The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[Carpathian]

That long? We only went out for 4 months, last month was very rocky. she has lots of options, i want some sex

Yes, that long.
Search for another woman and forget her. That's what you should be doing anyway.

 

[DamnSon]

Ignore her at all costs when reaches out as she is sure to do. Even if you do want to get back with her, ignore her for a month at least. Her sense of entitlement will drive her mad when you do this and make her want you and make her realize what she's lost. If you cave after the first message or two she will know you are easy and will resent you for it again. It's the same if a chick is 18 or 50. Educated or stupid. Deep down they are all the same, little girls who think they are princesses. She must know that you are not a toy to be thrown to the floor during her emotional tantrums.

Honestly I feel like she'd give up if I didn't answer like "take the hint" I honestly just feel like being the **** do you want? Do you want to **** or not, if not don't message me anymore lol

 

[finality]

Day 5. Probably close to 10 recycles with a BPD.

Last time I banged was 3 months ago.

Pretty much lost most of my attachment at this point but she still calls, texts, ect..

Need to put the nail in the coffin once and for all.

 

[ispep430]

It's NC day 22 , it's been hard, I've been keeping myself busy by going out and meeting new people. I have known the girl for 2 years and dated for 1. We were engaged and I was ready to purchase the ring. We've broken up multiple times, each time we ended up getting back together. I thought that things would change and we can work things out. In hind sight it would have been a lot better if I initiated NC the first time and never returned. This relationship is toxic. She can find things to criticize me even on our best weeks. I've taken her on a 3 week vacation around Europe. I've given her designer bags. She's even taken a watch from me which I treasure.

I'm moving on , and things are going to be a lot bettter.

I have a question for everyone on the forum . She still has my car that I let her drive when we were dating. How do I go about getting it back? Do I stop the NC and message her to get the car back?

 

[Roober]

Almost two months...

Decided to get completely off social media. I made the mistake of looking at her snapchat around christmas time... doh! then started thinking about her again. Journaling hard now to help get some thoughts out. The dates with other women helps at the time, but the emptiness I get when I am not talking to other women is alarming. Considering going to therapy ($20 per session through my insurance) just to help me reason things out. I feel like if I don't have a woman to talk to constantly, I get an empty feeling. I have identified it, but not exactly sure how to address it... probably comes from childhood abandonment issues.

 

[exhausted]

It's NC day 22 , it's been hard, I've been keeping myself busy by going out and meeting new people. I have known the girl for 2 years and dated for 1. We were engaged and I was ready to purchase the ring. We've broken up multiple times, each time we ended up getting back together. I thought that things would change and we can work things out. In hind sight it would have been a lot better if I initiated NC the first time and never returned. This relationship is toxic. She can find things to criticize me even on our best weeks. I've taken her on a 3 week vacation around Europe. I've given her designer bags. She's even taken a watch from me which I treasure.

I'm moving on , and things are going to be a lot bettter.

I have a question for everyone on the forum . She still has my car that I let her drive when we were dating. How do I go about getting it back? Do I stop the NC and message her to get the car back?

I know the feeling of toxic.

Contact her parent or friend who can get the message to her about the car. Stay nc as she will try to cause u emotional harm

 

[DamnSon]

It's NC day 22 , it's been hard, I've been keeping myself busy by going out and meeting new people. I have known the girl for 2 years and dated for 1. We were engaged and I was ready to purchase the ring. We've broken up multiple times, each time we ended up getting back together. I thought that things would change and we can work things out. In hind sight it would have been a lot better if I initiated NC the first time and never returned. This relationship is toxic. She can find things to criticize me even on our best weeks. I've taken her on a 3 week vacation around Europe. I've given her designer bags. She's even taken a watch from me which I treasure.

I'm moving on , and things are going to be a lot bettter.

I have a question for everyone on the forum . She still has my car that I let her drive when we were dating. How do I go about getting it back? Do I stop the NC and message her to get the car back?

Wtf of course you do. Man up, say "yo I need My ****ing car back" if she refuses we'll tell her you'll press charges

 

[Carpathian]

Respectfully, some of you need to man the fvkk up. Post 1 of this thread tells you exactly what to do. Do not contact her. DO NOT STALK HER. Can it be more simple?

 

[exhausted]

Respectfully, some of you need to man the fvkk up. Post 1 of this thread tells you exactly what to do. Do not contact her. DO NOT STALK HER. Can it be more simple?

Understood.
Can be difficult though, sadly my mind receives peace when i have reason and understanding, which i do and dont.
Life is easier for heartless people like women, who most are ****ty these days.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Understood.
Can be difficult though, sadly my mind receives peace when i have reason and understanding, which i do and dont.
Life is easier for heartless people like women, who most are ****ty these days.

exhausted, that is your reason understanding... That women can be heartly and $hitty. Now you can have peace.

 

[finality]

Alright guys I'm going to offer some hope here even though it will likely be 100% disregarded just as I disregarded the advice of previous members..but it does get better!

If you guys go back and read some of my posts I was a complete mess.. I almost wanted to kill myself because the internal dialogue was relentless and I could not shut it off. All I could think about was her.. replaying everything we did and didn't do together.. trying to find meanings in everything.. analyzing everything.. no sleep.. couldn't eat.. I was your typical heart broken washed up on the side of the road victim.

But now I'm on top of my game again.. new girl is younger, hotter, better in bed, more affectionate.. I never thought it would happen but I would keep my current girl over my ex.

NC is a must guys.. not to win her back.. but for your own health. I used NC to make her miss me/get her back.. it worked but she pulled the same **** as she did before a few months later and I was sent back to the gutter. Once its over its over. Don't make the same mistakes as I did!

I know there will be different opinions on this but I would stay away from dating other women after splitting with an ex. You want to replace your ex, especially because your ex most likely will be with another guy within a week or so of splitting but you are just replacing an old drug and with a weaker version that will just make you crave something stronger.. you ex.

Work on yourself, do the right things, stay NC. Plant the seeds and wait.. don't force it.

 

[Roober]

Alright guys I'm going to offer some hope here even though it will likely be 100% disregarded just as I disregarded the advice of previous members..but it does get better!

If you guys go back and read some of my posts I was a complete mess.. I almost wanted to kill myself because the internal dialogue was relentless and I could not shut it off. All I could think about was her.. replaying everything we did and didn't do together.. trying to find meanings in everything.. analyzing everything.. no sleep.. couldn't eat.. I was your typical heart broken washed up on the side of the road victim.

But now I'm on top of my game again.. new girl is younger, hotter, better in bed, more affectionate.. I never thought it would happen but I would keep my current girl over my ex.

NC is a must guys.. not to win her back.. but for your own health. I used NC to make her miss me/get her back.. it worked but she pulled the same **** as she did before a few months later and I was sent back to the gutter. Once its over its over. Don't make the same mistakes as I did!

I know there will be different opinions on this but I would stay away from dating other women after splitting with an ex. You want to replace your ex, especially because your ex most likely will be with another guy within a week or so of splitting but you are just replacing an old drug and with a weaker version that will just make you crave something stronger.. you ex.

Work on yourself, do the right things, stay NC. Plant the seeds and wait.. don't force it.

Good stuff! I think this is how I began to feel the last couple weeks of going out on dates. I was measuring them up to her and while I had a good time, I didn't really feel like it was making it any better. I have decided to really tone it back and just stop reaching out to the ones I have spent time with. I figure I will just let them fall by the wayside...

I am going to focus a lot more on ME! Hitting the gym 4-5 times a week, work has gotten SUPER busy as I watch everything I have created come to fruition, and I will stick with going to salsa to get out. I realized I was replacing my exes affection with the desire to talk to other women and when it wasn't there, I was longing for it. I intentionally didn't set up dates this week, just to take care of my things around the house, focus on the gym, and continue working crazy hours... bonuses are coming up, so I really want to show my best stuff..

 

[exhausted]

Good stuff! I think this is how I began to feel the last couple weeks of going out on dates. I was measuring them up to her and while I had a good time, I didn't really feel like it was making it any better. I have decided to really tone it back and just stop reaching out to the ones I have spent time with. I figure I will just let them fall by the wayside...

I am going to focus a lot more on ME! Hitting the gym 4-5 times a week, work has gotten SUPER busy as I watch everything I have created come to fruition, and I will stick with going to salsa to get out. I realized I was replacing my exes affection with the desire to talk to other women and when it wasn't there, I was longing for it. I intentionally didn't set up dates this week, just to take care of my things around the house, focus on the gym, and continue working crazy hours... bonuses are coming up, so I really want to show my best stuff..

Good focus for sure.
I have no ambition to court other women. Its an exhausting process and even more difficult when u have to fake being cheerful.

 

[exhausted]

Alright guys I'm going to offer some hope here even though it will likely be 100% disregarded just as I disregarded the advice of previous members..but it does get better!

If you guys go back and read some of my posts I was a complete mess.. I almost wanted to kill myself because the internal dialogue was relentless and I could not shut it off. All I could think about was her.. replaying everything we did and didn't do together.. trying to find meanings in everything.. analyzing everything.. no sleep.. couldn't eat.. I was your typical heart broken washed up on the side of the road victim.

But now I'm on top of my game again.. new girl is younger, hotter, better in bed, more affectionate.. I never thought it would happen but I would keep my current girl over my ex.

NC is a must guys.. not to win her back.. but for your own health. I used NC to make her miss me/get her back.. it worked but she pulled the same **** as she did before a few months later and I was sent back to the gutter. Once its over its over. Don't make the same mistakes as I did!

I know there will be different opinions on this but I would stay away from dating other women after splitting with an ex. You want to replace your ex, especially because your ex most likely will be with another guy within a week or so of splitting but you are just replacing an old drug and with a weaker version that will just make you crave something stronger.. you ex.

Work on yourself, do the right things, stay NC. Plant the seeds and wait.. don't force it.

Well said.

 

[Carpathian]

NC is a must guys.. not to win her back.. but for your own health. I used NC to make her miss me/get her back.. it worked but she pulled the same **** as she did before a few months later and I was sent back to the gutter. Once its over its over. Don't make the same mistakes as I did!

^^^^ THAT is the issue.
To all you guys pining for her back, listen up. If you are doing NC to get her back you may be successful in the short term, but you will ultimately end up even more disappointed, upset and bitter. She may come back, BUT SHE WILL PULL THE SAME STUNT AGAIN. 99.9% certain, mark my words. Been there several times and got the T-shirts. Now ask yourself, is this what you want in your life? Do you deserve better from your lover/significant other? Do you want to be walking on eggshells, tiptoeing around her moods and life? We are men here. Let it go. We are a prize to the right woman. She is the wrong woman. There will be another one soon. It may not feel that way now, but there will be.
Let it go.

 

[5chm1dd1]

^^^^ THAT is the issue.
To all you guys pining for her back, listen up. If you are doing NC to get her back you may be successful in the short term, but you will ultimately end up even more disappointed, upset and bitter. She may come back, BUT SHE WILL PULL THE SAME STUNT AGAIN. 99.9% certain, mark my words. Been there several times and got the T-shirts. Now ask yourself, is this what you want in your life? Do you deserve better from your lover/significant other? Do you want to be walking on eggshells, tiptoeing around her moods and life? We are men here. Let it go. We are a prize to the right woman. She is the wrong woman. There will be another one soon. It may not feel that way now, but there will be.
Let it go.

This is gold.

My Breakup was about 4 months ago, NC for also almost 4 months, still think about her every day but it hurts less. Guess that's what it takes to overcome your first love and relationship.

My dad told me one sentence they used to say when they were younger if a chick dumped them: "She sh@t right on your d!ck, and then in your face." pretty much sums up the situation, so f#ck her.

I admit I still have feelings for her, but even if she would reach out at that point, I'd tell her to go.... Herself.

It would break me once again I suppose, but in the long run I'll come out on top, as every guy has after being thrown in the trash like a used hanky.

 

[exhausted]

^^^^ THAT is the issue.
To all you guys pining for her back, listen up. If you are doing NC to get her back you may be successful in the short term, but you will ultimately end up even more disappointed, upset and bitter. She may come back, BUT SHE WILL PULL THE SAME STUNT AGAIN. 99.9% certain, mark my words. Been there several times and got the T-shirts. Now ask yourself, is this what you want in your life? Do you deserve better from your lover/significant other? Do you want to be walking on eggshells, tiptoeing around her moods and life? We are men here. Let it go. We are a prize to the right woman. She is the wrong woman. There will be another one soon. It may not feel that way now, but there will be.
Let it go.

True.
I have refused her back for nearly a month and had to go NC for my own health as she is bipolar. Loving when she isnt mad or upset or freaking the ****k out.
Bipolar women are tough because u love them before the episodes come flying out and then they genuinely apologoze and promise to be better. Its a tough****ing game, down right soul killing in fact but no matter what u still need to say or resolve it doesnt matter because tbese vampires have no logic. U are right NOTHING will ever change.

 

[ispep430]

I know the feeling of toxic.

Contact her parent or friend who can get the message to her about the car. Stay nc as she will try to cause u emotional harm

I'm glad I found this site. I am comforted in knowing that I am not experiencing this situation alone. I value everyone's comments. I really feel like to urge to ask her to meetup. someone please give me some opinions.

 

[ChangePages]

8 months of NC, I must say I'm ultimately proud of myself as this girl was my first love and she was BPD (which I heard was very hard) but once we broke up I promised myself I'm mentally strong enough to accomplish NC.

During the 8 months, she only contacted me once (4 months) but I ignored her.

Mind you, she branch swing a week after breaking up with me and is still with him. This new guy doesn't compare one bit to what we had, she doesn't love him and is unhappy. And I'll be there watching the downfall from a distance.

Our love was crazy, intense, the best she ever had and I do believe her on that. She craved the **** out of me like no other. She even stalked my social media every single day. Even when it was private.

Our love was so crazy that I went beyond NC and simply disappeared from her radar and blocked her from everything and I plan on keeping it that way for good. Deleted all my social media and created new ones.

She'll never find out where I am. I'll be a memory that'll keep driving her insane. Like those single mothers who have one night stands with alpha chad

When she recycles, she'll think of me. When she thinks of abandonment she'll think of me. When she sees her mistakes and regrets, she'll think of me. The one that got away. The one who disappeared.

 

[exhausted]

you'll feel even worse. don't piss on the electric fence.

Ive been fighting it too all damn day.

I know better, have unresolved questions i know i wont get answered.

I dont know how all my life one side of me is a violent, rough crazed maniac when playing sports or fierce and calculated when fighting, but the other side a tender emotional ***** asking questions about this bipolar **** instead of out banging chicks.