Hello all

I write after another night out, and another unsuccesfull one also. I just don;t know what to do - i can never get it off with a girl. Now i hear you all cry - 'Ah, he is scared of rejection' but i must pause you and say that actually the opposite is true - i am scared of acceptance, however, i had a GF for over two yrs and am not a Virgin but i lack experiance in a competitive enviroment.

I think that there is a gap in my youth which is the problem becuase up to 16, i had health problems and was too busy just getting through the days to look at girls and then i got with my GF and now a yr later my balls are so big, i think they are going to fall off

Now the natural answer to all this is i need to go up to girls and get some experiance and it will be all ok and i actually do think that thats the case but the problem is that even though i am good looking, i don;t feel sexy and don;t act sexy - i can;t really grip what it is and thats when i fall down - the sam ewith flirting.

So basically, i am screwed but i know that i could do well and i all i need is a little self belief - i just despair over where i am going to find it

Thanks for reading

Hey mate

I still can't approach. I've been lucky since I started trying to meet women (3 years ago) in that a lot of the time I've met them through friends or by pure luck. I'm sitll a virgin I have had 3 GFs but all of them STR. I've dated 4 girls this year, but I still don't have that much confidence. It's difficult I know.

What happend was that me and 4 of my friends were all **** at approaching women, and we were all inexperienced. So we used to go clubbing together, I had low self-confidence like you do. So I never used to approach girls at clubs, ice-skating or anywhere else. Maybe once every few months. I was just too scared to approach.

Now two of my friends have hooked up with GFs and been going out with them for 6 or 7 months. The other dude works his whole life now, so all my friends have ditched me so it's even harder to meet women. The first of us to be successful was the least attractive (actually many girls have told me they think he is UGLY). Why did he succeed? Cos' he kept trying, and kept getting rejected and he actually landed himself a fauilry attractive women (about 6.5).

Which ain't too bad considering some women think he's UGLY. And here I am, single, with no GF and only a little experience under my belt. I can't go out so much now cos' my friends are with my GFs, and I completely regeret not approaching when things were easier.

It doesn't matter how attractive you are. Really. Just make sure you look your best. Go to gym, catch a sun tan, buy clothes that you think make you more attractive, wear nice cologne. All these things boost your confidence. Start using affirmations every day. I used these early in my DJ career and they helped me do a few pickups.

Santos

Dude it sounds like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself.

Really man this DJ thing ain't sh*t to it.

The only thing stopping you is the mental stuff you put on it that makes it seem hard (I know what bull**** that sounds like but it's not, I've been totally in those AFC shoes before).

So much of this DJing game is limits you subconsciously put on yourself it's like the f***en Matrix man.What you're really capable of will amaze you.

You know what worked for me and you know I'd reccomend it.
If you need someone to keep you honest doing that or to check up on your progress while you go through then PM me.

You already have the desire to improve your DJing now all you need to do is make a plan to improve your skills, don't choose to lead a mediocre life.

Hi Borgia,

i can understand you. Perhaps some people have just no chance to get it. I have given it up.....