Seriously, this website is giving me so much theory about most things we men care about. But it's since a year that I really started to act, make choices en pursue a lifestyle that I want. Some people think it's selfish, others call me stubborn, and again others just turned their backs on me.
But these days, things are starting to get scary... I'm really about to cross borders, operate in totally strange environments and go where I've never gone before. You can say it's a normal part of life, but the changes I went through last year are dramatic.. as radical as puberty and sometimes I wonder if I'm not going too far.
End of 5,5 years of LTR
In 2010 my 5,5 LTR ended. I found myself quite isolated with my ex, although we had our own small social circle: a combination of her friends and mine. We had some great times together, but I was more and more missing out the fun and joy of life. 5,5 years is a long time.. especially when you start at the age of 20 and break up at the age of 26. I don't regret anything, but I really had strong feelings that I have a lot of catching up to do.
Recovering
So after a period of grief, I started surfing the sosuave site again, and I was ready for the BIG party of life that I was missing for many, many years. And that party started in spring 2011: lots of going out, making new contacts, digging up old friends and making every mistake in the book with women (but learned of it :rockon
.
The popular guys
I got a new job in 2011, where many students work to earn some extra bucks. Apply there was one of the best decisions I could make: I came in contact with one of the most populair groups in town. Young, motivated and non-AFC, between 23 and 26 y/o guys that were living their lives the way I wanted to. As friends they live together, study, work and play sports together, go out together and are surrounded by the most beautiful girls. The fun part for me is that it's a quite open group, so when they found out that I was a cool guy they asked me to join them to go out and visit their places. When I see these youngsters, I really think by myself: 'THESE guys get it. I may be coincidence, or not, but I truly understand their behaviour.'
My old friends
I've been stuck with the same small group of friends since highschool. Some people left, and some new people came in, but it was quite steady. They are AFC, just as I was. Two of them so desperate to get a LTR, that when they got one (last year) they totally changed. At this moment, they act like one happy AFC family in which ho's are clearly before bro's. I hated it at first, but then accepted it and acted towards them like nothing was changed. One thing is for sure: the girlfriends hate me. They see me as a threat, as a demon in their perfect little world they are trying to create around them.
During my recovery phase in which I dramatically expanded my social circle, I sometimes felt I abandoned my old friends but on the other hand I felt they had turned their backs at me. I kept on relativising the situation: "they are all in LTRs and I'm single. Of course we are living different lives, but that shouldn't affect the friendship". But then I heard that they were talking behind my back, and that they clearly didn't understand why I changed so much. Then they started to do (which I don't think it on purpose) exactly the things I don't like to do, and most of the time with the girls too. When I ask them to have a '"Bro Only" night out, nothing happens (except for my 1 closest friend).
Then I realised: we all changed. These guys are my friends, but I MUST move on. No way I'm going back to that ****, no ******* way! And NO way I'm going to settle down, play freaking board games at saturday night with their idiot girlfriends. No.
The Crossroad
I'm feeling kind of lonely right now. But there are some good things ahead of me: I will start a master's degree in the summer, for example. And my way with women is getting better and better.
At the moment, I'm living on my own in a nice appartement. The problem is that I'm alone a lot.. So I started to think what I actually want from life:
- Lots of partying
- Lots of fun
- Lots of contacts
- Lots of women
- Finishing my studies
I realised that the first four are the things I COULD have had if I didn't choose to settle down in my early 20's. So I guess I just want to take what I missed... avenge my AFC years. It feels like puberty, although I'm 27.
Last week one of those populair guys from work told me that they are looking for a new roommate to join the group. I felt like: "hell, why not?" But everyone would think I'm totally crazy if I'd move from my appartement to a house with these guys. But the idea feels great... I wouldn't be lonely, it's a huge boost to my sociale circle, and it's motivating. It would be a big finger to my old friends too... that are disapproving my current lifestyle.
You guys think I'm going too far in this situation?
But these days, things are starting to get scary... I'm really about to cross borders, operate in totally strange environments and go where I've never gone before. You can say it's a normal part of life, but the changes I went through last year are dramatic.. as radical as puberty and sometimes I wonder if I'm not going too far.
End of 5,5 years of LTR
In 2010 my 5,5 LTR ended. I found myself quite isolated with my ex, although we had our own small social circle: a combination of her friends and mine. We had some great times together, but I was more and more missing out the fun and joy of life. 5,5 years is a long time.. especially when you start at the age of 20 and break up at the age of 26. I don't regret anything, but I really had strong feelings that I have a lot of catching up to do.
Recovering
So after a period of grief, I started surfing the sosuave site again, and I was ready for the BIG party of life that I was missing for many, many years. And that party started in spring 2011: lots of going out, making new contacts, digging up old friends and making every mistake in the book with women (but learned of it :rockon
. The popular guys
I got a new job in 2011, where many students work to earn some extra bucks. Apply there was one of the best decisions I could make: I came in contact with one of the most populair groups in town. Young, motivated and non-AFC, between 23 and 26 y/o guys that were living their lives the way I wanted to. As friends they live together, study, work and play sports together, go out together and are surrounded by the most beautiful girls. The fun part for me is that it's a quite open group, so when they found out that I was a cool guy they asked me to join them to go out and visit their places. When I see these youngsters, I really think by myself: 'THESE guys get it. I may be coincidence, or not, but I truly understand their behaviour.'
My old friends
I've been stuck with the same small group of friends since highschool. Some people left, and some new people came in, but it was quite steady. They are AFC, just as I was. Two of them so desperate to get a LTR, that when they got one (last year) they totally changed. At this moment, they act like one happy AFC family in which ho's are clearly before bro's. I hated it at first, but then accepted it and acted towards them like nothing was changed. One thing is for sure: the girlfriends hate me. They see me as a threat, as a demon in their perfect little world they are trying to create around them.
During my recovery phase in which I dramatically expanded my social circle, I sometimes felt I abandoned my old friends but on the other hand I felt they had turned their backs at me. I kept on relativising the situation: "they are all in LTRs and I'm single. Of course we are living different lives, but that shouldn't affect the friendship". But then I heard that they were talking behind my back, and that they clearly didn't understand why I changed so much. Then they started to do (which I don't think it on purpose) exactly the things I don't like to do, and most of the time with the girls too. When I ask them to have a '"Bro Only" night out, nothing happens (except for my 1 closest friend).
Then I realised: we all changed. These guys are my friends, but I MUST move on. No way I'm going back to that ****, no ******* way! And NO way I'm going to settle down, play freaking board games at saturday night with their idiot girlfriends. No.
The Crossroad
I'm feeling kind of lonely right now. But there are some good things ahead of me: I will start a master's degree in the summer, for example. And my way with women is getting better and better.
At the moment, I'm living on my own in a nice appartement. The problem is that I'm alone a lot.. So I started to think what I actually want from life:
- Lots of partying
- Lots of fun
- Lots of contacts
- Lots of women
- Finishing my studies
I realised that the first four are the things I COULD have had if I didn't choose to settle down in my early 20's. So I guess I just want to take what I missed... avenge my AFC years. It feels like puberty, although I'm 27.
Last week one of those populair guys from work told me that they are looking for a new roommate to join the group. I felt like: "hell, why not?" But everyone would think I'm totally crazy if I'd move from my appartement to a house with these guys. But the idea feels great... I wouldn't be lonely, it's a huge boost to my sociale circle, and it's motivating. It would be a big finger to my old friends too... that are disapproving my current lifestyle.
You guys think I'm going too far in this situation?
