Just want your take on this.

When ol' 5string married Mrs.5string, we settled on plain white gold wedding bands. Fine with me, and it was actually her choice. I had not given her an engagement ring. As far as material things are concerned, we pretty much have it all. I asked her if someone were to say something about such a plain band, how would she respond. She simply said, "I'll show them my house" which is very nice by the way.

Anyway, I took her out yesterday to take care of some things, and ended up buying her a beautiful enagement ring, the one she never had. Mrs.5string was thrilled. She even called me this morning and told me how much she loved it and that she didn't need it, could not believe I bought it for her, blah blah.

So do you think I put her on a pedestal? Would you have done this? I suppose to an extent, I did put her on a pedestal, but can you not do that to a degree when you are married? I mean she waits on me constantly, the sex and companionship are great and I still run the show and lead the household.

Hey thanks Danger.

You know, I have always been one that does things when the mood strikes me, and it did yesterday. I could have waited until Xmas but that's not my style. So, I guess I did do it on my own terms. It was much more of a "moment" as she had no idea what was to about to happen.

Priceless.

I don't think doing something like that is putting her on a pedastal at all. Do you feel like it was "transactional" in nature?

Nothing wrong with doing great things for a women out of the blue, but my hard and fast rule is that it should be connected with good behavior on her part, as a means of anchoring.

Sounds like you're trackin' pretty good, my man.

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the issue with "putting women on a pedestal" is not so much doing **** for a woman, it's in the nature that it's done in, i.e doing things in the expectation/hope getting something (a relationship, happiness, sex) in return.

you did not do this, you REWARDED your wife with something she wanted. there is nothing wrong with that.

lol, my wife is spoiled ****less. but she is so because she's a good wife. I like doing nice things for my wife becuase she does nice things for me and provides me with what i want/need and then some. I'm not doing so out of some hope that if i do x or y for her i'm going to get laid or i'm going to keep her happy.

backbreaker said:

the issue with "putting women on a pedestal" is not so much doing **** for a woman, it's in the nature that it's done in, i.e doing things in the expectation/hope getting something (a relationship, happiness, sex) in return.

you did not do this, you REWARDED your wife with something she wanted. there is nothing wrong with that.

lol, my wife is spoiled ****less. but she is so because she's a good wife. I like doing nice things for my wife becuase she does nice things for me and provides me with what i want/need and then some. I'm not doing so out of some hope that if i do x or y for her i'm going to get laid or i'm going to keep her happy.

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That's great! Sounds like you have one fine marriage brother. Mrs.5string is still all giddy about her engagement ring, even this AM. She had said she really didnt care about it until I gave it to her. Then she told me how much it truly meant to her once it was on her finger. She's been showing it off to her GF's. Heck, she deserved it. When I think about it, I have been the one who's had my tight a$$ perched on a pedestal. Love it.