'Dating apps have become the kiss of death for male reproductive success' says a new book

Gamisch

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Looks matter more than personality.
Normies wanna coast on their personality. That only takes you so far. As a DJ it's best to develop both your personality and your looks. Both can be improved drastically when a man puts in the work!
Most men are physically unappealing....ain't that the truth.

I live in Central Jersey and I can't tell you how many times I see guys in their 30s and 40s who are 20 to 50 lbs overweight, going bald and dress like GD bums (jogging pants, hoodies, etc)

I guess these guys don't want any attention from hot women?
Which is amazing. Between 30 and 40 is the perfect time to start building your body. Imo a grown man can't keep getting away with the" skinny-stoner-model-look".

And ofcourse much worse: watching uour own metabolism fail on you while you blow up like a balloon.
 

Hamurabimbi

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Most men are physically unappealing....ain't that the truth.

I live in Central Jersey and I can't tell you how many times I see guys in their 30s and 40s who are 20 to 50 lbs overweight, going bald and dress like GD bums (jogging pants, hoodies, etc)

I guess these guys don't want any attention from hot women?
Probably blue-pilled and married. Like I was.
 

Hamurabimbi

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Normies wanna coast on their personality. That only takes you so far. As a DJ it's best to develop both your personality and your looks. Both can be improved drastically when a man puts in the work!
What makes ‘normies’ think their ‘personality’ is any better than Chad’s personality? Literally every Chad I’ve ever met has been super chill.
 

Gamisch

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What makes ‘normies’ think their ‘personality’ is any better than Chad’s personality? Literally every Chad I’ve ever met has been super chill.
The same mentality that makes people say that rich people don't work hard. It's PURE and uncut CAP. It's basically all a normie has over a Chad(in his own mind) ,like the hb5 will say that the hb9 is a bytch without knowing her. Hb9 is just chilling and doing her thang..

If anything a Chad indeed is chill AF because he has 99 problems..but a ***** ain't one.

I do have to say that the badboy version of Chad (often Tyrone 's profile) might have some anger in him due to upbringing.. (and lack off)...
 

MatureDJ

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What makes ‘normies’ think their ‘personality’ is any better than Chad’s personality? Literally every Chad I’ve ever met has been super chill.
When you play the Game of Life on Easy Mode, it's easy being chill.
 

sangheilios

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I personally think the abundance argument is overblown. A person can mentally focus on one or two people at a given time.
The issue they are referring to is something else. Imagine being in the position of a typical woman, where you have 2 dozen matches or more that would be willing to go out on a date with you. They obviously pass the basic standard test, so you then go out on dates with women. You find one cute but you don't like her sense of humor, so you quickly next her because you know you have 23 girls left to date. You go out on another day but she does some weird thing with her nails that you find annoying, so that's not it. It goes on and on and on. This **** is one of the reasons why so many women are still single as they approach 30 or possibly past this mark.

Before dating apps, people were less likely to next each other because they didn't have a ridiculous degree of perceived abundance. If you passed the basic compatibility stuff you try to work out differences or accept flaws, etc.

Now, this whole abundance thing is basically limited to females and exceptionally desirable men, I'm talking celebrities, pro athletes, etc. Most guys are lucky to get even a handful of matches on a dating app, let alone actually going out on dates with these matches.
 

HaleyBaron

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The dating apps are doing exactly as they are supposed to do. After over ten years of using them, they have optimized themselves precisely as they should have. They are doing business exactly as they want it, cause of the way male and female dynamics work. And since women always have the choosing power on these apps, just like they do in real life, it's just mirroring current society. It's not dating apps fault.
 

Fruitbat

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Women have so much abundance on dating apps (the leading way people are now meeting). They have no incentive but to select for the highest value men.

Also, a low six figure salary doesn't mean jack shiit in a lot of US metros, including my home metropolitan area of Dallas, Texas. There was a thread on this forum started in April 2023 about high five figure and low six figure men struggling. In Dallas, there's not much of an income advantage until $150,000 annual salary and even that's debatable. It might even be higher than that.


The typical Millennial or Gen Z White woman expects a 6'0"+ man.
growing up my friend was 5’9 and I am 6’3

he has great facial genetics, very attractive whereas I’m pretty average.

He was the attraction, not me.

Atractiveness is more important than height.

height is only an issue if you’re average or really short - like 5’6 and below.
 

Gamisch

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The dating apps are doing exactly as they are supposed to do. After over ten years of using them, they have optimized themselves precisely as they should have. They are doing business exactly as they want it, cause of the way male and female dynamics work. And since women always have the choosing power on these apps, just like they do in real life, it's just mirroring current society. It's not dating apps fault.
Interesting take that I haven't heard before!

It's a perfect storm isn't it? The boom of the internet, modern dating and the logical outcome of apps to date people.

30 years ago nobody could forsee this. The most telling sign is that the rational male, considered as a bible in the manosphere ,yet talks about calling and texting.

Wanting to get rid of OLD is like wanna get rid of Amazon ,Uber and doordash; like wanna get rid of trains planes and telephone poles.

Will

Not

Happen
 

Gamisch

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The issue they are referring to is something else. Imagine being in the position of a typical woman, where you have 2 dozen matches or more that would be willing to go out on a date with you. They obviously pass the basic standard test, so you then go out on dates with women. You find one cute but you don't like her sense of humor, so you quickly next her because you know you have 23 girls left to date. You go out on another day but she does some weird thing with her nails that you find annoying, so that's not it. It goes on and on and on. This **** is one of the reasons why so many women are still single as they approach 30 or possibly past this mark.

Before dating apps, people were less likely to next each other because they didn't have a ridiculous degree of perceived abundance. If you passed the basic compatibility stuff you try to work out differences or accept flaws, etc.

Now, this whole abundance thing is basically limited to females and exceptionally desirable men, I'm talking celebrities, pro athletes, etc. Most guys are lucky to get even a handful of matches on a dating app, let alone actually going out on dates with these matches.
And let be real: 99% of men are in this position. I know I am...

Ive always been a "lazy DJ" as Ive been getting p00sy by ;
#getting introduced
#Getting approached
#OLD

Especially OLD = you are ALWAYS in a line up. I can't stand that. Even knowing I've "won the woman" and I've left behind a line up of dude ,it doesn't feel right.

Sometimes I have 3 women at once i am talking to and its already overwhelming because I wanna pick the best,the hottest and yet the most reliable...

I've ditched OLD and I simply live life like I always did: making luck happen by making preparation meet opportunity.
 

Hamurabimbi

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OLD worked as advertised for me. I was on less than 6 months. Got GF and then off. So. Tinder lost two customers because it did it’s job.
 

HaleyBaron

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Interesting take that I haven't heard before!

It's a perfect storm isn't it? The boom of the internet, modern dating and the logical outcome of apps to date people.

30 years ago nobody could forsee this. The most telling sign is that the rational male, considered as a bible in the manosphere ,yet talks about calling and texting.

Wanting to get rid of OLD is like wanna get rid of Amazon ,Uber and doordash; like wanna get rid of trains planes and telephone poles.

Will

Not

Happen
Social media and smartphones brought about the inevitable advancement of the courting system. Now you can court with anyone in the world, an inevitable outcome unless the internet goes down. I remember when there was an internet blackout essentially in our city. Suddenly, people were going outside and socializing. Shows how much of a spell the online technology has over humanity.

Technology optimized dating, so now everyone is playing on higher standards, men and women. The one problem is that women can hold out on sex and for the right man far easier than men can. Us men want to find a woman and **** her every day of the week, so we have smaller patience and are more willing to settle. Women are not cause they are constantly bombarded and reinforced to find the one guy who is not only hot looking but will take her on trips to show off on instagram so she can grow her social status.

Back in the internetless days, this was the equivalent of the woman finding the top guy in her town and then walking about with him to show off she's a big deal. Today, she can project it to everyone. I don't give af who Kim Kardasian is, but thanks to the internet, I'm forced to keep hearing her name and seeing her. And if someone unwilling like me keeps running into that, imagine the women that want to look for that stuff.
 

needimprovement250

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It's like the elephant in the room. To " just be Chad " isn't enough anymore resulting in more men doubting their ability to attract women.
Yep it’s like due to inflation in the dating world, it has become “just be GigaChad”

1. There is ALWAYS a bigger better and stronger dude around the corner.

2. Women get bored...
This is true, and he could only be one swipe away. That’s why a lot of women will continue to use OLD in secret to try and level up from the guy they already did find from OLD. Them getting bored is also why we’ve seen an uptick in recent years of women asking their man for an open relationship, and they rarely mean that he should go out and sleep with other women, she just wants to cuck him. Men who went along with this and started hooking up with hotter women had their gf/wife try to end the open relationship as soon as that happened.
 

needimprovement250

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Face. Not body, is king on OLD. So unless these 6-pack, jacked guys have a really good face, girls are just going to swipe past his profile picture and never see his 6-pack.
Exactly and that’s what they’ll look at first. In addition to the fact that most guys with six packs don’t have that as their first pic, so they would have to like his face and check out his other pics to even see that.

Looks matter more than personality.
When it comes to OLD, absolutely. You can’t really get a feel for someone’s personality from an OLD profile, so looks are really all that matters on the apps. In person approaching seems to be where personality comes into play a little more, but even in that scenario good looks are what gets their attention in the first place and your personality determines wether or not you’ll keep her attention.
 

MatureDJ

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... we’ve seen an uptick in recent years of women asking their man for an open relationship, and they rarely mean that he should go out and sleep with other women, she just wants to cuck him.
Women understand that their Beta Bob husband will probably be unsuccessful, while they will have a decent chance of upgrading, at least physically - thus Beta Bob is relegated to a parking orbit, but sexed just enough so that he doesn't get angry enough to leave.

If ever my woman were to say that to me, I would respond with:
The only reason that men marry women is to ensure that the children that come out of the womb is theirs, and open marriage is basically saying that your womb is open to others. AFAIC, this marriage is OVER.
And yes, this is a hypothetical response. :mad:
 

SmoothSmooth

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How many times do I have to repeat this for you incels

WOMEN DO NOT RESPECT THE MEN ON DATING APPS
YOUR COMPETITION IS NOT ON THE INTERNET
ONLY UGLY WOMEN AND REJECTS ACTUALLY USE DATING APPS SERIOUSLY

YOUR COMPETITION IS

*THE HOT GUY THAT COLD APPROACHED HER
*THE GUYS WHO HAVE POWER AT HER WORKPLACE/UNIVERSITY/SPORTS CENTRE
*THE POPULAR MUSICIAN WHO OPENS AT THE GIG SHE GOES TO
*THE HOT GUY OUT WITH HIS FRIENDS THAT SHE MEETS ON SPRING BREAK/VACAY/AT AN UPSCALE BAR
*THE CHARISMATIC MAN IN HER APARTMENT COMPLEX
Etc

Not the good looking 4cmx4cm replaceable pixel that dry messages her on an app with 200 other men/day…

IF she’s going to stan over any man on the internet it will be a famous YouTuber/musician with 100s thousands of fans etc

the reason why most men are struggling with women in the modern era is because most men are not sexually appealing in the modern era (ie beta, lacking social confidence, lacking orginality/flair)
 
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MatureDJ

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How many times do I have to repeat this for you incels

WOMEN DO NOT RESPECT THE MEN ON DATING APPS
YOUR COMPETITION IS NOT ON THE INTERNET
ONLY UGLY WOMEN AND REJECTS ACTUALLY USE DATING APPS SERIOUSLY

YOUR COMPETITION IS

*THE HOT GUY THAT COLD APPROACHED HER
*THE GUYS WHO HAVE POWER AT HER WORKPLACE/UNIVERSITY/SPORTS CENTRE
*THE POPULAR MUSICIAN WHO OPENS AT THE GIG SHE GOES TO
*THE HOT GUY OUT WITH HIS FRIENDS THAT SHE MEETS ON SPRING BREAK/VACAY/AT AN UPSCALE BAR
*THE CHARISMATIC MAN IN HER APARTMENT COMPLEX
Etc

Not the good looking 4cmx4cm replaceable pixel that dry messages her on an app with 200 other men/day…

IF she’s going to stan over any man on the internet it will be a famous YouTuber/musician with 100s thousands of fans etc

the reason why most men are struggling with women in the modern era is because most men are not sexually appealing in the modern era (ie beta, lacking social confidence, lacking orginality/flair)
It's OVER for MoggedByCompetitionCels.
 

SW15

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Before dating apps, people were less likely to next each other because they didn't have a ridiculous degree of perceived abundance. If you passed the basic compatibility stuff you try to work out differences or accept flaws, etc.
The ridiculous perceived abundance is mostly a female thing.

There's a lot of talk on this forum about how the ridiculous perceived abundance allows women to put up big notch counts. Big notch counts can happen. A woman has the potential to have sex with as many partners as she desires because the demand for her is endless. However, that's not necessarily how it works for most women, even women that have sex with many men as a result of using swipe apps (and Instagram DMs to a lesser extent).

Most men on swipe apps fail to have sex with women with such abundance. Most women have something like "1-2 dates, no sex, no extended relationship" with men from swipe apps. If a woman has sex with 3 men from swipe apps in a 4 month period, she likely rejected around 10-15 men after 1-2 dates during that same period, plus the hundreds of men who never made it out of her swipe queue or the in-app messaging/text messaging/phone call stage.

The same is true of women using Instagram DMs for finding dates.

The typical 33 year old "average" or "mid-tier woman on a dating app has more abundance than the supermodels of the 1980s/early 1990s of the tail end of the pre-internet era. Elle MacPherson (SI Swimsuit Issue cover model 1986-1988) or Kathy Ireland (SI Swimsuit Issue cover model 1989, 1992) never got to experience the abundance that average women on swipe apps experience. In their late 1980s-early 1990s primes, MacPherson and Ireland were approached in nightlife venues and on the streets a good amount. They couldn't be DM'ed. If a random guy lacked in-person access to them, he would have to write a letter (either handwritten or typed) and send it to the modeling agency. That involves either putting pen to paper, typing/printing out paper, getting an envelope, putting postage on it, and finding a mailbox to drop it in. That took far more effort than just sending a DM on Instagram.

While MacPherson and Ireland had access to fewer men in those days, they tended to only take approaches from pro athletes, famous men in the arts (actors, artists, top photographers), and rich businessmen seriously. MacPherson dated Billy Joel, was married to some photographer for 3 years with no children, had a 9 year non-marital relationship with some rich businessman (in her 30s-early 40s) resulting in 2 children and then had a another failed marriage in her 40s/50s with another rich guy.

Now, this whole abundance thing is basically limited to females and exceptionally desirable men, I'm talking celebrities, pro athletes, etc. Most guys are lucky to get even a handful of matches on a dating app, let alone actually going out on dates with these matches.
The men with abundance tend to do things differently than the women with abundance. Men are less likely to exit after 1-2 dates with no sex by their own choice. Men with abundance will "hit it and quit it". Short men sex with multiple women and sometimes overlapping. They'll avoid making the commitment while having sex if they can do it.
 

Manure Spherian

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I live in Central Jersey and I can't tell you how many times I see guys in their 30s and 40s who are 20 to 50 lbs overweight, going bald and dress like GD bums (jogging pants, hoodies, etc)
I think likely a chunk of them are married with kids. So they might be out and about not caring about appearances. I dress more casual when doing errands but I wear the form fitting and stylish athletic sportswear that’s out there now. There are even sweatpants out there now that don’t make men look like sloppy bums.

I don’t see going bald as a sign of carelessness. My hair ranks as Norwood 3 vertex. I just mark sure to get haircuts suitable for me (wife is a hairstylist).
 

Manure Spherian

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ONLY UGLY WOMEN AND REJECTS ACTUALLY USE DATING APPS SERIOUSLY
Does this go for my corporate executive pretty cousin who met her handsome, film director husband on Tinder?
 
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