So, do you think the Tao of Steve thing works in real life, or do you think it's a bunch of BS?

Basically for those who DON'T know:

Be desireless
Be Exellent
Be gone

Do you think it would be successful for nerdy guys or low self esteemed guys?

I stopped flirting. It was a waste of time, since I'd either get shot down right away, or I'd get a stupid look from a girl. So though I love women, and desire them, I've begun acting like I am desireless.

Unfortunately there is a tiny bit of AFCness in me still. So being desireless but nice gets me nowhere. (Not that I always act afc...)

So what is "being excellent" exactly? How do you show excellence without bragging?

I' try to lead a full life. I try to have a full life WITHOUT WOMEN. I do things that women hate or think is lame, just because I honestly enjoy it. I don't need a woman to enjoy these things. But I do need to feel that attraction from women though, since I've got nothing as far as women go. But the problem lies where the women think that what I do is worthless. (I gotta admit that that gets to me sometimes.) If a woman thinks you're worthless, even if you're exellent, where does that put you? IT puts you in the LJBF zone.

Then what?

Am I missing something with the whole "desireless" idea? Or is it a bad idea altogether?

I'm excellent, but the women don't seem to ever recognize that excellence.

Be careful. You're falling into the same trap I'm in...you don't want to be "desireless." You just need to be in control of your desires. If you don't desire women, then you're not going to get any. A strong sex drive is actually a VERY good thing. The key is that YOU have to be in CONTROL of it, not the other way around.

control your sex drive???

mine is like a runaway train!!!

how to you control a runaway train or tie a rope around a tornado?

I would really like to know.

expensive

Originally posted by squirrels
Be careful. You're falling into the same trap I'm in...you don't want to be "desireless." You just need to be in control of your desires. If you don't desire women, then you're not going to get any. A strong sex drive is actually a VERY good thing. The key is that YOU have to be in CONTROL of it, not the other way around.

Click to expand...

Well, there's that other part of the issue. I've tried the flirting. Nothing. I've tried the desire stuff, showing attraction, and I get shot down and rejected in about a minute.

So... What then? Showing desire or interest when no one desires or is interested in you, becomes difficult after a while.

The fact is that, because other people haven't validated your desires, you assume that they're somehow wrong, or that you're not desirable.

You can't look to other people to validate your worthiness. I've been in the same situation, where I used to go to bars and clubs and when women didn't respond like I wanted them to, I would feel worse about myself. Eventually, it got to the point where I was trying to pick women up just to prove my sexual worthiness to myself.

The idea behind "eliminating desire" in Tao of Steve isn't that you eliminate your desires, you just don't NEED to gratify them, meaning that you aren't willing to do anything, including supplicating to women and kissing their asses, just to get laid. You still have desires. They just don't control you. They can't force you to take actions that you know are the wrong things to do...actions that make you seem "less than excellent" in the woman's eyes.

It's a balance of three things...that's why it's called a "Tao." It's not a step-by-step instruction sequence for pulling women. It's a circle. It's a way of life.

There's an article somewhere in the DJ Bible which talks about the Tao of Steve...might've been a Pook article, but I dont' remember.

There is some decent material in Tao of Steve, just gives you another perspective. Good rent

Steve was based on a real person if you look in the credits, so if you need to know if it's valid stuff, it is.

Being desireless is important to stop your desires working against you. But once you have complete control of them, you can redivert them into your sexuality and become, as they say, "SEXY". It's the first step.