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How to Approach a group of girls?

Nino-Tk

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Hello amigos I'll get straight to the point...Back in the my AFC days I would never even try approaching a girl...then i found this site,and since then my life has turned around...the key word being LIFE,not just girls...I mean i just passed and i'm goin to grade 11..everything is good thanks to this site,and I'm just 16..so my question to my fellow older Don Juans is " I never hesitate to approach a girl that I like,but now its the holidays and I'm visiting my cousin...the girls here are so different from the ones in my hood...they literally chill together as a GANG...and i dont know why,but i feel so immobolized..anyone got advice for a young DJ on what to do?
 

Lexington

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Groups can present a challenge if there's one girl in particular that you're after. It's tough to get something going with a girl in a group setting. You have to first open the entire group and be friendly with everyone. Make sure you've taken the time to interact with everyone. Then you can eventually start to focus more attention on the girl you're after. Finally, you should try and isolate her. If you have been nice to everyone in the group, the other group members won't have an issue with you taking her away.
 

Nino-Tk

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Yo guys thanks for advice...It really worked well,anyway this is what went down

So I'm bored and I decide to go see a friend,on the way there this GIRLY I want is finally alone
ME:HI can I ask you Something
GIRLYL:hi Oh and you can ask me later
ME:eek:h you i guess you need to take bath now
GIRLY:*Smile* *NOD*
As you can see nothing special happened here

So now I'm back from my friends house,I'm tired so I decide to chill outside the house...and something weird be happenin GIRLY's
friends keep on passing by my house,but I couldn't be bothered,until such a time the chill right across me on the pavement
so I,In a slow,relaxed tone TELL them I'm coming to chill with 'em Because they seem bored and it's obvious they want a piece of me,
agreed.But GIRLY practically ran away when she heard I'm coming over,Strange I know.
Lets just say my ****Y-FUNNY-CONFIDENT-HAPPY attitude makes em warm to me so much that they told me that GIRLY likes me...Can
you Believe it...I guess thats why she acting like this...
anyway tomorrow Ima speak with her and see if she'll IMPRESS me
Thanks DON JUANS
LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE
 

nyc123

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I'm bringing back this thread because I was having trouble with this recently but I don't think I've found the answer.
Two stories- I saw 6 Asian girls sitting at some couches at a lounge/bar. I felt the urge to approach. I opened directly with something like "hey excuse me, I know this is really random but I saw you girls just now and thought you were really cute and I wanted to come meet you"
They looked at each other and about 4 seconds later one of them tells me that they're leaving soon. I exit the set.

Story 2- I'm at Central Park and I see 4 Korean girls hanging out on the lawn. I wanted to approach but I didn't know how. I didn't want to go hard direct like I did in the first story. I thought I could try something indirect like try to ask them about some Korean language matters. They left before I approached. Too unsure and too much approach anxiety.

Speaking to some of my Korean friends who know Korean girls well, they said that this approach idea would be too unnatural. And I would probably come off as creepy. They suggested that I go even more indirect, something like trying to sit kind of close to them, try to get some eye contact and get a conversation going that way.

Any thoughts?
 

MrWood

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never ever ever open with:
"you (girls) are really cute/beautiful"
every guy does this
"can you help me with some random lame Korean comment?"
every guy does this

stroll by, if they see you or one catches your eye... say "Hey girls" with a smile that says "I caught you lookin" as you keep strolling by
go to the bar, buy yourself a beer.
 

RangerMIke

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Talk to all of them, do not focus on any one particular girl. The key is DON"T ASK FOR PERMISSION TO ENTER THE GROUP.... just go in. The best way in my opinion is to just walk up and say "You look like a fun group... how did you get here?" How they respond will tell you all you need to know to get a conversation started. Did they come together... did they meet there.... who came with BFs... bottom line you are trying to build rapport, the only thing that you know at that moment is that you all had to get to that location somehow.... then build on that.

The one that wants you the most will make an effort to keep the conversation going... then focus on the one or ones that are showing interest.
 

fastlife

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My default if I can't think of anything is, "Oh, so you guys are over here talking sh1t about everybody. So stuck up." Most girls will invest in not seeming like the group of stuck up girls talking sh1t about everyone--they're put in a position where they either have to bring me into the group or seem like the total b1tches that all of the sudden they're worried is the vibe they're giving up. Then I just introduce myself to the one I like and tell her to introduce me to her friends and go from there.

But it doesn't really matter what you say. The key is to shift your mindset from a place of Please accept meeee. Let meeee be apart of your group to Let me see what you're about and I'll decide if this group is cool and I want them to be a part of my night. Open your eyes. Have you ever seen a group of girls that looked liked they were having fun? You know what I see--and I'm out a lot? Girls on their phones, not even talking to each other. Girls in bachelorette parties where the bride is drunk and her friends are tired and bored and want to go home but have to babysit their friend. Girls gossiping about the environment without ever engaging it. Girls trying to take the perfect selfie, and one of them always vetoing it. Even in mixed groups, the girls look bored as sh1t.

You're literally doing them the biggest favor by opening them and giving their night purpose.
 

nyc123

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never ever ever open with:
"you (girls) are really cute/beautiful"
every guy does this
"can you help me with some random lame Korean comment?"
every guy does this

stroll by, if they see you or one catches your eye... say "Hey girls" with a smile that says "I caught you lookin" as you keep strolling by
go to the bar, buy yourself a beer.
I think that very few guys would be bold enough to approach a group of girls at the park. If I approach at all, I think I'm already not like every other guy. But I could see myself being like every other guy that does approach.
I also think that your suggestion about what to do in the bar makes sense. I think I'd be willing to try that/experiment at a bar. Don't think it would work at a big park though. haha. it also depends on if they see me or not when I walk by.

Talk to all of them, do not focus on any one particular girl. The key is DON"T ASK FOR PERMISSION TO ENTER THE GROUP.... just go in. The best way in my opinion is to just walk up and say "You look like a fun group... how did you get here?" How they respond will tell you all you need to know to get a conversation started. Did they come together... did they meet there.... who came with BFs... bottom line you are trying to build rapport, the only thing that you know at that moment is that you all had to get to that location somehow.... then build on that.

The one that wants you the most will make an effort to keep the conversation going... then focus on the one or ones that are showing interest.
I like your suggestion. I've actually tried something like this a couple of times in the past in bars (only 2-sets though). I don't know why this didn't occur to me while I was at the park. I'll try this one for next time.

My default if I can't think of anything is, "Oh, so you guys are over here talking sh1t about everybody. So stuck up." Most girls will invest in not seeming like the group of stuck up girls talking sh1t about everyone--they're put in a position where they either have to bring me into the group or seem like the total b1tches that all of the sudden they're worried is the vibe they're giving up. Then I just introduce myself to the one I like and tell her to introduce me to her friends and go from there.

But it doesn't really matter what you say. The key is to shift your mindset from a place of Please accept meeee. Let meeee be apart of your group to Let me see what you're about and I'll decide if this group is cool and I want them to be a part of my night. Open your eyes. Have you ever seen a group of girls that looked liked they were having fun? You know what I see--and I'm out a lot? Girls on their phones, not even talking to each other. Girls in bachelorette parties where the bride is drunk and her friends are tired and bored and want to go home but have to babysit their friend. Girls gossiping about the environment without ever engaging it. Girls trying to take the perfect selfie, and one of them always vetoing it. Even in mixed groups, the girls look bored as sh1t.

You're literally doing them the biggest favor by opening them and giving their night purpose.
Sometimes I see groups of girls that are pretty involved in their own conversations. These groups I'm much more hesitant to approach. But you're right about a lot of times they're on their phones and not that actively talking to each other. Whenever I see this, I see it as a green light of sorts. I feel a lot more confident about this scenario.

Thanks everyone for the help!
 

Yewki

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ME:HI can I ask you Something
GIRLYL:hi Oh and you can ask me later
ME:eek:h you i guess you need to take bath now
GIRLY:*Smile* *NOD*
As you can see nothing special happened here
Was this translated from a different language? I don't even...
 
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