hi DJ's
I had a short three month relationship that ended little over a month ago. It was the best and worst three months short relationship. Now that it's over all I can do is ask myself " what happened?"as I'm left little confused.
I met her at a social event through a friend. She's 30, a child psychologist and was my type of girl from physical to intellectual level. We were able to connect amazingly well it was like I she was female version of me. The first impression was AMAZING and I was interested to get to know her more.
There were few major red flags from beginning but I decided to loop past them thinking if she is 30 and a psychologist she should have figured herself out by now.
- She was abandoned when she was 5 years old by her biological father which she does not keep contact with to this day. The biological dad has a new family now and she spoke negatively of him. He does not want to see her.
- She was raised by a step dad that never loved her and was very cold and controlling. The guy died three years ago. He was a hired gun (mercenary professional ). Step dad's dad was same profession.
- When she was 20 years old she was abandoned again by her mom and step dad when they left state without saying anything to her. They just left her and moved to a different state on the opposite side of the country.
- Her mom never had any saying as the step dad had all the saying in family and power. Mom never stood up for her daughter.
Although I thought I knew better I didn't want to judge book by cover and decided to date her based on the connection and chemistry we had. I took the gamble you can say.
One and half months into dating we slept for first time. Little late but I thought she likes to take it slow. When we were done she turned her back towards me in bed and froze up. Did not say anything for a minute or two... then said I should hold her. Her face looked like she was going through something really emotional or a flashback in her mind that I didn't understand at all. Soon after she was leaving she started crying outside the car and said " This is all so real now" and that she can't be with me. It's like intimacy triggered something and it all started collapsing from here on.
Few days later we got back together but that was a mistake because no matter how I tried to talk to her we had constant fights and she was pushing me away. We ended up breaking up month later leaving my friends and family in surprise.
Everyone thought we were perfect together and didn't see it coming.
I think that her difficult childhood which I can't relate to but tried to understand by listening had something to do with the way she's going through relationships with men. She said all her relationships have been negative not a single good one. How can something that was so "perfect" end so bad so fast? Can someone shed some light on this that possible went through similar experience or has background in psychology? I really tried to listen to her and understand her needs... unfortunately she also bent my frame I have to admit that. Guys if you date a girl and she has such past think twice don't let her good looks, her charming personality fool you. This could have been worse then it was but it left me confused as I'm still thinking about it one and half month later......
I had a short three month relationship that ended little over a month ago. It was the best and worst three months short relationship. Now that it's over all I can do is ask myself " what happened?"as I'm left little confused.
I met her at a social event through a friend. She's 30, a child psychologist and was my type of girl from physical to intellectual level. We were able to connect amazingly well it was like I she was female version of me. The first impression was AMAZING and I was interested to get to know her more.
There were few major red flags from beginning but I decided to loop past them thinking if she is 30 and a psychologist she should have figured herself out by now.
- She was abandoned when she was 5 years old by her biological father which she does not keep contact with to this day. The biological dad has a new family now and she spoke negatively of him. He does not want to see her.
- She was raised by a step dad that never loved her and was very cold and controlling. The guy died three years ago. He was a hired gun (mercenary professional ). Step dad's dad was same profession.
- When she was 20 years old she was abandoned again by her mom and step dad when they left state without saying anything to her. They just left her and moved to a different state on the opposite side of the country.
- Her mom never had any saying as the step dad had all the saying in family and power. Mom never stood up for her daughter.
Although I thought I knew better I didn't want to judge book by cover and decided to date her based on the connection and chemistry we had. I took the gamble you can say.
One and half months into dating we slept for first time. Little late but I thought she likes to take it slow. When we were done she turned her back towards me in bed and froze up. Did not say anything for a minute or two... then said I should hold her. Her face looked like she was going through something really emotional or a flashback in her mind that I didn't understand at all. Soon after she was leaving she started crying outside the car and said " This is all so real now" and that she can't be with me. It's like intimacy triggered something and it all started collapsing from here on.
Few days later we got back together but that was a mistake because no matter how I tried to talk to her we had constant fights and she was pushing me away. We ended up breaking up month later leaving my friends and family in surprise.
Everyone thought we were perfect together and didn't see it coming.I think that her difficult childhood which I can't relate to but tried to understand by listening had something to do with the way she's going through relationships with men. She said all her relationships have been negative not a single good one. How can something that was so "perfect" end so bad so fast? Can someone shed some light on this that possible went through similar experience or has background in psychology? I really tried to listen to her and understand her needs... unfortunately she also bent my frame I have to admit that. Guys if you date a girl and she has such past think twice don't let her good looks, her charming personality fool you. This could have been worse then it was but it left me confused as I'm still thinking about it one and half month later......