This is a rhetorical question, but yet I am running into a problem again.

I have had a 3 year relationship which ended last year. Other than that one, most of mine have been on the order of a few months before they failed.

Can you imagine how upsetting it can be to have a girl you met, seduced and banged regularly to start flaking on you?

So on this DJ forum I have always found a lack of good info on how to keep a relationship going, once it is in fact a relationship.

I think somewhere at the root of it is a fault in how I interact with my gf of choice over time. I wish i knew more what the answers are.

In any event it seems like i have girls with very high interest at first and at times it starts to keep falling. It's like I can't relate to them.

I am really in love with a girl now, it's different than any of the other dozens of girls I've dated, yet i am really scared that this one is ending too, for a number of reasons.

Am I left at the end thinking it's my fault, or hers. Why does every relationship have to crash and burn?

I think the problem lies in the fact that you get so worked up with a girl that you start acting AFC and not even realize it until it is too late.

The best way to keep a girl, from personal experience and maintain her interest, is to just relax and not have any expectations from the beginning. In other words don't get too emotionally involved and adopt a detached attitude.

Originally posted by sapphire
...not have any expectations from the beginning...

Click to expand...

Truer words were never spoken. There is much wisdom in that sentence.

If you like fishing, then you'll know that just being on the water and enjoying the sound of the waves clapping gently against the side of the boat and the sun on your face and the absence of phones and faxes and computers and so forth is the whole exercise. If, perchance, you happen to catch a fish, that's just a happy bonus, a fortunate result of circumstances.

Same thing goes with the beginning of a relationship. Enjoy the time togther with her. Have fun. Fool around. Do "couples" stuff that you wouldn't otherwise do. If, perchance, you happen to fall in love and she with you, that's just a happy bonus, a fortunate result of circumstances.

Good luck!

This is more of a case where she fell for me hard and i reciprocated!

Our biggest problem right now is distance and time together.

But after dating tons of girls, this one is more what I'm looking for.

We had a nice talk last night. I told her we need to take the pressure of ourselves (she was talking about moving with me to the town I'm moving to soon). The moving and all it entails was stressing her out and causing a bit of a problem between us.

I think i was premature in thinking it was over. We are both being careful though...

Keep her intrigued, keep her guessing, keep her feelin' good.

-Al