Vasectomy Is Tomorrow/Opting Out

[Tenacity]

So guys it's finally here, my Vasectomy Appointment is scheduled for tomorrow morning at 11:00 a.m. I did the consultation earlier this month, the doctor indeed tried to talk me out of it, but after giving him the total rundown, he finally went forward with the agreement to do the procedure.

Question: Would I have been a great Father?

Answer: I don't know, the main question in my opinion would have been - COULD I have been ALLOWED to be a Father?

I honestly did not, do not and will never believe that I will find an American woman that I can build something with for the long term. And picking a surrogate mother isn't going to work because I actually need a woman's help to do the child rearing/nurturing.

When I'm talking about building something, I'm talking building a legacy, which is building wealth together and passing that wealth down to our children who will then pass it down to their children. Building a family dynasty like the Romney family, the Rockfeller family, the Bush family, Vince Mcmahon's family, etc. even if it's on a much smaller scale.

That was my original goal, and there's just no way in hell that's going to happen due to the market changes. Feminism and Gynocentrism have destroyed this goal. Getting married or making kids today just becomes a big fvcking LEGAL MESS with high priced attorneys, being cut-off from seeing your children, being called everything BUT a child of God by the chick's attorney, etc., etc.

Question: Every woman's not like that, so could I have possibly found a woman that I could have build something with?

Answer: Maybe, maybe not. Maybe I could find someone who I think is the woman I can build with, but later on down the line she FLIPS and I'm dealing with a Hulk Hogan divorce type of situation. Which is a situation to where after 24 years my wife divorces me, TAKES everything, and I'm forced to damn near start over.

So I'm opting out. Opting out of Marriage and Opting out of Making Children.

I will leave my Legacy in the form of my Career contributions as well as Non Profit contributions, and enjoying the hell out of my life until I pass on. I hope to see at least 85, I'm 32 now, that's only 53 more years.

Civilization as we know it is crumbling anyway, my Generation (the Millennial Generation) is pretty much going to be the final Generation of America that will be able to live a SOMEWHAT sustainable lifestyle. Generations coming after us will have to deal with massive inflation due to tens of trillions in debt, massive globalization, massive robotics, and a complete and utter extreme divide between the Top 1% and the other 99%, to where the US will LOOK LIKE a dictatorship.

I will continue relations with Women, which will include friends with benefits, hookers, strippers, or "boyfriend/girlfriend" structured relationships. But there will absolutely be NO legal relations such as spousal, co-habitation, or "baby momma" relationships.

 

[Young OG]

I applaud you for doing this. I do not blame you at all. I already have a kid and do not want anymore kids. I really should do this. My dad keeps telling to get it done. I was with my kids mom for 8 years and all of a sudden she changed and started cheating. That's the problem, you can be with a woman for years and have kids with her, all of a sudden out of nowhere, they do a 180. Then your screwed. I lucked out. I have my kid during the work week and pay no child support. No courts were ever involved. Most guys didn't get as lucky as me. Your going to live a great life. Bang woman, don't marry, live it up!

 

[Desdinova]

You're going to have fun after your vasectomy. You get to figure out whether or not you want to tell chicks you had one. It makes for some interesting experiences either way. I had some bytch excitedly blow money on a pregnancy test, hoping that she was pregnant. The ones I tell get all super crazy in the bedroom. They love the idea of having the freedom to fvck without birth control, but believe it or not they'll still want to have children with you.

 

[evan12]

I wouldn't do it for that reason, you are letting women win over you by preventing you from having a happy family and offspring .
Also , unless you keep your self in shape it is hard to find women who want you without commitment unless they are hookers. so expect this commitment free relationships will end once you become an average guy .
Try at least to keep some of your semens in bank in case you want offspring .
Also you limited yourself by the area you are living , have you considered getting woman from over seas ?
You are acting out of frustration, with time you will get more depressed because you don't have any kids , and no hope to have .
remeberDesdinova already have one kid which make a big diff .

 

[amoka]

You get what you put in a relationship/life. If you want a woman to play around with, that's the kind you'll get. Your reasons for vasectomy is no different than a person who commits suicide because "life is not fair" to them. There are plenty of people that are in a good relationship, heck happily married, and did vasectomy, in fact I know of quite a few on this board that are happily married and did vasectomy. You need a better reason as to why you want to have this done.

 

[Tenacity]

My Urology doc told me that to keep the sperm in the bank, it would cost thousands of dollars to do so.

This is a major life decision but I just don't see having kids as being beneficial to me now, later, or ever.

Am I 100% sure about this? Of course not. Do I have doubts? You damn right I do. After all, I'm 32 right now and we are in the year 2015, by the time I'm 36 and we are in the year 2019 my life and even the women within it could be completely different.

I always use condoms when I have sex and will continue to use condoms (vasectomy or not) because of the STD scare. The reason for the vasectomy is because the women I sleep with I absolutely cannot get these people pregnant or they will fvck my life up royally. Condoms can break, slip off, or I can become overly horny and go raw (which I have done a couple times).

To give a little more time on this, I might call in the morning and reschedule (just make up something such as I had a new meeting that came up) until maybe the middle of November.

But my current plan is to do the vasectomy before the end of the year and if down the line in my life if I meet the SUPER, DUPER high quality woman OR if I just want a kid so bad, I will pay the additional monies (and go through the additional hell) of doing the vasectomy reversal. I honestly don't think the high quality woman exists and I don't think I will want a baby so bad. Honestly my freedom is what I've always wanted, I have that, so why would I want to mess that up?

 

[Powersurgeon]

I have three little children, I can't picture my life now without them. I'm divorced because she cheated on me. I wish I had the clarity of thougth you have before I got married. Oh, also, I had my vasectomy done one month before my twins born.

 

[Tenacity]

Yeah if I already had a kid I surely would do the Fatherly duties for it, after all it didn't ask to come here.

It's just that there's this weird feeling I have lol, I don't know what it is? Maybe it's because the actual act of getting a vasectomy is completely and utterly unnatural? Or, maybe it's something in my Soul/Spirit telling me to wait a little longer?

Here's ONE thing I'm pretty certain about, the types of women I run into will not change. Again, I meet women everywhere, from churches, to college, to online...everywhere, I continually get four types of women that I covered before:

Type One: Good financially, good interest, but looks better with her clothes on than off.

Type Two: Horrible financially, good interest, usually attractive.

Type Three: Good financially, fickle and shows mixed signals, usually at least "somewhat" attractive.

Type Four: Finances vary, but she's fickle and shows mixed signals, usually attractive, also usually displays signs of being a gold-digger.

No matter where I go to meet women, the women I GET, are always one of these Four Types. I can't build a legacy with any of these chicks. If I wanted to have a KID though, and just do the baby daddy/baby momma shyt, I would pick Type One. I believe Type One and Type Three would be/are Good Mothers. Type Two and Type Four, "just depends and varies" in terms of her good mothering skills.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Tbh with you player I know some people never have kids and they never regret it. Its very expensive, it costs around 400,000. If I pay my baby moms what she wants every month it'll be 180,000. But to be honest my son is my everything and worth every penny. If I died today I wouldnt be too mad because I have a kid that will carry the torch.

Some people want a son to take the torch and some people don't care. If you don't care get the vasectomy. If not then dont. I have my son, so in the near future I want to get a vasectomy. I never want to go through what I'm going through now. One is enough for me.

 

[glass half full]

I understand where you're coming from, really I do. I had my girl before I got the snip, marriage was fvcked but got custody. As much sh!t as I've been through, my daughter is the best thing that ever happened to me.

But we all have different lives and I totally respect your logic. It's a smart move nowadays if this is what you want, follow your heart.
And enjoy your "free" self! The freedom of busting the nut without obligations is totally worth it. Enjoy!!

 

[Desdinova]

To give a little more time on this, I might call in the morning and reschedule (just make up something such as I had a new meeting that came up) until maybe the middle of November.

I had a lot of thoughts go through my head before I got mine. Yes I already have a child, but I really did want to have more. However, I just couldn't see myself having more kids with the neglectful bytch I was married to. I figured if we split up, it would take a lot of time to find a woman I wanted to be with, spend years getting to know her, move in together, and plan having children together. But when would these kids be born? Around age 40? I don't want to be 40 years old, changing diapers, and possibly having children at home when I'm retired.

Age played a big factor into me getting a vasectomy. I just didn't want to have kids at home when I'm older and want my peace and freedom.

Tenacity, you've been thinking long and hard about this decision. I know you haven't jumped the gun on this one and you've had many, many guys on this board throw out suggestions to put it off. None of those have steered you in the other direction. You've been thinking about this and talking about it for a long time, and all you've received is more reasons to get it done.

Here I am almost 6 years out of my marriage and I haven't found a decent woman who's made me regret my decision. In fact, they've all reinforced it. My current GF has one kid and doesn't want any more, so that works well with my decision.

I'm going to do the opposite of everyone here and tell you not to cancel. Nobody should settle for a "good enough" woman to procreate with. Sadly, many women don't even make the "good enough" category. There's nothing wrong with avoiding the stress, frustration, and risk of financial ruin of getting the wrong woman pregnant, and there's plenty of wrong women to be had.

 

[YawataNoKami]

Do not tell anyone. Have a friend who did it long time ago. A lot of fun for him specially when women tell him they are pregnant.

 

[Tictac]

It's your body and your life and thus no one's business but yours. You've put some thought into this.

I had a vasectomy but after my three kids were born. It's not like it's an easy thing to raise kids. But I wouldn't trade a minute of it for all the puzzy on earth. The doc that did the procedure asked me if I was sure, if maybe when (if) another woman's was in my life that I wouldn't want to have kids with her. My answer then (and now) is 'no'. My allegiance is to the kids I have. If any woman would dump me over that, good riddance.

Your logic seems driven by what you think about women. I wouldn't (clearly didn't) get to the place you are right now. And I hope you don't regret taking yourself out of the gene pool a couple of years down the road.

But like I said, it's your body and your life.

 

[Tenacity]

Excellent oversight Des and TicTac. And good comments from everybody else.


#1.) The Final Decision

So here's the final decision. I thought about this and analyzed this once again all night (and this morning). This is in addition to all of the thought and analysis I have done over the last 3 years in relation to this. This hasn't been a willy nilly quick decision.

So the final decision is that my current plan is still the most logical and best plan for my life. That is, to get the vasectomy done by the end of the year. Because it's already scheduled, it might as well be today.

I'm a planner and IF I was going to have kids, it wouldn't be until 2019/2020 anyway because my current career structure is "ok" but it's not as structurally sound as I would like it. Over the 2016 - 2018 time period, this is when the structurally sound-ness would occur. In 2019/2020, I will be turning 36 - 37.

Here in 2015 at 32, I DO NOT want to have any kids. I have no passion nor desire for it. The decision is not primarily coming from frustrations with the quality of women, the relationship between me and "my kids" technically should have nothing to do with the quality of the relationship between me and their mother (even though we know it does legally and stress wise, but you feel my drift here).


#2.) Risk Mitigation Of The Final Decision

So the biggest risk of this is that I could get to 2019/2020 at 36 - 37 and my desires, passions, etc. in relation to being a "Daddy" could totally change! And I could just literally be shaking with over-whelming passion and desire to have a kid or two. Well, what would I do? Here's the planning:

- First Option: I will pay the extra money/go through the extra hell for the vasectomy reversal as the reversals can usually be done within 10 years with a decent success rate. It will be hell, expensive, time-consuming, and it might not even work. But that's the first option.

- Second Option: I will adopt a newborn straight from the damn hospital. I will be the first person it sees, knows, etc.

Do I think, as of today in 2015 at age 32 that in 2019/2020 at age 36 - 37 I will be shaking with DESIRE to be a Daddy? Hell no. I will be older and looking forward to continuing my path on "sitting down" in life in retirement, not going out raising kids for the next 25 years because understand, it's a 25 year committment to raise a kid, not 18. Kids don't mature nor become financially stable until they are AT LEAST 25.

But if that desire comes, I will implement the first or second option. But I want to proceed with the procedure TODAY because the chances of that desire coming is very low. And I want to protect myself from unplanned/unwanted pregnancies.

I'm still fvcking with a condom for the foreseeable future. These chicks are nasty out here. But sometimes I have fvcked raw if I'm just very horny. I won't even be attempting to fvck raw until at least 6 months after this procedure which would be around April 2016.


#3.) Being Alone

A criticism of this is that I might be alone in the upcoming years, I don't know how having kids resolves this risk. Just because you have kids does NOT mean they will be in good relationship standing with you during "old age".

But my plan to not be "alone" is to keep my social circle in place. I have friends, partners, girlfriends, business meetings, business associates, etc., how are all of these people just NOT going to be there in old age?

Plus, I will have Long Term Care Insurance and plan on using that. It's more reliable than having any "kids" I make use up their time, energy and resources to provide for their Daddy when their damn Daddy should have saved money and bought Long Term Care insurance for that.

So I'm ready....about to take this pill they have you take 1 hour before the appointment, hop in the shower, and drive on down in a minute. The Urology Center is just about 15 minutes from my Apartment here in Clinton Township lol.

 

[Tenacity]

Okay, I just took this pill (Valium) which has me dizzy as hell.

Damn this is a difficult decision and I just called them to prolong it.

I know, this seems wishy washy as hell but my current analysis is saying that I will not be making kids going forward. HOWEVER, there's this glaring time period over the next three years 2016 - 2018 as we get into that 2019/2020 period of when I was actually going to pull the trigger on making kids after my career stability.

I feel as though if I did the procedure today, I'm not allowing that additional 2016 - 2018 time period to elapse and I should at least allow that time period to elapse.

So, I'm going to prolong doing it. I just cancelled with them, they have no appointments in November and the earliest is in the middle of December, which on that date I have a damn Conference I have to attend.

So damn it, this is wishy washy as hell but here's the current updated plan:

- Current decision is still to NOT make kids

- But I will hold off on doing the vasectomy UNTIL I get through the next three years of 2016, 2017 and 2018. By the time we are at 2019 - 2020, that's when the final nail in the coffin (vasectomy) should take place because that would be do or die at that point. And there's still a POSSIBILITY that due to career structuring which will cause me maybe to move, that I could change my decision and seek birth children. Because that possibility is still there and so STRONG, I can't ignore it.

So that's the current plan, but I will continue to fvck how I've been which is through the strategic use of condoms only and when I'm getting ready to come, I always pull out and jack off the rest of the way to confirm the condom hasn't been broken.

At the end of the day, I still do not think children will be created. But the vasectomy will be officially pushed off until around 2019/2020 as that will be the end of the decision making process officially to where there's still a chance (albeit a very low chance) that I change desires and seek children.

 

[Desdinova]

I hate you

But I know this is not an easy decision to go through with. There's nothing wrong with waiting a bit.

The way I saw the reversal option: if I find a woman worthy enough to have children with (again), she can help pay for the reversal.

As for being "alone", that's what pets are for.

 

[grayclif]

Tenacity in my opinion you are just too young. Wait. This site has given you the necessary tools to upgrade yourself, find a quality woman and know what to do once you've found her.

Solidify your career and in the process the possibility of a desireable woman will present itself.

 

[Tictac]

If you have to take anxiety meds to go through with something, then it's not a smart call.

Good on you for holding off!

 

[Tenacity]

Yeah, I just want to make sure I've covered all bases here. Like I said, there's a possibility that around 2019/2010 my decision on having kids could change, as of today I honestly want NO kids. 2019/2010 I'm going to be 36 - 37 and if I'm going to have a kid or two, I'm starting to make them then. Once I hit 40, that's it period, no matter if I even decide to want kids, once I hit 40 it's a wrap.

The Urology Center does have an appointment open for December of this year, I still might take it. I have the entire month of November to do final-final analysis on this.

One thing that I'm hoping does not happen, is my condom procedure fails and an unwanted pregnancy pops up during the meantime between now and December, OR between 2016 - 2018 during the final "waiting" period. I've been extremely careful before in not making that happen, but chicks have ways to manipulate the fvck out of you which had me end up screwing a chick raw for a very short time but she damn sure got pregnant but another guy, and was trying to find me to see if I was also the potential Father. And she was eager as hell too, this chick in particular is pretty hot (to me at least) but she already had 2 kids and was like 20. Today she's going on 23 and has 5 damn kids from different guys.

So another thing I most likely won't do between now and December, OR between 2016 - 2018, is put my dyck in any chick that IF I got her pregnant I didn't think she would be a decent Mother and at least "somewhat professional" going forward with the child custody/raising of the child.

 

[dustmuffin]

Just use precautions. Don't get your nuts tied yet. I had my first child at 34. Not because I felt like becoming a father but because my ex wife got the urge to have one. Then she tricked me into having a second. I would advise all men that have one child and don't want more to get a vasectomy. Your wife will trick you into having a second. I really had no clue and was easy pickings. I'm going to get a vasectomy in the near future but I am 52.