View Full Version : Conversation Skills
05-06-2004, 08:32 PM
This one is self explanatory. I have NONE. I get numbers from women and my bad convo sends them running when I call. Have any of you guys out there had this problem b4? What are some ways to fine tune this skill?
05-07-2004, 05:34 AM
One thing I've found useful is to watch chat shows on tv, or listen to phone-ins on the radio. A good radio presenter can make conversation with the most difficult of people and is skilled at covering up periods of silence, and you can learn from this.
I wouldnt' worry about it too much though. Long chats on the phone with girls you have only just met are not such a good idea as you risk falling into LJBF. Just be polite, breezy, non-needy, use C&F and set up the date.
05-07-2004, 05:46 AM
Also, a good conversation is as much about listening as talking.
Most people, esp women, like to talk about themselves, so asking questions is a good way of getting the convo going.
Listen to the verbal and non-verbal clues the other person is giving you. Is she fishing for compliments? Giving you a come on? Trying to blow you off?
Women like 'phatic' communication, ie, they like to just let off steam about things, they don't really want you to solve their problems, just agree/be sympathetic but DON'T become an emotional tampon etc - your aim is to get the date.
Keep silent rather than gabble, as a slight pause (2-3 seconds) occasionally gives you time to think and will make you seem more in control. I do this all the time, especially at work when answering sales calls and find that women can get incredibly flustered (in a good way) by this.
When you close, don't make asking for a date a formal thing, eg 'would you like to come to the cinema with me' etc. Just say you've really enjoyed talking, but have to get on, so why don't the two of you meet up on Thursday for a drink (or whatever).
05-07-2004, 10:08 AM
A woman's idea of a conversation is her speaking a long monologue. Roll with it. Ask her some questions and when she rants, reflect that, but don't be afraid to call her on her sh-t. They like that.
Also, don't forget to talk about yourself a little, too, what you do, your hobbies, etc.
05-07-2004, 12:21 PM
take a public speaking class or toastmasters. but you also need "content", if you will. read a lot! about anything. think about taking an acting class or some comedy improve workshop somewhere.
and of course, the art of convo has much to do with listening as it does with talking yourself.
05-08-2004, 04:20 PM
Right on guys.
All good responses. Thanks 4 the feedback.
05-14-2004, 06:15 PM
one thing that has made me improve me communication skills a lot is watching howard stern....you might think the questions he asks women are too perverted , but everytime he hits it off pretty well with girls.is the way he talks... so focus on improving on your body language
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