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HER: Men are scum, blah blah blah ME: You know, if you spend less time b!tching, you'd have a lot more time to cook me breakfast. or HER: I swear I'm going to turn lesbo, blah blah blah ME: When you do, can I watch? I'll just sit in the corner and observe. With a webcam.

****y/funny option: Q: What do you look for in a Woman? A: I want a woman who's waist high, with a flat head I can rest my drink on.

I wish I realised the full extent of this when I started college. As I told a neighbor of mine (16 yrs. old): "Ditch the Abercrombie sh*t. Every dumb slacker mooching off mommy and daddy wears that stuff. " He rolled his eyes, but I told him that I've gotten probably 5x more looks now...

"To quote Paul and Young Ron.."The only men who wear moustaches nowadays are firemen and gay men" lol" So basically only hose-handlers can have a moustache? ROFL...I thought I was the only one who had noticed that! To wear a moustache, you must fit one of three categories: 1) Roughly 45+...

I can say with complete confidence that there is tons of quality tail in College Station. And "conservative" isn't quite the word I have in mind, it's more like "traditional"...oddball school traditions like not sitting down at football games and lighting ludicrously big fires that is, not...

What kills me about the fatties is how they will go on and on about all the weight loss stuff they've done. Two ladies at my office went on and on about all the silly aerobics and gadgets and whatnot that they've done. It's almost like they are doing token workouts/diets, to repent for their...

(the conversation is odd jobs we've had:) Me: ...yeah, I even tried acting for a bit. Didn't work out though. Her: Oh? What kind of acting? Me: Well, I went to california and auditioned for some adult movies. (said nonchalantly, with deadpan expression) I didn't get called back...

Plotting for months and months to formulate an elaborate scheme for vengeance on par with The Count of Monte Cristo, all on account of a dumb cvnt? Petty. Sad. Childish. Shows obsession--AFC. Coming up with a quick response off the top of your head which both gets her back AND lets her...

Did anyone ever watch that cheesy show "Temptation Island"? I only saw part of one episode...they were introducing the bachelors, and one guy was a massage therapist. The ladies reaction to this bit of information was quite favorable as I remember, lol.

I am a whopping 6'6", with (told more than once) "beautiful blue eyes". Trust me, this *in and of itself* means nothing. To be honest, I'd gladly trade 6" of height for 50 lbs. of muscle. Muscle is something you CAN improve and IMO, seems to matter a lot more than height. My brother is...

I was thinking exactly the same thing recently. If you've never watched wrestling, try and catch a show when "The Rock" is performing. (Or is he even back from making Scorpion King 2? Yuck!) If you absolutely detest wrestling, he is generally on during the last 15 minutes or so, just like...

If you are the sort of guy who is often percieved as someone who will do anything as long as there is a token "please" thrown in, saying a flat "no"--with no followups or lame excuses, just plain "no"--will make a lot of people look like rabbits caught in headlights, lol. Then the next thing...