URGENT - The girl had the nerve to hit me multple times while "Play fighting"

Dante420

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2008
Messages
577
Reaction score
7
Location
Massachusetts
I was really into this girl, first girl in awhile that I respected - it was like the rarest thing I've ever encountered. She could be really cute and adorable one second, really respectable and sexy - you could actually see her eyes change between cute to sexy. Some people you hang out with and leave feeling drained and de-energized, while being with her left me very happy, and energized. This is only over the course of maybe 4 weeks.

Anyway, last night she was trying to play games. Trying to play fight and get rough with me. I lightly slap her and just play fight stuff. Then a couple times she slapped me for real (because I said she wasn't tough probably) a couple times, like real ones multiple times. It shocked me! Really hurt emotionally the feeling of a girl actually feeling I'm the type of guy that it's okay to just slap like that and completely disrespect me. What was worse is that it shocked me so much that I froze and couldn't react properly, I knew for the whole night I should of just left and I didn't - because the AFC in my mind was telling me "She doesn't deserve you just leaving on her like that" at first I was thinking .."Well that's what happens when I play" then I realized..no she's hitting me multiple times and then after apologizes and says "I'm sorry for hurting you", I'm like "You didn't hurt me but whatever helps you sleep at night". Thoughout my time of knowing her she's been telling me she's tough and actually beats up guys over petty reasons n her town... I'm basically like "Ya suuuure" I guess it irritated her that I don't find a 5 foot 1 100 pound girl tough

So...back to the main issue.

I let the issue slide and kinda withheld myself from our normal cuddling but still let her cuddle me and kept a hand on her. She knew I was mad and I kept it below the surface which was totally AFC of me.

How could I of handled this better?

What do I do from here? I was so disappointed in the way I handled it, it actually hurt my chest not to mention my pride...I let the window of opportunity pass for a reaction and I now I have no idea what to do. She's such a good snuggler that I woke up happy
 

Dante420

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2008
Messages
577
Reaction score
7
Location
Massachusetts
I would really appreciate advice on this, I'm kind of lost on this and have no person to confide in besides SoSuave
 

Dante420

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2008
Messages
577
Reaction score
7
Location
Massachusetts
29 views and nobody can help me on this? This forum clearly is not what it use to be. I been a member of this forum since 2006, I'm 18 years old now (Ya I been into PUA since I was 14). This is a real issue, not just some "How can I get this one specific girl" - type thing.
 

Ease

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
1,325
Reaction score
51
I feel the same way sometimes. A moment of shock can really throw me off on the spot.

But you should probably stop crying that a girl hit you and slap her back harder next time.
 

Scars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
2,153
Reaction score
1,012
Age
34
Location
Phoenix
I had a similar situation where I got into a verbal fight with my girl and she punched me in the face. I exploded on her so bad to the point where she now fears me. Hasn't ever tried that BS on me ever sense.

I wouldn't let her off so easy. Withdrawl your attention from her a little bit. This is how you punish her. Let her know you are extremely pissed, and that you won't EVER tolerate any disrespect from her ever again.
 

Dante420

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2008
Messages
577
Reaction score
7
Location
Massachusetts
Ease said:
I feel the same way sometimes. A moment of shock can really throw me off on the spot.

But you should probably stop crying that a girl hit you and slap her back harder next time.
In her bed room, where she lives with her family and shares a wall with her Hells Angel/Mafia connected father...I slap her lightly and playfully as soon I overstep that boundary she'll try to play her games..Like I said I have respect for her but she plays really childish rookie games. Like games you'd see from rookies, ala 7th grade girls, fat girls, girls with little experience. I smacked her ass really hard (and loud) and she rolled over and put a cute childly regressive voice on and then pretended to be mad about it....like literally right after slapping me in the face multiple times (as hard as she could)
 

amoka

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2006
Messages
1,934
Reaction score
63
Dante420 said:
I was really into this girl, first girl in awhile that I respected - it was like the rarest thing I've ever encountered. She could be really cute and adorable one second, really respectable and sexy - you could actually see her eyes change between cute to sexy. Some people you hang out with and leave feeling drained and de-energized, while being with her left me very happy, and energized. This is only over the course of maybe 4 weeks.

Anyway, last night she was trying to play games. Trying to play fight and get rough with me. I lightly slap her and just play fight stuff. Then a couple times she slapped me for real (because I said she wasn't tough probably) a couple times, like real ones multiple times. It shocked me! Really hurt emotionally the feeling of a girl actually feeling I'm the type of guy that it's okay to just slap like that and completely disrespect me. What was worse is that it shocked me so much that I froze and couldn't react properly, I knew for the whole night I should of just left and I didn't - because the AFC in my mind was telling me "She doesn't deserve you just leaving on her like that" at first I was thinking .."Well that's what happens when I play" then I realized..no she's hitting me multiple times and then after apologizes and says "I'm sorry for hurting you", I'm like "You didn't hurt me but whatever helps you sleep at night". Thoughout my time of knowing her she's been telling me she's tough and actually beats up guys over petty reasons n her town... I'm basically like "Ya suuuure" I guess it irritated her that I don't find a 5 foot 1 100 pound girl tough

So...back to the main issue.

I let the issue slide and kinda withheld myself from our normal cuddling but still let her cuddle me and kept a hand on her. She knew I was mad and I kept it below the surface which was totally AFC of me.

How could I of handled this better?

What do I do from here? I was so disappointed in the way I handled it, it actually hurt my chest not to mention my pride...I let the window of opportunity pass for a reaction and I now I have no idea what to do. She's such a good snuggler that I woke up happy
I would have bet this was another one of DrBeard's writing.
 

Radharc

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 14, 2005
Messages
235
Reaction score
5
Was she on a playfull vibe all the time while doing that?

If yes then I dont see what the issue was, she likes to play rough, big deal. Next time just grab her wrist - the idea is to make it clear that you´re the one in control - and then either make a joke about her being too rough or be more blunt, just get the message across.

She didnt disrespected you, you were playing. But I agree the way you dealt with it was not in your favour, now she knows you didnt liked it but also didnt do anything about - not good
 

Diaforetikos

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 28, 2009
Messages
411
Reaction score
24
Location
Northern California
So your upset because you guys were play fighting and she actually hurt you? You didn't tell her it hurt, but she obviously knew... Okaaaay...

First off, you shoulda laughed it off. Second, you guys were PLAY FIGHTING!! Someone is bound to get hurt, even if it's the man. Oh well dood.

Man up and have fun. You know what brought her to doing it in the first place. You should hit her back harder than you normally do. My brother and his girl do the same sh!t and one of em always gets hurt. Laugh it off and move on.

You still like her, so have fun and move on. It's cool mate.
 

Dante420

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2008
Messages
577
Reaction score
7
Location
Massachusetts
Scars said:
I had a similar situation where I got into a verbal fight with my girl and she punched me in the face. I exploded on her so bad to the point where she now fears me. Hasn't ever tried that BS on me ever sense.

I wouldn't let her off so easy. Withdrawl your attention from her a little bit. This is how you punish her. Let her know you are extremely pissed, and that you won't EVER tolerate any disrespect from her ever again.
The Pimp in me wanted to grab a loaf of bread place a piece of bread in my hand and slap the sh!t outta her

The Superstar in me wanted to walk straight outta her house

The AFC in me won and had me stay the night with her, although it hurt me so bad emotionally. When I was younger I was in a relationship with a girl who hit me a lot when we argued and we were together for 2 years. It really hurt me that I didn't respect myself enough to just straight up walk out and leave. I was upset with myself all night, I didn't talk much after that.

Then I definitely let the window of opportunity for a reaction on that pass by just spending the night and sleeping with her and waking up happy because she's a good snuggler. :kick:

I know I learned from this and would never let it happen again but I just don't know how to handle this specific situation at this point. I really had a high potential rating for her, I thought she could be it but recently and even before this I feel like things weren't as good when she first met me. She gave me head often back then, we still haven't ****ed yet (her dad's usually home and if not her brothers are and it's not situation for it yet) but now she just says she's gonna give me head and leaves me disappointed when I get nothing, I gave up on asking for it. The last time she did, she had it out and was clearly trying to be annoying and test me when she kept acting like she had so many little things to do before she actually got to it. I think I'm done with this even tho I really liked her and was so happy being around her she CLEARLY met me under a false pretense that she didn't plan to live up to
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,042
Reaction score
5,672
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
I was mad and I kept it below the surface which was totally AFC of me.


You were mad at yourself more than her. Getting pissy and stomping off would have been even more AFC.

Just learn how to block a punch...especially blows to your ego.
 

Mantis Toboggan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 27, 2010
Messages
862
Reaction score
58
Dante420 said:
29 views and nobody can help me on this? This forum clearly is not what it use to be. I been a member of this forum since 2006, I'm 18 years old now (Ya I been into PUA since I was 14). This is a real issue, not just some "How can I get this one specific girl" - type thing.
Shut the F up. People don't take orders from you.
 

Strelok

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 20, 2010
Messages
920
Reaction score
44
She just wanted you to go caveman and made an indirect invitation,obviously you failed.
There are still women who are sane enough to let their instincts drive them,she wanted you to slap her and fvck her hard and you didn't,you totally missed it.

Do you expect her to ask you for some rough sex? no they never directly ask,they just let you know and it's up to you to get it.
You are probably used to those "smart and modern" women who blindly obey to the "rules" where women have to be worshipped as princess even if once in a while they feel the need to be treated as slvts.
 

Dante420

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2008
Messages
577
Reaction score
7
Location
Massachusetts
maqnetik said:
shes sexually/emotionally frustrated
I agree, but she's not just gonna get my d1ck like that. If she thinks witholding head and trying to test me will work I can easily move onto someone else. Matter of fact I was so into her I let myself be held back by her. After I completed the filming of a reality TV show this was my last commitment to this area, I wanted to move out to Cali - I stayed around because I really liked being around her

Radharc said:
Was she on a playfull vibe all the time while doing that?

If yes then I dont see what the issue was, she likes to play rough, big deal. Next time just grab her wrist - the idea is to make it clear that you´re the one in control - and then either make a joke about her being too rough or be more blunt, just get the message across.

She didnt disrespected you, you were playing. But I agree the way you dealt with it was not in your favour, now she knows you didnt liked it but also didnt do anything about - not good

She was not, she was on the test vibe, trying to test me and when it came to hitting me she hit me outta anger I could see it in her face and the way she was watching for my reaction.

The bolded part is my concern exactly! All night I thought about that. I was passive and nonreactive at the wrong time. I should of left

Diaforetikos said:
So your upset because you guys were play fighting and she actually hurt you? You didn't tell her it hurt, but she obviously knew... Okaaaay...

First off, you shoulda laughed it off. Second, you guys were PLAY FIGHTING!! Someone is bound to get hurt, even if it's the man. Oh well dood.

Man up and have fun. You know what brought her to doing it in the first place. You should hit her back harder than you normally do. My brother and his girl do the same sh!t and one of em always gets hurt. Laugh it off and move on.

You still like her, so have fun and move on. It's cool mate.
I hit her playfully and she goes and tries to hit me violently multiple times? This is a girl who's known in her town to be able to beat up guys, she does do it she actually just beat down some kid for robbing her house right before she met me (clearly were just fresh outta high school age, 18). By me calling her weak she's trying to compensate


Mantis Toboggan said:
Shut the F up. People don't take orders from you.
Even if I was by myself and you said this to my face I'd put you in your place and be spitting on your blood. Stay outta my thread if you have nothing to add, don't try to get disrespectful with me over you keyboard.

Strelok said:
She just wanted you to go caveman and made an indirect invitation,obviously you failed.
There are still women who are sane enough to let their instincts drive them,she wanted you to slap her and fvck her hard and you didn't,you totally missed it.

Do you expect her to ask you for some rough sex? no they never directly ask,they just let you know and it's up to you to get it.
You are probably used to those "smart and modern" women who blindly obey to the "rules" where women have to be worshipped as princess even if once in a while they feel the need to be treated as slvts.
It made me mad, the girl could of asked to give me head after that and I woulda told her no. However your clearly right

Bible_Belt said:
I was mad and I kept it below the surface which was totally AFC of me.


You were mad at yourself more than her. Getting pissy and stomping off would have been even more AFC.

Just learn how to block a punch...especially blows to your ego.
I've always respected the knowledge you drop with your posts because your usually right but what do I do from this point. I left her house this morning, she went to work. I went for a workout
 

Dante420

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2008
Messages
577
Reaction score
7
Location
Massachusetts
I just don't feel it's right that a female would go for the dominant position like that. I don't feel it's right that I clearly come off as the type of guy who it's okay to hit...NO! I worked to hard for that, I workout daily my body is in pristine condition, I carry myself smoothly - this is the same girl who told she thinks of me as an alpha male
 

Radharc

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 14, 2005
Messages
235
Reaction score
5
She seems to have anger issues... there are women where this goes a lot deeper than the usual female crap. My BPD ex sometimes used to go berserk and started to try to hit me in middle of the street, one of the worst things you can ever go trough, a crazy woman trying to hit you, you trying to restrain her, and having some retarded bystander idiot guys getting in your face while she´s having a blast with the whole thing.
I would say eject, trust me, you dont wanna go trough that.
 

Mantis Toboggan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 27, 2010
Messages
862
Reaction score
58
Dante420 said:
Even if I was by myself and you said this to my face I'd put you in your place and be spitting on your blood. Stay outta my thread if you have nothing to add, don't try to get disrespectful with me over you keyboard.
You're a teenager.


Dante420 said:
I just don't feel it's right that a female would go for the dominant position like that. I don't feel it's right that I clearly come off as the type of guy who it's okay to hit...NO! I worked to hard for that, I workout daily my body is in pristine condition, I carry myself smoothly - this is the same girl who told she thinks of me as an alpha male
It's not right. She's immature. I had an immature girlfriend do the same thing to me once.

But your body being "in pristine condition" has nothing to do with it. She's young and stupid and doesn't know the boundaries of relationships.
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,042
Reaction score
5,672
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
Dante420 said:
what do I do from this point.

Nothing now that it's in the past, other than working on having thicker skin, being harder to make angry. The easier that a woman can upset you, then the more power she has over you.
 

SoldMySoul

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 24, 2006
Messages
787
Reaction score
23
Location
Lousyiana
Dante420 said:
Even if I was by myself and you said this to my face I'd put you in your place and be spitting on your blood. Stay outta my thread if you have nothing to add, don't try to get disrespectful with me over you keyboard.

What kind of crap is this???? You are being awful presumptuous in your reply to him. He was out of line for what he posted, but to reply back in the manner you chose, NOT GOOD, Young Buck! He may just wipe they floor with your a$$.

You were getting a little petulant because people had not responded in the time you required.

You do not like getting popped, then do not play! It is all fun and games UNTIL somebody gets hurt.
 
Top