The ramblings of a madman

[shadey]

I have been interested in pickup and self development for years now, I never before shared any of my experience or knowledge. I decided to write this journal after discovering the bible. I am only half way but i have gained incalculable knowledge and insights from it. The reason i decided to start this journal is to allow me to keep track of my life, to pickup my mistakes and take the advice that others might give. I also will be writing about whatever is on my mind, it will usually invlove self development and pickup.I am 18 years old and from South Africa. I am not totally lost when it comes to women, however i find that i am really inconsistent.
Some of the goals that I have in the next 6 months.
Gym: Bench 110kg currently 90kg
Squat 140kg currently 110kg
Deadlift 160kg currently 120kg
I need to find my passion in life, something that gets me excited in the morning.
I find that NMB is brilliant. It has made a massive difference for me and is part of the reason I found the bible and created this thread. I advise you that if you are masturbaiting more that twice a week, you may not be working at your full potenial. I am currently on day 28. I have never had so much energy before, I feel alive and motivated to get things done. A benefit I find quite helpful is that I don't feel like watching TV or playing games at all, this means i have much more time to work on myself. I personally think TV is a waste of time.
Meditation is probably the greatest thing since sliced bread. I feel that it gives me sustained concerntration and focus throughout the day. I have never felt so calm. It makes me feel as if all the worlds problems can be solved using words and just chilling. It is seriously great and I highly recommend it to all. You can look up different methods and see which is best for you, I am still exploring this area. I feel it actually helps with gyming as you are more focused and together, your thoughts are not all over the place. You have internal peace.

 

[shadey]

I would like to know does anyone else have some sort of game plan when they talk to women? I usually just say hey to start it of, or use a situational opener such as do you come here often or nice shoes. I feel the most important thing is to immediately start flirting, so that it does not become more difficult later to transition the convo from boring to fun and flirty. My favorite form of flirting is teasing, i find this most effective for me, but when taken overboard can actually cause her to lose some attraction or become irritated, so use with a bit of caution. The second form is the us mentality where i would create a sort of role play situation, but i always try to keep it to something i find fun. I try to get these two things firmly established before we move on to building more comfort, and risking the convo becoming too boring. Does anyone else have something like this that they always do first?

Approach Anxiety, I get it, its really easy, just don't be a b****, girls don't eat people. I know this is all true and I have many times overcame this anxiety, yet sometimes I still feels it gets the better of me. Those moments when you are not feeling up to talking to anyone, when your 'state' is really down, and you see a cute girl, how do you get yourself to approach? Something that i feels helps me a little, is doing things immediately, whether it be making an appointment or doing a choir or simply getting down to writing this, not allowing yourself to procrastinate becomes a habit, and when you tell your mind to talk to a girl you feel like your legs have already begun walking towards the girl. Any advice?

 

[DocFaustus]

Well, I'm certainly not a DJ. I've had good days and bad days. But the basic thing I know of is the less you care the better it goes.
When you actually focus on that cute girl you start giving too much importance and start overthinking. In my opinion I think that going to approach someone with an opener or a tactic isn't going to do you any favours in the long run. When you start talking to a guy you never talked before do you use openers ? Hell no. When talking to people for whom we have zero interest we just do, no worries, after all, we are just talking. That's why I normally just go there and talk randomly, as if they are my friends, or as if they are just someone I met before, later you will of course diferentiate, but on approach, just treat them as anyone else. I find this advice good to fix the approach anxiety, the point is not to make them demi gods with whom you need to use your secret magic spell.. no, they are normal, act normal, if it goes bad, who cares, they are just one of many.

 

[mynameisntNigel]

This thread's title got my attention! I've been looking at this site since the 8th grade (3 years ago) and I eventually joined. Personally I feel like the DJ Bible is a bit vague for my liking. But I've implemented stuff from both this site and Non-Suave articles, and I'm telling you the stuff is tricky because there are contradictions in whether or not to do this or that - even within Sosuave.com/.net!

I'm 17 and I haven't had a girlfriend yet. Haven't succeeded yet. But the current girl seems to really like me so things can get better soon!

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

I would like to know does anyone else have some sort of game plan when they talk to women?

Those moments when you are not feeling up to talking to anyone, when your 'state' is really down, and you see a cute girl, how do you get yourself to approach? Something that i feels helps me a little, is doing things immediately, whether it be making an appointment or doing a choir or simply getting down to writing this, not allowing yourself to procrastinate becomes a habit, and when you tell your mind to talk to a girl you feel like your legs have already begun walking towards the girl. Any advice?

Yeah not thinking about it is key. For me, if I don't approach a girl in the first 5 or so seconds of doing it, my brain starts firing loads of excuses for me not to do it. Basically, the longer I wait, the harder it becomes to do it until I just give up entirely. I always keep in mind that it's just for improvement, and sometimes I'm able to pull it off.

For game plan, you should check out Pimpologists' Pimpology 101 posts in the DJ bible. It's in Section F of the bible and although it seems plan and was written 15 years ago, it helps keep the conversation moving. Modify it to your liking.