I think DJ techniques are so important for the following reason:

There is so much competition out there for the hot women. I really think all these hot girls get so much attention. If you don't do something to stand out, how can you expect to land them.

I also have to admit all this competition bothers me. I hate having to compete.

It was funny tonight, it was one of those dating shows on ABC. I never watch it, and only caught a very short clip so I couldn't tell you which it was. But a girl said "I don't compete for guys"

I almost feel the same way, like I don't want to compete for girls, but in essence we all have to!

Is there any specific thing you do to overcome these negative feelings about all the competition. I think it is so easy to just say hey I'll forget about that girl, because she's already got so many guys hitting on her!

Here are a few things I've thought that might help

1) Picture all the guys competing for her as hopeless AFC's. While this is probably not true (they can't all be AFCS and she is bound to have some interest in at least a few) , it MIGHT make you feel better about your chances.

2) Realize that most guys won't take ACTION in what they consider non-pickup type environments. Utilize this to your advantage. Basically most guys won't talk as much to girls outside of the bar, gym or typical pickup scene.

What tips do you have?

Anyone have any ideas on this?

I didn't go to a chick just because other guys are there (read:c*ckblock) and some chicks notice this and wonder... "why isn't he following the herd?" Competing is stupid, most of the time I try and catch her alone and show how you are unique and confident.I used to write off chicks because other guys were putting more time and effort into it than me. However this doesn't work for most chicks The two phrases I remember when there is 2-4 guys around my "target" girl is:

-The only thing that comes to a dreaming man is sleep: Get up off your azz and approach
-Anything worth getting has to be worked for: Even if she has interest in you, the other guys are making an effort, we as males, are bound with the duty of approaching (Hey it's an even exchange, they get childbirth )


Some other thoughts that run through my mind are
-Maybe it is time to bless her with my presence and save her from those chumps
-When I come into the group, I'll play off the guys, diffusing the c*ckblocks and then work my way to her....WHEN I WANT, so she doesn't think she's on a pedastel

A couple of things:

1) As a guy, we tend to assume that chicks are always constantly bombarded with guys. The truth is...it's not as much as you think. A lot of guys will go for her number, but not as much as you think. Even fewer make any moves after that. So it's never as much competition as you see. When you see a chick walking with 2-3 other guys, you tend to automatically assume those guys are really mackin' it to her. But usually they aren't. Hot girls have tons of guy "friends"...but not as many guys trying to get with her. And out of the guys that DO make a real attempt at getting with her, most of them make relatively pathetic attempts.

2) When you learn and fully understand that happiness doesn't come from having chicks; that you are the only one that can make you happy; that, as such, chicks aren't important to you, and you have the mindset, "If I get chicks interested, cool. If I don't, whatever, I'm still happy"....then competition doesn't apply to you in the same way. You'll wind up having the chicks compete for *you*. Which is the point of DJ-ism.

From having known and dated really hot chicks, I can tell you a lot of them are less happy with their 'love-lives' than uglier women, and even most guys. They get a lot of attention, but they soon tire of that and wish more quality guys would stop obsessing with their looks and see her as a human being, not some object on a pedestal.

So...what differentiates you from the other guys? The two things I listed above: the take-it-or-leave-it mindset and the ability to take action quickly. That's it.

-E-Z

Thanks for the replies guys.

I like both recommendations

First to have it run through your mind that those guys are doing well and won't complete the job

Second, of course, no chick can make you happy. You have to make yourself happy.

This is the kind of inner game talk I need to hear from time to time.

I have another problem right now with my gf. I found her attractive, but now it is like every new girl I see has someone different that I want and can't get from her. Probably doesn't help that my gf put on alot of weight. Blah, but that's for another thread.

You can handle it! =)

Competition is cool, but with chick it tends to be the wrong way. Just stand for yourself. Go get what you want. That people love it or not, do not act upon other people judgement. Act for yourself! Get what you want!

I think gf/chick/whatever are like any relation (try to kill me if you do not like it, I can handle it!) and it is normal there is thing you will like and dislike of your girl and other thing of any other girl, that is why the ideal is to have multiple relation, that is to be guy friend, girl friend, **** friend, LTR, etc. whetever. Mix them... we do not like it (especially if we are part of that with a chick) but it is the ideal, trust me. I just wish we can all handle it easily

And **** the weight... enjoy her for her. Do not feel bad if you are afraid that other see your chick is fat, who give a flying ****. Chance are it is something else, chance are she gets fat for some reason, etc. But maybe that is for another thread, haw.

There's nothing wrong with standing out but I think you can do that without playing games or using techniques. Try, instead to see talking to a girl for what it is. Just talking to a girl. The reason that AFCs AND DJ's resort to using tactics is because they think they need them. That's right, AFCs are not better or worse than DJs, their tactics just differ.

Try walking up and having a normal conversation as if you're talking to a friend. You'll notice that even LESS guys do that, than play stupid games.

You got a point.

I found out that the laps of time I am more attracting girl is when I am having lotsa fun in my life and talk to a lot of people

Try this, at any store, begin to make pseudo-friendship, same at sport center, same at school, same at work... make your talking flow and make it be fun time, introduce story, invent inside, do it WITH EVERYBODY, old man, young girl, etc.

You will find out after that you can do it with anyone, etc.

That is a tips that often come back, but it is true, it is like building confidence and acquiring experience... but it can be lose "somehow" (if you stay in your house 6 months without even go out once, etc. )

Originally posted by Microphone Fiend
Competing is stupid, most of the time I try and catch her alone and show how you are unique and confident.


I used to write off chicks because other guys were putting more time and effort into it than me. However this doesn't work for most chicks.

Click to expand...

I need some clarification here, for my own understanding. You seem to be contradicting yourself here, dont' you think?

You seem to espouse letting the chick and game come to you by not caring, and then at the same time you say that a little competition between males is necessary.


So tell me - coz I gotsta know. Are you just ineloquent, or are you having a bad typing-day?

I think everything is so timing based.

You may see a girl you really want to talk to, but she is surrounded, either by a boyfriend, or a bunch of AFCs, of DJ's.

So sometimes I think like a point guard of a basketball team, look around quickly and find the open girl to talk to. There is always some girls that are available. If you are extremely lucky and she is alone, approach with caution: she may be waiting for a guy or a girlfriend, but talk to her like a friend, either way you won't lose. If she was waiting for a guy she won't be jealous, if she is by herself, the rapport will grow because you aren't throwing yourself at her like most guys. You also are taking action unlike some guys that won't even talk to her (this is actually the response of most guys). In fact as a breakdown.

Guys response to a hot girl (If I had to guess)

>50% don't approach

30% approach and come on way too strong or aren't desirable

20% may do OK, and it depends on the girls mood or the guys looks on whether he pulls it off.

Blitz,

I used to just talk to girls in a laid back attitude, wasnt looking to hook up, and wasnt resorting to any tricks as you say

where did that land me? while I found it easier to approach women and talk to them platonically, I was mostly put in that "he is a GREAT guy to talk to!" category and never got anywhere with them.

I find if you are using this approach, it is best to turn up the heat , so to speak, and become sexual with them while you are their "buddy"

One topic I dont see discussed here too much is appealing to a womens sense of sexuality. Because I have truly found out to win any women over, you must immediately appeal to the their most receptive organ (their sexual organ)

All this talk about c/f, neg hits, etc has its place and time, but if you arent turning her on, you arent getting anywhere.

Originally posted by jakethasnake
I need some clarification here, for my own understanding. You seem to be contradicting yourself here, dont' you think?

You seem to espouse letting the chick and game come to you by not caring, and then at the same time you say that a little competition between males is necessary.


So tell me - coz I gotsta know. Are you just ineloquent, or are you having a bad typing-day?

Click to expand...

A little bit of column A... a lil bit of column B

Just me venting on my situation I guess. Competition helps your cause by out-alpha-ing the others. As for the "letting the chick and game come to you", I realize now that most chicks just want take the initiative no matter how strong their feelings (check out the new Alicia Keys video)I wanna live by "act instead of react"