I went out with a HB thursday and she just called me tonight (Sunday). This is after the second date in 2 weeks. They went very well and I would like to go out with her again. But...

When she called tonight she just babbled on and on about her drunken weekend. Dudes were obviously involved and it made me pissed underneath. I told her she was too much drama for me in my life right now, and I felt it hit her like a rejection. It confused her. I don't know if this was the right thing to do but I'll find out later how she responds.

What do you do when you feel that her "testing" is too excessive?

BTW, this is the same girl who farted in my previous thread.

As you two aren't exclusive it doesn't really mean she can't see other guys.

Sure you don't want to hear about it. On the phone you could have cut short by saying you had to go out or some B$, or change topic. You don't have to listen to it.

You say "she babbled on" - you shouldn't speak on the phone for long anyway, the phone is for setting up dates - only her and her girlfriends speak on the phone. You are a busy guy who doesn't have time to chat on the phone. Retain CHALLENGE and MYSTERY.

In answer to your question, don't let her know her tests get to you, or she wins. Be aware of them but don't react. Their aim is to see if she can get under your skin and provoke a reaction. She then knows she has some CONTROL over you.

You're semi-rejection could bring her back chasing you more, chicks hate being rejected, especially hot ones.

What does this have to do with neg-hits?

-PDX

absolutely nothing

WOops, that one was intended for me.


In all seriousnessity, intomyown you may of given this chick a vibe that you're not interested in her and if she has other guys after her... you are history.

If you're into a girl, why hide it? I mean, I wouldn't come onto her out of desperation or make my initial approach too strong... but once you've been out with her you can stop playing games. Man, when I first came to this site I felt that everyone advocated games.

I'm learning they don't always work. I'm changing my mind about games.

Like "Be a mystery..." or "Be a challenge..." those are for guys who can't open their mouth without saying something stupid.

Now, neg-hits work. I have a friend who has 9s and 10s warming up to him all of the time because he's naturally ****y and tries to be nice. But what you said had nothing to do with negging. Do a search. I'd say you sort of put her down and possibly convinced her she needs to move on if she's even into you.

Tough love

DWK

Originally posted by Don-Wan Kenobi
absolutely nothing

WOops, that one was intended for me.

Click to expand...

Haha! Actually, I was thinking it be interesting to hear intomyown articulate what HE thought this had to do with neg hits. But that's okay, because your post was right on.

The problem is that neg hits are a concept that was originally introduced to ASF by Mystery years ago. I don't know at what point it made it to THIS board but when it did it took NOTHING ELSE about Mystery Method with it. This notion of a "neg hit" has been obfuscated to the point where it's real meaning is lost and this board has made it into something completely different. Therefore, we have had guys (including myself before I went to ASF from here) using not only things that are NOT neg hits even in the right context but in situations where the entire concept of negging doesn't even apply.

Unfortunately, the misinterpretations and wrong meanings of the term "neg hit" are so deeply embedded in the culture of this site that no amount of clarification and explanation seems to work to counteract it. In fact, this is probably the fourth time I have written this same post in about 6 months. I give up. LOL!

-PDX