Hey guys,
I was having a debate with someone in another forum regarding whether or not you could hook up with a girl without having a conversation. This has happened to me many times, and it all comes down to attitude. Here is the post and the tips. Enjoy!
I noticed that you recently posted a thread talking about how one of your sticking points is that you don't feel comfortable in a bar.
"Ok...here's my problem. I get really self-conscious when I'm in a large public gather eg. a bar... "
My point is, that unless you feel totally comfortable with yourself and your surroundings, it is IMPOSSIBLE to ever have something like dvs is talking about happen to you. I can see why you don't believe his report.
On the other hand, when you are feeling like THE MAN and you are completely comfortable with everything and everyone around you, this type of thing happens quite often. Not every night, and you don't always get laid, but I'd say at least once a month I will be hanging out at a bar and out of the blue end up hooking up with some random girl. Now, I'm a fairly good looking guy, but when this happens, my better looking friends usually can't believe it! It all comes down to attitude. Here are a few things I do to create and install this attitude in myself, and a few ways to project it.
The first thing I do when I walk into a bar, club, or anywhere, is stop, put my arms out, and say, either outloud. or to myself, "MY HOUSE!". Why? Because it is! If I'm inside a bar, I own the ****in place, and everyone is damn happy that I'm there!
This drives a couple of my friends crazy, because I walk into their apartments and say MY HOUSE! and they get territorial. Whatever.
Anyways, another helpful thing to do is something I got from one of my best friends, and one of the best PUA's I know. He told me that when you walk around the club, have the attitude towards everybody in there that YOU belong there, and THEY don't. They are your guests. Don't be afraid to walk up to a big group of people and say, "Hey...you guys all having a good time tonight? Right on."
The most important thing you have to do to project this vibe is to focus on your body language and your facial expressions. Dan Scorpio had an awesome post on body language a few years ago, and it has stuck with me ever since. (Does anyone have it?)
You want to be like the bad guy in the movies. When you are standing somewhere, keep your head high and your arms either crossed, or hands in pockets with thumbs pointing towards your crotch. Or hands in back pockets to show off your chest. Keep your feet slightly more than shoulder with apart, or if you are leaning on something, put one foot on the wall behind you. Don't be afraid to lean up against a bar, and when you do, drape your whole arm (or arms) across it. Take up lots of space, because after all, this is YOUR HOUSE!
I've had success with both the evil grin and the so-called "underlook". Find a picture of Pierce Brosnan or Marlon Brando to see what I mean. Lately I've preferred the underlook, because my style is a little dryer than it used to be. Don't be afraid to make eye contact with a girl, and when you do, squint your eyes a little bit and give her a little smile, and possibly an eyebrow raise if she holds eye contact with you.
Anyways ****, these guys aren't BSing you when they say the Double Your Dating Advanced Series is the best place to learn all of this stuff, and the attitudes that come with it.
I was having a debate with someone in another forum regarding whether or not you could hook up with a girl without having a conversation. This has happened to me many times, and it all comes down to attitude. Here is the post and the tips. Enjoy!
I noticed that you recently posted a thread talking about how one of your sticking points is that you don't feel comfortable in a bar.
"Ok...here's my problem. I get really self-conscious when I'm in a large public gather eg. a bar... "
My point is, that unless you feel totally comfortable with yourself and your surroundings, it is IMPOSSIBLE to ever have something like dvs is talking about happen to you. I can see why you don't believe his report.
On the other hand, when you are feeling like THE MAN and you are completely comfortable with everything and everyone around you, this type of thing happens quite often. Not every night, and you don't always get laid, but I'd say at least once a month I will be hanging out at a bar and out of the blue end up hooking up with some random girl. Now, I'm a fairly good looking guy, but when this happens, my better looking friends usually can't believe it! It all comes down to attitude. Here are a few things I do to create and install this attitude in myself, and a few ways to project it.
The first thing I do when I walk into a bar, club, or anywhere, is stop, put my arms out, and say, either outloud. or to myself, "MY HOUSE!". Why? Because it is! If I'm inside a bar, I own the ****in place, and everyone is damn happy that I'm there!
This drives a couple of my friends crazy, because I walk into their apartments and say MY HOUSE! and they get territorial. Whatever.
Anyways, another helpful thing to do is something I got from one of my best friends, and one of the best PUA's I know. He told me that when you walk around the club, have the attitude towards everybody in there that YOU belong there, and THEY don't. They are your guests. Don't be afraid to walk up to a big group of people and say, "Hey...you guys all having a good time tonight? Right on."
The most important thing you have to do to project this vibe is to focus on your body language and your facial expressions. Dan Scorpio had an awesome post on body language a few years ago, and it has stuck with me ever since. (Does anyone have it?)
You want to be like the bad guy in the movies. When you are standing somewhere, keep your head high and your arms either crossed, or hands in pockets with thumbs pointing towards your crotch. Or hands in back pockets to show off your chest. Keep your feet slightly more than shoulder with apart, or if you are leaning on something, put one foot on the wall behind you. Don't be afraid to lean up against a bar, and when you do, drape your whole arm (or arms) across it. Take up lots of space, because after all, this is YOUR HOUSE!
I've had success with both the evil grin and the so-called "underlook". Find a picture of Pierce Brosnan or Marlon Brando to see what I mean. Lately I've preferred the underlook, because my style is a little dryer than it used to be. Don't be afraid to make eye contact with a girl, and when you do, squint your eyes a little bit and give her a little smile, and possibly an eyebrow raise if she holds eye contact with you.
Anyways ****, these guys aren't BSing you when they say the Double Your Dating Advanced Series is the best place to learn all of this stuff, and the attitudes that come with it.