I've been on sosuave.com reading some tips and posts and must say am rather impressed with the majority of the advice. Below are somes things i've learned from knowledge and experience.

* Intelligent men DO fail with women, but only because they beat themselves

I should know. Like the title of this post taken from the computer in the movie Wargames. A military computer tries to win a game of Global Thermal Nuclear War by constantly playing both the Russian and US sides. It never wins. It plays out thousands and thousands of scenerios, only to discover the only winning move is not to play.

Like the computer in Wargames, i would find myself constantly beating myself up and drawing false conclusions based on imcomplete data and feedback, thus never 'winning' so to speak.

The lesson to be learned from this is not to play the game. Be yourself and go after who and what you want, but sincerely and with good intentions (providing they show some interest in you first or mutually as well). What i mean is, if you're doing things that are part of the game (ie. phone calling after x amount of time etc.), the girl most likely knows what you're doing anyway.

What's more, did you ever think that the girl will often play the 'game' too? If you're both playing, but are not on the same page or even in the same book for that matter, nothing will get done and only misinterpretations leading to resentfullness will occur.

If she likes you enough, and has a considerable amount of interest, no games are necessary. The 'game' are for insecure people trying to find some answers. I do recommend it, but only if you're not going to be serious with someone in a longer term relationship. It will only likely attract those girls who are insecure with themselves and do not know what they want. When you're ready to get serious, be a leader with confidence, with passion, and the right 'type' of girl will be attracted to you as much as you are to her. Do not overthink or overanalyze, just get to know her and do things with her.

Recently, i have been taking my own advice above and is working pretty well. A very pretty, popular and intelligent girl made me aware of her by introducing herself, and now i'm taking my time gettiing to know her better. Things are going good, wish me luck , because no matter who or what, a little luck never hurts either!

Good luck to you tm. Keep me posted.

RE:

girl: I dont like guys who play games...
girl: you're cool and friendly but Im not looking for anyone right now

girl: {ends up in bed with her ex a-hole boyfriend or some ****y guy at the bar that just fed her a line of bs she knows is bs}

guy: I dont get it...what am I doing wrong
girl: you're not doing anything wrong, youre a great guy and will meet someone who'll be lucky to be with you. (kiss on the cheek)

guy: thanks...smiles.

guy: (goes home still not getting laid)




MORAL: In a perfect world this should never happen.

"girl: I dont like guys who play games...

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Hey Seldom, yeah, that is definitely what you get with flakey/flighty types that are very insecure with themselves (which you find frequent the bar scene). They're used to sheep, guys that follow everyone else in how they act and dress (ie. hat backwards etc.)., not natural leader material, it is foreign to them. Only when they grow out of this does it become more of what and who they want, because they're ready to be more serious. Some people never grow up though.

RE:

I dont know man because I think alot of it is just built in responses that goes with human psychology. I really can't say that all girls like that are immature or young because I've seen older women like that too (and men) People want what they can't have. Thats an age old proverb or whatever. The more challenging something is for them to obtain the more they desire it and many people have learned to use that to their advantage.

If I dont call my girlfriend for a day she wont dump me and call me out. No she'll have a feeling of fear and anxiety overcome her thinking that I might not want her anymore. And for that reason she'll keep calling my phone wondering whats going on. Its human nature. Even if she doesnt she'll have a rush of anxiety and passion and anger come over her.

Oh yeah Seldom, i agree with the part about people want what they can't have to an extent.

Some people do never grow up though, and alot of it stems from their insecurities. I've found the people that really want what they can't have are really the more insecure people and the ones who never do usually get what they want. The more secure a person is in their abilites, they already know they can usually acheive or get what they want.

It goes without say, knowing and going for what you want is attractive. I find it attractive in women too. If you play to someones insecurites you'll win almost every time, but if someone is mature they will know better how to deal and do deal with any insecurities they have, thus writing off anything that exploits them as inconsiderate or non-appropriate.

Nothing attracts women more than a man who is happily pursuing his own life's passions.

If you want to stand out with the ladies, then do the opposite of what you see the other guys around you doing with them and develop your own style (how you dress, walk, talk, etc.) and I guarantee you the ladies will take notice.

They really do get tired of seeing guys who all act the same, talk the same, etc.

Oh yeah, deciple so do i, and i'm not even a chic!

I think the more flakey/flighty types will always go for that though.

Also, a girl that is immature and/or flakey/flighty couldn't give a rat's ass about a guy will longer term goals, because it just isn't on her mind. She would rather have the drama than the stability of a good relationship.

Re: RE:

Originally posted by SeldomSeen
MORAL: In a perfect world this should never happen.

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Really, explain this. Why cant things happen because they are suppossed to?

that movie was the ****....!

I know that speaking for myself, that overthinking things can easily ruin my game and I've seen it hurt other guys' game.

I think it's best to forget about all of the rules sometimes and just go off instinct, instead of trying to think and strategize everything.

Originally posted by SeldomSeen
People want what they can't have.

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So if people are content with what they have, not wanting more, do they have it all?

When you overthink, you're your own nemisis. If you're thinking about rules when talking with a girl, she'll often know what you're up to and even play along.

If you know how to naturally talk with people, have a good sense of humor, are a person with good long and short-term goals, you will attract a decent girl and vice-versa.

If you play a girl, you will only get an insecure, or immature girl, but if that's your goal than more power to you.

No one has it all DJDreamer (except Bill Gates). If we're talking about getting women, and women will chase what they feel they don't or cannot have, than we're going back to insecurities with themselves.

For example, a woman who finds a man much more attractive than her husband or boyfriend both in terms of looks and personality will not pursue or chase to be in a relationship with him if she is secure and things are going good in her current relationship. Now, if she is insecure with herself and/or not happy with her relationship or feel she settled and was shopping around for someone she deems more worthy, than she will make an effort to be with the other guy.

Actually...seldomseen's perspective makes sense if you think about it...

Those who appear content with what they have, not wanting more, give off an aura of having everything...they give off an aura of having millions stored up in a bank...

A good player appears not wanty while in reality he does want something...a good player appears to be a challenge so as to keep a woman's interest...

Any woman or girl with an IQ of a 100 or more is going to know when she is being played. If she is insecure and desparate or into the friends with benefits thing, then she will most likely play along if she finds you even remotely attractive and interesting.

The smarter girls are more commital and are not on the market to be played, but to find someone more like them in terms of goals etc.

How can you lose when your mental game is to not appear desperate?

It's sort of like a yin and yang thing...giving a little and withholding...seeking something while appearing to not seek...

Humm all you guys seem to have varying opinions and IMHO none of them are wrong. It all depends on what you wanna do, who you are dealing with, and your personality. While the basics of the so called "game" are the same i.e.; don't be a doormat, keeping your and her intrest up, don't be a pu$$y, etc. beyond that its kind of open. Its basically getting out there and doing it to find out what works with who. Some girls you might have pursue just a little and keep the fire lit under her tail. Others you just lay back and them come to you. There are those that you might have reach down and gain some of that acquired DJ knowledge you have gained. Some you have to be the "niceguy" , the one thats cool with everybody, gets along with everybody, and is generaly like all around. And there are some girls that you have to be straight up jerk and a$$hole with.
Different things work for different people.