I couple of months ago i met this girl at a party, she didnt seem to show that much interest to be honest ( maybe she was but i wasnt picking up the signs, has happnened before), but a couple of day later she had asked for my no from a friend and gave me a text. We went out on a couple of dates but after that it was clear she had lost any interest she might have had, becasue we never kissed. (we went to see a film, i put my arm round her and she was rigid, didnt move an inch closer to me or anything so i removed my arm assuming she didnt want it there, maybe i was wrong, i dont know)
Fine.

But yesterday after weeks of no contact she rings me up and asks me to go with her/be her date (i cant remember the exact words) to her school ball. However she actually told me she had another date but he pulled out.

To me this is sounding like she doesnt really like me at all but is just desperate not to go alone and is using me, i was just looking for some opinions.

she actually told me she had another date but he pulled out.

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And you didn't quietly put the phone down on her at this point?

Can you imagine the flak you'd cop if you asked a girl out, then told her you'd already asked someone else but they'd pulled out?

I hope I don't need to say don't go to the ball with her, have some self-respect.

bp1974

But yesterday after weeks of no contact she rings me up and asks me to go with her/be her date (i cant remember the exact words) to her school ball. However she actually told me she had another date but he pulled out.

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So, you're the last resort?


Fvck her, man.

You're busy and can't make it that night. That guy probably picked up on her vibes, too. That's why he bailed.

The Bad Ass Canadian

she's treating you like crap. Drop her like a hot potato and save your manly dignity!

Agree to go with her then don't show up.

What's in it for you? Seriously. Is this ball a place you'd want to go if she hadn't asked you? Is she guaranteeing you sex afterwards? If the answer to those questions is no, then I better not see you at that ball. I'll be waiting in back with a crowbar.

One of the worst mistakes we all made in our "nice guy" days was doing nice things and sacrificing ourselves for girls in the hopes that they might realize we're wonderful and fall in love with us. Never happens. They just put you in the place of a lackey while they pursue exciting guys.

Now this girl who forgot about your existence wants you to jump at her call and be her space-filling dummy because the last guy was smart enough to get out. Did she offer to pay for your expenses? If I were you, I'd be insulted that when she thought of a guy who she could just call out of nowhere and have him take the place of a guy she thinks is more desirable with nothing in return, your name came to mind.

So did you answer yet?

I agree with the others, but I wouldn't say "Yes" then not show up. Have some class. Just tell her "I can't go, I have other plans".

agreed. I had these thoughts going round my mind, i think i just wanted to hear it from someone else. Anyway as it happens i have good plans for that day anyway so i wouldnt even be lying

Using you for what???

Go to the ball..ignore her..and hit on every chick there..you might come out with some new #'s

Yo.... Starman's got it. Use her as some social proof. If other girls see you out with her, maybe they'll be interested. Go, have a great time and use it as some practice. The only thing you have to watch out for is that you don't let her "guilt" you into being a better "date" i.e. You go and start hitting on some other girls and she tells you that your ignoring her and being a bad "date". Don't let her play you that way and do not be the "nice guy". Use this experience to your advantage and HAVE A GREAT TIME. Don't worry about whether this girl likes you, have a good time and don't let her bring you down, otherwise you'll be her chump.

The ethical DJ - gt95ab

Originally posted by LT1
Agree to go with her then don't show up.

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hahaha.. taht would be great... i'd do that if i didn't have a conscience.

She's fickle or more probably, she's bored and using to plug some gaps in her day. You're sort of letting her treat you like a chump because you're interested in her. Get some backbone dude and be assertive! This doesn't mean acting like an a$$ but give her some of her own medicine back - you know what they say: you reap what you sow! just bear in mind that this girl shows low IL and has a questionable attitude so you can't really be that attracted to her can you? Unless your thinking with your c0ck that is, in which case you haven't quite mastered the necessary DJ element of self control