DJ tips not working for you? Here's why! (Proceed with caution)

[mynameisntNigel]

I haven't been on the forums here for four months. But I made an important realization that's too important not to share with you. This message is for guys of all ages, and I actually debated with myself whether or not to share on the Juan discussion or High school forum, because I've read posts by struggling guys there as well. But no matter: I chose High School because there's more of a need for it in this area.

I'm on the same struggle/walk as you are. Still single. Never had a first date. But! This is my year, and I learned a lesson (that didn't require painful experience, by the way) through observation that may make some of you never want to visit this site again.

Now, in the title for this thread, I wrote the end "Proceed with Caution." If YOU are having a GOOD STREAK with success in High school (or adulthood) and love Juanism and the DJ Bible, you will not like what I have to say and should leave this page immediately. You have been warned, but I can't control whether or not you'll ignore that, read this, and start ****ting salt at your computer because you ignored it.

On the other hand, if YOU are having PROBLEMS with girls, are following EVERY rule of the Juan Bible or Dr. Allen Thompson and are still getting no results, this might be the most pivotal article you read. Ever. Press Ctlr + S. Save this page now.

We've all had BAD experiences. Sometimes we term them our "AFC" days. I've described them to you on both here and on the Juan Discussion, but many of the old articles have since been deleted by the mods at my request because everyone harassed and made fun of me. Am I sad about that? Not really. I grew up being unwanted and bullied by everyone, so.... nothing new. Somewhere along the line I discovered this site and it seemed good. But of course, the tips and tricks didn't really work all the time.

By now, we (the group that should have stayed for this article and myself) understand the basic jist of attraction according to the internet. Don't slather with niceness, don't buy a bunch of gifts or act like a good friend. OK, so we implement that, and supposedly we should be getting at least month-long relationships with a girl and we, according to Juanism, girlschase, whatever sex-obsessed site you read on, sleep with her at least once by the time we're "done" with her. It...sounds great, right? But the fact is, it didn't work out like that. We implement the things, some of us are luck enough to get one or two dates, a kiss perhaps. But others? Nope. Instead, we get given a runaround, unnecessary mind-games, or even the same friend zone situation from before, in the worst cases, despite not conveying very much "Friend" behaviors to begin with. Eventually the girls end up hating us for....no good reason at all, really.

Pretty frustrating sit, huh?

This school year, I had a situation with the girl of my dreams that actually started out pretty well. We knew who we were, but until this year we didn't talk to one another extensively. For the sake of the people in the "Salt-****ting" group who did not heed my warning earlier, I'm not gonna explain the sit, but it went south, and then north, and then deep south, and then back up to somewhere lost in the middle, and she and I are both a little disgruntled sometimes with it.

Whenever I posted, the salt-****ters made assumptions that I was pedestaling and needy, mainly in 9th grade when I posted. And you know what? I overcame that roadblock. Even so when I asked about this sit, then people made the same judgments, and I actually had to post clarifying what was going on, and.... it sucks because I typed long chapters about my sits and then people misinterpret it, so I decided that I wasn't going to come here to get advice. Not anymore. I mean, if it's not working, then it's time to find another solution.

One day, entirely by accident, I discovered attractioninstitute.com. Generic name, I know, but this site was completely different from the juanist movement and the like. Its approach revealed something that the two guys, who had mastered seduction and getting girls the girlschase way, and they eventually learned that they were miserable because they couldn't have the kind of relationship that they wanted. So they wrote a free book, Seduction Community SUCKS. Go to the site, download the PDF, and keep reading this article (Your homework later is to read that book.) The basic message of the book is this:

Not everything in the Seduction Community works for everyone.

That's it. And that's the lesson that I had already observed from my observations. I haven't finished the book, but it so far agrees with the following observations.

I grew up in a Christian school with many of the same classmates. And I am a Christian. There were two guys in particular who were slightly more nerd-ish and childish than the rest of us. One of them loves baseball, and the other was a goody two-shoes who never talked to girls unless they needed classwork information from him.

These two guys were the first of my classmates to get into meaningful relationships. (I'm a junior.)

It's ironic AF, I know. One day, Baseball is sitting next to me in chapel before the service starts, texting his girlfriend, a college Freshman who gradded our school last May. I talked about how lucky he is, and they're always texting all day, mind you. He knew about my past struggles, and without hashing a bunch of "I-know-youu" stuff, he just says this: "Here's what chu gotta do: just be friends. I knew her for two years before she knew she liked me." On the inside, I laughed at how clueless he was. But later, as I thought about it, and as I discovered the Institute, I found that there are guys out there that are breaking every Internet rule and getting far better results than those who are keeping all 613-ish of the Juan commands.

So. That's the long and short of it, people. This is why you can't get a first date. Because you can't find your right Weapon of Choice. You've been using a longbow when your true calling is a steel katana. You have to find what works for you, pass it on to others, and if it doesn't work for them, then... direct them to this article. I'll come back later, as there are bigger things than This that I have to worry about at present.

Do your homework. Read SDS. After that, you can decide on whether or not Juanism is worth it.

 

[NorwegianDJ]

Just be yourself bro

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Just be yourself bro

If it's yourself it better be a better version of yourself that allows you to obtain your objectives. It cannot be an immature or inexperienced self. We all are growing all the time.

 

[DocFaustus]

I haven't been on the forums here for four months. But I made an important realization that's too important not to share with you. This message is for guys of all ages, and I actually debated with myself whether or not to share on the Juan discussion or High school forum, because I've read posts by struggling guys there as well. But no matter: I chose High School because there's more of a need for it in this area.

I'm on the same struggle/walk as you are. Still single. Never had a first date. But! This is my year, and I learned a lesson (that didn't require painful experience, by the way) through observation that may make some of you never want to visit this site again.

Now, in the title for this thread, I wrote the end "Proceed with Caution." If YOU are having a GOOD STREAK with success in High school (or adulthood) and love Juanism and the DJ Bible, you will not like what I have to say and should leave this page immediately. You have been warned, but I can't control whether or not you'll ignore that, read this, and start ****ting salt at your computer because you ignored it.

On the other hand, if YOU are having PROBLEMS with girls, are following EVERY rule of the Juan Bible or Dr. Allen Thompson and are still getting no results, this might be the most pivotal article you read. Ever. Press Ctlr + S. Save this page now.

We've all had BAD experiences. Sometimes we term them our "AFC" days. I've described them to you on both here and on the Juan Discussion, but many of the old articles have since been deleted by the mods at my request because everyone harassed and made fun of me. Am I sad about that? Not really. I grew up being unwanted and bullied by everyone, so.... nothing new. Somewhere along the line I discovered this site and it seemed good. But of course, the tips and tricks didn't really work all the time.

By now, we (the group that should have stayed for this article and myself) understand the basic jist of attraction according to the internet. Don't slather with niceness, don't buy a bunch of gifts or act like a good friend. OK, so we implement that, and supposedly we should be getting at least month-long relationships with a girl and we, according to Juanism, girlschase, whatever sex-obsessed site you read on, sleep with her at least once by the time we're "done" with her. It...sounds great, right? But the fact is, it didn't work out like that. We implement the things, some of us are luck enough to get one or two dates, a kiss perhaps. But others? Nope. Instead, we get given a runaround, unnecessary mind-games, or even the same friend zone situation from before, in the worst cases, despite not conveying very much "Friend" behaviors to begin with. Eventually the girls end up hating us for....no good reason at all, really.

Pretty frustrating sit, huh?

This school year, I had a situation with the girl of my dreams that actually started out pretty well. We knew who we were, but until this year we didn't talk to one another extensively. For the sake of the people in the "Salt-****ting" group who did not heed my warning earlier, I'm not gonna explain the sit, but it went south, and then north, and then deep south, and then back up to somewhere lost in the middle, and she and I are both a little disgruntled sometimes with it.

Whenever I posted, the salt-****ters made assumptions that I was pedestaling and needy, mainly in 9th grade when I posted. And you know what? I overcame that roadblock. Even so when I asked about this sit, then people made the same judgments, and I actually had to post clarifying what was going on, and.... it sucks because I typed long chapters about my sits and then people misinterpret it, so I decided that I wasn't going to come here to get advice. Not anymore. I mean, if it's not working, then it's time to find another solution.

One day, entirely by accident, I discovered attractioninstitute.com. Generic name, I know, but this site was completely different from the juanist movement and the like. Its approach revealed something that the two guys, who had mastered seduction and getting girls the girlschase way, and they eventually learned that they were miserable because they couldn't have the kind of relationship that they wanted. So they wrote a free book, Seduction Community SUCKS. Go to the site, download the PDF, and keep reading this article (Your homework later is to read that book.) The basic message of the book is this:

Not everything in the Seduction Community works for everyone.

That's it. And that's the lesson that I had already observed from my observations. I haven't finished the book, but it so far agrees with the following observations.

I grew up in a Christian school with many of the same classmates. And I am a Christian. There were two guys in particular who were slightly more nerd-ish and childish than the rest of us. One of them loves baseball, and the other was a goody two-shoes who never talked to girls unless they needed classwork information from him.

These two guys were the first of my classmates to get into meaningful relationships. (I'm a junior.)

It's ironic AF, I know. One day, Baseball is sitting next to me in chapel before the service starts, texting his girlfriend, a college Freshman who gradded our school last May. I talked about how lucky he is, and they're always texting all day, mind you. He knew about my past struggles, and without hashing a bunch of "I-know-youu" stuff, he just says this: "Here's what chu gotta do: just be friends. I knew her for two years before she knew she liked me." On the inside, I laughed at how clueless he was. But later, as I thought about it, and as I discovered the Institute, I found that there are guys out there that are breaking every Internet rule and getting far better results than those who are keeping all 613-ish of the Juan commands.

So. That's the long and short of it, people. This is why you can't get a first date. Because you can't find your right Weapon of Choice. You've been using a longbow when your true calling is a steel katana. You have to find what works for you, pass it on to others, and if it doesn't work for them, then... direct them to this article. I'll come back later, as there are bigger things than This that I have to worry about at present.

Do your homework. Read SDS. After that, you can decide on whether or not Juanism is worth it.

I read your post and sincerely I can't avoid disagreeing. I'm not a SS fan all the time, I find that some people here are too obsessed with the wrong stuff, but the base of it, the sense you get from the Book of Pook per example is pure gold. The truth is, you are miserable because you make your happiness depend on how many girls you get, how much time your relationship lasts, etc.. thats why. You seem to dislike the fact that SS kinda ****s on the slow process of being with a girl and trying your best with her, that's right, no oneitis.. because that's the main problem with people that come here they tend to be obsessed with x or y, and when they finally break free of x or y, they don't learn from that experience and jump into another awful experience. Does it always end with you getting **** ? Maybe not always, but do you really want to waste time, over and over again finding that girls, just being friends with her and then after 3 long months (best case scenario my friend) discover that she just got a new boyfriend? Do you?

I hate when people here come with PUA stuff, I hate that I idea I need to impress someone, that's what being a DJ is to me, someone who is AWESOME, the world might hate him, he might have so many haters he can't cross a room without being insulted behind his back, but the point is he doesn't give a flying fck. Why? Because he likes himself, he knows his mission, his dreams, his past, his mistakes, his successes, he knows himself and loves it, because he improves himself everyday, goes throught struggles, not to impress x or z, not to get *****, not to get love from his daddy, because he bloody likes being who he is, because he bloody likes doing what he does.

This might seem a bit off topic to you, if it does, then I'm afraid that either I am lost in this community or you didn't struggle enough with it (or maybe both even). The thing is, SS focus a lot on get women, because that is indeed a part of life, a very important one. But this isn't supposed to be life, a DJ can be freaking happy without a woman after him, a DJ might be married for years, might not have sex for years, might have hundreds of girls and never settle, he does what he pleases, he does what feels right to him. But wait, shouldn't that mean that you can "just be friends" and then "attack" ? NO! Because you are losing the point, you look at that girl and you don't see a friend, you see a sexual partner, a desire, that's not better or worse, it's normal, but you cannot avoid it, label it as a friendship and then suddenly try to change it, or your life will be miserable, go after what you want! You want a girlfriend, go for it, have in her the bestfriend in the world, but first she needs to be your girlfriend.


(continues)

 

[DocFaustus]

I haven't been on the forums here for four months. But I made an important realization that's too important not to share with you. This message is for guys of all ages, and I actually debated with myself whether or not to share on the Juan discussion or High school forum, because I've read posts by struggling guys there as well. But no matter: I chose High School because there's more of a need for it in this area.

I'm on the same struggle/walk as you are. Still single. Never had a first date. But! This is my year, and I learned a lesson (that didn't require painful experience, by the way) through observation that may make some of you never want to visit this site again.

Now, in the title for this thread, I wrote the end "Proceed with Caution." If YOU are having a GOOD STREAK with success in High school (or adulthood) and love Juanism and the DJ Bible, you will not like what I have to say and should leave this page immediately. You have been warned, but I can't control whether or not you'll ignore that, read this, and start ****ting salt at your computer because you ignored it.

On the other hand, if YOU are having PROBLEMS with girls, are following EVERY rule of the Juan Bible or Dr. Allen Thompson and are still getting no results, this might be the most pivotal article you read. Ever. Press Ctlr + S. Save this page now.

We've all had BAD experiences. Sometimes we term them our "AFC" days. I've described them to you on both here and on the Juan Discussion, but many of the old articles have since been deleted by the mods at my request because everyone harassed and made fun of me. Am I sad about that? Not really. I grew up being unwanted and bullied by everyone, so.... nothing new. Somewhere along the line I discovered this site and it seemed good. But of course, the tips and tricks didn't really work all the time.

By now, we (the group that should have stayed for this article and myself) understand the basic jist of attraction according to the internet. Don't slather with niceness, don't buy a bunch of gifts or act like a good friend. OK, so we implement that, and supposedly we should be getting at least month-long relationships with a girl and we, according to Juanism, girlschase, whatever sex-obsessed site you read on, sleep with her at least once by the time we're "done" with her. It...sounds great, right? But the fact is, it didn't work out like that. We implement the things, some of us are luck enough to get one or two dates, a kiss perhaps. But others? Nope. Instead, we get given a runaround, unnecessary mind-games, or even the same friend zone situation from before, in the worst cases, despite not conveying very much "Friend" behaviors to begin with. Eventually the girls end up hating us for....no good reason at all, really.

Pretty frustrating sit, huh?

This school year, I had a situation with the girl of my dreams that actually started out pretty well. We knew who we were, but until this year we didn't talk to one another extensively. For the sake of the people in the "Salt-****ting" group who did not heed my warning earlier, I'm not gonna explain the sit, but it went south, and then north, and then deep south, and then back up to somewhere lost in the middle, and she and I are both a little disgruntled sometimes with it.

Whenever I posted, the salt-****ters made assumptions that I was pedestaling and needy, mainly in 9th grade when I posted. And you know what? I overcame that roadblock. Even so when I asked about this sit, then people made the same judgments, and I actually had to post clarifying what was going on, and.... it sucks because I typed long chapters about my sits and then people misinterpret it, so I decided that I wasn't going to come here to get advice. Not anymore. I mean, if it's not working, then it's time to find another solution.

One day, entirely by accident, I discovered attractioninstitute.com. Generic name, I know, but this site was completely different from the juanist movement and the like. Its approach revealed something that the two guys, who had mastered seduction and getting girls the girlschase way, and they eventually learned that they were miserable because they couldn't have the kind of relationship that they wanted. So they wrote a free book, Seduction Community SUCKS. Go to the site, download the PDF, and keep reading this article (Your homework later is to read that book.) The basic message of the book is this:

Not everything in the Seduction Community works for everyone.

That's it. And that's the lesson that I had already observed from my observations. I haven't finished the book, but it so far agrees with the following observations.

I grew up in a Christian school with many of the same classmates. And I am a Christian. There were two guys in particular who were slightly more nerd-ish and childish than the rest of us. One of them loves baseball, and the other was a goody two-shoes who never talked to girls unless they needed classwork information from him.

These two guys were the first of my classmates to get into meaningful relationships. (I'm a junior.)

It's ironic AF, I know. One day, Baseball is sitting next to me in chapel before the service starts, texting his girlfriend, a college Freshman who gradded our school last May. I talked about how lucky he is, and they're always texting all day, mind you. He knew about my past struggles, and without hashing a bunch of "I-know-youu" stuff, he just says this: "Here's what chu gotta do: just be friends. I knew her for two years before she knew she liked me." On the inside, I laughed at how clueless he was. But later, as I thought about it, and as I discovered the Institute, I found that there are guys out there that are breaking every Internet rule and getting far better results than those who are keeping all 613-ish of the Juan commands.

So. That's the long and short of it, people. This is why you can't get a first date. Because you can't find your right Weapon of Choice. You've been using a longbow when your true calling is a steel katana. You have to find what works for you, pass it on to others, and if it doesn't work for them, then... direct them to this article. I'll come back later, as there are bigger things than This that I have to worry about at present.

Do your homework. Read SDS. After that, you can decide on whether or not Juanism is worth it.

I have had many bad experiences, lost myself many times. I came here originally 3 years ago, I decided I'd had enough with being the emotional ***** I was. Did I do it? Not yet, but I'm light years away from the AFC I was. I can say since I first read a post on SS I got my biggest oneitis ever and a possible severe depression because of it, I was the biggest AFC ever, but one day I decided I'd enough with feeling miserable and went back again to reading, I understood I was still focusing my life about girls in general, I had nothing going on, no passion (I had a life yes, but no driving force), it takes some thought not just action. I got better, and this year and another oneitis, smaller, shorter, that made me grow even more I believe. I've lost my virginity, I made out with several girls and could've had many more, and I grew. I understand now that sometimes I want casual stuff, but generally I want something true with someone I actually have some kind of connection but don't care if lasts a night or five decades, that's what I'm looking for in that area of my life, I may sometimes have something else more casual because I don't mind. That's it, simple no big deal. Just a small fraction of my life, I now can say that I have big dreams, I am a busy person and I even have troubles when meeting girls because I don't wanna waste time that could be spent in a more important sector of my life right now. I'm growing out of my main problem.

That's what SS is about, growing a life, not just about to get girls. But overall it won't be here that you find the answers, here you find other people like you, in that same road, maybe far ahead or a little behind, you'll find great posts (ex Pook) and some worse ones. But it's by facing pain, by facing the disasters, by facing rejection that you'll grow, there's no avoiding it, you gotta have those moments when you must make the choice and effort of getting back up. I hope you don't take the easy road.

Cheers m8 !

 

[NorwegianDJ]

But wait, shouldn't that mean that you can "just be friends" and then "attack" ? NO! Because you are losing the point, you look at that girl and you don't see a friend, you see a sexual partner, a desire, that's not better or worse, it's normal, but you cannot avoid it, label it as a friendship and then suddenly try to change it, or your life will be miserable, go after what you want! You want a girlfriend, go for it, have in her the bestfriend in the world, but first she needs to be your girlfriend.


(continues)

Friendships can develop into relationships, moreover friendships with sexual undertones aren't against the law. You're adressing it with the assumption that it equals the person not following their intent.

 

[DocFaustus]

Friendships can develop into relationships, moreover friendships with sexual undertones aren't against the law. You're adressing it with the assumption that it equals the person not following their intent.

I'm saying if he's interested in someone that he shouldn't go looking for a friendship because it usually ends up badly and with people coming to communities like this or worse ones because they feel miserable. A cup of wine might not be the problem but if you back it with past alcoholic behaviour it might change the picture. Things like that happen, but naturally not forcefully.

 

[Huffman]

Friendships can develop into relationships, moreover friendships with sexual undertones aren't against the law. You're adressing it with the assumption that it equals the person not following their intent.

Yes yes, they can, lots of things can happen theoretically!

If those guys can pull off a "friendship with sexual undertones" where the guy holds real power - then by all means they don't need our counseling! But truth is they can not! Which is why they are here.

So let's not spread advice that is easily misunderstood.

 

[mynameisntNigel]

If it's yourself it better be a better version of yourself that allows you to obtain your objectives. It cannot be an immature or inexperienced self. We all are growing all the time.

That's true. In principle, I am a good person. And DocFaustus, I've never really been needy. I've always been an independent person and was pretty reserved as a kid. It's just that I have to find the right way to present that experienced Self.

I used to think (for a short time) that I wanted a girlfriend just to have a girlfriend. That's so not my viewpoint today. It's because I want that girl that I want her. And I mean long-term to settle down with.

That's one problem with SoSuave: Don Juanism objectifies women. It instructs everyone here to pretend that they don't matter, to pretend we have no feelings of our own whatsoever, and basically tells us that women are only good for sex. Not all Juanists on this site do, but the hardcore ones do. I don't remember the username but a while ago one guy said "**** a hot girl? go **** hotter!"

Is that really how complicated it should be? Do we really need to play a bunch of mind games and push-and-pull power games with women to get success?

The Juan Bible talks about many things, and the main site does, that you should do this or that, and then I found girlschase.com. THAT site made things even MORE complicated, introducing such alien terms as "The Boyfriend Dilemma" (a girl acts weird when she wants you as her boyfriend, which could end the situation badly) or "Auto-Rejection" (which I found to be when your "attainability" is too high/low) And you know what? That site objectifies women even more than Sosuave.net does! And guess what, I'm gonna say it again: no guarantee that either will work for you.

 

[mynameisntNigel]

Yes yes, they can, lots of things can happen theoretically!

If those guys can pull off a "friendship with sexual undertones" where the guy holds real power - then by all means they don't need our counseling! But truth is they can not! Which is why they are here.

So let's not spread advice that is easily misunderstood.

You're right. Friends become lovers all the damn time, but it's just the poison of seduction extremists saying that it "never" happens on its own. And that's another thing that really burns me up

 

[mrgoodstuff]

That's true. In principle, I am a good person. And DocFaustus, I've never really been needy. I've always been an independent person and was pretty reserved as a kid. It's just that I have to find the right way to present that experienced Self.

I used to think (for a short time) that I wanted a girlfriend just to have a girlfriend. That's so not my viewpoint today. It's because I want that girl that I want her. And I mean long-term to settle down with.

If that's what your objective is, this is your life, your goals, and it's a fine goal. If this is your goal your selection criteria will be different from a guy designing a plate system as sosuave endorses.

That's one problem with SoSuave: Don Juanism objectifies women. It instructs everyone here to pretend that they don't matter, to pretend we have no feelings of our own whatsoever, and basically tells us that women are only good for sex. Not all Juanists on this site do, but the hardcore ones do. I don't remember the username but a while ago one guy said "**** a hot girl? go **** hotter!"

Is that really how complicated it should be? Do we really need to play a bunch of mind games and push-and-pull power games with women to get success?

Objectification was necessary due to feminism. The women had objectified men for the most part and the only way to balance it out was to objectify women. Some of the games ARE required to keep a woman interested and her emotions fluctuating. Even a "good" woman will benefit from some light game, even if she probably will never leave or cheat. It's necessary. Attraction is not by choice, but if you are making yourself attractive or more attractive, being attractive is NOT AN ACCIDENT. Even on the so touted "hot girls", everything in their look and mannerism was put in that manner to catch your attention.

And if you want a "good girl", your not going to be looking for "hot girls" that want to maximize their dates, and their game is the exact reverse of DJ game, they get dates and give out puzzy to pretty much get favour from us and to get our money. And a babe will maximize giving as LITTLE to nothing as possible to achieve her objectives.

The Juan Bible talks about many things, and the main site does, that you should do this or that, and then I found girlschase.com. THAT site made things even MORE complicated, introducing such alien terms as "The Boyfriend Dilemma" (a girl acts weird when she wants you as her boyfriend, which could end the situation badly) or "Auto-Rejection" (which I found to be when your "attainability" is too high/low) And you know what? That site objectifies women even more than Sosuave.net does! And guess what, I'm gonna say it again: no guarantee that either will work for you.

All of these rules when you understand them will become part of your person, so that they will become reflexive, you won't be thinking about it or overanalyzing things.

Like I said before, due to our current political environment with feminization and effiminization of the male, many of these things are NECESSARY to do even if you have a "good" woman. Also being attractive is not an ACCIDENT, it's intentional.

 

[mynameisntNigel]

Hey guys. It's been awhile and I haven't looked at this site, but mrgoodstuff, you have a good point. The problem with "all these rules..." is that the websites give empty things like "send an emotional text" or "make her invest in the relationship," etc but they give vague to no examples on how to do so.

There is one PDF - ONE PDF - that I was able to find for free online, and after I read it, I was like "That...might work." That is Friends into Lovers by Eric Edgemont ( (C)2006-2012) and I got it from docslide.us. No guarantee it's still there, but I suggest you go look at that, too. It has some tips and tricks that could prove useful in your lives, but in the end of the book, I just found something that I will finish this post off with.
Basically it starts out kind of eerily, but in the end it's about changing your life, grooming style, getting new women, and then having a meetup with the Girl of Your Dreams in the future, after your life is improved, talking about things you've been doing, and making her curious and aroused. I'm warning you, though: he starts the book telling his own high school story and then starts on a tangent that's similar to other articles and he says things like "you are infatuated with her," "...how niceness kills attraction..." "...whoever cares the least controls the relationship." If you're dealing with a big problem right now, it will hurt to read his intro to that book. When I read the main part of his book, it said that you have to self-assure yourself with several lines to make yourself more attractive in front of the mirror before you go out, and it says to meet new women. But other than "my friend introduced me to..." I can't remember any real tips or ways to get from Hard to Get to Coming Around.

Furthermore, in the "success stories" in the back of the book, the guy had already slept with so many girls, that by the time he got the Girl of His Dreams, it was surface sex and he stayed friends with her.

See this is what I'm saying. Juanism (again, I'm saying mainline Juanist beliefs around this site) revolves around sleeping with every girl and having tons of girls in your life. But the reality is: while it seems fun for a while, it ruins sex and your relationships. You're getting into relationships that, by your own admission, mean nothing to you, you don't care about the girl except for her body and the high you get from it, and you've got several other relationships like it in case that girl disappears.

You're using sheer numbers of these relationships in the place of the one (or slightly more) relationship that you really wanted at the outset. On the adult forum a while ago, one guy was complaining that a girl would alternate from in his bed to far, far away, and he asked what to do about it. it seemed to be his only relationship, and some guys were chastising him for having "oneitis." There is no such thing as Oneitis. One is not an -itis. Gonna make that clear right now. But! There were other guys who replied to him with a more "you-made-your-bed-and-lie-in-it" attitude. Meaning: That's what you signed up for when you undertook Juanism.