No results

[krd]

Once again, it's the end of the semester and still no girl. I just can't figure out what I'm doing wrong. I'm 23 years old, I've been trying for five or six years, I've been coming to this site for nearly three years and reading the information, but I've still yet to see any results. I've gotten phone numbers, but I've learned quickly that just because a girl gives me her number, it doesn't mean she's interested. I'm all out of ideas. What the hell am I dong wrong? After all, this isn't rocket science. Why is something that seems to come so easy for most everyone else is so hard for me?

[THIAGO BRAZIL]

http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/mad.gif I get mad for you and share your pain, BUT! You must change your mindset. You see, you are on the "I wont get any" mind setting, even if a chick with very high interest level comes to you, you will make things to do it wrong and "what the hell am I doing wrong?" you expect to fail so that will be.
Affirm to yourself that you deserve a good woman in your life and everything will go ok. You already know how the game goes now play it right.

good luck

[crowes22]

Your'e trying too hard. Quit looking for a GF. Let 'her' stumble upon YOU.

Immesrse yourself in your life, and where you are aiming it, forget all the other frills.

[krd]

I know what you are saying, but it's hard to get out of the "I won't get any mindset" if you haven't been getting any in the first place. And keep in mind, I'm not necessarily trying to get any. All I want is for a girl to be interested in me and not see me as just another guy she talks to now and then. I see other guys get frequent hugs from girls and they always seem so happy to be in the guys' presence. I, on the other hand, might as well just be another piece of furniture.

I've tried to adopt the "I don't need a girl" mindset, but how do you make something that matters to you so deeply just stop mattering? I wish I could help how I feel, but I can't. When you've been in such a situation for so long and nothing ever seems to change, no matter what you do, it's hard to start believing "I'm the man." I think I have a lot to offer. I'm handsome, interesting and I believe I deserve a good woman in my life. Why doesn't anybody else feel the same way?

[THIAGO BRAZIL]

I DO FEEL THIS WAY!

IT SUCKS!!!!!!! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/mad.gif this changes take time!
What I am working on is MY LIFE, almost forget that there are girls, date occasionaly a few chicks, just to keep going, and then when you realise there will be girls after you, because you have A LIFE.

Keep going. I know it sucks right now. Look at me, friday night 11pm and no chicks, no dates, no friends to go out. But I am working on ME, loneliness? yes, so emerge as a winner!

[StellarPKT]

Krd,

It seems like you have a self defeating attitude which will most likely fulfil itself every single time you encounter the opposite sex. Its a same that things are the way they are, but there is no getting around it. I believe it was Pook who said, "As you think, so you shall become." The attitude has to come first before you can ever hope to have any success with women.

If a woman senses that you are weak minded, or a non-dominant male, she will not feel an attraction to you. You have to be ultra-confident, Like you KNOW that you are the best thing for this woman. I've been told by a woman that she knew just by the way I walked, talked, and carried myself that she knew I was special and wanted to see what I was all about. A confident air about you is like a magnet.

If you want a woman to be happy in your presence, then the best thing to do would be to make them laugh. Humor is just pure power with women. You make them laugh and they will instantly feel comfortable around you, and will want to come around you more often. There are posts on this website on learning the fine art of humor. Visit David Deangelo's site because he has a lot of good examples as well. Go out and figure out how to be funny if you're not already, read books, listen to tapes...its all about self help here. Usually humor is not always about what you say, but how you say it.

Another way for a woman to be happy in your presence is to make her feel good about herself. This does not mean being her emotional tampon while she vents her problems to you. It just means noticing little things about her that maybe nobody else would. It also means being supportive and listening sometimes, because woman all like a guy that listens. They like to babble a lot anyways so this should be easy. If a woman thinks the world as a toilet, and you make her forget all about that, then she will certainly want to come around you more often.

These are only a couple ways to become more successful with woman. I think one of your problems is your putting too much pressure on yourself. You get your hopes up over this ever elusive "girl" and you let this control your attitude. Let success in other areas of your life dictate your overall attitude. And this will show in the way you carry yourself. Your transformation must occur from the inside out. Change of attitude = Successful encounters with women.

[Chubbs Peterson]

krd,
If you really indeed have all these things going for yourself (looks, personality, etc) don't give up. Some people master this sh1t at different ages. When I was your age I was in the same boat you are in right now. Now things are different. Sometimes people would give me the right advice but it was difficult to ABSORB the advice and figure out how to make it work for me.

Imagine you didn't know how to ride a bike and then someone tells you how. He describes everything involved: the mechanics, the need for balance, picking up speed, etc. Will you be able to get on a bike and ride it?

Of course not.

It takes practice and time. Some of us take longer than others. Stop worrying about getting girlfriend. Just keep practicing the methods that the DJ bible discusses and things will slowly start to change.

[crowes22]

krd, I know what you are saying. Let me ask, answer if you want or ignore it, it's really not my or anyones business, and I respect any decision of yours on answering, really.

Virgin? yes or no? You I mean.


I ask b/c the emphasis I sense is on your question makes me ask.

Not trying to demean here man, but I 'know' my question could clear a bit up for me.

[imc]

Originally posted by Chubbs Peterson:
krd,
If you really indeed have all these things going for yourself (looks, personality, etc) don't give up.
...
Stop worrying about getting girlfriend. Just keep practicing the methods that the DJ bible discusses and things will slowly start to change.
That's the best advice, don't make from girls a survival or death issue, always keep in mind that those guys successful are not
better than you in anything, that means succeeding with women is not rocket science so why r u burning urself, does that help u much? certainly not, that only makes things worser, and the women stuff becomes a vicious circle...I understand your need for a b1tch in ur life, but you need to force urslef a little bit to break the vicious circle...and make women an extra in ur life and a result of your power not a need in itself...like any other field of life...do what you shall do without thinking of the results..that is satisfy yourself first and success will come on its own as a result of your power...so stop being emotional and needy for women and keep practising the DJ rules and let the results come on their own without even thinking of them...take what I told u for granted from my experiences in life...

[Jean Paul]

Try saying to yourself: "It's not my fault, I've just been meeting the wrong girls.". It got the "I won't gey any" mindset out of my head. If you know from yourself that you're a cool guy then it's the girls fault if she can't appreciate you for who you are. Never change yourself for any chick!

[krd]

I do try to concentrate on other areas of my life. I go to school, I've been involved with a few student organization on campus. I am a musician and performer, who recently put together a (temporary) band, and peformed my songs live at one of the dorms. I posted flyers all around campus (with my picture on them) told people I knew about it, including many girls that I talk to, but hardly anyone came. This summer, besides taking a few summer courses at school, I am currently considering getting a summer job and saving up my money so that I can buy a car. But as much as I always try to improve myself for the better, the issue always comes back around to girls, and I start to feel like everything I do doesn't make one bit a difference. It's still just not good enough. I can never get a girl to give a rat's behind about me.

It's gotten to the point now where I'm starting to think that my situation is due mostly to bad luck. Maybe I'm doing nothing wrong, but the opportunties just never come at the right time. I always compare myself to the customer who buys a lottery ticket every week but never wins, apart from the guy who's never bought a ticket before and suddenly decides to on a whim. That guy ends up winning three million bucks, while the the other guy is still struggling to make ends meet. And there's nothing anyone can really do about luck. Either you have it or you don't.

And to answer crowes22's question, yes I am a virgin. I'm 23, hane never been on a real date and never even kissed a girl. Being a virgin doesn't necessarily bother me. I would much rather make the decision to wait until I find that one special person I care about. I know about all the risks pertaining to sex and I'd just as rather avoid all that. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't want a girl to want to sleep with me, kiss me or be attracted to me. If I'm gonna be a virgin, I want to be one by choice, not because I can't get a girl to want to come near me.

[JonnyNice]

Hey there, krd, I'm new to this forum, so please don't be offended if I suggest anything that has been already said, or anything new and exciting that hasn't yet happened.

I don't believe in luck. So get that bad luck thing out of your head first. Do you think that belief supports you? Do you think making images in your mind of never getting the winning ticket helps? Is this a belief you want your friends to have? Or your son someday?

There will be too parts to our strategy: Cognitive and Action. If we do both I know you will learn a lot.

Cognitive: We are going to play a game. For a short period of time we're going to imagine an airhockey goal. You are the goalee. Every time one of these bullsh*t phrases pictures, sounds or feelings comes toward the goal you are to picture yourself knocking it away. So you are blocking negative pictures, sounds, feelings, smells, tastes, thoughts, and reasons. These include: "I can't..." "I'm unlucky..." "What am I doing wrong..." and metaphor such as the lottery ticket.

Now, before you play this game you really have to agree you will do it. That means getting everyone up there to sign off on it. Right now, by saying these things you believe you are protecting yourself, or learning.

In the stead of these negative patterns we will put in positive patterns that will still allow you to protect yourself, and to learn. In fact you've probably already learned them here on this DJ board. This includes advice like having a life, believing that you make your own luck, asking questions like "What can I learn from this?" "What can I do better next time?" "What do I need to prepare for in this situation so as to avoid harm?" "What do I need to write down so that I remember it?"


So on to the strategy:

Picture yourself with a girl. I know this is hard because you don't know what this picture would look like. That's okay. Her face can be obscured right now in the picture. But just picture the two of you laughing, and talking. Holding each other. If you start to feel sad at this point, put yourself into the movie. Associate yourself into the event so that it feels as if it's happening to YOU. Now feel how good it feels. Do this once or twice.

Picture yourself walking up to girls the right DJ way (whatever that is - Hey, I'm new!!) x10

Add yourself saying the right DJ things. Now anything in particular - so don't memorize a speech. In fact practice a different thing each time and see which ones work. Make sure you are OUT of the picture, watching yourself. x15

Add the great feelings you will get EVEN if you mess up a few times, by approaching the girl. Do this twenty times. (x20)

Now relax, and take a break http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/smile.gif In fact, the first part of this exersize may take many days to do. The important part is putting in at least 85% each time you do it!

Action plan:

Use personal ads and online chat forums. You seem to be a good writer and have a lot of interests to talk about. Be funny, ask questions. Follow the 30-70 rule of ask-tell. Have an attitude of "What does it matter I'm just having fun online" Be outrageous and playful. See how many times you can get her to laugh.

When you get a taker, be smart about it, okay? There's a lot of wack jobs out there. Always be safe. However, equally true is that there are many good looking women who JUST LIKE YOU are trying to find a great guy like you. So say no to the ones who don't match your vision, but keep going after those that do.

If I am being a total moron and you have already done all these things, please let me know and I will think of something else.

Good luck

-Jon

-----------------
"Hello my name is Leon Phelps ... I have made love to many fine ladies. From the lowliest bus station skank, to the classiest, most sophisticated, educated, debutant, high society ... bus station skank."

[This message has been edited by JonnyNice (edited 05-11-2002).]

[El MonoLoco]

*YAWN*
Good morning everyone. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Lets see what I can do to calm you guys down a bit.

Krd you say, "Once again, it's the end of the semester and still no girl"

I say: you probably get good grades don't you? Thats a good thing. School is way more important for YOU right now.

"I just can't figure out what I'm doing wrong"

Nothing if what I said above is true. Women aren't a priority for you and they should never be.

"I've been trying for five or six years"

You're keeping records? You've been trying to hard then.Relax a bit and watch for signals more carefully. You don't have to rush things.

"I've been coming to this site for nearly three years"

Wow, thats longer than I have.

"reading the information, but I've still yet to see any results"

Hm? Reading AND practicing are both essential to DJ success.


"I've gotten phone numbers, but I've learned quickly that just because a girl gives me her number, it doesn't mean she's interested."

Yes, this is true but not all girls are like that. Remeber you can't get down if you call some chick and she can't/doesn't want to go out with you on suchandsuch day. You have no clue whats going on in her life.She could have a test the next day and has to study. Or worse her pet goldfish just died. You never know and they never tell you. Its a b*tch I know but don't give up on the first swing. Take one more shot down the road if that doesn't work NEXT the ho and move on

"I'm all out of ideas. What the hell am I dong wrong?"

You only think you all out of ideas. But this site offers an unlimited supply so don't give up hope there my friend.And the only thing you are doing wrong is you're trying to damn hard. You need to relax and not depend on getting woman.Sure you may want them and they seem to not want you. But its all in your head, trust me. When YOU start to want them less THEY will start to want you more. Its wierd but it works that way. Women are backwards like that.

"After all, this isn't rocket science."

No its not rocket science but it is like science.You have to experiment over and over until the results you want appear. Most of the time they won't. And a lot of your theorys won't work.But some will just keep trying.

"Why is something that seems to come so easy for most everyone else is so hard for me?"

Some guys have a natural abitlity to interact with woman. I am definately not one of them.But it doesn't stop me.
I used to have a poster that showed a pool stick breaking a set of racked balls it said:

" All you need in life are Balls and a few good Breaks."

To me it meant that if you got the balls (confidence) to go out and achieve whatever you wanted eventually something will work, a break.

So you say your starting a band too? Work on that musicians always get chicks. They love the fact that you have the balls to get up in front of people and do what you like to do. One suggestion for your next show. Pass out flyers in person. Go around and pass them out to any girl you see. This will help in approaching as its non threatening for both of you. Plus a conversation is going to happen because your band is new and people are going to be curious.This gives you mystery and we all know how chicks dig mystery.

hope that helps http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

[Dr. Pimp]

Yeah all that “get a passion in life other than women” is all good, but that isn’t directly what will get you any girls. You just need to keep focusing on the basic steps.

1) Approach
2) Number Close
3) Call for date
4) Work game during first date and try to get laid (you won’t always get laid on the first date but you have to TRY to… “aim for the stars”, that’s the key)

You’re correct in saying that numbers don’t necessarily translate into interest but this is what you have to remember, “If there is just a small spark of interest in her, you can develop that into a full-blown infatuation”.

So keep at getting numbers and making those calls. The only way to develop your skills is to grind through the experiences. You might even find them to be fun, stimulating, and exciting. You left out some of the details of your interactions (usual approaching time, places of interaction, responses, experiences, etc…), but if you’d like some helpful feedback, post them and the members will take a look at them and give you a few pointers.

One last thing, one of the best passions you can have that have a significant influence on the attraction level of the opposite sex is working on your health and fitness, and no, not vanity fitness, I’m talking about really sticking to a workout and diet regimen and making it a part of your life.

Dr.


[This message has been edited by Dr. Pimp (edited 05-11-2002).]

[Page]

Originally posted by crowes22:
Your'e trying too hard. Quit looking for a GF. Let 'her' stumble upon YOU.

Immesrse yourself in your life, and where you are aiming it, forget all the other frills.

Crowes is right. Listen to him.

[Chubbs Peterson]

Originally posted by Dr. Pimp:
You’re correct in saying that numbers don’t necessarily translate into interest but this is what you have to remember, “If there is just a small spark of interest in her, you can develop that into a full-blown infatuation”.

So keep at getting numbers and making those calls. The only way to develop your skills is to grind through the experiences. You might even find them to be fun, stimulating, and exciting.


krd,
Dr. Pimp makes a REALLY good point.
And it relates directly to your self esteem, which is part of the issue here.

Whether you know it or not, part of the problem is that your desire to lose your viginity hinders your ability to just go out and have fun with girls. Probably, you are too preoccupied with the idea of finally having sex that it makes if difficult to carry out the DJ program. It puts women in the position of having extra high value to you. Believe me, I know how that feels.

So you have to begin to think that YOU are the prize, not them. How do you make yourself the prize? By continuing to do shows and do stuff you like. Just because you did ONE show at your dorm and not many people showed up, you're ready to throw in the towel. You gotta keep doing more shows. You've gotta make yourself highly VISIBLE as a person who is making things happen.

Getting back to what Dr. pimp wrote...Getting a girl's number means that she has some degree of interest in you. Remember, girls take a while to warm up. You have to slooooowwwwly pursue her sometimes. That's how you can turn the spark of interest into a flame and then eventually a four-alarm fire.

If you have problems warming her up yourself, there are other ways to do it. And that has to do with establishing a good reputation and getting girls to talk about you. Did you see that movie "American Pie?" I forgot the name of the character, but there was the one dude who had all the girls in school talking about him as he walked down the hall. He basically had someone spread good rumors about him and all the girls in his school were interested. That REALLY works in real life. Figure out ways that you can get your name out there. Keep trying to build your name as a musician on campus.

And keep getting those numbers.

[krd]

You've got some good advice, Jonnynice, especially from a guy who's new to this forum. But as many DJ's here have said, keeping such advice in mind and actually using it in real life situations are two different things. It's always harder in the real world, because things never actually hapen the way you see them in your head. A girl may come out with something you didn't expect her to say, or fail to say or do something that is crucial to making your next move, and you get thrown off.

As for personal ads and chat forums, I'm reluctant to try those. In my criteria for choosing a girl, I admit that looks are definitely on the list, and with the Internet and personal ads, there's no way of telling what they actually look like. Even if they do send you a photo or something, how do you know if the picture is actually of them?

I have tried an online dating service before, and actually got as far as talking to a girl on the phone. In asking her where she worked, she just happened to mention the same place my mom works at. But neither my mom, nor anyone at her workplace, had ever heard of the girl. I found that to be strange and a little creepy. Which brings up another point. Without initially meeting someone in person, it becomes a lot harder to tell whether or not they are in their right mind. After that call, I stopped hearing from the girl altogether. That experience kind of soured me on the idea of personal dating services.

El MonoLoco, although I am indeed a college student, my grades are not necessarily all that great. In fact, one of my goals at the beginning of the semester was to do really well in school, so that if a girl needed help in studying or something, I could assist her. But here I am at the end of the semester, and I've really lost my motivation. Now that finals are approaching, I'm just hoping I can get a passing grade in all my classes. Also, because I'm a music major, most of the other people I go to school with are musicians too. So it's become a bit harder for me to stand out in that respect, too. But I do like your "passing out flyers" idea. One girl recently did that in one of my classes for her last shows with her band. Because of prior commitment's I couldn't make it, but I wonder how many people actually went that night.

Dr. Pimp, of the four steps you've presented, I actually have the first two down, although I haven't practiced in awhile. I kind of figured that this semester, it would be better for me to just let things flow naturally (although that hasn't gotten me anywhere, either). The problem always seems to come at the third step, where I have to call her up. First of all, if I see her in school frequently, I'd much rather talk to her in person. When I call someone on the phone, I always feel like I am somehow invading their privacy, and I get nervous. Most of the times when I have attempted, I could never seem to reach her. And I don't want to try to many times, or it'll make me seem too desperate and scare her off, especially if she's got caller ID. I'm not saying I won't try again in the future, but I'm just explaining the reality of what tends to happen to me in such instances.

Chubbs Peterson, like I've explained, losing my virginity is NOT what I am trying to do right now. I just want to be able to know that a girl could actually find me attractive and desirable. I've not yet had that proven to me, and by getting a girl to go out with me, I'll finally be able to find out for sure. And though slowly pursuing her is all well and good--I'd much rather do it that way--if I don't hurry up, another guy will take her out from under me if she's the least bit attractive. Moving fast is something that just doesn't come naturally for me. Plus, I've found that most women who are even just a little bit attractive, seem to be in an exclusive relationship. Nobody shops around anymore.

Another obstacle is the fact that I don't live in a dorm, so I don't have the same interaction that other students have in such living situations. It's much easier to hook up if you both live in the same building (or even on the same campus). Even so, I agree with you that I've got to continue to play more shows, and I plan on doing just that in the coming semesters, not only to get girls, but also because it's what I love to do, and I may eventually wnat to make a career of it.

Anyway, I appreciate your advice. It just bugs me that after all this time, I still can't seem to get a girl to show any interest in me for more than half a second. I only hope that one day the advice I've learned on this site will start paying off. But it hasn't happened yet.

[Dr. Pimp]

First of all, if I see her in school frequently, I'd much rather talk to her in person. When I call someone on the phone, I always feel like I am somehow invading their privacy, and I get nervous.

A while ago there was some advice from one of the members on how to handle this exact situation. He said that if you talk to her regularly, you should skip the phone call and ask her out in person. Makes complete sense to me.

I know it takes a lot of effort to learn all the advice on this board, but that’s the effort you and every other newbie has to put in so that quality contributions can be added to our board. I suggest you become an “armchair DJ” for a while to help you with your articulation and thought processes regarding Don Juan philosophy.

Oh yeah, and what’s this about invading privacy? Don’t give yourself those types of excuses. Make the call and don’t give a fukk. Trust me, you’ll be able to step up to the challenge. If you can’t, you have gained the valuable experience that I was talking about.

Being nervous is understandable. A great way to guide you through the first phone conversation is to write up an outline of potential topics and key questions. Also think about what types of questions she may ask you that will be relevant to your questions and mentally prepare answers she would eat up.

You might not even need to use the outline after the first few key questions if the conversation develops into something she wants to talk to you about. I know it seems schemish to have a pre-made phone convo, but it will surely help you focus your thoughts and warm up your game for the real deal. When you become a pro, you’ll be able to reflect on your past phone convos without having to prepare anything because you’ll have your pimp experiences to guide you.

[Taz]

Krd, you said you're going to get a summer job? Please take into consideration my post in the tips about becoming a waiter. This will give you loads of practice in communication (the most important trait, way more than looks). Plus, there will be tons of hot chicks working there with which you can have some dating potentials with. Look to the future man, the past is completely irrelevant.

[Jake Steed]

Hey, krd, I've been following your posts for quite some time now. I have to congratulate you on your persistence. You have definately gotten your ass out there in the field and approached girls, which is far more than the fvck-head AFCs do.

Right now you're just down in the dumps. We all get like that now and then. I know this has been said many many times, but I agree with crowes, that you need to work on improving yourself for YOU, not girls.

one of my goals at the beginning of the semester was to do really well in school, so that if a girl needed help in studying or something, I could assist her. --krd

See, you've explained you only wanted to do well in school to meet chicks. You should be in school to pursue your PASSION. Right now, it's all about them. But it should all be about YOU.

You need to find your PASSION. Your PASSION is something bigger, more important to you than anything else, especially better than girls. This will be the thing that drives you to get up in the morning and stay up late.

After you find your PASSION, you need a few other "side" passions. Like a sport or a hobby--something you can excel at. Something that will make you say, "Thank god I don't have a date tonight. I can finally work on my _____."

Take "finding a girl" down a couple notches on the importance scale, so that you truly don't give a fvck. Then go out with your best DJ friends--ones that score the most--and go clubbing/do social stuff. While out, experiment with different approach styles. Try new approaches, just for the fun of it. It should be just for your entertainment. Be the alpha male. Performing your music is a step in the right direction.

Try to be a different "you". What I mean by that is, for a month or so, change your style (clothing, hair, listen to different music, etc.) Try to experience new things in life. If you're a skater, dress a little preppier and comb your hair. If you mostly listen to classical music, pick up some metal or hip hop. Mix it up.

The reason I suggest all this is, you need to break out of the routine you've created around you. Life sounds kind of redundant for you now, and you need to do something about it. For the next month, krd, try to have as many new experiences as you can.

Jake

[Anubi]

I haven't read all of the other posts but heres my own opinion (and its straight to the point)

STOP TRYING TO BUILD CONFIDENCE TO ATTRACT WOMEN.
instead build confidence in general

STOP TRYING TO BE FUNNY TO ATTRACT WOMEN.
just BE funny.


what i'm trying to say is stop having the mindset "i have to talk to women" and start thinking more of "i'm going to talk to people today, and if women happen to be one of the people i will talk to, so be it"

stop doing things to attract women... and just improve yourself

i'm no buddhist but buddhism teaches to let go of all desire, including the desire to become enlightened... only then will you be enlightened. i think this applies to this situation.
and finally, wait it out. if someone wants something bad enough, and they work at it... they will get it.

most of us in this forum are strungling just like u; i have the prob of changing my reputation in school (and beleive me it's hard)... good luck

[backbreaker]

ok think about this.. if you are tired of all this and none of it is working, when you "quit trying to be a dj" what are you going to do then? i mean, you still aren't going to have any luck with women.. the only difference is that when you do meet a women you will not know what to do with her, so just stick in there...

[backbreaker]

ok think about this.. if you are tired of all this and none of it is working, when you "quit trying to be a dj" what are you going to do then? i mean, you still aren't going to have any luck with women.. the only difference is that when you do meet a women you will not know what to do with her, so just stick in there...

[JonnyNice]

krd,
I'm pretty pissed myself right now. Two potentional relationships just ended for me and I'm now back to ground zero. It's really frustrating. And don't get me started on my miserable friendships! So, down two girls, and I'm asking myself what's the point? Why keep trying? It doesn't make any sense. In the movie Zoolander, one of the characters exclaims "I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!" Looking at it that way makes me laugh at the issue a little. Because sometimes by just taking a step back and looking at something logically, you can make big changes.

For instance, in your situation, you have already made amazing progress regarding Dr. Pimp's strategy. You have done both 1 and 2 (something I can't even do yet). That's really great. And it should feel really great to you, knowing, that you're one of the few who actually followed through on learning. Actually went out there and applied it- made it a part of him. Well, take that good feeling with you when you attack steps 3 and 4.

You want to be able to call\ask for a date? That requires confidence. There are two ways to gain cofidence: Cognitive exersizes, and Physical Action. I agree with you about the personals. They were just good for my situation. But what I really wanted you to find was a system with which you could reliably pick up women. For instance: a system whereby you can say if I do this x hours this week I will meey y number of women. Not sleep with, just meet. This helps with confidence because you KNOW there's going to be another girl coming. Another way is deal with big events so guarentee large numbers. Or just mentally show yourself how big the world really is and how any one interaction could be the biggest deal in the world OR could be totally insignificant). Convince your brain that there will always be more women!! That is key #1 to confidence. So please, follow through here. I know it's not easy, but the nice thing about thought games and experiments is that only you are watching. You can't mess up. You can create whatever you want. Now you do bring up another excellent point about visualization. (You are so helpful to me helping you by asking so many questions. Keep em coming.) You're absolutely right that reality will not be exactly like your imagination. How could it? That would be impossible for everything to cosmically turn out just like your imagination. The process works on a few levels but none of them mystic. On a most basic level it trains your nervous system to associate positive feelings to the girl. In other words: WE'RE WORKING ON YOU RIGHT NOW. You're imagining things that make YOU feel safe, you feel energized, with the girl, that you are confident with her, that you are caring with her, and all those other DJ traits that make you irrisistable to her. Let's say we got you feeling strongly motivated. What condition would this fix? Well what's the exact opposit of extreme motivation and passion? How about thinking something is really hard? So we try to keep you motivated by doing visualization.
Second. Visualization lets you practice. Depending upon your time availability, imagination, and visualization skill you may even be able to really "run through" various senarios. Nothing comes out exactly identical, but many people say "it happened just as I pictured it would."
Third. You are no longer taken off guard by success. Let's say you didn't practice by visualizing. What would happen if you tried something and succeeded. Well, you might, just for a split second, become confused or hesitate. In most cases your date will understand and won't care at all. But I do think that if you want to be your best, so should avoid as many avoidable mistakes as possible - that way you have leeway when the unavoidable ones stop by.
Fourth - Sometimes by doing stuff like this you end up changing something higher up like an identity. For instance, if you picture yourself enough as a Don Juan, you might start to believe it. If your identity changes everything beneath that level changes, so all beliefs, attitudes and behaviors.

Why am I talking all about confidence? Why is everyone here focusing on that? Because it you know the skills. If you're not getting girls, something within you was holding back. Before now you may not have known this, but now that you know you can continue the fighter stronger. Practice practice practice. Follow through on these techniques. Make everything a game. Go to places where no one knows you. Find a buddy to practice with. Or if you have to just jump in kicking and screaming!!

Hope this helped.

-Jon

[leoncour]

Man this guy, krd, sounds just like me. I'm 22 though. Good thread (for me anyways)

[JUST ME]

its because you are doing something wrong when calling- like calling too soon, leaving messages(no challenge),and-or being too agressive=desperate.i bet its one or all of these????????????

[IntermediateDonJuaner]

I understand your situation here krd, and I feel the pain you're feeling now.

You are right krd. If a person has no dates,no friends and etc to go out on friday night, then he or she will be considered as a f*cking loser or something because he/she is not cool and whatever fu*ck it could be.

But let us take a step back and analyze the situation again. Let us think of it when we're back in HS or college. There is this guy that is so called "The Alpha Male" or "The Cool Guy" that has so many friends, get lots of dates and etc. How did he do that? THAT is the MAIN queston.

How come he could ATTRACT so many girls and become the alpha male? How come he has many friends and he's not always alone on friday or saturday nights? You NEED to find out the answers to these questions and the problems will be solved. Right now, I am doing my best to analyze many situations on why people are so successful and have everything they want in life

Once I have completed my research , I will try to pass what I've got to others here and it will be you of course. Hopefully, I will get positive results out of my experiments.

Anyway, good luck and DJ'S pls advice krd as well. I think there are not enough people giving him advice yet.!

[PeterNorthStyle]

I understand where your coming from there krd,

Everyone else here does as well, you gotta remember that.

I think it is good when you realise how similar our challenges as guys are.

There is a lot of good perspectives others have posted there for you.

My perspective is that you ned to really get the one or two things that count the most from the dj bible and these posts, forget the list of 300 ways etc,

Let a girl get you, take your energy away from trying. Psychologically "leaning"towards things robs you of of your centre and power base, (read the small book by stuart wilde called "silent power" or go to www.innerself.com (http://www.innerself.com) www.stuartwilde.com) (http://www.stuartwilde.com)) . When you spread your energy too thin, take on too much, and "lean towards" things (physcially,emotionally, mentally) it can wane your main underlying source of power. Better to let things build from within.

Check out "the 48laws of power" as well for a couple of good pointers.

make on or 2 good useful distinctions AND THATS ALL. regarding this, and then ge on with RESOURCING YOURSELF and LETTING IT HAPPEN instead of "trying" "leaning" "comparing" öbsessing"
Thats what i wish I did when I was 23. I wish i just paced myself and stopped leaning out trrying to get things adn trashing my inner core of power.

Dont place too much emphasis on losing your virginity either, I suspect that is a big issue for you at the moment that may be subconsciously affecting you, remember, a lot of the girls you are appoaching have lost theirs, it isnt the first its the regular and the best that matters. - a lot of really hot stunning girls lost thier virginityy in a drunk fvcked up situation that they would rather forget, and who really cares in the end anyway?

Silent power, no leaning

[tonight]

Some good tips here:

Originally posted by JUST ME:
its because you are doing something wrong when calling- like calling too soon, leaving messages(no challenge),and-or being too agressive=desperate.i bet its one or all of these

The Paradox of desire:

Originally posted by El MonoLoco:
When YOU start to want them less THEY will start to want you more. Its weird but it works that way. Women are backwards like that.




Exactly. This was my problem and I am learning lots from this site on how to overcome it. It is so true. In my past, the girls I liked alot seem to be repelled by my high desire. Conversely, girls who liked me alot seemed to be attracted to me because of my lack of interest in them. The more I ignored them, the more they liked me. This is the paradox of desire.

A couple of other tips, detailed in the DJ Bible, (which I am still in the process of reading and applying) The DJ Bible provides the knowledge, but you must supply the action:

-put yourself in situations where girls outnumber guys.
-don't be afraid to approach any woman, no matter how attractive. Many guys are afraid to do this, but don't. You have nothing to lose if she says "no" (just move on to someone else) and much to gain if she says "yes." I used to think, "oh, she's too hot, she probably has a boyfriend" and never bothered approaching. Now I don't give a sh!t and go up to her anyway.
-don't hit on one girl after another in the same place in a short time period
-use jealousy to your advantage. If you like a girl and she may like you, deliberately flirt with other girls in front of her.


Krd, you have got to tell us some examples of specific experiences you have had with women. This way some of the guys here can figure out what went wrong and how to correct it.

------------------
If you're getting laid, this song will get you in the mood:

"10 seconds to love" by Motley Crue"

[This message has been edited by tonight (edited 05-16-2002).]

[This message has been edited by tonight (edited 05-16-2002).]

[krd]

I'd like to thank everyone for offering their advice. This is a real tough topic for me, and sometimes I just need a little encouragement to keep going. There aren't very many people whom I can talk to about such things. I talk my mom's ear off sometimes, and I know she gets a little annoyed as well as frustrated, because she knows there's not much she can do about it. She's never had to be in my situation.

I know it takes a lot of effort to learn all the advice on this board, but that’s the effort you and every other newbie has to put in so that quality contributions can be added to our board. I suggest you become an “armchair DJ” for a while to help you with your articulation and thought processes regarding Don Juan philosophy.--Dr. Pimp

So what exactly is an "armchair DJ"?

I agree that it takes a lot of effort, but after a while, I would kind of think the effort would start paying off. I definitely can't claim to be a newbie anymore. Yet I've been stuck in this same position longer than I'd care to admit. I'm at the point now where I just want to see some results.

Right now you're just down in the dumps. We all get like that now and then. I know this has been said many many times, but I agree with crowes, that you need to work on improving yourself for YOU, not girls.--Jake Steed

i'm no buddhist but buddhism teaches to let go of all desire, including the desire to become enlightened... only then will you be enlightened. i think this applies to this situation.--Anubi

Let a girl get you, take your energy away from trying. Psychologically "leaning"towards things robs you of of your centre and power base...When you spread your energy too thin, take on too much, and "lean towards" things (physcially,emotionally, mentally) it can wane your main underlying source of power. Better to let things build from within.--PeterNorthStyle

I know I shouldn't be making this my top priority, but I just can't get it out of my head. Being in college, there are girls everywhere. I hate to admit it, but my main motivation for going to college has to do with meeting girls. I know it absolutely shouldn't be, but as much as I've tried, it's very hard to change my mode of thinking after five years. I am certainly willing to let go of my desires as Buddha recommends, but my desires just won't seem to let go of me. It's like when someone makes fun of you or calls you a name. As much as you try to convince yourself of the whole "sticks and stones" philosophy, it's still going to hurt.

Then go out with your best DJ friends--ones that score the most--and go clubbing/do social stuff. While out, experiment with different approach styles. Try new approaches, just for the fun of it. It should be just for your entertainment. Be the alpha male.

I think that's a very good idea. Unfortunately, in the same way that I have trouble getting girls, it's hard for me to find male friends who I can hang out with and go clubbing with. And since I don't have a car, I can't go by myself. One of my male friends offered to take me with him to a strip club, which is his weekly ritual. Not surprisingly, this guy doesn't have a girlfriend. In my opinion, such an atmosphere is absolutely not conducive to becoming a DJ, since the only women at these places are the ones who get paid to be there. As far as the regular clubs go, I've been once or twice. It seems like it would be really hard to try and chat up a girl with the music blaring non-stop. Nevertheless, I'd definitely be willing to go if someone would take me with them. Any volunteers?

its because you are doing something wrong when calling- like calling too soon, leaving messages(no challenge),and-or being too agressive=desperate.i bet its one or all of these????????????--JUST ME

Boy, I wish it were that simple. But I definitely know the drill: wait about three to five days, call her to set up a date, if she says no without giving a counter-offer, forget her and move on. Right now, I'm wondering whether this routine really works. It's been debated on this site before: I's it really necessary to wait that many days? Or should you call sooner, while you're still fresh in her mind and she hasn't made any other plans yet? I know it's important to remain a challenge, but isn't it better to wait until you've at least gone out once? I honestly can't say I know.

But let us take a step back and analyze the situation again. Let us think of it when we're back in HS or college. There is this guy that is so called "The Alpha Male" or "The Cool Guy" that has so many friends, get lots of dates and etc. How did he do that? THAT is the MAIN queston.

How come he could ATTRACT so many girls and become the alpha male? How come he has many friends and he's not always alone on friday or saturday nights? You NEED to find out the answers to these questions and the problems will be solved. Right now, I am doing my best to analyze many situations on why people are so successful and have everything they want in life--IntermediateDonJuaner

I absolutely agree with you there, Intermediate. I am currently in college, and one skill that I have definitely not mastered is the ability to be an "alpha male". In groups of people, I often get overlooked. Many times, when I say something, nobody hears me, or they aren't interested in what I have to say. Of course, it also depends on the group of people. Some people are more friendly than others. And everybody has their brief moments when they get to be the center of attention and people are hanging on their every word. I live for those moments. But for me, this only comes every once in a great while. Most of the time I get left out and I don't know what to do about it. It makes me feel unimportant or irrelevant in peoples' lives. So I wish you luck on your research and I look forward to hearing the results.

-put yourself in situations where girls outnumber guys.--tonight

Where can I find such situations? More specifically, where can I find such situations where the girls are actually the same age as me? It seems like early twenty-somethings are harder to come by than other age groups. They all hang out with their circle of friends, or they work all hours to support their college tuition, or they've already got some other dude on their arm. If I were looking for a middle-aged chick, an elderly lady, or a minor, all I have to do is walk out my front door!

-don't be afraid to approach any woman, no matter how attractive. Many guys are afraid to do this, but don't. You have nothing to lose if she says "no" (just move on to someone else) and much to gain if she says "yes." I used to think, "oh, she's too hot, she probably has a boyfriend" and never bothered approaching. Now I don't give a sh!t and go up to her anyway.
-don't hit on one girl after another in the same place in a short time period
-use jealousy to your advantage. If you like a girl and she may like you, deliberately flirt with other girls in front of her.

I have already gone through a phase where I would just make myself approach random girls and start talking to them. I have reached the point where I'd rather avoid the stress and just let things flow. Plus, with it being the end of the semester and all, it would be awkward for me to go up to a girl I see all the time after not talking to her all year, and just start a conversation. So far, neither approach has made a difference, although I plan on going back to the old way next semester, when nobody's seen each other in a while and it'll make more sense to try and catch up on things. I have also had the expeirence of being able to flirt with one girl I like in front of another one. Did it work? Maybe someday I'll find out.

Krd, you have got to tell us some examples of specific experiences you have had with women. This way some of the guys here can figure out what went wrong and how to correct it.

If you want to know about some of my experiences with women, just go back and read some of my old posts. You'll find no shortage of specifics!

By the way, Taz, I love your idea of finding a summer job as a waiter. I'm definitely considering it!

[This message has been edited by krd (edited 05-17-2002).]

[Bones]

How can you not have kissed a girl by 23? Time to put some more effort in

[Tiziano Lariani]

krd my man,

I understand your situation completely, because it is similar to my own.

Especially now at the end of the semester, i have plans on chicks in my class which I have seen for a whole year but never approached.

I don't care about the outcome cause they're not exactly 10s, but i'm curious to know!

I am in an analogous situation socially, and I've stopped being resentful about it.
Find some people who appreciate you, who you respect, and dont try to please.
That is what I'm doing, and it's improving.

Thanx 4 your post http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/wink.gif

[El MonoLoco]

Ok I'm back to throw my 2 cents in again.

krd it still sounds like all your troubles are in your head.The more you think about how fvcked everything is and how you can't get a girl, the more likely everything is going to be fvcked and you will never get any girl. I believe it was Pook who said "as you think you shall become" (something like that). Once you develope the attitude of a DJ other attributes of being a DJ will emerge.


"So what exactly is an "armchair DJ"?"

What Dr.Pimp was trying to say is what I just told you. Don't put all your attention on getting A girl. Put it on yourself. Come to this site daily and read, reread, then read again. Learn what it takes to be a DJ.You say you've done this, but if your still not scoring you didn't learn it right the first time. So keep learning until its second nature. It will happen eventually

"Unfortunately, in the same way that I have trouble getting girls, it's hard for me to find male friends who I can hang out with and go clubbing with."

Again you are depending on another person to give you happiness. STOP! There is only ONE person in your life you can bring you happiness and that is YOU. If you can't go out with anyone, go out alone. I do this all the time when my AFC friends want to play video games and I want to get out on the town. Be your own best friend, its a good way to live.

"And since I don't have a car, I can't go by myself"

Ever hear of a taxi?

"In groups of people, I often get overlooked. Many times, when I say something, nobody hears me, or they aren't interested in what I have to say."

This used to happen to me so don't trip. I used to be "the quite type". Just be patient with what you say. It's not about how much you say but what you say that get people to listen. And about being overlooked, once a few buddies of mine were hanging outside of a bar one night and these chicks walk by. I said " hey ladies how ya doin tonight?" and they walked on by like they didn't hear me. My buddy who is standing not 2 feet from me goes " hey miss" and they replied, smiled and kept going. Man I was so confused. Things like that happen to me sometimes but I don't let it get to me anymore. You got to think that if they don't want to talk to you, date you, say hi, or what ever, its THEIR loss not YOURS.

"I have already gone through a phase where I would just make myself approach random girls and start talking to them."

Hey thats great. But were your convos just in passing or did they reach a better level.Did you ever go for the #?

"I have reached the point where I'd rather avoid the stress and just let things flow. "

There should be no stress in just talking to a chick. Its not like she holds your life in her hand. You can let things flow but you can control the flow.

"Plus, with it being the end of the semester and all, it would be awkward for me to go up to a girl I see all the time after not talking to her all year, and just start a conversation"

Wrong. This is probably the best time. You know that hottie in the back of class you've had your eye on. Go talk to her. I bet you find out that she's had her eye on you the whole semester and was wondering if she would ever get a chance to talk to you. Remember there are AFC women out there too.


I can tell your struggling, and its ok, we all do sometime.
My last tip may be a challenge for you if your up to it.

You say your in a band. You've tried to play gigs. Why don't you throw a party at the very end of school? People will be done with finals and they just want to relax and have a good summer. No better way to start your summer than at a good party. If you aren't able to do this find out who is throwing the end of the year party and get your band on the line up. If you play the rockstar/musician role long enough chicks will just seem to fall into your lap. Trust me I've seen it happen to dudes who were total dorks. Suddenly they're big pimps because they're in a band.

In the game of life you are only delt a specific # of cards. Its how you play those cards that determines if you win or not.

Good luck bro everything will work out.Promise. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

[CLOONEY]

krd, you are telling us that you have NEVER had a girl interested in you, EVER!!!! I find that hard to beleive, there must have been a girl interested in you at some time?? If you are handsome like you say you are then there is no probs, or even if you are just average looking then you shouldn't have a problem either. You simply have to start talking to girls ALL the time, sit next to them in class, sit next to them at a bar, "practice makes perfect", this saying doesn't come from no-where.

Also like everyone else has said, work on YOUR life, go to the gym, work, study, take up new hobbies. Basically just do things that you like doing, you've got to look out for number 1!!!!! When you talk to all these girls, just talk to them expecting nothing in return, this will ease some of the pressure you put on yourself. Don't even ask for numbers. Once you are confident talking with girls, then you will find out "through the grapvine" that they are interested in you!!! Girls sh*t, they p*ss, they consist of carbon, water, the same things that we do too. They are nothing special!!!

------------------
Life is a game....PLAY IT!!

[IntermediateDonJuaner]

Guys, could you be more careful with your words? I know you are trying to help krd, but the way you make it sound is like adding salt to the wound.

KRD,

It won't be easy for the beginning if you're having no girls right now. Furthermore, you never know when you are going to meet one. And yet, you must also find out if she is the LTR material. Don't mess with the professional daters,stroker,gold-diggers and players cause they're out looking for weak victims to harm them.!

So krd, what I suggest now is you should associate yourself with your buddies that are cool and they might probably helped you to widen your circle of friends.

Until then, keep trying and don't give up!

[crowes22]

krd, you seem to be a level headed guy willing to be persistant about life, not just women, be sure to stay aware of that.

You've been given good advice here man, and like Jake Steed said at least you keep trying, that's half the battle my man! Yea we do all get down/ in a slump, it's a part of life.

That's not a bad thing! If you didn't hit a low once in a while, how would you enjoy the ride when you were on a high? But don't feel low about you b/c there is something you want you haven't gotten yet. I don't think you do feel that way BTW.

Got your band--cool deal man, have fun w/ it, work hard at it, but don't do that for girls, do it b/c you love music. I have seen it too many times where guys do certain things just to meet chicks, no other reason.

Some may say that's ok, but personally I think it's pretty pathetic. These clowns seem to drop these hobbies when they do have a girl, and usually the girl soon drops them. I think women can see through that shyt. It takes some of them longer than others.

I am not against doing things that place you around chicks, not at all. Like the waiter thing, you'll be meeting alot of honeys, good deal, but you'll be learning a new skill and making money. But remember the goal, do it for you, b/c you want to, not in a desperate attempt to meet chicks.

Don't look to school to provide chicks, that is not what its for, like another said,you may meet a girl anywhere.

The virgin thing-I sensed you were putting pressure on yourself to end that, not saying you are/ just what i sensed.

If you think you may be, ya gotta let that shyt go. It's the same thing as 'peer pressure'. And peer pressure is BS, it's a fukkin copout for weak people that have no sense of self.

Look I drank underage, still drink, smoked underage, still smoke, smoked pot, popped pills, ate shrumes, did cocaine, (I quit drugs a few years back) but I always hated that fukkin peer pressure BS. I did that shyt cause I wanted to, no other reason, and I accept full responsibilty for any fallout.

So *if* you feel pressure from you or society on any of this, just fukkin blow it off, forget it. Just do things cause you want to, no alterior motives, and you'll see things come together, stay focused, always WORK HARD at ANYTHING you set out to do, (like graduating college) your band/job.

I really don't know what to say that hasn't been said man, keep your chin up, there's not one damn thing wrong w/ the way your life sits now, NADA. And remember when you hit a low/bump in the road, learn what you can from it, and fukk it, drive on.

[SoSuave.com]

To The Archive.

[Squy]

My first thought is: Its just life! Think about this after 6 years you have come this far, but what if you havent found this site? It would take you 12 or more years to improved like this. So any improvements as little as it seem to be IS improvements. Some people make fast and some make slow progress, thats just the way it is. just keep running the race, you would finish it eventually

---------------
"I haven't failed, I've found 10,000 ways that don't work. (I had to success, because I finally ran out of things that would'nt work)"
-Thomas Edison

[This message has been edited by Squy (edited 11-03-2002).]

[krd]

Originally posted by Squy:
[B]My first thought is: Its just life! Think about this after 6 years you have come this far, but what if you havent found this site? It would take you 12 or more years to improved like this. So any improvements as little as it seem to be IS improvements. Some people make fast and some make slow progress, thats just the way it is. just keep running the race, you would finish it eventually

Wow, it's cool to have a post that I started in the archive--I guess its a sign of how long I've been here! But I don't know if I totally agree that this site actually helped my progress. The rules have been in my mind so long, that I can't talk to a girl without worrying if it's the "DJ" thing to do, or trying to contemplate my next move--which practically never works out the way I plan. If I start to become hopeful that I may have some sort of chance with a girl, my thoughts are soon replaced with "She's just being friendly" or "her 'IL' isn't high enough" or "you didn't say the right things, you shoulda been more aggressive" or stuff like that. It's really stressful for me and I have a hard time letting things flow. Maybe if I didn't have such knowledge about the "DJ rules", and instead learned from talking with friends and my through my own trial and error, perhaps I would be better off. But then again, I don't want to just stop following this site's advice, bacause there's also a chance that I could be worse off if I do, which is why I haven't left yet. Bottom line is, I haven't seen any real results yet, but I really don't know what else to do.

[This message has been edited by krd (edited 11-03-2002).]

[Pursuivant]

Hi krd.

Well, it's worth for you to read this article.
Why? Well, i'm 25. not from the states. Actually from middle europe and at 22 i was in exactly the very same situation you are now.
And this is not the old fashioned US. Here if you are not having sex regularly when you are 18 then you are krap. (No say when everybody, girls included are talking in school parties about explicit ways of eating p*ssy, and someone to make fun of you just ask you what do you think...)

So i hope you will find something useful in my words.

I won't say that i'm on the other side now. my life is NOT perfect, i haven't found the girl i'm looking for, but the progress i've got in these last 2 years are for my point of view great. (great for me. Pathetic for most DJ's probably).
Well, here's my recipee:
1) Build your body. You already know which kind of guys girls like. Go to the gym. (read first in the web how to get good results with your workout).
2) Spend few euros in your clothing. Buy the kind of stuff that only winners wear. (You have probably noticed that most guys that get the best girls have weird hair cuts or very weird clothes: MAINLY THEY WANT EVERYBODY THINK THEY ARE IMPORTANT, AND CHICKS EAT THAT B.S.. Really, they do.).
So, no wear too weird things (i can't at least), but some colors and fashion shapes instead of your everyday gray clothes will be something. Remember that you must make yourself noticed wherever you go.

Do you know how i got finally confidence?
3) You must re-start going to clubs (alone if you can't find friends to go with. Dont be a coward). After few months, you will know how easy it is to give french kisses to cute girls. (and being rejected few thousand times as well)
4) My next step was: In one club (i was 24), i started talking to this not great looking girl (an fat by the way), and ask her to have sex. As easy as that. (Not the first time i asked a girl, but the first time she actually said yes) (and lets face it, if you want something easy to get some experience, much better if you ask to girls that are not the target of most guys).

Since then (about a year ago), i've slept with real hotties (somehow i became a jerk). And i've had 3 girls (not the best looking girls i've slept with, and the only fat girl i have slept with included), who actually asked me for being her boyfriend. But right now, i like the game, and the forum has been giving me so cool ideas, that i said to all of them 'Sorry, i'm not looking for a girlfriend'. I mean, 3 years ago i would never ever look at me saying those words.

Well, that's it. Take it or leave it. And as someone post some time ago. F*uck them ASAP (as soon as possible). Doesnt matter how little experience you have (i had non at all when i started). F*uck them the same night if possible. Dont ask her phone number before asking her to sleep with you (if you already have her number, she will prefer to know you better and she will say NO).

If you just date her, you will give her too much time to evaluate you. And your still weik personality will make them think that they better wait for someone better than you.

I have no more knowledge to share. I'm not a real DJ. I just try to do the best i can, which most of the time is too little.


The Pursuivant.