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If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

POF Experiment

Reyaj

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Just an observation.. I really didn't see reyaj as acting all that desperate. I also didn't see him as calling or texting incessantly.

With most of the women, he just texted back and forth 3 or 4 times. Which is pretty normal for us guys when we've just gotten a number off a girl on pof and have started texting them in an effort to get to know a bit about them and are trying to set up a date and time to meet.

Ok he did text or call a bit much with the nurse, but they had set up a time for a meeting (10pm) and even though she said she would text him back it was almost 9pm and she still hadn't done so.

These women were all flaking and I don't see how it had anything to do with reyaj texting them 3 or 4 times in an effort to get to know them better and set up a meeting time.

I can understand the advice against unnecessarily texting or calling a girl over and over again, but when you get a girl's number off pof your first text to her can't just be "hey it's me so let's meet tonight at 10pm is xxxxx place good for you?"

You need to send out a few texts to go back and forth and build some rapport, which reyaj was trying to do in order to set up a date. No guy wants to text a girl like crazy from pof that he hasn't even met, but you need a few texts. These girls are very much like most women on pof: very fickle, and they lose interest at the drop of a dime, for any reason or no reason at all.

It doesn't matter if you send only one text, three texts, or 20 texts - the results are almost always the same. Seldom will you find a girl on pof who actually reacts normally, returns your calls or texts when they say they will, and actually meet up with you.

But girls like this do exist.. and that's how you know the difference between the flakes and the good girls.
Thank you, I couldn't have explained it better myself. Trust me I do agree with the overall advice of not overdoing it.. However I do have a current theory that when it comes to online dating these girls are so inundated with messages and giving out their numbers easily (as Tenacity points out) that I think a little extra effort may be needed.

@PBAJ

I agree but you need to make her see that value. You are just another suitor to her until you prove otherwise. There needs to be some action on your end to set you apart.

@Tenacity

Great stuff!

On Paper Attraction - I agree... This actually might be the single most important thing in OLD. Might actually be why I've been more successful on Tinder lately compared to these other ones.

Take Your time - I agree with this to a degree. But what I've found is building rapport as fast as possible is better than building it slowly. The worst is wasting your time through dialogue that never amounts to anything.

Have her text/call you at closing - I have done this successfully a bit in the past. The girl needs to be really interested though... I find it easier to get their digits and I feel a lot of them still want the guy to make the first move. Still saying all that I am open to be swayed on this viewpoint...

It's a massive numbers game - Amen.... I think striking at the right time is more key than anything else.

OLD is a good tool - It can work for sure..... I think I've had more lasting success with girls I've met through other streams.
 

Reyaj

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Just an update regarding the experiment... So I basically closed my account last week.

I had 2 potential girls as per last weekend. I don't remember all the specifics of the dialogues as I don't always get to log in here right after but I'll write what I remember...

The HB 8
We traded some texts on Friday. She said she was going out with her friend.

I was tempted to call her to build rapport so I texted her "what time are you leaving"

She didn't respond for about 3 hours... around 10:30pm she texted me "sorry I fell asleep, I'm out now"
I responded 'no prob have a good time :)"

So the next day I called her around 4pm and no answer. I did not leave a voicemail and I did not send an additional follow up text. She did not respond to me either.

So Monday I texted her about 3pm "hey how was your weekend"
She responded back about a half hour later "it was good, how was yours"
I responded back about 40 mins later "it was good, work is so busy today. I tried calling you"

I called her around 9pm and no answer. I sent a text about 15 mins later "I guess you're not a talker lol"

No response from her at all and not even the next day.
So yesterday late I texted her "you don't know what you're missing ;)"
No response of course but this plate was dead anyway. (That line actually got me some responses on past plates with flat lines)

The HB7 Nurse
I think I texted her the next day asking her how her day was going and we exchanged some texts back and forth. She was quick to respond initially and then I sent a text saying "I totally forgot you were a nurse no wonder your schedule is nuts" She didn't respond for like hours... She had told me she got out around 7pm so I called her around 7:30pm or so and she didn't answer. A few minutes later she texted back saying "Yeah it is lol' I ended up calling a little later and this time we answered... We talked for maybe 15 mins or so, it went well. I told her she can text me tomorrow if she wanted.

So now we're at Friday to my surprise she texted me out of the blue with 'hey!"
We traded a few texts and she said she was out of state with her sister who is getting married soon. I asked her about the upcoming wedding etc... I asked her when she was coming home and she said tomorrow (which was saturday).
So no texts from her Saturday or anything and none from me either.
Sunday I call her late, she answers but the phone broke up a few times (bad cell connection) We end up talking a half hour later and the convo went well. I said she could text me tomrrow (Monday) if she wanted. She was like I will.

So she didn't lol and neither did I. We're near the end of Wednesday... I may for the hell of it try to ask her to meet up tomorrow. We'll see
 

Reyaj

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Just an update

So today I texted the HB7 Nurse "hey hows it going
She responds about 5 hours later "Good! getting ready to head to the gym"
I respond about 15 minutes later "Cool have a good workout. We should meet up soon, when are you free"
I purposely didn't put a question mark. So far about 3 hours later no response lol....

So that HB8 I wrote off... I noticed she appeared on my LinkedIn feed so for the hell of it i text her

'hey you appeared on my LinkedIN suggestion, must be cause I have your #. I see we have similar degrees

She responds "oh yea u should add me. Sorry I haven't been very responsive I guess i'm not a big talking on the phone person lol. I think once I know someone more then I'm more into talking on the phone"

So I basically tell her that I don't meet anyone from online unless I talk them first. We exchange some texts around how many people we met online etc... I told her I was in a relationship for years and she says the same... Yada Yada Yada... She then keeps asking me for a pic. I tell her if we talk for a few mins later I'd send one as I need to make sure she is real.

So I called her a short while ago and she answered. We talked for about 10 mins or so, it went well. But she told me towards the end of our call that she still talks to her ex and it's "complicated" but they aren't together. Obviously a red flag
 

Reyaj

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"i still talk to my ex and it's complicated" = my ex is an unemployed drug addicted scumbag who treats me like sh*t and is already raw dogging 10 other girls, but i'm still in love with him and so i let him pound me without a condom whenever he's drunk/lonely/feels like it. If me and you ever start dating, I will drop you like a used 10 lb weight at a garage sale to be with him.

I would abort. Or if anything, you know this girl is good only for one thing.
lol yeah it's definitely a deal breaker if I were to LTR her. But I'd just be looking to hit and quit it.. maybe tap it a few times if it's good lol
That being said I agree its a major obstacle... I have a theory that getting into the pants of girl's who are hung up on their ex is difficult because they will compare you to them and in their twisted biased mind you will not measure up. Still, I'm for a challenge.

I actually did ask her earlier why she broke up with him via text and she said "I was ready for moving in together and engagement and he wasn't thinking about those things"

So just an update on her.. She actually texted me out of the blue this past evening and said "I enjoyed talking to you earlier! How was your game?" (I told her I was doing a sporting activity)

I actually didn't respond because I was busy and then was hanging out with a few friends after and wasn't really focused on her. About 2 hours later she texts again "Why no response?"

I respond about a half hour later saying I am out with friends having drinks and she responds a half hour later "Thats cool I went out for drinks too. Where did you go?" I told her and then asked where she went and she responded. That was it for tonight...

So the HB7 nurse never responded to my earlier text so I texted her in the evening "guess not lol" She responded back a half hour later with "Hey! Yes we should" I responded back about 90 minutes later "so what's your schedule like lol" No response back from her thus far..
 

Solomon

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Online dating for me has been a waste of time especially the last 3 years.....Only Reason I do it is to supplement my real life game but honestly it's pointless being a minority in a white state you have to a certain look or "niche" EFF that, I rather just do me.


A buddy of mine has been having HUGE success with the "Fake sugar daddy" game and has banged over 150 HOT girls in two years. I **** you not, if he didn't have most of these girls on camera (hidden footage) I wouldn't believe it. I have tried it works but it's not my cup of tea (Guaranteed 95% success rate if you put effort into it)
 

EyeBRollin

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Don't deceive yourself! From my view, you are only really validating your lack of skill, while continually displaying insecurity.
Stop with all the unnecessary texts and phone calls!!!
Connect & set a date (with an agreed time & place). Leave her alone after that and simply allow her to enjoy the anticipation of your date. Meet & have fun. Repeat.
Repping this post eternally.

Men, it's that simple. Make a date. If she accepts, you have a chance. Show her fun. Leave her alone until you ask her out again.
 

Reyaj

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Repping this post eternally.

Men, it's that simple. Make a date. If she accepts, you have a chance. Show her fun. Leave her alone until you ask her out again.
Sounds like you both are in LTRs with each other! lol

Anyway quick update for the people who actually care about real world results...

The HB7 nurse did not respond at all yesterday. My hunch is she is probably preoccupied with one of her other hundred suitors. Most likely whoever it was told her a specific date/place/time and she accepted. Damn I wish I was alpha followed that advice! lol Anyway aside from that sarcasm I'll probably text her something snarky for the hell of it in the next day or so.

I texted the HB8 yesterday asking what she was up to this weekend. She said she had plans to go away on a ski trip but it fell through, she asked what I was doing and I told her I was busy with a friend's bday. Maybe I'll call her in a few days. All these experiments take a back seat to my real LTR although I can't expect those fixated on "lowering my value" to ever comprehend that.
 

Reyaj

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Quick update...

So today I texted that HB7 Nurse "you're wasting your time btw"

Well she responded quick "wasting my time?"

I responded an hour later "yeah with whoever else you are talking to ;)"

She responded quick! "oh lol.. I'm seeing that may be true"
She then texted "well I'm off today and tomorrow then I leave for vaca Wednesday and won't be back till next week"

I respond about 6 hours later "our timing has been a bit off, I'm actually out of the area the rest of the week. How about on Monday"

She responded quick "back from where?"

I respond "city"

She responds "Monday next week will be perfect! You free to chat?"

I respond "you mean on the phone?"

She responds about 25 mins later "yes"

I respond about 30 mins later " maybe in like an hour"

No further response from her, and I got busy so didn't even call her. I guess she is still potential.

I texted that HB8 early in the day "I hope you're not working today :)"

No response!

I texted her back about 6 hours later "nice lol"

No response... Its kind of funny how these 2 plates keep changing their relevancy on my rotation.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Online dating for me has been a waste of time especially the last 3 years.....Only Reason I do it is to supplement my real life game but honestly it's pointless being a minority in a white state you have to a certain look or "niche" EFF that, I rather just do me.


A buddy of mine has been having HUGE success with the "Fake sugar daddy" game and has banged over 150 HOT girls in two years. I **** you not, if he didn't have most of these girls on camera (hidden footage) I wouldn't believe it. I have tried it works but it's not my cup of tea (Guaranteed 95% success rate if you put effort into it)
Lmao how does that work?

I don't think I'd ever pretend to be no ones sugar daddy. I actually need me a sugar momma.
 

Reyaj

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Update for today..

So HB8 texts me this morning "Sorry I didn't see this.. yea I did have off yesterday it was great. How was your weekend?"

I text back about an hour later "Weekend was good back to the grind this week though. Anything good for lunch?"

She responds 20 mins later "Leftover Pasta.. what about you?"

I reply 10 mins later "chicken also left over"

She responds 5 mins later "yum!!"

About 2 hours later she randomly texts me "I am ready for a nap now lol"

I respond an hour later "me too lol, I have to work late tonight though which sucks, I will try to give you a call later"

She responds 20 mins later "that stinks how late" and then "ok"

So I called her around 9pm and no answer. I texted her about an hour later "tried calling you, hope you have a good night"
(Yes I know that wasn't necessary but stfu lol)

So the HB7 nurse... as I said I didn't call her yesterday as I told her.... so tonight I called her after trying to call the HB8 and no answer. I texted back about 20 mins later "Tried calling you. Hope you have a good trip"

She texted me back 20 mins later "Thank you :)"

I may text her at some point later this week and ask if she is still good to meet up on Monday. Not holding my breath on either of these plates though.
 

Solomon

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Lmao how does that work?

I don't think I'd ever pretend to be no ones sugar daddy. I actually need me a sugar momma.
What's good bruh


man I posted the link I can't give the game away for free, well I sorta did PM me and i fill you in

But trust bruh if you looking to cop n blow SWIFTLY it can be done

My boys when to ATL and smashed 8 dimes EACH in 3 days, the hustle real!

But on another note, it's to much work because you trying to get the ***** at the lowest rate
 

Reyaj

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Update

I end up calling the HB8 around 6pm on Wednesday and she answered. We talk for about 10 mins, she mentions joining a new gym or some bs. I tell her I was about to go to the gym myself.

So around 9pm or so she texts me out of the blue "Hey how was the gym?"
I was busy so I texted her back at like 11pm "it was good"

So yesterday around 1pm I text her "Hey what are you up to tomorrow"
She responded back fairly quickly "Hey I am actually going back home for the weekend" (she meant where her family is and she moved from recently)
I responded "That sucks lol" and then "just kidding, we could have met up
She responded back quick "maybe next weekend?"

I did not respond because I got tied up and honestly forget till late.

So today I texted her "tgif!"
She responded back a few hours later with a smiley face.

So my action here will be to call her next week and try to set something up. I am sure she is seeing her ex this weekend though.

So the HB7 Nurse... I decide to text today
"hows the weather there"
She responded back a little while later "beautiful!"
I respond back a little later "jealous its cold here lol"
She responded back like an hour later "yea I'm not looking forward to coming home"

Anyway in our dialogue before she went away she mentioned meeting on Monday. I may text her Sunday to ask her if we're still on.
 

ubercat

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Arrgh an experiment is where you have a hypothesis and test it under a variety of conditions. to make it work you need a decent sample size. so if you spam message enough chicks on POF to get 20 in play - might take months. So 10 u try building rapport and 10 u push for a date after a Max of say 5 messages and record the result - you may learn something. if you do the same thing over 6 months with a sample size of 50 woman you will definitely learn something. that is an experiment. what I am seeing on this thread just looks like blue pill wishful thinking.
 

skinnyguy

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Lol OP your text game is horrible. You sounded so desperate with that girl who came back from the gym.... It was obvious she didn't want to go out with you that night yet you kept badgering her to go out.

You're clearly very desperate as you message 55 low quality women on POF every day. You need to work on your status and become more attractive because clearly right now women just aren't into you.
 

vorbis

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OP at least you have persistence :)
Personally I would think you're being too pushy but to each their own.
HB8 and HB7 haven't completely flaked on you so there's still some potential chance of meeting up with them.

One thing I would say, what's with scheduling first meet ups at times like 10pm??
Maybe this is a younger generation thing (I'm 33) but that seems way too late for someone you're meeting for the first time.
I'd agree with other posters that you should be more definitive about making plans.
Suggest an actual place at an actual time (earlier than 10pm!).
 

Yewki

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I spoke to first HB7 on the phone late last night. The convo went well and I ended the call after about 15 mins. She texted me right after saying it was nice talking to me. I told her we should meet up for coffee today before work. She stopped responding for about 30 mins after she had been quick to text replies beforehand. I messaged her "or not lol" She responded back about 5 mins later saying "sorry I was in the shower, yes I would :)" I told her I was going to bed and I'd text her tomorrow.

So I texted her today and she responded back kind of fast saying "Good morning" I asked her what she was doing and she said "grabbing coffee now then hanging out with my girlfriend" I responded back "Nice you should grab one with me later :)" Well its been over an hour and no response. I might just tell her forget it.....
Your mistakes are in bold. You were clingy and smothered her with attention. After talking on the phone for 15 minutes, you were then texting about a coffee date. The next day, even more texting and trying to get her to grab coffee. Slow way down. Stop texting so much.

Called 2nd HB7 after 11pm, she didn't answer. I texted her today saying I called her and she said she fell asleep at 9:30pm lol. I asked her what she was doing today and she said she worked till 7:30pm. I texted her "thats not too bad, we should meet up later" So far no response lol
Don't call after 11pm. Stop trying to do small talk over text. Don't ask what she's doing and if she's available, specifically tell her what you want to do. Not "we should meet up later"

Called HB8.5 yesterday and she didnt answer. Same follow up today via text, she said she worked 12 hour days and was sleeping. I told her I got in late yesterday.... I told her we should meet up later and she responded "Damn you move quick lol" I responded "I guess I've always been ambitious ;)" She responded back with "Nice lol Do you have any more pics" She has basically been texting me asking me for more pics. I called her out and said "wow you seem to be all about looks lol" She said she had bad experiences with people not being who they said blah blah
Be specific and more commanding on what you want to do. Give her the opportunity to enter your world. But instead you're acting as though you have nothing going on and are bored.
 

Reyaj

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Arrgh an experiment is where you have a hypothesis and test it under a variety of conditions. to make it work you need a decent sample size. so if you spam message enough chicks on POF to get 20 in play - might take months. So 10 u try building rapport and 10 u push for a date after a Max of say 5 messages and record the result - you may learn something. if you do the same thing over 6 months with a sample size of 50 woman you will definitely learn something. that is an experiment. what I am seeing on this thread just looks like blue pill wishful thinking.
I agree for the most part. My real upcoming thread regarding my entire experience with women (or at least why my memory allows me) will be much more battle tested. You can look at my initial approach journal in my signature which will be the start of my theorizing.

So anyway another quick update. That nurse girl is basically gone. I texted her Sunday/Monday and no response and basically ended up telling her off. I texted HB8 on Sunday evening, she responded and I told her I was hung over. I texted her today and she responded, I told her I'd call her after I got back from a work function. I called like at 9pm or so and no answer. I'm just going to text and go for a meet. If not I'm going to just end this here and start writing my culmination of all my experience with theories.

FWIW I have a real LTR which takes precedence over all this. Hence the reason a lot of my actions are care free and for experimental sake. In my real upcoming thread there will be a lot of data when I had more time and liberty to date.
 

Reyaj

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Be specific and more commanding on what you want to do. Give her the opportunity to enter your world. But instead you're acting as though you have nothing going on and are bored.
I agree with this once rapport and interest is established. However considering those girls have tons of orbiters and suitors, as Espi says initial effort to get their attention is required. I don't usually run my game like this though, was just trying to get these girls out using the least amount of time investment. As I stated above I am with someone that trumps all this cyber trash.
 

Yewki

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I agree with this once rapport and interest is established. However considering those girls have tons of orbiters and suitors, as Espi says initial effort to get their attention is required. I don't usually run my game like this though, was just trying to get these girls out using the least amount of time investment. As I stated above I am with someone that trumps all this cyber trash.
Because they have tons of orbiters, is precisely why you don't try to build rapport through texting. You become another orbiter. Her initial interest was established when you got the number.

You know the saying, better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt? The more you try to build rapport through texting the more she realizes you're a fool, basically. You confirm she is a high priority in your life. You ruin the mystery. You become just another boring guy seeking her attention... and she loses interest.
 

nismo-4

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When you use online dating, use the one strike rule. Flakes? Backs down when you go for the number or meetup? Just wants attention? Delete her ass. Don't be an orbiter. She won't miss you.
 
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