Question: why are you not happy with yourself?

Certainly, the fact that you are on this site means that you are looking for something.

Why do you want to become that certain person or perhaps alpha?

Is it because of happiness?

Why do you think that you will have happiness once you reach that point?

A lot of men struggle to find meaningful solitude. We are surrounded by both men and women taking the easy way out in life, living vicariously through social media and trends. Men are acting like women and women like men. Our jobs emasculate us.

Swallowing the red pill can be a lonely experience if you let it. It has to do not only with relationships, but money, careers, etc. I have found that in light of just breaking off with a BPD last year, and losing my father in October, I have found comfort and purpose in my building my brand. Along with my partner we are trying to redefine self-help. It's red pill philosophy that extends far beyond relationships.

Every man wants to leave behind a legacy. We're only on this earth for a cup of coffee in the eyes of the universe, so we want to transcend and become larger than life. It seems impossible in a superficial world that revolves around long commutes to collect a meek paycheck and an obsession with consumerist garbage like the iPhone. We are really struggling for deeper meaning, and will do so forever unless we're willing to work very hard to create something that'll stand the test of time.

The guys on here typing away desperately and feverishly trying to save a broken relationship are way behind the 8 ball and missing so much. I feel that relationships should account for about 20% of a man's livelihood if he is living a healthy, balanced life.

BlueAlpha1 said:

A lot of men struggle to find meaningful solitude. We are surrounded by both men and women taking the easy way out in life, living vicariously through social media and trends. Men are acting like women and women like men. Our jobs emasculate us.

Every man wants to leave behind a legacy. We're only on this earth for a cup of coffee in the eyes of the universe, so we want to transcend and become larger than life. It seems impossible in a superficial world that revolves around long commutes to collect a meek paycheck and an obsession with consumerist garbage like the iPhone.

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Which is exactly what schools, college, the workforce, media, government, and big banks want. Robots that keep the economy chugging along, do as their told, and not complain. From when we are infants, it is drilled into us to get straight As, memorize facts, be smart, go to college, get accepted to the top University, and get a high paying job. We are never told to be leaders, difference makers, challenge thoughts, ideas, laws. That is way too controversial for the people in charge. :nono:

We are really struggling for deeper meaning, and will do so forever unless we're willing to work very hard to create something that'll stand the test of time. The guys on here typing away desperately and feverishly trying to save a broken relationship are way behind the 8 ball and missing so much.

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Agree. The media (powers that be) have brain washed us that you MUST have this and that or else you will be a loser.

Don't have a girlfriend? Loser
Aren't married? Loser
Don't have kids? Loser
Aren't rich? Loser
Don't have a 4 bedroom house? Loser
No PhD? Loser
No six pack? Loser
Need counseling? Loser
Mental health problems? Loser

They say they brainwash in Middle East and North Korea. I think here they do a pretty good job too, they just do it in a much sexier and subtle way.

Honestly y

Honestly you guys are speaking the truth.

Honestly, not in any arrogant way, I am absolutely happy with myself. A kind of blissfulness is in my soul.

Even tough I am not a millionaire, but why should I be? I like the way I am. And I am happy. Isn't that enough?

Sites like this tends to push people for "too much Don Juan" you may say. People who comes here realize they have problems but they also tend to think that they have HUGE stuff to accomplish in itder to be happy because of the very basics conditions of this site.

BraddH said:

Honestly you guys are speaking the truth.

Honestly, not in any arrogant way, I am absolutely happy with myself. A kind of blissfulness is in my soul.

Even tough I am not a millionaire, but why should I be? I like the way I am. And I am happy. Isn't that enough?

Sites like this tends to push people for "too much Don Juan" you may say. People who comes here realize they have problems but they also tend to think that they have HUGE stuff to accomplish in itder to be happy because of the very basics conditions of this site.

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you say you are happy, but you ask why we come here, since on your view, comming here means you are not happy, and that is what you said.

also site like this gives infos and insight, what you do with it its up to you, some go all the way and do a huge change in life, other just try to improve something he feel he should, other come just to troll because tehy have nothing else in life so trolling here is something to feel better about the lame life he have (you know the saying misery loves company).

I think you should worry less about what other people want for they life and worry more about your own life and what you want

I'm not happy cuz of ther 3 items below

Not Very good with women ( due to shyness and approach anxiety)
No six pack.
Aren't Rich.

Alvafe said:

you say you are happy, but you ask why we come here, since on your view, comming here means you are not happy, and that is what you said.

also site like this gives infos and insight, what you do with it its up to you, some go all the way and do a huge change in life, other just try to improve something he feel he should, other come just to troll because tehy have nothing else in life so trolling here is something to feel better about the lame life he have (you know the saying misery loves company).

I think you should worry less about what other people want for they life and worry more about your own life and what you want

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When i say that people come here because they are looking for something, i mean the mass. Most people do. I come here absolutely spontaneously. Ot looking for anything. I am not expecting any outcome; i am not looking for anything. There is a great difference. What i am doing is simply my art.

Starwolf said:

I'm not happy cuz of ther 3 items below

Not Very good with women ( due to shyness and approach anxiety)
No six pack.
Aren't Rich.

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1. Then you have missed the whole point of this site. They preach that happiness should not come from women. But from within yourself.
2. Why?
3. Why?

I'm on this site because I had two flakes this week and I want to know why... was I not alpha enough?

BraddH said:

1. Then you have missed the whole point of this site. They preach that happiness should not come from women. But from within yourself.
2. Why?
3. Why?

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1. i know, but i will be happy when ,approaching, talking, and getting numbers from women comes easy to me. Its more about the ability..not the women.

2. Being fit boosts confidence a lot.
3. Money equals freedom.

Or if you meant why havent i reached them yet?. Lol..i Should have come to this site when i was younger. Anyways working hard on it at the monent

I think I see something in this site that is rarely seen and almost never mentioned.

I think people come here because of love.

There was once a famous phycology study done coined Harlow's study. In short it is boiled down to food? or security?

Would young monkeys choose the between the ability to eat or be comforted. Which was more important.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsA5Sec6dAI

We dont tend to admit it around here much, but we come here for love, connection and comfort. These are all things that are essential to proper human development and being a healthy human being, and MAN.

Its not that we are all here for the pursuit of romantic love either. That may be how its starts, but, at least in my case, it quickly develops beyond that.
We have all come to find:

Comfort: You are not alone. No matter where you are on your walk in this life someone is right there with you or has done it already. Every screw up and victory you think is entirely unique to you, is not, and can be shared. When you share experiences, knowledge, wisdom; growth can take hold out of the void of confusion, regret and narcissism. Self-betterment also creates strength and strength creates comfort. When you are strong you do not shiver in the night, you cut down the damn forest and build a shelter. Good thing others showed you how.

Connection: The anonymity of this website creates something so rare and valuable I cannot say I have found it elsewhere. People around here get REAL with each other. (for the most part) Authenticity is so extremely rare these days. A world that lacks authenticity hinders connections with other people and hinders human growth as a whole. We connect by sharing ourselves in a real way, real stories, real feedback, real criticism. This place is a fast track to growth because of those ingredients. When the right seed hits this soil around here it grows like a sunflower.

Love: We all probably at one time or another found this site because we desired to love someone, a girl. Some never had it yet, but fire within them burns in wanting it. Some of us have had it and lost it and want to do it again, but better. Some just want to love for a short time, over and over. Some of us are tired of loving but want to be loved. Some of us have never really had that part of the equation. All valuable pursuits of a man.
Without love, connection and comfort, you will choose to starve yourself before you give up the pursuit of those things. (ok. Not entirely, but all of you have seen glimpses of this when you meet or lose a great girl, or even family member. What happens? Appetite always suffers right?)

So you come here. You seek knowledge and answers. You seek connection and comfort. But what you find and what you receive transcends your previous thoughts of what was your original definition of those things. That is why you come back!

If you are like me (and you may not be, or just don’t see it in yourself) you realized that love has more definition and dimensions than you originally thought. Look, nothing is quite like the romantic love and sex with a female, its awesome and is the foundation stone to this place. However, I have been educated around here that love is way more than that. Its importance way more than hearing an “I love you” from a girl.

Love comes from encouraging and uplifting the broken hearted and dimmed spirit. Love comes from being unguarded and raw, hidden behind the vail of the internet, yet more exposed and ready to receive than anywhere else. Love shows up around here because unlike other relationships, people around here are open to RECEIVE it! Strangers, getting real and sharing knowledge! Love comes from knowledge and wisdom. Caring for and uplifting those who walk together with you teaches you more about how to LOVE YOURSELF!

Pointing the love I am capable of inward, is one of the greatest gifts I have ever been given.

Especially today, our society has almost a completely CONSUMER mentality. Take, consume, chew, digest, more, more, more, food, media, fuel, sex, money, faster, more, more.

Yet, around this community I see giving and sharing. Selflessly. The mantra around here, even when you get a smack down is: “Avoid pain, because I already went through it for you” AGAPE.(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agape )

The truest love of all. Comradery.

The succession of loving steps around here seems to me to be perfect.

1.Love a stranger with nothing to gain.

2.Love yourself better because you have done well to give back what you took.

3.Be open and receptive to the love of those without agenda, for it is pure.

4.Now, you are most equipped to share love with a woman. (and yes, even if it is just for a night. Passion can be love too)

You came here seeking, broken, bewildered and wondering. Sure, you’ll get better with women, the material here is golden for that, and there is no doubt.

With any discernment and the slightest critical thinking skills what you have found is so much more than that. Under the guise of romantic and sexual pursuits, you are getting BETTER all around!

With every word you read and every word you give back, no matter how short or banal, you participated in a community and, YOU. WILL. FIND. YOU.

Revel in what you have found.

Trump said:

No six pack? Loser

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Heh heh, they spread that one here.
Can't keep yourself in shape? Loser.

zekko said:

Heh heh, they spread that one here.
Can't keep yourself in shape? Loser.

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From personal experience, I have been fat, very skinny, skinny with abs, big with no abs and now large and lean. I have seen absolutely no difference at all in picking up women. That bs they spread around here is for people who have no confidence to begin with. The issue with doing that is those fellas will place to much emphasis on physical appearance and nothing on mental. They believe that being aesthetically pleasing is 10000% all there is in this "game". For example, my buddy thinks that if he isn't "aesthetic" he will not get women and he thinks when you look good (as a guy) you get everything handed to you. I wish I could slap him across the damn face.

JohnChops said:

From personal experience, I have been fat, very skinny, skinny with abs, big with no abs and now large and lean. I have seen absolutely no difference at all in picking up women. That bs they spread around here is for people who have no confidence to begin with. The issue with doing that is those fellas will place to much emphasis on physical appearance and nothing on mental. They believe that being aesthetically pleasing is 10000% all there is in this "game". For example, my buddy thinks that if he isn't "aesthetic" he will not get women and he thinks when you look good (as a guy) you get everything handed to you. I wish I could slap him across the damn face.

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First No one likes a fvcking big belly. Period. So being fit should be based on your own lifestyle not because of some external consequences. like attract like so don't expect to have hot attractive girls who aren't fvcked up in their heads if you are a fat slob.

Now people are full of sh!t and they make up the most fvcking bullsh!t excuses in their own minds just to avoid discomfort and hurting their fragile ego.

Personally I like being comfortable but every happy moment in my life there was some discomfort and risk. being afraid of rejection because of some excuse like "I don't have six abs" or " I'm poor" or " I can't approach because that's creepy "...etc is just a buffer that's made up by your mind and it's blocking you from expressing your inner joy and be happy and truly not giving a fvck because frankly if you are living in your comfort zone you are going to be the biggest boring motherfvcker out there and you will always attract boring people with no life at all.

embrace risk if you want live one hell of a life in this dirt ball that's in the middle of nowhere.

Look, I am not sure when this turned into another "fitness" discussion but in short, you have it all wrong. Looking fit and having a nice physique is secondary to the mental and body health that fitness provides. Work out becasue it makes you look good if thats what get you motivated. But the real substance of fitness is the balance of hormanes and brain chemicals that transform you into what a man is supposed to be and feel. Plain as day. Get fit and healty, develop stamina and confidance, devote yourslef to self betterment, and the rest just comes as a by product. Get in shape for you. When you do, you'll then know why.

To answer your question, I am here because I was looking for ways to fix my life, ways to make it better, ways to IMPROVE MYSELF. I have done the common sense stuff and tried to exercise, get more social, dress better, etc. But I needed to know about what was right and wrong, how to fix it. I started reading up on ways to get stronger, started getting into the psychology of people, a little bit of sociology, and some neurology too. Tried finding out why I was different from people, learned to hide it better, tried looking for ways to better my social life.

I wanted a better life. That was the main thing. I wasn't happy. I have gotten to the the point where I have become the person I had wanted to become. But it was always short lived because I came to the realization that my family, specifically my parents, and more so my dad than the other, is inhibiting my progress. They actually hindered my development as a child. When I leave them, I will be free. Truly free and independent of any person controlling my life in any way. I am looking for freedom. Because that will lead me to my happiness.

One thing though that I can no longer deny is that genetics or the biggest factor in a person's life. In the end, it is the person who has the genetic advantages that wins. I am still trying hard to be happy and positive though so don't think of it as ME who said that.