I have joined this forum two days ago so i m new here.My problem on which i want advice from all u senior DJs is that i have recently joined college.I m not good at making friends. All the good chicks over there hang out in groups with older boys much older than me.They dont talk to anyone else except the people who r in that group. I m really finding difficult to make older guys to like me so i could hang out with them.
How should i accomplish my goals.

Any tips on this one.

Don't try to "make them" like you. That's your problem. Strangely enough I've no trouble with making friends, but still have trouble getting g/f's. But antway, talk to them, find common intrest (hobbies, music, etc). Just have fun, fun people are fun to be with, so people want to hang out with you.

The nice guy act is great for getting friends. Watch out for the users.

Wear a cape, like Frank Costanza's lawyer. It's a hot new trend.

I HAVE NO EYE FOR FASHION!?!?!?!

Sounds like a perfect opportunity for you to learn to be more outgoing by creating a clique of your own. I'm sure that there are other guys on campus that could benefit from being in a comfortable peer group and pick up some positive qualities from one another.

Girls do like older men. Even if you get in the gang, it is not sure that these girls will like you. Almost every boy has faced this stage in life. If you get older, younger girls will chase you and ignore those boys of their own age.

Spend your time on you! Develop yourself, do things you like. Strange enough, if you do not care about people and do the things you love, people will come to you. But it takes a reset of your mind to do this.

Stewartlittle

Cliques are given far too much importance, imo. I have never been part of any clique and have never had any problems making friends from various 'cliques'. I just don't see people in that way. I am aware others do, which is probably because there are certain people they either

A: can't make friends with but want to

B: don't want to make friends with (usually a case of wanting to suck up to A).

I hang out with perfect geeks, slick boys and hip hoppers alike quite irrespective of age (one of my best friends is 16, another 25) and it doesn't make anymore difference to me than it does to them. If you don't acknowledge the reality of cliques, then it doesn't exist. that simple.

Originally posted by stewartlittle
Spend your time on you! Develop yourself, do things you like. Strange enough, if you do not care about people and do the things you love, people will come to you. But it takes a reset of your mind to do this.

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Quite true. If your develop your mind to become self-sufficient as far as happiness goes, then that will make a world of difference as far as socialising goes, because you are not actually doing for the sake of needing (wanting something from them) but actually contributing. Those who have their own home full stocked can freely give out to others and be appriecated. those who don't, will be always be sneaking around other's houses trying to grab something and it is rarely appreciated. Hard truth for those who don't have a well stocked home.

Work on your own personal qualities for yourself. Needless to say, apart from improving social skills, it will also vastly improve the general quality of your life.

Originally posted by B9
Cliques are given far too much importance, imo. I have never been part of any clique and have never had any problems making friends from various 'cliques'.

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Hmmm, the members of this site is a clique. We expound the virtues of being a DJ and denounce the ways of the AFC. RAFCs read our posts and follow our instructions in hopes of becoming one of us.

We support and counsel one another, we have each told someone on the board to forgo their feelings toward a woman that is taking advantage of them no matter how deep their feelings run. And in the end come share our accomplishments and success that we have had over the fairer sex.

If this isn't a clique, I don't know what is...

Originally posted by Blaaaaat
Don't try to "make them" like you. That's your problem. Strangely enough I've no trouble with making friends, but still have trouble getting g/f's. But antway, talk to them, find common intrest (hobbies, music, etc). Just have fun, fun people are fun to be with, so people want to hang out with you.

The nice guy act is great for getting friends. Watch out for the users.

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I got a friend in the same situation.We always hang out because, in a non sexual way(and because Im not a fag), we are like the Ying and the Yang.Let me explain.

Hes really good at making new friends.As far as I know, noone in our college doesnt know him.Hes not popular in the way popular could relate to your definition of the word.He goes to clubs and shakes eevryone`s hands and they all know him.On the other hand,he cant seem to get a girl because he cant stay focused.Thats still real in most area of his life.He has problems in programmation classes and in.....(well every classes).I saw him ask the teachers questions during every classes.Its just that he loses his focus and concentration every 2 minutes and do something else(like convo,jokes...).

As for myself, I dont really like to socialize.Its not because I am shy or cant keep up a good convo, its just that I find most people around me are retarded.I am 18 year old and I find it easier for me to pick up 25-30 y old chicks because they are more mature and enjoyable.You can also be way more up front with what you want in a relationship and get more"Ya, thats good you know what you want" vibes instead of "ya wathever" or "Pig!" vibes.I might not have a lot of convos, unlike my friend but I can go beyond his limits when I feel like the broad is worth it.

Originally posted by MrBond007
Its just that he loses his focus and concentration every 2 minutes and do something else(like convo,jokes...).

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Im like that a lot in real life, i dont like to think reality too much as of is and on top of that, im more of a asserative person that like to take the eazy way out.....

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Hmmm, the members of this site is a clique. We expound the virtues of being a DJ and denounce the ways of the AFC. RAFCs read our posts and follow our instructions in hopes of becoming one of us.

We support and counsel one another, we have each told someone on the board to forgo their feelings toward a woman that is taking advantage of them no matter how deep their feelings run. And in the end come share our accomplishments and success that we have had over the fairer sex.

If this isn't a clique, I don't know what is...

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A clique I would usually define as being somewhat exclusive. Don't see this place as neccesarily being that.

Cliques are your worst enemy. Dont cling to a circle of friends. Learn to befriend everyone. I belive it was a certain Mr. Fingers who did a great post on Social Phobias...where is that link....


ahh here it is

http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=37710

Scroll down to the table of contents, youll find it there. I´d give my own advice here, but homeboy says it all alot better than I could

Originally posted by B9
A clique I would usually define as being somewhat exclusive. Don't see this place as neccesarily being that.

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I agree in that only certain types of people join this site, DJ's and RAFCs. I don't see a bunch of AFCs hanging around here for long without becoming a RAFC. I'm sure there are a lot of people who left the site feeling that being a "nice guy" is the best way to pick up women.