The Frame Paradox?

[CMNILS87]

I have a question about frame and it comes from both sides of the spectrum.

Case #1 Parents have been married for over 33 years. Father has a strong frame over all of us maybe?... Calls all of us on bull****, pulls the old silent treatment and walk away all the time. Loving relationship i would think with my mother. She seems subordinate to him in most ways. But lately, with house remodeling and such, mom decided to go over the budget by 30-35k and my dad is like hmm, "she gets whatever she wants i suppose". He's CEO of engineering at a big firm, smart as hell, **** of the walk, but when it comes to mom, its like she can have whatever she wants. The unconditional love of a guy side of the coin i guess. So i see this moreso as him being a provider instead of a lover now?

Case#2: I'm a male Nurse and i work with a bunch of other nurses. Now this one nurse has a boyfriend convict. They've been together for 7-8 years. Out of that hes been in jail for 5 of them for drug possession charges and intent to sell. There's something about his frame or his inherent ability to manipulate her into getting him stuff while hes in prison. The ***** has a lot going for her, but shes hung up on a loser that pretty much controls her ass. She sends him money every paycheck and she just sent him a pair of 350 dollar shoes. If he were to AFC out i'm guessing she'd book it, but his manipulation game is so strong shes sending him i love you letters for valentines day? She showed me that he called her 15 times in one day to talk, yet she like, "hes my man". I get the whole him giving her his time, but 15 calls in one day is bonkers. Can anybody explain that ****? He offers nothing, but gets everything from her.

Side note (nurses are some of the horniest and nastiest chicks around). I cant begin to count the amount of sexual **** we bust each others chops on at work, it actually make the day go by faster. Bull****ting with girls all day makes dates much easier.

Ive read up on Frame and such, but in these two instances, can anybody with experience give more insight? Just something thats been stirring in my head since finding this sight and taking the red pill.

 

[samspade]

For Case #1 I think you're on the right track. He provides for her. His frame is probably strong enough to make allowances financially. Hopefully he has a mental line drawn for what he'll permit. Keep in mind even the strongest men can be manipulated a little. But if day to day he seems to have strong frame, he probably does. The money thing might be his little way of being generous to her...and let's face it, a good subordinate woman deserves a little generosity.

For #2 - That sounds more like co-dependency to me. Yes, women fall for jailbirds, so that's nothing new. But him calling her fifteen times in one day? Her buying $350 shoes? That to me doesn't sound sensible if your goal is to help him get out of jail. Someone can have good "frame" in some ways but still be behaviorally immature or messed up. My theory is people like these two will find each other eventually.

 

[AllDay85]

I have a question about frame and it comes from both sides of the spectrum.

Case #1 Parents have been married for over 33 years. Father has a strong frame over all of us maybe?... Calls all of us on bull****, pulls the old silent treatment and walk away all the time. Loving relationship i would think with my mother. She seems subordinate to him in most ways. But lately, with house remodeling and such, mom decided to go over the budget by 30-35k and my dad is like hmm, "she gets whatever she wants i suppose". He's CEO of engineering at a big firm, smart as hell, **** of the walk, but when it comes to mom, its like she can have whatever she wants. The unconditional love of a guy side of the coin i guess. So i see this moreso as him being a provider instead of a lover now?

Case#2: I'm a male Nurse and i work with a bunch of other nurses. Now this one nurse has a boyfriend convict. They've been together for 7-8 years. Out of that hes been in jail for 5 of them for drug possession charges and intent to sell. There's something about his frame or his inherent ability to manipulate her into getting him stuff while hes in prison. The ***** has a lot going for her, but shes hung up on a loser that pretty much controls her ass. She sends him money every paycheck and she just sent him a pair of 350 dollar shoes. If he were to AFC out i'm guessing she'd book it, but his manipulation game is so strong shes sending him i love you letters for valentines day? She showed me that he called her 15 times in one day to talk, yet she like, "hes my man". I get the whole him giving her his time, but 15 calls in one day is bonkers. Can anybody explain that ****? He offers nothing, but gets everything from her.

Side note (nurses are some of the horniest and nastiest chicks around). I cant begin to count the amount of sexual **** we bust each others chops on at work, it actually make the day go by faster. Bull****ting with girls all day makes dates much easier.

Ive read up on Frame and such, but in these two instances, can anybody with experience give more insight? Just something thats been stirring in my head since finding this sight and taking the red pill.

As an ex-con I can personally speak on this. Women were always willing to send me money, letters, and come visit. You're fulfilling a different kind of need in them. They idealize your relationship. I can almost guarantee that nurse is banging other dudes occasionally too though.

This also plays into the whole "absence makes the mind grow fonder" aspect of things. Without him being there, she invents all kinds of fantasies and false thoughts of him. This stuff is real!!