a person? Is it some inner insecurity? You should work out for you. Not to compare it to random chicks. Work for YOU and your future not for some random hot chicks.

Would you think less of some ugly dude who's made millions and doesn't give a damn about hot chicks because he's "ugly" and you aren't?

Ask yourself that. Who gives a sh1t if some chick doesn't like you, doesn't like me, decides she can do "better". What does that really matter to you in the grand scheme of things? You actually hold your own value based off of what some random "hottie" thinks?

I could get some hot as hell 11+ and I still wouldn't base my "value" off the chick because I know no matter what the same chick could go out tomorrow meet YOU and bang YOU or go out and fall head over heels with ANYONE on this forum or anywhere and decide they are better for her over me for whatever reason you can name.

Are you that scared of some hot chick that you have to strike first or she'll destroy you? Is that what working out has done? Or what you've accomplished in life? Do you give that much power and thought over some chick who's "hot" due to her looks?

Think of how completely ridiculous that sounds.

You get tons of chicks. Is that helping you in regards to whatever reason build "self esteem" that causes you to fear some hot chick? So they "know" they have "options". Do they really have great "options"? Do they really have more going for them than you? Most all chicks are insecure as hell. It isn't a good thing. Try to get to know the person and not the object and base that object off of your own self worth or you'll drive yourself insane.

Realize what you are trying to do is take some hot chick and control her to ONLY like you while at the same time basing your own worth off of if she likes you or not and if you get ANY self doubt you blow them off so they don't "hurt" you.

Seriously dude. Think how ridiculous that sounds. In the end you are only fvcking your own head up trying to control some chick to satisfy your own self esteem. Work on yourself for yourself. Realize not everyone is going to or "has" to like everyone. It's LIFE. The SAME chick who may not "like" you may not like ten other dudes and also may have other dudes who don't give a sh1t about her and "like" her either.

Would you be happy if EVERY hot chick you liked liked you? No. You'd take it as too easy and then feel none of them really liked you for you. They all just liked you.

Once you get over that obsessive thinking and not caring not in a negative way but just in a "that's life" way you'll be much better off. You can still go after and find a chick who you find hot and get her but you won't rely on her to validate you as YOU are your own validation.

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Crissco said:

Bro, you are taking what i saw wayyyy out of context haha...ive been working out since 17 man, way before i started pickng up chicks..I used me being in shape as an example, how i look better. Thats one haah

Two.."Thats life" - No man, what you said- "thats settling" - You dont just settle like that, did Schwarzenegger think "thats life" to become the greatest bodybuilder, actor, politician? Nope, he always wanted more and took that action to achieve it. Nothing wrong with that, thats how people get ahead.

Like said you are taking what i said way out of context...if you read what i said again, it mainly comes down to comparing daygame or online game and seeing where i can get hotter chicks, and acting to see if anyones been in my position about getting girls on certain looks scale on online dating.

Damn bro haha....bash much? This is why im starting to stay away from this site. All i see is flame wars, guys wanting the quick way out, or the magic bullet.

i appreciate you "telling it how it is" - But like i said already, your taking shi*t out of context.

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The411 said:

That's what I'm saying. If you aren't working out for chicks, have a good job (for yourself obviously), are good looking, why would you feel you aren't worthy of some hot chick based off online dating?

No matter what. Not everyone is going to like everyone. Meaning you may get 10 10's in a row and the 11th 10 may not want anything to do with you or I and may even prefer some dude we'd see as "much more below" us. That's what I mean by "that's life". Not saying to settle.

As far as online vs. real life? Of course you'll get better looking chicks and most likely find more quality quick as there's much more info face to face than someone online. (ESPECIALLY chicks who need to use online dating. That's the first flag right there.)

The purpose of my post wasn't to bash you dude! lol. I know who you are I've seen your pics. You should have no trouble getting hot chicks and quality ones that's what semi-set me off in that I'm thinking "What the hell is Crissco talking about?"

You do know who this is correct?

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