Recent content by gov87

First off, I used to be on these forums daily and they helped me get to where I am now after many years of being clueless. It's good to drop in and see things still going here. While I'm confident in myself in most situations now, I am still learning. Which brings me here to ask a question...

Focus on YOU and the girls will follow. This focus on YOU is for YOU, not them. Shyness is just fear. It's okay, we've all been there. But tell me this, why are you shy? What is there to fear? Rejection, you might say. My friend, embrace rejection. It is one of the greatest gifts...

It sounds like to me you're still missing something within yourself. You don't quite know what it is, but you can sense it. Looks like you've really figured out the whole spinning plates theory but what now? I think you're on the right track, just keep asking yourself questions and exploring...

Haha thanks for the advice guys. That's what my gut was telling me and it's nice to get the confirmation here.

A new girl I started hanging with a couple weeks ago seems to be getting attached. She's a really cool girl from what I've seen so far- her sense of humor is like a guy, she's cooked me dinner, and seems to get things for the most part. However, her compliments to me are becoming more frequent...

That helps. Thanks for taking the time to post that, my friend. There's always something new I'm learning about myself and thought process that is and has been wrong for so long. When I get over one barrier, I find another but being able to realize this, challenge it, and then change it has...

Thanks for the post buddy. I meant "let her decide" as me telling her we can continue hanging out but not to expect anything or we would just go back to normal. Also, getting used to what you said and I bolded above in your post.. man, it is hard. lol. Getting used to the mindset that...

Great advice Mike just posted here... If this has started early in the relationship as he mentioned, get out. Trust me, it will only get worse and she will sabotage things and drag you down with her. However, if it's just a few times and it's occurred after a while of dating, I think your...

I agree especially with the last part. She has clearly put herself out there and I don't know what the heck to do bc I don't know what I want. Normally, I would beat myself about not knowing what I want which I consider to be AFC behavior. However, to continue to change my patterns in a...

Thanks for your post and you're seeing the situation for about exactly what it is, I believe. Here's the thing about her, she seems really cool like the girl you had history with. I've known her for 6 years and I'm pretty sure she can remain cool and the potential for an end result similar...

She's attractive but I know I can get more physically attractive girls. It's just I don't want her starting to like me a lot and cause drama at work or with our friendship.

Oh ok, I gotcha man. You're correct that anything toxic should be kept at a distance, especially at this time of rebuilding yourself the right way. Sounds like you're on the right track with this problem. Keep us posted.

haha it's not a question of will she want it again or not because she certainly does. I got a text last night from her, "I can't stop thinking of doing you in the shower right now" It's pretty much there when I want it, I know this. However, I do not exactly know if I should.

Completely with you on this one man. Here's the thing, I never cared about being friendzoned by her or not bc we're just friends. She's pretty much like one of my guy friends. I don't even care about losing her as a person to mess around with, i have plenty of other options. The only way I'd...

Z! Good to see you're still posting AND progressing. The relationship with your mother sounds pretty annoying. It sounds similar in some ways to mine with my father so hopefully I can understand a bit better. It looks and prob feels like your mother is working against you. I think you...