I don't know what made me think about this, but I got to thinking randomly about clubs...

Why do so many guys depend on night clubs to meet women?

Night Clubs have to be the absolute worst place on earth to try to meet a woman.

They are carefully designed to make profit off of your failure to score at the club.

Clubs wouldn't be profitable if everyone went there and brought home a woman every night, because there would be no repeat business.

Let's look at the layout. First of all, it's at night. I don't know about you, but I normally don't even think about sex much during the day... but it's like around 8:30 ish, something insides me goes off.. I’m like "damn, I need some ass"

There is liquor. All types. Whatever you like, they have. Not only do they make an unreal profit off the sale of it, the more you take, the more your game is thrown off.

Then, the clubs always have some type of promotions to let women in free, discounted prices.

Girls get together and say "damn girl, it's Friday night, let's do something fun!! Yeah girl, let's go clubbing"

Why not? It's cheap as hell, usually free. A woman MIGHT have to spend 10 dollars at a club.. and that is usually the door fee, if there is one. If she is half ass decent, she wont' have to buy a drink the entire night, she can drink as much as she wants, and she gets to let guys gawk at how attractive she is, even if she really isn't!! I mean damn, does it get any better?

Then you have the women, who come in the most scantily clad clothes then can find.. I swear a woman would wear a thong and tittie tape to the club if they could get away with it, so they can get more drinks/attention, whatever it is women want. not **** however. Everything except ****.

Then you have the average guy, who works a regular 9-5, makes about 22k a year and the highlight of his week is going to the club to basically look at women having fun with each other. A normal guy will spend about 30-40 dollars in a club, single or not. Buying girls drinks, paying the door fee, sometimes, buying food. Think about it, a nice sized club has about 300 guys in it, they have made 12k in one night off of guys not scoring.

Back to the average guy, because it's worse than money. He sees a girl.. let's say she's a 6.5, maybe a 7. She is with her friends, who probably all look better and have been getting dances all night from guys, drinks, etc. So she feels left out. She catches this average guy looking at her and lets him approach, buy drinks, dance, maybe even pet with him a little.. not because she likes him mind you, but simply because she wants to have something to brag about to her friends on the way home WITH THEM (not you) "yeah girl, I know what you mean, this guy was all on me, but I had to tell him I have a man at home, blah blah blah".

The poor guy, goes home.. no no, even worse, is with his guy friend, who is just as average as he is, and on the way home, they are talking about how the "women are all on them" and how they HAVE TO come back the next night to get some more "action"

happens EVERY Thursday, Friday and Saturday night in every major city in America.

Now, can taking a woman home from a club happen. Of course. But ****, why work harder than you have to? I am a good looking, young, very successful 22 year old guy.. why put myself into a situation where every last one of my advantages are taken away? As good looking as I am, there are 10 other guys hounding every decent girl in the club, I'm a number. And yes, I am a DJ and yes If push came to shove, I could, and have pulled a couple from the club, but it can be and it was harder than necessary, when there were times I would walk into say, Best Buy to pick up a new movie, and I would see a cutie and strike up a conversation, where I am at an extreme advantage because of my communication skills and there are no other guys in the current competition, and I would walk out of the store with a movie, and someone to watch it with later this week :yes:

then these are the same guys that laugh at guys that go to strip clubs. The only difference between a strip club and a regular club is that in the regular club, the money you spend goes to the club, in the strip club, it goes to the woman. And the guy at the strip club (at least, theoretically) knows he isn't going to score with the woman who is giving him attention.

And there are so many books, articles, threads on succeeding in clubs, when it's a loosing proposition in the first place.

I go to clubs once in a blue moon. I like to dance, my life really doesn't allow for a lot of club time. If you do go to clubs, understand what you are doing. You have to go in with the correct mind set. I would never again go to the club again if I don't have a woman either on call or at home that I can call up and have sex with. That way I am not in need of sex.

the only guy who has a chance in hell at the club of scoring on a regualr basis is the guy who honestly doesn't need the woman, nor is he there for them, he's there to enjoy himself. No matter how good looking you are... that's just more bragging room for the girl to say what type of guy she rejected "yeah girl I had this FINE guy on me, and I was like damn dude, stop sweating me, I don't like you like that".

Women just don't go to clubs to find men. As much as we say it, few people understand it.

My old oneitis, who I talk to about once a week, does this. She and her friends will go to the club, with literarily, no more than 5 bucks in their pocket, and come home with pictures of guys that were hounding them, drunk off drinks guys bought them all night with hopes of intimacy. In 5 years of going to the club (18 and up clubs, now she is 22), she has NEVER left home with a guy, given a guy her real phone number, or taken a guy she meet at a club seriously in any way shape or form. All she does is brag about how many guys tried to talk to her and about how many drinks got bought for her.. but all women do this, it's the equivalent to us guys talking about how many points we scored in a pickup game of basketball.. it's like a sport for women, no need to hold it against them, just don't play apart of it.

backbreaker said:

I don't know what made me think about this, but I got to thinking randomly about clubs...

Why do so many guys depend on night clubs to meet women?

Night Clubs have to be the absolute worst place on earth to try to meet a woman.

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I dunno man.....my experiences with clubs have been a little different. Met my last g/f at a club and had a great LTR with her. Didn't end well, but thats beside the point.

The clubbin thing can work especially well if you become a regular at one or two places. You can get to know the staff and the regulars (guys and girls) and it leads to a lot of opportunities.

I don't really use clubs as a pickup venue so much as I use them for meeting up with friends. I try to network with as many females as possible cause I know that even if I'm not attrcted to them, they always have hot friends that they bring along from time to time.

A few weeks ago I ran into a girl who used to bartend at a downtown bar I used to frequent. This girl is 26 and smokin hot. She threw me her digits without even having to ask. Never would have gotten reconnected with her if it weren't for going to a club that night....

Last night I went to a club with a girl I know. She brought her friends from work. Danced with these chicks most of the night (in between dancing with other women we know that are regulars there). A few hours and a couple of drinks later and I had one of her friends butt ass naked in my bed. I seriously doubt that this would have gone down had it not been for being at the club.

Similar thing a couple of weeks ago......hit a club with some friends, ended up in my jacuzzi till sunrise with a friend of a friend.

I guess we all have different means to an end, just like ith money.

backbreaker said:

the only guy who has a chance in hell at the club of scoring on a regualr basis is the guy who honestly doesn't need the woman, nor is he there for them, he's there to enjoy himself.

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backbreaker,

say, for example, someone stumbled upon this website, and fully embrassed and followed its guidelines for 12 months he'd have 'a chance in hell of scoring on a regular basis'.

Lets add to this; This guy may enjoy this particular type of music, may enjoy drinking, socialising - hell, if this guy has embrassed this site, he's probably even got some connections and will often score some free drinks himself.

Of course - this is all hypothetical.

But just pretend that it happened.

Would it be OK for this guy to go to a club?

Errrr. I am this guy. I guess its not especially hypothetical.

I go clubbing all the time. I'm not going to claim some giant number of Lays from club extractions. But I am going to claim a giant number of kiss/number closes leading into day 2s. Which is why I question alot of your assumptions. Experience tells me other wise.

three12.

three12 said:

backbreaker,

say, for example, someone stumbled upon this website, and fully embrassed and followed its guidelines for 12 months he'd have 'a chance in hell of scoring on a regular basis'.

Lets add to this; This guy may enjoy this particular type of music, may enjoy drinking, socialising - hell, if this guy has embrassed this site, he's probably even got some connections and will often score some free drinks himself.

Of course - this is all hypothetical.

But just pretend that it happened.

Would it be OK for this guy to go to a club?

Errrr. I am this guy. I guess its not especially hypothetical.

I go clubbing all the time. I'm not going to claim some giant number of Lays from club extractions. But I am going to claim a giant number of kiss/number closes leading into day 2s. Which is why I question alot of your assumptions. Experience tells me other wise.

three12.

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lol, don't get it twisted man... It's not that I haven't ever had success at clubs. I have. I don't know the number of women I have taken home, not a huge amount, but enough, maybe 3 or 4 in 5 years, gotten a ton of numbers, alot of them fake, alot not... I originally met about 3 girls that I eventually dated for a while, one being a stripper.

Like I said, the entire point wasn't to say it isn't possible, and dont' take it as such an ego hit. It's just that you have to admit, it's not a situtation that is designed for success of men bedding women.

And yes, everything you said was true, but that's not the point of the post. I am not damming clubs, and it isn't a pissing contest.

I love going to clubs, but I don't go as much because I am usually at home with a girl or over a girls house on a weekend night, or I am working... there are times we might go out but I meet enough women during the day time to keep my nightlife busy without having to go to clubs to meet women. That's not a hit on any guy here, it's just my life. If that weren't the case, which it hasn't always been, even somewhat recently in all honestly, then I have no problem in going out by myself to a club on a say, friday night. However, when I do, I dont' go to meet women I go to have fun.

STR8UP, I hate to be blunt, but you and I are different from regular people... we have money. Girls look at the clothes I wear, they might see the car I drove if they catch a glance at it, and in all honestly, most of the time, unless she is seriously attached to her man or she just finds me repusing, which doesn't happen, it's a downhill race. But I am not an average guy (Which makes it harder becuase I have to not only decide if i like her, i have to decide does she actually LIKE me)

Note I said average guy.. now, in all honestly, there isn't a guy here that is average, because everyone here knows what it takes to be successful with women. However, with that said, even I, a man who has financial means and is at the worst decent looking, is at a disadvantage to a HB8 with a 2 inch skirt on wtih 10 guys standing around her, when I can meet that same girl 12 hours later at say, a line in Mcdonalds, and get her with ease.

backbreaker said:

STR8UP, I hate to be blunt, but you and I are different from regular people... we have money. Girls look at the clothes I wear, they might see the car I drove if they catch a glance at it, and in all honestly, most of the time, unless she is seriously attached to her man or she just finds me repusing, which doesn't happen, it's a downhill race. But I am not an average guy (Which makes it harder becuase I have to not only decide if i like her, i have to decide does she actually LIKE me)

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Hey uh, so what do you guys actually do, just curious/

backbreaker said:

Like I said, the entire point wasn't to say it isn't possible, and dont' take it as such an ego hit. It's just that you have to admit, it's not a situtation that is designed for success of men bedding women.

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backbreaker,

My ego is safe. I assure you of that. A hit on clubs isn't a hit on myself.

Also its interesting, you meet enough girls in the day to fill your nightlife. Thats cool. I respect that. At the same time. If I chose to, I could have my nightlife filled with girls which I have met at clubs.

I'm not rich. I'm a student. I don't have the luxury of girls seeing my car, or my clothes.

I am cool - its not so easy to define as rich.

I am a conversationalist. I am sexual. I am not desperate. I am ambitious.

I find that girls pick up on these qualities easily.

We both know that there is 100s of ways to play the game. I don't think you should be leading newbies into your veiws on clubs - which obviously differ from the norm - and then go on to state that your money helps you attract girls. I don't think many of us will find money as quickly as you have.

For the record - What situation IS designed for the success of men bedding women?

three12.

No problem.

Star8up from what I can tell is apart of the Russian Mob and I am a true to live Pimp

Seriously, Str8up is in real estate and I am somewhat retired from a computer company I started 5 years ago, but now I am a professional handicapper and I make more money doing that then I did with the company I owned.

I mean, I don't have a Bently, but The car I usually drive out is not a car you can be broke and afford to drive.

I don't and never will come out and tell a woman I have alot of money, but I am sure they figure out I am well off sooner rather than later.

but all of this is getting off of the point. The point is, even in when I wasn't well off, I COULD every once in a while, get lucky (and at the time it was just that, getting lucky) and take someone home (I did one time), but it was so much luck and in the end it was too much work.

Even now, I understand that you don't succeed in anything by putting yourself in loosing situtations, even if you are better than the average joe, I am going to maximize my potential. On the average day, I might see 20-25 women that I think are good looking enough to have sex with, but I will bypass all of them to wait until a weekend night to talk to these same women, only now they have ****blocking friends, ***** shields and all of the other advantages I listed?

lol, I will tell you something I do however.. if I see a girl that I think is cute in the club, I will talk to her, and find out what she does, and when I am thinking about it, make sure I accidently bump into it one day, that way her defenses are down. She may remember me, she may not, but usually she does. I dont do it alot but I have done it a couple of times, and it has worked both times. Alot of women have a rule that they will not talk to a guy in the club, just for the sake of not talking to a guy in the club, but if you meet that same woman in say, Wal Mart, her defenses are down.

three12 said:

backbreaker,

My ego is safe. I assure you of that. A hit on clubs isn't a hit on myself.

Also its interesting, you meet enough girls in the day to fill your nightlife. Thats cool. I respect that. At the same time. If I chose to, I could have my nightlife filled with girls which I have met at clubs.

I'm not rich. I'm a student. I don't have the luxury of girls seeing my car, or my clothes.

I am cool - its not so easy to define as rich.

I am a conversationalist. I am sexual. I am not desperate. I am ambitious.

I find that girls pick up on these qualities easily.

We both know that there is 100s of ways to play the game. I don't think you should be leading newbies into your veiws on clubs - which obviously differ from the norm - and then go on to state that your money helps you attract girls. I don't think many of us will find money as quickly as you have.

For the record - What situation IS designed for the success of men bedding women?

three12.

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It's not MY view on clubbing.. it's the blueprint for a successful club. It's the blueprint for every successful club in america.

Lots of women, liquor and charge guys 5-20 dollars at the door. the more women the better, so let them in free if you have to, just get them there, because a club isn't a club without women.

No where did I say not go to a club, but that's just how clubs are setup. I didn't say you couldn't be successful, I said it wasn't setup for you to succeed.

What IS the right circumstance to meet a woman? The question is, what isn't.

The mall, work, grocery stores, book stores, gas stations, resturants, SCHOOL, airports, hotel lobbies, the street, etc. I can go on and on.

Nothing is designed per say for a man to just succeed with a woman, unless you are just paying for it... but clubs are definatly designed for you NOT to succeed with women.. there is no money, no return on investment, in you taking a woman home your first time going to a club.

backbreaker said:

there is no money, no return on investment, in you taking a woman home your first time going to a club.

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Then there is no return on investment in prostitution?

what do I have to use a bullhorn?

THE AVERAGE GUY spends 30-40 dollars in a club.

Even now, lets say a female and I decide to hit the club. The door is 10 bucks, that's 20. We each get 3 drinks at 5 a pop, that's 30 bucks. Not necessarly alot, but there are other guys in the club as well.

I go myself. 10 dollars to get in. I am going to drink.. at least 3.. that's 25 by myself.

So I am not going to not drink just to prove a point that I dont' have to spend money, I am going to have a good time.

Even when I was an AFc, I never bought a girl that wasn't with me a drink, doesn't make much sense. However, If I take you out, than I have no problem with it. Even girls I know if I just happen to see them there I won't buy them anything, there are other guys there doing that.

is prositutation a return on investment... In a way yes, in a way no. If I am a sex starved guy who hasn't sniffed ***** in years, then yes, 100 or so bucks to have sex is a small price to pay to get sexual satisfaction.

HOwever, more times than not, no.

But then again, cars demish in value the second they drive off the lot, but it doesn't stop us from buying them every 2 or so years.

Again this thread isn't meant to be a pissing contest, and still, I have never said that not one person on here couldn't succed in a club envrioment, I simply said that it was the worst possible place to meet a woman, let alone have a LTR with. It's possible, I know someone who married a woman who he met in a club but still no one has been able to refute the facts that I laid out, all you have said is how you have succeed in spite of, which is a good thing, but it just goes to prove my point

Man I used to be a rock musician and one thing I notice now is. CLUBS ARE SO RIDICULOUSLY ****ING LOUD!

I like going to them, but I know what you mean. Some solid day game can make the need to pickup at clubs not so great. BUt that makes it even more fun to go out and talk to girls!

that's another point I didn't even think of. Most guys can't talk to women in the DAY TIME, let alone in a night club, which takes considerably more skill.

backbreaker said:

that's another point I didn't even think of. Most guys can't talk to women in the DAY TIME, let alone in a night club, which takes considerably more skill.

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Of course, by practicing at night in difficult clubs, daytime sarging becomes a turkey shoot. Or so I'm told.

or the other way around.. the guy gets rejected so hard at night that he is petrified to talk to a woman in the day time out of fear of rejection

i disagree in that it is easy to go to clubs and score.

forget the chumps...the clubs feed off them. that's how clubs make money.

all you gotta do is look&smell good, and confidently go talk to some girls. dance if you want. and close. i didn't read many articles, but i just did a lot of daytime approached, got my confidence up, and once i started frequenting clubs...other than my first time, i didn't go to one and not close in some form. meaning makeout or take a girl home. forget numbers, they're meaningless.

everyone's different so what works for some guys may not work for others.

but i gotta say, i'd prefer the best buy scenario also...

hey bb, you live in the south if i'm not mistaken?

well i ask because i used as well, and the best buy scenario would be much more easily accomplished in southern states imo.

when i was in the south, girls would smile and wave at me. girls i didn't know at all would approach me and say "hi" or wave. i found approaching to be a natural, normal way to meet women.

fast forward to today...i've been living in a small town in central cali for about 3 months. the atmosphere is much more conservative. i haven't noticed 1 girl smile at me in 3 months. forget getting laid, approaching girls seems almost frowned upon (i've done it a few times here and people look at you like you're from another planet...whereas in the south it was sooo well received). most girls are snobbish and people in general seem very reserved. i'd taken the whole "southern hospitality" thing for granted.

in general, girls here seem almost bashful about their sexual desires. i have no doubt there are girls attracted to me here, but it is nearly impossible to notice or find out. i've given up and accepted that i probably won't get laid for another year or two.

you are really lucky to live in an area where girls are not like they are here.

to be honest, i don't go to clubs any more either. haven't since i moved here. i don't drink any more, and i don't even sleep past 11pm most nights. changed my whole lifestyle. it's not just clubs or alcohol, it's the women and the people that frequent them...it's a wasted opportunity.

you know, even though it was an easy way to score, i made a decision to never go back because if you sit and think about it, all that time could have been devoted otherwise. you're certainly right...it's too much effort. too much time and wasted sleep/health. sure i'm not getting laid now, but clubs are out of question.

i may not get laid in a while, not for as long as i live her probably. although, i've been thinking of moving down to southern cali. girls there are much more sexually comfortable. it's as easy as taking the bus or going to the grocery store.

BB made some good points in this post. The only thing I'm going to comment on is that going to a club for the sake of having fun alone is 100% the right mentality.

Don't get me wrong I still go with the notion of getting a number or two but for me it's a given after the hard years I put into clubbing exprience. Also note my location which is unlike any venue for clubbing in america since the club explosion out here saturated LV with the longest night life in the country. My situation is anything but average which is why I really don't have too much to comment on in this particular club thread because I don't know what the average situation is like anymore...if I ever did.

i will say it again, because ovbiously on one is listening.. I never said you couldn't score in a club.. I said it is probably the worst place on earth to meet a woman out of all of the posibilities, yet so much interest/effort is put into it.

PRMoon said:

BB made some good points in this post. The only thing I'm going to comment on is that going to a club for the sake of having fun alone is 100% the right mentality.

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Amen to that

Without a doubt the lowest quality girls I've pulled have been from clubs. It is the home of the attention *****. I never was the guy who was all about going to a club every weekend to stand there like a fool and gawk at the half naked women. Sure enough though I would always get dragged out to them when I was younger. Its funny though cause it is pretty much how you summed it up. Last call hits and the ugly lights come on all that you see are a bunch of dude closing big tabs and walking out with the guys they came in with. The same guy who will walk in the next weekend with the glimmer in his eye that tonights the night and he will hook up.

The thing that has always gotten me is that these guys are usually all good guys. I have a problem with talking to anyone and everyone when I leave my place. I'll usually bull**** with guys around me at a club and except the over the top egomanical sociopath type most club guys could pick up those girls in different circumstances. Most people just have the misconception that you cannot pick women up except at places like clubs or bars.