LOL...good stuff. I love this forum.
You don't go to a nightclub to meet a church-girl. Period.
Nor do you go to a nightclub to find a bride. You CAN...my sister met my brother-in-law at a bar...but then again, you shouldn't be "looking for a bride" in the first place. It's that approach to women that is going to cause you some misery.
Nightclubs are great places to meet women out to have a good time. Some will f**k on the first night, some will f**k after a date or two. If you're not worried about some arbitrary "quality" standard, you can at least go out and enjoy yourself.
I have a feeling you're probably trying to hard to "make conversation". Nightclubs are all about a fun attitude, first and foremost. If you're sitting there trying to make boredom-conversation, just throwing boring getting-to-know-you questions at her in a monotone voice, you're going to annoy the bejeezus out of her VERY quickly.
I dunno which of these "professionals" it was who was always talking about the "Wooooo!!" attitude, but you have to have that in the club. Your conversation, your kino, etc...should revolve around that. If you're not immediately connecting with a girl, don't sit and try to talk to her until you hit on something that interests her...bounce to the next girl. And the next one.
You're there to enjoy YOURself first and foremost. If you go the whole night without a single number, kiss, or sexual act, but you talk to a few women, have a few laughs, and enjoy yourself, then you've succeeded.
"Out" at the club is the time to be a little more daring than usual as well. Act like you are "the sh!t" until you believe your own BS. I used to like trying to get women to buy me drinks. Sometimes they would. Sometimes they look at me like I'm nuts and walk away. I don't give a damn...it's funny, and 2 drinks in, I honestly BELIEVE that THEY are the "crazy" ones.
Don't announce yourself and your intentions to the ladies with words. Use eye contact. Lock eyes with her, hold it, and SMILE. If she smiles back, make your way and start talking to her. Don't sit and stare without saying anything...it makes them nervous. In a loud bar or club, eye contact says much more than your words will.
Bust on her like she was your little sister. Have fun with it. Don't insult her...that's not a "neg". Negs are friendly, subtle poking-fun.
Treat her like you've ALREADY been in her pants. Don't be afraid to put an arm around her or talk some crap. Don't be afraid to BS a little...women expect you to exaggerate or act-out a little. As long as you don't get too over-the-top, she will roll with it.
Again, don't be rude or vulgar, but act casual, like this is someone you know. She will fall in line. Or you'll move to the next girl.
Don't worry about "getting caught" in a "move". If you try to do something Don-Juannish, some kino trick or some line, and she busts you on it, just keep rolling like it's the most natural thing in the world. It's only unnatural if you freak out when she busts you. Just like kino is only unnatural if you ACT like it is.
If she hangs out, makes good eye-contact, and shows interest in being in your presence, see what you can get away with kino-wise. An arm around the waist is a good pivot to other touching. If she seems to be getting comfortable to you, just let your arm drape down to her hip. An arm around the hip (not on her arse, on the side of her hip) is somewhere between the casual waist-touch and the more intimate arse-touch...it's a subtle way of "taking possession" of her lower body. If she's uncomfortable, she won't make a scene, she'll just squirm back a little...give her her space and come back to it later, or bounce to the next girl.
If she's sitting next to you and leaning in, the arm-touch is a good "first kino". If she's cool with that, a hand on the thigh is the "intermediate kino".
As far as dancing is concerned...if she wants to dance/grind with you, try to follow her hips. All women think they can dance...maybe 25% of them can even follow a beat. But if you're following the beat and she isn't, SHE will think YOU can't dance, so hands on her hips and follow her rhythm. And keep your hips over your legs so your knees don't get in the way. If you start getting wood from grinding on her, just go with it. Again, it's only unnatural if you ACT like it is. She knows you want to hit it...don't be embarrassed about it. Only a chump is embarrassed at the fact that he wants to bang women.
If she has to go before you close the deal, or you're getting bored and want to bounce, pull out your phone and let her put her number in. If she doesn't, don't stress. You've been engaged with her all night and having fun...if you don't get to bang her, no big deal. Again, you're out there to have a good time...and the ladies are there to facilitate that. Not in their minds, of course, but the truth is you have "mutual objectives".
If she kicks out some lame excuse, just laugh and keep moving. But remember, ANY good looking girl is going to have a "boyfriend" at any given moment. But if she's still at the club, and you find/match her "vibe", she may just forget about her "boyfriend" for the night. I've seen it happen many times.
One thing I haven't mentioned yet as far as clubs are concerned. There are actually TWO key points to having fun with the ladies at the club.
The first I've gone on at length about...the ATTITUDE. The desire to just have a good time and the ability to "control the frame" and make women part of YOUR good time, instead of RELYING on their responses to you to determine your level of enjoyment.
The second...you have to LOOK GOOD. No one is going to spot you across a crowded night club and think, "Hey...nice personality!" Especially with women in groups, if you look good, if you carry yourself confidently, if you dress nice, they will want you involved in their night. If you look "average", if you're dressed down or you slouch or you are unkempt, they'll likely group you with the "just out with my girls-not interested" guys.
You don't have to be in a suit, but wear some nice jeans or slacks, some clean shoes. If you're into the designer stuff, do that. If you're gonna "dress like a rockstar", dress like a famous rock-star, don't just grunge down.
Get your fat arse into shape. Shave, cut and style your hair, get some good cologne. Walk tall...step from your hips. SMILE. Don't fidget. Act like you own the place and don't be afraid of showing off a little.
You can look in the mirror and know when you're giving off that sexy-vibe that women like. When you go out at night to a club, you can look around and see a dude and can tell, "Ladies are gonna dig this dude...I can't compete". That's the vibe that YOU want to give off when you look at yourself in the mirror.
That's all I can think to tell you about the bar/club scene. I know it's awkward when you try to put it into action...I've always had a drink or two and then it seems to flow naturally. So try not to think so much.