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  1. resilient

    2nd time gf needs space

    Exactly. If the new guy is acing attraction and frame, she'll keep chasing his validation or push for exclusivity. Once he gets comfy, complacent, loses value, gets out of shape or seizes satisfying her emotional and physical needs, she'll return to the hunt. If she's active with OLD & social...
  2. resilient

    Was She Just Broken or Did She Have BPD? (Breakup Story)

    Never fear a hoover. She's just a woman. Working on IDGAF attitude, detach from the outcome... you won't feel "triggered" when she hits you up. All of that is easier if you're out there exercising your plate options and pursuing your mission and purpose in life beyond women.
  3. resilient

    2nd time gf needs space

    So much this. Flirting drop off and infrequent texting times, excuses, difficult scheduling dates, flaking are other reasons (I.e. a guy with higher perceived LMS hit her up for the same night you two were supposed to hang). I experienced this big time with my last ex-main plate this fall when...
  4. resilient

    2nd time gf needs space

    Suffice to say if she does shape up, need less space, what is to say that she won’t push you away again when she goes through another rollercoaster in life? Partners should be accountable and dependable to help each other grow. You mentioned the part about molestation so that tells me she will...
  5. resilient

    what next eh!?

    Separation and divorce is tough. Especially after the years investing into a person and the future you two were both building. What helped me get through that phase was finding myself again. I came back here, talked to a few old members, and discussed how I was going to put my life back...
  6. resilient

    online dating/tinder/bumble/etc...

    IMHO, landing dates with these dating apps/sites isn’t impossible. It’s getting second dates and LTRs from them is a bit more difficult. New options flooding into their inbox on the regular. Value must be continuisly be conveyed as having higher value than your competition for her to maintain...
  7. resilient

    Time does not heal wounds with women; only replacement does

    Chances go up faster if she's a heavy social media/OLD user. That's why I'm getting increasingly convinced that the next LTR I enter in next year and beyond will most likely result from my social spheres from Meetup, church, school, parties, or friend of a friend arrangement. Social ties have...
  8. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    Work in progress, Guru, work in progress. All my options shored up. I wasn't landing date2s with OLD women while with the main plate during the months we dated. The frame strengthens when I know I have options. Education/career is running smooth on all cyclinders and gym progress continues to...
  9. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    Dang man. That's ice cold lol. Hilarious, reminds me of my ex-wife who had a few chat and gaming apps I was aware of that she was constantly messaging other guys. I didn't care as much that she vented there from time to time. My issue became when those sources became a primary source to talk...
  10. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    @Music_czar, another indicator at how dialed in she is to her other orbiters (via OLD/social media/IRL dudes) is watch while you're out on dates and her behavior with her phone and smart watch. If either or both are in the line of sight steal a glance when a notification(s) pop up. I had a...
  11. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    To add to the discussion @oldmanofthesea, creating space used to increase mystery, separation anxiety, and desire. To close the gap, the plate would reach out and restore contact. That worked for me in the past, lately in the last few years though, I've seen these plates just use my absent...
  12. resilient

    Hibernation

    Slaying it my dudes. I’m making progress with the gym gains, career change, grad school applied (looking very promising for a January start as a result of the switch). I gave up waiting for unstable offers from schools out of state that wouldn’t let me start until next fall. Time waits for no...
  13. resilient

    The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

    Kudos @BeTheChange for your introspection and self-healing. You’re a better man for it. Your next relationship will reap the rewards that you put into forgiving what happened and the how you approach romantic and non-romantic relationships. You have been productive with your time. Keep it up...
  14. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    There’s the rub, my friend.
  15. resilient

    Gratitude & Game

    Refreshing thread. To be brief... don’t give up yourself. Recognize and value the hard work you’re putting in your DJ life daily. Position yourself to where you’re open and readily embrace change. Ready for anything. Detach from the outcome as best as one can. Affirm yourself daily that you’re...
  16. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    It’s hard for me to grasp that a man who has a healthy exercise regime, diet, solid career, hobbies, and social spheres can be that boring to a woman over time that she begins to look elsewhere for attention and new dating interests. I thought many want to eventually settle down, start a family...
  17. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    @mrgoodstuff: Post-wall levels the game yet as someone else said, they increasingly lose the ability to pair bond. They will settle for anyone offering the ring. The risk is her getting bored or unhappy. A strong family upbringing, emotional support from level-minded peers, finding fulfilling...
  18. resilient

    Getting tired of dealing with women

    I get that man. I’m stoked on my hobbies, education, career, friends/family (for the most part). I refresh new plates often as they typically expire around four~six weeks. The following two weeks are usually met with distancing, withdrawing, hot/cold, infrequent texting, less physical...
  19. resilient

    Been seeing a girl for a few months but no actual sex

    Been there... it sucks. She’s stringing you along. Definitely begin paying more attention to the plates that can satisfy your fwb needs. She has emotional and physical intimacy issues as a result of her divorce. Sincerely interested women makes things easy for you... not make you jump through...
  20. resilient

    Ghosting will it work

    I wouldn’t beat around the bush with ghosting and playing games. If you’re that interested then ask her out on a date before or when she texts you. She says no then you have your answer to move on. The longer you stay in “ghost” status, the longer you will remain dwelling on her which isn’t...
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