Couple weeks ago, I posted a thread about how I needed to get the ballz to break it off with my GF of 3+ years.

The unanimous opinion was that it was the right thing to do.

Background:

*I'm almost 23, she's a year older.
*We had dated for over three years.

She's a very solid GF. Trustworthy, respectable, not a demanding b*tch, sensitive. There were issues, however, between us. One was her weight. She became a little chubby, and I don't like that. She's been working on it, but there haven't been a lot of results. Quite frankly I just think she needs to work on it a lot harder than she thinks (in terms of setting goals, diet, exercise time).

The biggest problem was that we were going seperate ways. My time is consumed with work and studying, and will be that way for many years to come. I really didn't have the time to be in a serious relationship.

On the other hand, she's in a position in life where she really wants to get serious with someone, hopefully have it lead to marriage, etc. She really needs someone who has the time to devote to a relationship, which really isn't me.

On top of that, I know that deep-down, I really haven't explored all that I want to with dating. There's a lot types and qualities of women that I want to be with.

So last night it finally ended (after several months of continual issues, drama, discussions, emotions).

And honestly, I don't feel as bad as I thought I would. I was so afraid of being alone that I let myself stay in a position that was not a good fit. I was afraid of change and "letting go."

Besides that, I have a new feeling of confidence that stems from being liberated and not feeling "stuck." Last night, I went out with a friend, and I was able to get some digits, flirt it up with a couple hot chicks. In fact, I already have three different dates scheduled for the next few days.

Even though I didn't feel great last night, I did feel more confident because I didn't have anything to hide. I could flirt and get chicks' numbers without feeling I was being deceptive to a GF. And this is a very good feeling to have. The women around me could pick up on this.

So in conclusion, thanks for everyone's advice from the earlier thread.

And to anyone who was in a position similair to mine--you're in a relationship and you honestly don't feel that it's working out but are having trouble breaing it off--I can tell you with certainty that it is the right thing to do. I'm not going to lie and say you won't feel crappy; you most likely will. But overall, you'll feel a lot better that you stepped up to the plate and took action to put yourself in a better position.

I have a question for you.

Since you dated this girl for three years do you feel as those three years wasted? Do you regret that it did not work out the way you wanted? Was there any thing that you appreciated/learned/ or liked so in 10 years from now you can say 'I'm glad I dated her for 3 years but happy I broke up"?

jamesw2010 said:

Even though I didn't feel great last night, I did feel more confident because I didn't have anything to hide. I could flirt and get chicks' numbers without feeling I was being deceptive to a GF. And this is a very good feeling to have. The women around me could pick up on this.

So in conclusion, thanks for everyone's advice from the earlier thread.

And to anyone who was in a position similair to mine--you're in a relationship and you honestly don't feel that it's working out but are having trouble breaing it off--I can tell you with certainty that it is the right thing to do. I'm not going to lie and say you won't feel crappy; you most likely will. But overall, you'll feel a lot better that you stepped up to the plate and took action to put yourself in a better position.

Click to expand...

Props on this post, and looking at the glass half full, to many posts like these end up being depressing the fact that you have a new lease on your "freedom" means your headed in the right way

bravo

a relatipnship end two ways:
a - you split up...
b - you get married....

you took the best choice !

Boxer: I don't feel any amount of time could truly be "wasted." I will tell you this: I stayed in the relationship for as long as I did because of my own insecurities, NOT because I was deeply in love with this girl.

I was in the relationship for the wrong reasons. I learned a lot from being with her, especially about myself.

Due to my inability to end it when I knew it was time to end it, I dragged it on. Eventually, the inevitable result came about: her IL sunk so low that we gradually grew apart to the point where we just decided to break up.

So lessons learned:

*Know why you're getting in a relationship.
*End a relationship when you know that it needs to end. Don't simply continue to drag it on.