Self Confidence

[chicago#1]

Here are some of my own thoughts on Self Confidence.

How many things do we all do that are way more risky then approaching a woman, chatting her up, and getting her number??

I came to this realization recently at work. I am a shop steward, meaning that I am always having to stand up to management on a daily basis. It is sorta high stress, and the personal risks are pretty high; I have to keep myself and others from getting in trouble at work, and I get criticized by co-workers and especially management; it is a leadership role with all the demands that implies. The other day I had to lay it on the line with the main manager. He totally backed down. I was feeling pretty good about that.

I work with the public, and about 5 minutes later this woman came in, whom I have always been curious about and who is very attractive. Then I thought: it makes no sense that I can be on one hand be screwing with the people in charge at work, but shy away from something as simple as asking for a number, even from someone who is super-attractive. I was feeling so confident that I was able to skip over most of the small talk (we already have a kind of rapport) and just ask her if she wanted to go out. She said yes and then gave me her work number.

Sh*t, that was so easy, and I wouldn't have cared if she had said no. Then I thought; how many people do things, like make major investments, compete in sports (esp martial arts), have dangerous jobs, all of which are risky, but can't ask a woman out? Putting in this perspective changed my whole attitude in seconds! And now I have a potentially hot first date as a reward (I'll find out in 4 or 5 days http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/smile.gif )

[Turbobird]

Nice worked, Chicago#1! ...But I would suggest that you go for the home phone # in the future. And that you don’t ask her for a date while getting the #. Tell her on the phone 3-5 days later.

/Turbobird

[chicago#1]

Hopefully, this will clarify--I didn't make plans with her then; is that what you mean??

[SoSuave.com]

Tips forum.

[Turbobird]

Originally posted by chicago#1:
Hopefully, this will clarify--I didn't make plans with her then; is that what you mean??

That was not what I meant! I just have the opinion that it is better to ask for the home phone number and to wait asking her for a date until you make the phone call some days later. That’s my opinion, but that doesn’t make it the truth. You have to make your own decisions.

Of course you should date her! Some mistakes (or maybe you handled it just right) doesn’t mean that you should give up. Just always think about what you can make different the next time.

I hope you understand what I’m trying to tell you.

/Turbobird

[Rebel Leader]

This is a very important tip, chicago. When a person identifies success in one place, like success on the job, he understands how he combined his feelings with events to create that success. If he transfers that knowledge of himself to the dating game, it will seem like more familiar territory. He'll know what emotions to expect and when, like anxiety or adrenaline rushes, and won't be overwhelmed by them.

I think it would be helpful to post a series of examples that link together familiar successful behaviors to dating behaviors. It would reduce the intimidation factor of dating by making it as commonplace as going to work.

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Live ... Love ... Laugh

[Vegas Playa]

Just got done watching David Blaine's
"Vertigo" special, and I thought of this post.

Though David Blaine willingly exposes himself to these feats of endurance and faces his fears through these stunts he does, I wonder how much ballz he has when it comes to approaching women.

I heard him on Howard Stern this morning talking about how women like Fiona Apple and Angie Everheart are "friends" of his, and it sounded a bit AFCish.

Just a thought, but wouldn't it be funny is he was an AFC, in spite of his fearlessness in other aspects of his life?

[Wolf]

Originally Posted by Vegas Playa

Just got done watching David Blaine's
"Vertigo" special, and I thought of this post.

Though David Blaine willingly exposes himself to these feats of endurance and faces his fears through these stunts he does, I wonder how much ballz he has when it comes to approaching women.

I heard him on Howard Stern this morning talking about how women like Fiona Apple and Angie Everheart are "friends" of his, and it sounded a bit AFCish.

Just a thought, but wouldn't it be funny is he was an AFC, in spite of his fearlessness in other aspects of his life?

I'm sure he could magic them into his bed if he wanted...

[Sandow]

Totally agree with the post but at the same time I can't stand guys that are always constantly nagging girls, whistling at them, hitting on them non stop, being super creepy. I try not to fall in that category. You always see this at bars...

[imarockstar]

good job dude. i dont know why this home phone number thing is such an issue though. i mean yeah if youre older like say 30 something and you know she probably has a house then it might be a good idea, but all my friends and the girls i know, and myself included, we dont need a home phone number. we're young college kids or just live in an apartment and a cell phone is all we really need. i mean whats the difference between a woman giving you her cell phone number or her house number, its still a number right. she couldve just said no i have a bf or blow you off completely. plus how weird would it sound to say" hey id like to see you again, you should give me your home phone number so we can hang out sometime".

i dont know, this is just my opinion, i just feel like some people on this forum take every little tip they read to heart and act like there is some kind of code to dating women and if you dont do every little thing as this website says then you wont get a date. no disrespect, i just want to express to you guys that asking a girl for her number shouldnt be so complicated.

[cedd]

Turbobird had talked about the home phone number because the girl gave chicago#1 her work number.
my thought.