I'm in angst-mode right now so bear with me. I really don't consider myself ugly or even average. I got 7.6 on HotorNot and 6.6 on FaceTheJury which has even more superficial standards. Yet, I don't understand why many people, both guys and girls, whom I have to interact with during the course of my day treat me like I am some kind of leper. I don't believe I have a rep nor do I have a smarmy, noisome personality. I'm just an ordinary guy with his own purpose and no axe to grind against anyone. Most of the women in my campus won't even look you in the eye unless you are the super-extroverted "Stifler" kind of guy with high cheekbones and gelled hair. Don't get me wrong. There are some who are not that shallow. I'm currently in a budding LTR with an HB6 who treats me like I'm her personal hero. I wish everybody else wouldn't inexplicably set up all these barriers against anyone who doesn't fit some BS ideal.
And no, I do not expect everyone to like me. I just wish I knew the direct cause of this pervasive alienation I feel wherever I go.

I've noticed some happenings like getting more than I ordered at McDonalds etc Like when we went there and 8 of us ordered the same thing and I got a larger coke etc...

Or I've been in queues at counters and I've been picked before people infront of me etc...


Being extrovert isn't really hard, just be outgoing, nice and funny towards everyone =)

Hey man, I don't really get your question. But I don't think any non-dandy guy thinks he's 'beautiful'. What helped me alot was walking straight (yeah I once was a skater and it was 'cool' to slump like a loser ) that's already a big upgrade for any man. Maybe you should smile more. If I look somebody in the eyes without a smile on my face I might be starting a fight by doing that over here. But if you smile, they always smile back. People like to act invisible, but as soon as you smile to them they're 'busted' and smile back cause you said hello, which is a rare thing in our modern society.

It is a fact though, that people treat good looking people better then ugly people. I studied a couple of essays on this for an exam in college for psychology. Basically they will forgive more to a pretty person, as where an ugly person makes a mistake it's taken way worse. This goes for anything apparently, social life, job applications even teachers get influenced by this in some way.

Then again as many chiqs on this board said already (well I only remember one, Tamales) it's not that you're ugly that bothers them if you're talking about apearance, but it's the fact that you do or don't take care of yourself. So clean yourself up (I'm not saying you're not clean, just in general), that helps.

Hope it helps.

Originally posted by Kineti[C]harm
IBeing extrovert isn't really hard, just be outgoing, nice and funny towards everyone =)

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yeah that's true. I'm like that. Before I was timid like 99% of the visitors on this board (that's how I got here ). Only last night I was standing in line waiting for my turn in theatre. Everybody is packed against eachother and nobody talks to eachother. Me and a friend were being funny and having fun as we always try to, got noticed by girls behind us and I involved them in our conversation, and ended up having drinks after the movie with 4 brand new numbers We're just 'friends' though, unless one of my friends digs one of the chiqs. I didn't, so asking the numbers was just something polite to do

Yepp... I had an exam this week... I walked into the gymhall where it was, like 150 people were seated so I walked upto a couple of mates of mine already seated and I was smiling and **** and they were dirt nervous. I was like " nothing to be nervous bout boys" and they were "Ye but your always cheerfull =)" and I started dancing some and singing FREEE SOOOOON etc hehehe

LOl,that´s the curse of beauty. That sh1t used to happen to me all the time . People tend to give you extra attention when it´s not needed and you get hated on by guys all the time when you don´t even know them.

Originally posted by Kineti[C]harm
I've noticed some happenings like getting more than I ordered at McDonalds etc Like when we went there and 8 of us ordered the same thing and I got a larger coke etc...

Or I've been in queues at counters and I've been picked before people infront of me etc...


=)

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Word. I got free fast food and pizzza´s too .What ´s up with that? Why don´t they just stick their number on the receipt or something?? you´re gonna get fired over a guy??

The worst is when you step into a classroom or a place where a lot of guys are trying get their Dj on. I HATE THAT THE VERY SECOND YOU STEP IN THERE ARE A BUNCH OF GIRLS JUST STARING YOU DOWN AND A BUNCH OF NERDS TRYING TO SCREWFACE YOU.AAARRGGHH I HATE THAT:

Hahaha ye I noticed that at a party once... There were like 10 girls sitting and discussing and my friend and I walked into the room, he walked inn like 3 metres infront of me then I walked inn and all the chattering stopped and they all looked at me That was so fun. I didn't even look at them, just walked arrogantly to the fridge and put in my beers

Acting invisible is just an excuse for lack of confidence...

People who go around trying not to get attention when they really want that have some deeper issues that need to be resolved. They dont feel adequate because they dont meet society's standards so they avoid being let down by acting introverted thus avoiding confronting what they fear. This is their method of escapism...that and playing video games all day in their parents basement

So for those who feel like youre hiding from social situations, do not! Its perpetual and will keep adding momentum to the lack of socializing. If you avoid social interactions or think that theyre avoiding you, youll keep doing it because you dont want to be let down by something you really want. This is an interesting mechanism

Fixing the problem will seem hard but only because it will go against instinct. Instead of avoiding it, confront it. Remember, socializing leads to even more of it. Just be confident and keep in mind that status is only relative

Yeah .Ok.Good . I see your point doggie. That's cool. But what we are stating is that it gets ANNOYING AFTER A WHILE.How would you like it??

What we are trying to say is exactly that. Is that people never seem to understand that all that attention can be SOOO frustating after a while.

What you are talking about is social anxiety. The people that faint in crowded elevators or people that go out of their way to avoid speaking and making eye contact with others.

What we are talking about is people developing anti-social qualities because all the attention their physical traits get them.For example let's get some extra tall people up in here or obese women they will tell you the same damn thing .It's not a complex .....it's an inconvenience.

My problem isn't exactly social anxiety. I certainly do not act invisible. It's that people's reaction to me before I even open my mouth too often ranges from icy indifference to blatant disdain. It's rare to encounter people who display genuine warmth upon the first meeting. In answer to an earlier reply, I do not neglect my personal hygiene nor do I dress in raggedy clothing.

Walk,
Relax....Whats going on is a good thing. Attraction towards others is natural instinct. Its a natural instinct for attractive girls to like attractive men, and vice versa. Its a fact of life and everyone here needs to deal with it. Thats hundreds of thousands of years of evolution going on there that no amount of DJ tricks and tactics is gonna change. From an evolutionary standpoint, its a good thing.

Now, lazy,snobby, spoiled rotten american girls thinking there schit doesn't stink is a whole nother bag of worms.

I am amazed the reaction when I do not wear my glasses... women smiling, talking, etc. Never get that with my glasses!

My last few GFs have also commented that I look much better without glasses.

It is amazing the shallowness... I won't ever go out or into a club with glasses. Luckily my eyes are not very bad. (I cannot stand contacts)

Glasses are good birth contol devices I guess (At least in my case)

Dietzcoi

dude - y would you care how u r percieved by others who u state r shallow and put up barriers --- what does this have to do with your self-worth? it is only an issue if you make it one - people owe u nothing and dont expect much from others in a selfish and artificial society molded by wh@res and fags through magazines, tv, rado and other mass controlled media - these false peolpe of no morals are trying to set the standard of beauty and the foolish masses givie them an audience and adhere to their misguided advice and opinions

look at hollywood - in my opinion most of them are not that good looking and r truly ugly when it comes to being a person - and damn near grotesque when you look at their values and drug-induced actions and wh@rish persona -- many wh@res in our society emulate the giga-Wh@res they see on tv and movies and the men they portray as the model-man is actually a feminie high cheekbone gel in the hair male chump or homosexual - take it as a compliment that you are not to be viewed as "popular" based on this criteria -

if u do become popular u probably stooped to the level of becoming effeminate and extroverted to please and placate the dictates of these masculine wh@res

i take it u r white -- can u imagine the rejection and disdain a black man feels daily in this falsely defined world of beauty and popularity based on the criteria set by the pale emaciated masculine wh@re and effiminate male ----- and u say woe is me???

if u look at this definition of beauty and popularity - white people have just excluded 92% of the population of the earth - 60 minutes last week talked about this relating to the models used in advertising by Ambercrombie and Fitch clothing line and employees were told to only hire people that fit white people's definition of beauty -- u got it -- white emaciated masculine Wh@res and pale faced effeminate gel-haired males ---

this is already well known by non-whites who face discrimination hourly but rarely is it shown and exposed on TV - of course white people always lie and say this is not so -- but the reality of their actions that define truth always wins over the vibrating sounds that their vocal chords make!

watchmewalk - real men dont let others define their reality and definitely do not need others to acknowledge their existence - especially by those with no morals accompanied by an inferior mindset.

you must have a positive attitude about who you are (i.e. personality) and your looks and project this attitude through an ******d confidence that is revealed via your behavior and actions and not concern yourself with false people who make false impressions and have false weak ideologies!

y cant i use the word "******d" - ******d@ without it being cesored? "o.u.t.w.a.r.d."

Most people are scared of me...They think Im gonna rob them or beat them or something....lol

can u imagine the rejection and disdain a black man feels daily in this falsely defined world of beauty and popularity based on the criteria set by the pale emaciated masculine wh@re and effiminate male

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Yeah, Ive felt that way since the beginning...Most of the girls here go for that type of dude, and Im farrrrrrrr from that, so that cuts my chances with alot of girls...I could switch up, but thats bullsh1t...

Originally posted by dietzcoi
I am amazed the reaction when I do not wear my glasses... women smiling, talking, etc. Never get that with my glasses!

My last few GFs have also commented that I look much better without glasses.

It is amazing the shallowness... I won't ever go out or into a club with glasses. Luckily my eyes are not very bad. (I cannot stand contacts)

Glasses are good birth contol devices I guess (At least in my case)

Dietzcoi

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That's because generally glasses is not attractive and glasses also show a generic disformity (bad vision).... I know some people will probably jump on the "DON'T CARE WHAT OTEHRS THINK" bandwagon but I suggest never wearing glasses in public (EVER).... Get lenses.

Actually alot of girls have a thing for black males, it's just not out in the open...

Originally posted by Kineti[C]harm
Actually alot of girls have a thing for black males, it's just not out in the open...

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True, but its odd though...Some of them dont look at you as a person, they just see you as a novelty, like most of the girls here...Im just trying to get a regular girl and do whatever, not get shunned on one end and on the other end get treated like a human dildo...

That's your cue you see =)) That's how I've gotten to know alot of girls. Now I'm white but I'm a real playertype etc... So most girls just see me as a good lay and dirtbag and not a LTR type of guy. But most girls after spending a night are turned 180 degrees because my personality when they get close is different than they expect so they get attached. This is your cue, use your sexuality to manipulate them (Subconsiously by being whom you are)...