Well , I'm going to make quite a long post explaining everything i made wrong in high school and how I plan to fix it .. of course given that I failed miserably in everything in high school I don't know how this will work for me
To start off , I have moderate/high social anxiety , I am scared to talk to new people , It becomes less after a while of meeting them but really it remains there .. I am afraid to talk to my friends a good part of the time (even though I have known them for like 4 years) , I am in a group chat and I barely even say anything there and I am silent most of the time .. I talk to them like once or twice a month and that's about it , none of them really asks for me or starts texting me .
I do want to talk to them but I have nothing to say other than (hey , how is life going?) and ask them the same basic stuff and that's it .. I literally can't open any topic , I get too scared to talk about anything .
That's for the guys , It doesn't even come close to that with the girls ...
I literally don't have any friend who is a girl , and I probably might not be able to have one right now
, I can't talk to them , even when I do get the guts to say something to them it's so cringe .. I don't even have a single number of a girl
I had a crush on a girl .. so as an idiot i kept texting her on FB and barely talked to her , If you saw the conversations i had with with her your eyes will BLEED from the cringe .. I kept texting her like 20 times and never got a reply .. and I still have a crush on her and i know I have no chance of winning her I guess or any other girl in school considering she spread the word most likely .
I come from an arab country , so , even if a girl liked me , nothing would really happen at all , even if we both wanted to .. there's no where for us to do anything , I'm 18 years old
I have approach anxiety , I still can't talk to girls and given where i come from , there's no ''100 approaches'' **** .. so , i would like to know if someone has another approach to getting rid of this
I used to be a nerd (at least i was good at something) but I failed badly last year and my scores fell from 99 % to like 95-96 % because i took the wrong approach to socializing that I stopped caring about school
What I'll do :
1- Hit the gym , try to reduce body fat percentage from 25% to 12-15 % and gain some lean mass in the process , try to increase my testosterone levels as much as I can
Time taken to reach this goal : 4 months
2- Raise my grades to about 99% again
3- Start reading books (Two books a week should be good) I'm interested in physcology and sociology mostly so if anyone has any recommendations please put them ,
4- Stop fapping
5- Work on my style
6- Destroy all forms of anxiety and be confident and have no fear
7- Expand my social circle
8- Start practicing soccer 3 times a week
9- Make a diary , this will include all my failures and successes and help me when I read them later
10- Go out with people at least 3-4 times a week
11- Learn to stand up for myself
That's about it .. although I don't know how to deal with my anxiety and how to become social and increase my confidence , so , can you give me some advice on how to deal with them ? or , if you were anxious before , how did you get rid of the anxiety ?
and could I get most of these goals be achieved within 3-4 months ? or would it generally take longer ?
To start off , I have moderate/high social anxiety , I am scared to talk to new people , It becomes less after a while of meeting them but really it remains there .. I am afraid to talk to my friends a good part of the time (even though I have known them for like 4 years) , I am in a group chat and I barely even say anything there and I am silent most of the time .. I talk to them like once or twice a month and that's about it , none of them really asks for me or starts texting me .
I do want to talk to them but I have nothing to say other than (hey , how is life going?) and ask them the same basic stuff and that's it .. I literally can't open any topic , I get too scared to talk about anything .
That's for the guys , It doesn't even come close to that with the girls ...
I literally don't have any friend who is a girl , and I probably might not be able to have one right now
, I can't talk to them , even when I do get the guts to say something to them it's so cringe .. I don't even have a single number of a girl
I had a crush on a girl .. so as an idiot i kept texting her on FB and barely talked to her , If you saw the conversations i had with with her your eyes will BLEED from the cringe .. I kept texting her like 20 times and never got a reply .. and I still have a crush on her and i know I have no chance of winning her I guess or any other girl in school considering she spread the word most likely .
I come from an arab country , so , even if a girl liked me , nothing would really happen at all , even if we both wanted to .. there's no where for us to do anything , I'm 18 years old
I have approach anxiety , I still can't talk to girls and given where i come from , there's no ''100 approaches'' **** .. so , i would like to know if someone has another approach to getting rid of this
I used to be a nerd (at least i was good at something) but I failed badly last year and my scores fell from 99 % to like 95-96 % because i took the wrong approach to socializing that I stopped caring about school
What I'll do :
1- Hit the gym , try to reduce body fat percentage from 25% to 12-15 % and gain some lean mass in the process , try to increase my testosterone levels as much as I can
Time taken to reach this goal : 4 months
2- Raise my grades to about 99% again
3- Start reading books (Two books a week should be good) I'm interested in physcology and sociology mostly so if anyone has any recommendations please put them ,
4- Stop fapping
5- Work on my style
6- Destroy all forms of anxiety and be confident and have no fear
7- Expand my social circle
8- Start practicing soccer 3 times a week
9- Make a diary , this will include all my failures and successes and help me when I read them later
10- Go out with people at least 3-4 times a week
11- Learn to stand up for myself
That's about it .. although I don't know how to deal with my anxiety and how to become social and increase my confidence , so , can you give me some advice on how to deal with them ? or , if you were anxious before , how did you get rid of the anxiety ?
and could I get most of these goals be achieved within 3-4 months ? or would it generally take longer ?