I used to be a "what you see/say is what you get" guy. Straightforward conversation. But it can bore women.

So I became REALLY good at TEASING. I'm not talking something sexual. I mean USING WORDS in MILD NEG HITS in a FUN AND CREATIVE MANNER.

It took me awhile, but im REALLY GOOD at it now. I'm known for it. I do it with most everyone and they laugh, smile, and feel comfortable around me. Here's how to do it. Dont forget, practice, practice, practice. Women cannot resist this because it creates FUN, MYSTERY, NEG HITS, and ATTITUDE into one.

1. Playful Put Downs. I do this in OPPOSITE manner. That way it doesnt offend. With good looking people i tease their looks. With athletic people i tease their clumsiness.
HER: Have you heard about mad cow disease?
ME: If you got it, how could anyone tell the difference?


2. Situational Put Downs:
HER: "I passed my drivers test with a 96 percent score"
ME: So you did thee points better than your IQ.


3. Conversation Put downs
HER: My dog is really smart
ME: Too bad it doesnt run in the family

If you do this correctly, theres a playful banter when you hit the exact right mood. Its an area of humor that will not offend people ifyou do it right. You'll become known as witty.

The key is to not offend anyone and do it with a sly smile.

TEST: Fill in your own answer to this one. See how funny you
can make it:

HER: I've never had a car accident.
YOU:

Maybe you should get a job so you can stop taking the bus

HER: I've never had a car accident...

ME: That's coz when the driver sees ya, they flee in terror!

No?

lol. At least i tried!

Wait till you get your driver's license.

Thats Cuz your The only one Driving on The Sidewalk!

Originally posted by NeverFear

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Heres a spoiler....




















































*Your joke sucks*.

To be sure light hearted queers here get what I mean:

1-What you wrote wasnt funny
2-What you wrote was dumb
3-What you wrote would make YOU sound like a fool
4-What you wrote is just plain insulting and runs short of becoming "funny put downs".

HER: I've never had a car accident.
YOU: So, it was always intentional?(throw a half/****y smile in with it)

Originally posted by MrBond007

*Your joke sucks*.

To be sure light hearted queers here get what I mean:

1-What you wrote wasnt funny
2-What you wrote was dumb
3-What you wrote would make YOU sound like a fool
4-What you wrote is just plain insulting and runs short of becoming "funny put downs".

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MrBond007,

You're sorta right...everythin' depends on delivery. It has to fit your personality. One person could say it and sound like a d**k, but another person could say it and make it sound funny as f**k.
If it ain't in your personality then you need to find a different part of your game to spit instead of crashin' and burnin' on a good joke that came out the wrong way or at the wrong time.

DELIVERY

Peace[

I was thinkin slong the lines of...

"So whats with the funny walk then?"

everything else that came to my mind might get me slapped big time......

Being a comedy writer for years I can shed some authentic perspective on this one. All that you've discovered Neverfear is a specific method of humor. The method is not the magic though, it's humor in general any way you put it. You just happen to be efficient in this "putdown opposites" technique of humor. Whenever my girlfriend tries to be pushy I'll act like an over the top complete servant for a couple minutes to let her know I object to her ordering me around. I'll say "You want a drink honey? I'll make a personal pan pizza for you. Of course I'm eating too. I'm eating your personal pan pizza for you. I wouldn't want you to hurt your arm feeding yourself." It's one of the least insulting/putdown avenues possible in the circumstance. We both get a good laugh and she gets the point. Another technique is to start telling a story as if it really happened in mixed company relating to the topic they started and then right in the middle of it introduce incredible and bizarre twists that couldn't be true in a million years. Do it with a completely stone straight face. When they reject the story as false act like you don't understand why they don't believe you with body language only. Hands out, eyebrows up, mouth open. It only works if the story is completely incredible though. It can't seem like you were actually trying to fool them. Then they just think your a liar. There are many many disarming comedy techniques that work beautifully. Don't make the mistake of thinking that all the world of humor is a putdown. You'll limit your potential. Maybe you should try to expand your arsenal instead.

Originally posted by Rondavu
Being a comedy writer for years I can shed some authentic perspective on this one. All that you've discovered Neverfear is a specific method of humor. The method is not the magic though, it's humor in general any way you put it. You just happen to be efficient in this "putdown opposites" technique of humor. Whenever my girlfriend tries to be pushy I'll act like an over the top complete servant for a couple minutes to let her know I object to her ordering me around. I'll say "You want a drink honey? I'll make a personal pan pizza for you. Of course I'm eating too. I'm eating your personal pan pizza for you. I wouldn't want you to hurt your arm feeding yourself." It's one of the least insulting/putdown avenues possible in the circumstance. We both get a good laugh and she gets the point. Another technique is to start telling a story as if it really happened in mixed company relating to the topic they started and then right in the middle of it introduce incredible and bizarre twists that couldn't be true in a million years. Do it with a completely stone straight face. When they reject the story as false act like you don't understand why they don't believe you with body language only. Hands out, eyebrows up, mouth open. It only works if the story is completely incredible though. It can't seem like you were actually trying to fool them. Then they just think your a liar. There are many many disarming comedy techniques that work beautifully. Don't make the mistake of thinking that all the world of humor is a putdown. You'll limit your potential. Maybe you should try to expand your arsenal instead.

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I actually learned something reading this.