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Done this twice now and both cases were really bad moves - BUT that being said, I have known people who did it and had amazing life changes because of it and its been great. I think it is really a case of you never know which turn life will take, but you can make many different opportunities...

Hi Guys, please give me any constructive views and advice if there's a way to salvage this one. I apologise if this email is long, but if you bear with me and choose to read it/ offer your advice I will be appreciative. You'll also feel good about helping a dude thats asking for knowledge ...

MT I am sure you already have but you simply MUST ready Shari Shreibers site as many have posted here. She has an actual article on getting over these toxic relationships. Let me repeat, you must read her articles. It will really help you. As for this part: This girl, though, opened up...

MT I actually think the letter is a good thing to write - but here's my caveat - NOT A GOOD THING TO SEND, as others have suggested. Clearly you are hurting. Sometimes writing a letter makes you feel better because it crystallises things and provides a way to express your anger which am...

These are good! Wish I had something witty to add!

And that girl wins my award for being the most talentless person on the net. I mean even the video editing skills are as nauseating as her terrible accents. Any way, not trying to hijack someone elses thread.

Ok thanks guys thevilittletroll - help me more with the kino angle. You mean, we joke a bit, I casually start a bit of arm touching etc? Any specific tricks or scenario's?

Hi Guys Kind of friendzoned myself with this chick and seek any advice on possible ways to get out. My disclaimer before I get cyber bashed: Am still spinning other plates, this is not one-it-is before I get accused, but rather just a very high quality chick which i want to try and salvage...

Well there you go and this is absolutely legitimate, I am in not making this up at all- my ex was the president of her local area's cat owners club!!!! Her life revolved around those two little kittys. This sh&t just scares me.

Yes 49au - I know you are right. In fact trying to educate myself about this is my only defence mechanism that I know of to prevent me stupidly trying to get her back. I know if I don't learn about the reality of her condition, I will fall for her again in seconds! Whenever I think about her I...

But is it always the case that all guys who fall for a BPD have issues as well? I feel this point is perhaps always overplayed and overanalysed. I accept sometimes this is the case but wonder why every time a guy falls for a BPD they are told to look into their own issues and problems. I do...

In terms of my questions above about how BPD's behave towards their ex's, yes AlexDP and 49AU this makes sense to me. Of course my ex's previous boyfriend, the one she was living with for seven years before she hit or me at a friends birthday drinks one night and then dumped him for me - (yes...

This stuff can make the toughest guy on earth weep like a little bi4ch. Its just horrifying.

I would like to understand more about this if I could. It's an interesting point and I would like to know to know if they do get over their boyfriends (the many) and what happens if they see one of those again. Alex DP, your wisdom along with others on this thread is something I am very...

Yes forty is right - texts and emails suffer that they sound blunt, sometimes grumpy, and very literal. Vocal tone and inflection are everything - its how sarcasm works, people say something extreme but do it with light tone in their voice, and if its face to face commuination they say it often...

I guess the only thing I would counter to my above is that BPD is not a mental illness in the sense that people suffering real and legitimate mental illness (eg schizophrenia, bipolar,) are unable to fix their problem with therapy- its a chemical thing in their brain which is medically very...

But from what I was reading, the problem is that most of them never believe they have a problem, the are good at convincing themselves its always someone elses fault and they are the victim. Therapy is only good where someone knows and accepts they have a problem. Alcoholics for instance know...

Yep bang on! One of the things I try and do is accept that you will never understand or rationalise their behaviour. They can't even rationalise it themselves. I think the problem is that as intelligent logical guys, we often try to make sense of their behaviour or try to understand it so...

I must say "really poor form" sounds too aggresive to me as well and sounds like you are sulking, but I will acknowledge I have little answer as to how you would respond to that text either and am keen to hear what others suggest. I would probably have not answered it at all, because I think...

I am sure you guys are right in what your saying, but then just offer me a little more help in overcoming this one. Say I start chatting to some girl who seems pretty serious, we decide we have something in common and we chat about (insert whatever nerdy profound and unfunny topic here). How do...